Shore Leave—Segment 21
Short Mass Effect Fanfic
Setting: Shortly after Mass Effect 1
Pairings: FemShep/Joker
Joker settled comfortably in his chair, easily preforming the complex warm-up routines for lift-off, receiving clearance from Altairean docking officials, and running a final systems check while waiting for the crew roll-call to be finished. He'd done it so many times that the motions had become automatic a long time ago and he grinned contentedly. This was where he belonged—in the pilot's seat, speaking to his baby in ways no one would ever understand, flying the Commander around to various dangerous systems…but it always scared him a little when she went out that airlock or dropped in the Mako. It wasn't that he didn't trust her to take care of herself—Shepard was the most capable person he'd ever known—but there would always be something unexpected, some unknown factor that threw off the mission equation (problem plus Shepard equals success and sunshine). He twisted his mouth, thinking intently.
Waiting had been the safe decision, had been her decision so he'd respect it, but was it the right one? Any random factor could result in her death or his. Any stupid mistake could mean victory for the big metal squids. Was it really wrong or dangerous to grab a little joy and run with it? Ah well…she'd pull through. She always beat the odds and he'd always be there for her. Yeah…love conquers all, and all that shit, right? This isn't some sappy holovid. He shook his head to dismiss the negative thoughts. He always got a little depressed when he was hung-over. And even if it was, she'd never pick you.
"Hah!" he hissed at himself, "But she did. So maybe we are in a sappy holovid. I could live with that."
The comic-relief character always dies in those vids.
"Maybe I'm not the comic-relief character. Maybe I'm the snarky-but-sensitive best-friend-turned-love interest. Or what if I'm the underdog hero who saves the day?" He grinned, liking this tangent, "Maybe I get the girl and live happily ever after, huh? What d'ya think about that?"
The negative thoughts were silent and he nodded confidently, "Yeah…I'm gonna go with that."
He pulled his cap low and became aware of a strange smell. What the…? He took it off entirely and sniffed it gingerly. When was the last time he'd washed it? When Dad said it was bad luck to. Hm. It really did smell rather rank…several years of constant use tended to accumulate sweat stains and a certain unsavory musk. Don't do it. His positive mood made the old superstition seem silly and he got up from his seat.
You're seriously gonna jeopardize your lucky streak? Pfft. They were just going on a routine patrol. It'd be a couple of weeks, tops, and by then his hat would be sufficiently dirty to be considered lucky again.
What's the worst that could happen?