After a quick snack, Leo returned to the infirmary and kept vigil over Raph, sitting by his bedside. Shortly after seven the next morning, July 31, Raphael stirred and let out a loud roar of pain. "Raph, you okay?" Leo asked anxiously, reaching out and touching his arm.
"ARGH! Hurts. Argh! DON'T FUCKIN' TOUCH ME, LEO!"
"I'll get Don."

Leo rushed into the kitchen where his brothers had been feeding his three boys and said, "Don, I need you. Raph's awake."
"I'm coming. Mikey, look after the boys, okay?"

Leo and Don went into the infirmary and Don said, "Raph, where does it hurt?"
"EVERYWHERE! Fuck."
"Raph, I'm going to turn you over, so prepare yourself. I need to give you something to eat and drink and examine your injuries, okay?"
"Whatever. ARGH." Don flipped him over and Raph whimpered, searing pain running through his body. "That fuckin' hurts, Don."
"I'll give you some pain killers and then you must eat something. Can you feel your limbs?"
"No."
"Nothing?"
"No. Fuck. What does that mean, Don?"
"What about if I touch you here?" Don said, touching Raph's lower leg.
"Nothin'."
"I'm sure it's….Let me give you something to eat, Raphie, and…" Don said, having a bad feeling what it was.
"What the hell's wrong with me? I wanna know. Tell me!"
"Swallow these pain pills and I will."

"Is he all right?" Leo asked.
"Do I look all right, dickhead?" Raph snarled. "It's yer fuckin' fault I'm like this. If ya'd only listened ta me…ARGH!"
"You're right," Leo said miserably. "It is my fault. I'm sorry, Raph."

"There'll be time for blame later," Don said, handing Raph some pain pills and a glass of water. "Take the pills and I'll examine you." Raph did as he was told and Don studied his injuries and said, "You have fractured ribs, Raph, various cuts and bruises. All of that should heal in time, but it's…" Don hesitated.
"Tell me, brainiac," Raph demanded, glaring at him.
"I've been examining your exposed spinal cord and it's…Raph, there's no easy way to say this, but not only can you not move your limbs because of what those bastards did, but I'm…"
"I'm a fuckin' paraplegic?" Raphael yelled.
"No, Raphie. A quadriplegic. You have no feeling above and below your waist. A paraplegic feels above his waist."
"GET OUT!" Raphael shouted. "Now."
"Raphie, this means…"
"I have ta wear shit diapers and be dependent on everyone for the rest of my fuckin' life. Fuck that. I wish I'd died. Would have been better if I had. Now I have ta endure this hell and seein' the pity on yer faces."

"Raph, I'll help you," Leo said.
"Ya won't touch me. The only ones who can go near me are my babies. The rest of ya can go ta hell, especially ya, Leo."

"Raphael, as your doctor, I won't leave you, so you can shove that attitude where the sun doesn't shine," Don said firmly. "I'll bring you something to eat and we'll discuss rehabilitation."
"Fuck rehabilitation. It won't work, Don. Face the facts. I'm a quadriplegic and my life is gonna be diapers and bed pans and sponge baths and pity! Fuck that. It's the pity I don't want most of all and knowin' I'm a burden ta ya all."

"You're not a burden, Raph," Leo said, fighting back tears. "We all love you and will be here for you."
"Why are ya still here, Leo? Don't ya have a psycho ta bang?"
"Raphie…."
"OUT! NOW." Raphael said, squeezing his eyes shut and tears starting to slide down his cheeks.

Leo looked at his ex-mate despondently and left the room. "You're harsh on him, Raph," Don admonished. "He's so sorry for everything and he already blames himself. I understand you're hurting, but shutting Leo out…."
"Can ya leave me alone, Don?"
"No. You're going to eat something. I'll be back shortly."
When Don had gone, Raph opened his eyes and said, "I wish I'd died. Fuck this. Fuck it. Just let me have a relapse and die or somethin'. I don't want this kinda life. It's embarrassin' and demeanin' ta a guy like me, who prided himself on his strength and independence!"

"Daddy," Rebecca said, approaching the bed and staring at him. "Stop it. You can fight this. You've always fought. Why give up now?"
"Because, little girl," Raph said snappily. "I can't move or do nothin'. This is my life and I hate it. Bein' dependent on everyone is humiliatin'."
"So fight, Daddy. Give it your all, instead of whining, forgive me, like a little boy who didn't get his cookies and milk!"
"Ya little…How dare ya talk ta me like that!" Raphael hissed.
"Someone has to and make you see sense. Where's your fighting spirit? Gone? If you don't fight and try to get better, those psychos won, Daddy. Do you want them to win?"
"No. I hate them and I'd like ta break their necks," Raph said furiously.
"That's the Daddy I know and love. So, Daddy, if you want to get revenge, you aren't going to do it by sitting here and crying, are you? And also, my brothers need you, so get off your sorry ass and fight! Do the rehab, whatever it takes so you can get better! Stop acting like a quitter and a loser!"
"Man, yer tough!"
"I should be," Rebecca said. "I take after you in looks and attitude, so do what I said, Daddy. You can do it. Will you try?"
"Yeah, I will."
"And stop being so hard on Daddy. He loves you. Talk to him."
"I ain't ready ta talk ta him, Rebecca. I got enough ta deal with right now."
"But you will…."

"Who are you talking to, Raph?" Don said, entering the room with a bowl of soup.
"My daughter, Rebecca. Ya know the one I miscarried after that battle with tin can. Would have been a girl if she'd lived and Leo and I loved the name Rebecca. She's been watchin' out for me. Can ya see her? She's standin' right near the bed."
"No, don't see anything, Raphie. Here's some soup," Don said, lifting Raph's head up and feeding him.
Raph swallowed and said, "I ain't imaginin' it, Don. My daughter's here."
"I don't believe in ghosts and it's understandable you'd see things. You're suffering from PTSD and..."
"Don't fuckin' patronize me, Don! I know what I heard and saw. I ain't crazy."
"Heh. Eat your soup, Raphie. Then you can sleep."
"Don, do you believe in the afterlife?"
"Nope. Do you?"
"Yeah. I know I saw and spoke ta my daughter. I never believed in it before, but I do now."
"Eat your soup, Raph," Don said, spooning soup into Raph's mouth.
After swallowing, Raph said, "Where do ya think we go when we die?"
"We just simply stop existing. That's what I think. I'm a scientist, Raph, and I don't believe in Heaven or hell. There's no proof of each and I need cold, hard facts. Give me proof and maybe you'll change my mind. Eat up. We're nearly done."

Raphael dutifully finished the soup and said, "Now what, Don?"
"I've asked April to bring over some adult diapers. I know it's embarrassing, Raph, but would you like to pee on yourself instead? She'll be here in a while. You get some sleep in the meantime."
"And rehab?"
"We'll start it later today after lunch if you want."
"I do want. I ain't gonna stay this way forever, Don. I'm gonna walk again and play ball with my boys. Take them hikin', fishin', stuff like that."
"What changed your mind about rehab?"
"Rebecca and my boys. I need ta fight and be strong for them. They need me."
Don rolled his eyes and said, "Rebecca was just a mass, not even…."
"Don't ya say it, Don!"
"I'll see you just now."

She does exist, Raph thought angrily, shutting his eyes. I wasn't seein' things. My daughter's here with me and always with me. I know she is. Screw Don and his science brain. And screw Leo too. I ain't ready ta talk ta him. I only want my boys around me and I suppose Don, because he has ta look after me. And Brennan? If yer still out there, I'm gonna get ya and kill ya with my bare hands, so enjoy yer remainin' days on earth while ya can! With that last thought, Raph fell fast asleep.