# CHAPTER 20

Stacie's POV

I looked at the girl who's the reason why I am here and still hurting to see her that if she wakes up, she still doesn't like me.

Yeah.

It hurts to know that she don't like me as much as I like her.

It hurts to know that all of the effort I've been putting into our 'relationship' has been for nothing. I look like an idiot trying to get her attention at all.

It hurts to know that my love is one-sided, my feelings are one-sided, my hopes are one-sided.

It hurts to know she can go weeks without texting me and not miss me at all.

It hurts to know she've read my messages and decided that they weren't important enough to answer.

It hurts when she post new pictures on Facebook while I'm still waiting for a text back from her.

It hurts to wake up thinking about her and fall asleep thinking about her, even though I probably never cross her mind.

It hurts when she act like I'm invisible, like I mean absolutely nothing to her even though she mean the world to me.

It hurts to know that I feel so strongly about her and I'm not even a blip on her radar.

It hurts to feel like I'm not hot enough, not fun enough, not good enough.

It hurts when she walk back into my life after a long day only to lead me on again, to feed me false hope again. To have my body again. It hurts that she think she can rotate in and out of my life whenever she wish. That she can do whatever she want and I'll just allow it to happen.

It hurts when she send me mixed signals. When she give me a sign that maybe things will work out after all. That maybe we could end up together.

It hurts when she act like she like me, too. When she give me the impression that my love isn't one-sided after all.

It hurts when she make me feel smart, strong, sexy. When she make me fall harder for her than I already have.

It hurts when she give me even more reasons to love her.

But most of all, it hurts when she get my hopes up again, because I know it's only a matter of time until I'm disappointed again. Until I remember that we're never going to become official, that she's never going to become mine.

I like her but I'm tired.

"You're unbelievable." Chloe said and shook her head in disappointment. I let out playful smirk.

"I'm also thinking about messing up with your girl before. She looks so attractive to me when I accidentally bumped on her." I said in a very flirtatious voice. She cringed.

"You two what?"

"We bumped each other. That's how we met before. Actually I almost step on her and that's hilarious." I chuckled. How come Beca didn't told her about me? Is it because she's whipped? Or she's really not interested on me? Well. I prefer the first choice.

"Okay. But you can hit everyone else but not MY Beca." She emphasized the 'MY' so I will be reminded that Beca and her had a label. I chuckled again and looked at Emily's peaceful face. I'm not going to do this if you could just tell everyone I'm yours and totally make me yours with a label. I looked back at Chloe.

"But she's really attractive and hot I think."

"She is. So stop your hots on her."
"So possessive, eh? Can I admire her for a seconds?" I said and she scoffed.

"Even a miliseconds. Dude, no. If you still want a peaceful life then leave her alone. Leave us alone."

"What if-

Then the door flung open that made me stopped from talking.

"Here's the food ladies." The short hair girl detective said and gave us a paper bag of Mcdonald's. "Eat first. Stacie. If you don't mind please if you can convince Aubrey to eat please do it." She smiled at us before going out again.

I did as what she told me and walked towards Aubrey. I sat beside her and tried to talk to her.

"Bree." I mumbled. She didn't even gave me a glance. I held her forearm and she finally looked at me.

But I regretted it. What else would hurt me this much?

"Who are you?"

Chloe's POV

It's been a day since Beca, Aubrey and Emily been knocked out by some drugs and they look like they are in some coma right now. Fat Amy decided to connect them with dextrose so they'll be okay if they woke up.

I'm still wondering why Aubrey speak like she knew everyone except from Stacie. She could also barely hear. The latter got disappointed and didn't bother to introduce herself though. She went home exactly after Amy and her talked privately.

"Is it same effect with the drug you showed in the meeting with me?" I asked to Jessica. Obviously it's not but I wanna make sure that they will not going to die in any days from now on.

We're the only two here coz it's going to Christmas Eve and some of the girls are preparing for tonight.

Not me.

Coz I don't have anyone to celebrate it.

Except with this sleeping beauty.

"No. It probably different coz it's Fethum100 and it changed into a blue color."

"What's the color of it before?"

"Red liquid but now it's blue tablet."

"Why they are doing this?"

"To conquer the world?"

"Oh. I think it's impossible with that kind of drug.."

"Unless Beca wasn't their world though."

"Wait. What does that mean?"

"They hated Beca to the bone and they're ready to kill just to make Beca fight back and unhappy."

"But why? Why are they doing that? I think there's a reason behind it." And I think that's the reasons I need to know.

"That's the part I don't know. Seriously no one knows why and how. We just know that we need to protect her from anything."

"Okay. I believe in you-

"No. Don't believe in me. Believe in yourself. Don't trust anyone here. Beca thinks someone in this group is betraying her."

"Really?"

"She thinks so. Since she said that I looked at everyone, everyday. Even you. I look at you."

"You can look at me whenever you wanted. I'm still on Beca's side no matter what."

"I hope you won't regret saying that." Why the hell they kept on saying that words? I'm getting confuse of a matter if it's really a matter or what. I can't imagine Beca does something horrible or insane or what. Did she ever cheat that's why Jade triggered to suicide?

I had so many questions in my mind but I rather ignore it and wait for Beca's answer. I need to know it from her and not from anyone else.

"Anyway, why aren't you preparing for Christmas Eve?"

"I don't believe in Christmas." She said that made me frown. "Kidding." She giggled and I glared at her. "I'm with these girls whenever it's Christmas."

"Why? You don't have anyone?"

"Did Beca ever told you that I'm her adopted sister?"

Wait.

WHAT?

"Oh. It seems like she really didn't tell you about it." She sighed. "Well. Now you know."

"This is a real revelation for me." I said in a very innocent voice. She laughed. "Why? I mean- how?"

"A very long story." She said. "And please don't tell Beca about what I told you."

I really admire her calmness and being naive. She's so positive and sweet. And I'm starting to doubt it.

Is she single?

"Do you have a.. boyfriend?"

"None. Why?"

"Nothing."

"If you're wondering why, I can answer that with, I'm busy with protecting that dork." She winked. "Also I'm busy making my muscles bigger."

"It's like you can lift me with one hand with your so big muscles." I sarcastically said. She has no muscles at all and like an ordinary gym enthusiast.

"Do you wanna try me?" She smirked. I know that smirk!

"Oh no. Thanks." I shook my head in disapproval. She just chuckled.

Ashley's POV

I'm here at the grocery store with Flo and she's acting weird after the incident last night.

I have the urge to need to know about it.

"What are you thinking lady?" I asked without looking at her but I saw in my peripheral view that she startled.

"What?"

"You're acting weird actually."

"Y-Yeah. I just saw s-someone last night while I'm planting C4. I'm not sure about it." She whispered while still pushing the cart.

"Who was it?"

"I saw Jade."

"What?!" I finally looked at her in my very shocked face. She gave me a should-i-repeat-look. "But she's dead dude. It's impossible."

"That's why I'm not sure about it."

"We saw her corpse laying inside the coffin, right?"

"Yes. Maybe it is her gho-

"I'm not buying it. Maybe someone is imposing as her and we need to know it." I said in a very determine voice. "Fat Amy is now examining Aubrey. I also heard that she had an amnesia where she could not remember Stacie alone and that's questionable."

"I think that's the effect of Fethum100 2nd shot." Flo remarked.

"Losing memory?" I asked and she shook her head.

"Losing some of her memory. Genesis know us. Maybe they're trying to make the Apollo's brain be drained and execute all the part where she knew how to use computer."

"Great deduction Flo but what if she's just acting like that at all?"

"Why is it then? What's the effect of the Fethum to her if it's just act?"

"I don't know. Let's move on and go back on this. We need to hurry coz we must buy gifts- ouch!" I whined when someone bumped me. She's wearing a sun glasses inside the department store like it's sunny day here. She's also wearing a black cap and denim jacket. Her hair was bright brown and curly like Jessica's. She's as tall as me. Her skin is pale white. She also had a backpack. She didn't speak and stood still where I bumped her. "What the hell you think you're doing?" I slightly pushed her shoulder. I waited for her to speak but she didn't and I looked stupid standing there like I'm talking to the statue of Liberty. Flo whispered to me that made me gasped.

"I think she's blind."

"I'm sorry if I do something awful to you." She finally spoke and her voice sounds so good in the ear. "But I'm blind and.. deaf. I'm sorry."

"You're blind and deaf but you reached this part of the mall?" I asked incredulously.

"If you're wondering why I could speak english is because I'm not deaf before but I'm blind since birth. I hope you're still there. Listening to me. Well. I'm used to being sounds stupid before even until now. I'm lucky I didn't hear anything stupid rants like before." I saw a drop of water ran through her cheek.

I felt a tag on my shirt. Flo was asking me to go but I can't. I think I had a responsibility on this pretty girl. Not that because she's pretty but I think she deserves my help after I became rude to her.

"Hey. Don't tell me you'll-

I held her soft hand. Shit. I saw her form a smile.

"You're cold. I think you're a girl base on your long nails and small fingertips. Please don't leave me. I went in this place with my boyfriend and I think he dumped me."

I sighed at what happened to her. I'm thankful I know how braille works so I held her hand and face her palm to me. I did some taps and dots on her palm and she grinned. She also had a complete white teeth.

"What are you doing?" Flo said to me. We caught some attentions now but I don't care. I told her to come with me.

"Sure. I'll come with you but how did you know that?"

She waited for a while. I told her I'm a detective.

"Thank you so much for your help smart detective. I'm Lee. Lee Anne Tapnio." She introduced and walked towards me. I pulled her and started walking.

"I don't know your type of person is blind and deaf. Well. That's cool. You don't need more blindfolds."

"Shut up."

When we got to the mansion. Flo went to the kitchen to give the items to the maids and went to her room to take some rest. I leave Lee on the couch for a while to go to the library to find the talking books like a dictionary for blinds that will tell her what I want to say to her coz seriously it took so much time to tell her a three word sentence.

When I got to the living room's couch, I saw her calmly sitting on the couch with a right posture. I held her hand then she smiled again. I told her to read the book I gave her she sensed it for a while and finally open it. I guided her hand to the part where I want to tell her, "What do you feel right now?"

"I felt happy. This place smells good and I felt so safe. Am I in the hospital?" I told her no. "Police station?" I told her no. "Your house?" I finally told her yes. "Wow."

I held her hand again and guided it to the part where I wanted to tell her, "Are you hungry?" She just nodded.

Awe.

I told her to wait me. I released my hand to her hand to go to the kitchen. The maids greeted me when I entered the cooking area. They're still cooking so I went to the fridge to see if there's still something to eat. I found a burrito and some fruit cocktail. I prepared it to the tray and immediately went back to the living room.

I held her hand again to notice me. I smiled when she smiled. I told her that the food is here. She didn't speak but she just bit her lower lip. Of course Ashley she's blind and she can't eat with herself alone.

Fine.

I told her that I'll help her.

I didn't know it would be difficult as I ever imagine. I pulled her to sit on couch while facing me. I took off her back pack that made her gasped. "You smells so good detective." I just smiled.

I placed some napkin on her lap. I handed her the plate and guide her hand to hold the food. I sat closer to her and guided her hand to the right place so she won't done a mess.

She finally took her first bite and slowly chewed it. She sometimes poured some of burrito and fruit cocktail but I ignored it. I'm still holding her other hand coz she's not letting me by gripping om mine.

Then suddenly Jessica entered the living room. She widen her eyes and immediately went back from her previous state. Blank face.

"It's not what you think Jessica."

She nodded sarcastically. "Great then."

"She's-

"I'm tired keeping an eye to everyone while you're just flirting here and oh!- you really dragged her to this mansion huh? Fair enough." She stated and walked out while stretching her arms wide.

I'm such a mess.