can i just give a warning here.....for HEAVY sap.

the song is 'in your room' by depeche mode. i don't own it, i don't own fruits basket and i make no money from this.

let me know what you think.

In your room
Where time stands still
Or moves at your will
Will you let the morning come soon
Or will you leave me lying here
In your favourite darkness

His head rested on my chest, it felt like we had been here a million times, like this was everyday practice for us. I wished deep down that it was. For the first time in my life I felt contented, I took a deep breath in, closing my eyes and thanking whatever god was listening that I had him there with me.

When I awoke it was dark outside the curtains were not pulled so I could see the moon from Yuki's window, it seemed to shine brighter than usual. I looked down at him, He was still curled into me, his hands clawing into my shirt like he was frightened I was going to get up and run away. His hair was a mess that covered his eyes and the majority of his face; I could only just see his mouth which was relaxed and neither happy nor sad looking. Further down, his right leg had wrapped around my left one, so in theory he had wrapped himself around it. His slim thigh was pressed against my groin, which I tried so hard not to think about it. He was so peaceful.

I was ready to fall back to sleep, happy just to sleep the rest of the night in his room, knowing that nobody could walk in on us because I had blocked the door and Yuki was sound. But as I closed my eyes again, I heard footsteps creak past the door, and then:

"Oooh, Gure-san! Your hands are cold!"

My eyes flew open wide, and my ears pricked up. There was more to follow

"oh! Aya! Will you warm them for me?" what followed was a managerie of moans and sighs. Listening to them made me wonder what it would be like if Yuki and I did what they were so obviously, and so loudly doing. I could feel my cheeks heating and my pulse racing at the thought. While Shigure and Ayame made me feel ill, imagining Yuki, on top of me, straddling almost killed me as my heart felt like it was going to leap from my chest. I had to wake him up, get him to turn on some music so we could drown them out, or at least do something ourselves so we could ignore them. As the thought ran through my head I blushed at my own unintended innuendo, I didn't mean do something like 'that', although...

I stopped myself before I could continue my explicit train of thought. Running my fingers through his hair I whispered his name.

"Yuki?" my voice was more breathy then I thought it would have been. He didn't stir at all.

"Yuki" I tried again a bit louder and still nothing.

This time as I called his name I shook his shoulder and he stirred, I kept on adamant that he would wake up and endure this with me. Eventually, bright violet eyes through grey messy hair looked up at me. I almost melted back into the bed, there was something different about him when he woke this time, he didn't seem as angry as he usually was.

"what?" it wasn't a scowl or an angry statement, simply a question.

"listen" he went to question me again, but I silenced him.

After a few seconds more moans and sighs were heard through the walls. Even worse than before, there came a rhythmic banging on the floor.

His face contorted as he slowly realized what was happening next door.

"oh my god!"

"I know" I replied giving up all hope of getting those noises I was currently enduring out of my head.

"oh my god! Kyo! That's disgusting!" he sat bolt upright "that's my brother in there!"

"and both my cousins!" I added.

"eugh"

In truth I found his disgust quite funny, but I also understood it completely.

"what do we do?" he looked at me as if I had all of the answers.

"I don't know! I just didn't want to suffer it alone!"

He scowled at me and for a moment I felt all the old anger I used to feel well up inside me, I was about to shout at him, when even the thoughts inside my head were drowned out by an unusually loud scream of Shigure's name. #

I covered my eyes.

"oh...god....why are they doing this?"

Yuki said nothing. For a while there was only quiet, maybe, they had finished.

"I think it's over" Yuki said, shuffling so he could lie down again but he was interrupted by a muffled cry from the next room.

"what are they doing to each other!?" I almost pleaded.

"like you don't know" he replied

We looked at each other, although there was little light I could see his face was red. Sitting up I shuffled closer to him, so we sat facing just centimetres apart. I looked deep into his eyes, knowing I would love him in one way or another for forever. He stared back at me, and in the low light of the night. In that small room, suddenly all my fears were gone. I lifted my hand to cup the side of his face, then ran my fingers through his hair, it was so soft, I could do it forever.

"you're so beautiful" the words had left my mouth before I had even thought about saying them.

"I'm not" he lowered his eyes. He looked shamed.

"you are, Yuki. So, so beautiful"

"no, I'm not. I've heard people say it so many times now that those word have lost any meaning. It's all lies anyway. I'm not beautiful"

I dropped my hand from his hair to his hand and squeezed it gently. Looking back on it, the word I would say next would have needed some nerve, even though at the time it didn't feel like I did.

"Yuki, I think, in some way, after everything that has happened between us- I know you in some way other than anyone else. I know you in a way that you don't allow other people to. Right?"

He looked up at me, and nodded shyly.

"and so, I think, because I really really know you, I know you're beauty. When I say it I don't mean in it in the same way those people do. I mean it in only a way I can mean it."

His eyes widened, and I noticed them welling up. I tried not to be deterred though, I was on a roll, and I needed to tell him everything before I realized what it was I was actually saying.

"when I say you're beautiful, it's because I know the feel of your arms around me, and because I know how you snore when you sleep, and how-" my nerves, that had seemed to have been asleep suddenly woke up in me, but I knew I had to finish. "and because I know how the moon is, upon your face. This is why I think you are beautiful"

The whole speech didn't sound at all like me. But it was me, and it was all true. I looked down from him, afraid of his reaction. He dropped my hand, and I knew I had said something stupid. Ready for the onslaught, I was shocked when he pulled my chin, so I was looking up at him. He was crying freely, but I could see in his face he was not sad.

As he let his hand drop, I lifted mine to wipe away his tears, to stop them from marring his perfect face.

"you're so beautiful" I tried again, my own voice croaking from emotion.

He nodded lightly, I smiled, knowing my words had sunk in. On this night of bravery, I had one last thing I wanted to do. I swallowed deeply, so lost in him that I felt I could happily never find myself again. I slid my hand down from his cheek to rest on his neck, the skin was soft and smooth, exactly how I expected. I began to lean closer to him, slowly closing the small gap between us, and it seemed that Yuki understood too, as he came closer to me.

I closed my eyes, and I can only guess he copied. I felt his breath on me, on my skin, covering me in bursts, it made my skin tingle I only ever wanted him to be the one to do this to me. We edged even slower in the last few millimetres between us. But the gap was closed, and our lips touched. The warmth, the damp all washed over me in a whir, it was dizzying. His hand found my hair and gripped as we shared our first chaste kiss.

The taste of him overwhelmed me, and as the kiss broke of it's own accord, we still stayed close to each other, breathing each other's air and feeding off each other's energy. I could feel him moving, but I could not opened my eyes. He came in close to my ear and whispered:

"I love you, Sohma Kyo"

my skin prickled, and I slowly opened my eyes to find him close to me again, his eyes were all I could see. Yuki, the rat, my cousin, all of this madness, was suddenly the only thing that made sense in the world.

"I- I love you too."

I'm hanging on your words
Living on your breath
Feeling with your skin
Will I always be here?