I'm having trouble deciding exactly where I want to go with this so... ideas are welcome!

CHAPTER 21

I stumble as my feet land on pavement. The train I just jumped out of rumbles past as my hands skim the asphalt, but I manage to get my balance back. Clouds block the moonlight and it's dark and eerie, but I'm used to seeing in the dark. Dauntless is always dark.

I spot long pale hair swinging slightly a couple blocks ahead of me and break into a run to catch up. This conversation is not likely to be rainbows and unicorns. This really isn't how I expected to end my night. I should have stopped that kiss a lot faster… definitely should have. I'd be irritated too probably if it had been Tris being kissed by Four, even if it was a dare, if she didn't try to cut it off quickly. But I was raised with very different ideas about showing affection than Tris was. She needs to adjust to it, faction before blood and all, but I get that it probably means more to her than for the rest of us.

I fall into step next to Tris. She glances at me for only a moment then continues to silently walk back to Dauntless. But I take it as a good sign that she isn't protesting me being next to her.

And now my mind is back to the conversation- or, more likely, argument- we'll be having in a few minutes. I didn't mean for that to happen. I just, I don't know. Four was giving her these looks and I was getting jealous.

Maybe that is the reason I didn't stop the kiss. Maybe I was just trying to make her jealous, even if I didn't realize it at the time. But somewhere in the back of my mind… yep, I'm pretty sure that's exactly what I was trying to do. So far it really doesn't seem to be working out to my benefit. First she seemed to feel like I was picking on him and his fear of heights, then Kate got that dare and kissed me… and definitely invaded my, uh, personal space… and I did nothing to stop it. If Four had made out with and pawed his hands all over Tris, and she didn't stop him as fast as she could, I'd be pretty pissed, too.

Damn it.

When Dauntless is in sight, neither of us has said a word, and it's making me feel like crawling out of my skin. Tris finally breaks the silence.

"We need to talk," she says flatly. Those four words are rarely good. As we enter Dauntless, she lets me take the lead at finding a good spot to have our… discussion. I end up taking her to Zeke's. I know there's no one there right now, because Zeke and all his close friends are out playing Dare.

A few minutes later, I find myself on Zeke's couch next to Tris, holding a beer I don't remember taking from the fridge. I guess it's just such a habit now that it's muscle memory or something.

Just as Tris opens her mouth to speak, I cut her off. "I'm sorry, Tris. I didn't choose for that to happen on the train, but I shouldn't have let it go on like it did. I think I was trying to make you jealous because of the whole thing with Four. I know what he said to you last night." I keep my eyes on my beer bottle as I pick at the label.

Tris bites her lip. "I know," she says simply, and I don't hear even a hint of anger in her voice.

Well, now I'm officially confused. What was the big deal if she gets it?! "You… understand?" I feel like a headache is starting behind my forehead from how much I'm scrunching up my face tonight. "Then why did you run off?"

She suddenly stands and starts like… pacing, I guess. What the hell is this about? "Tris," I say in the tone of voice like I heard a guy use with a nervous horse when we visited Amity once, "Babe, calm down and just tell me what's going on. I'm afraid you're going to chew a hole in your lip. Pretty soon it's going to start bleeding." With a huff she releases her lower lip from her teeth and rubs her palms on her legs. And… is she about to cry?! I get to my feet and wrap an arm around her shoulders, pulling her against me. Her arms hang limply at her sides, but she rests her head on my chest. "What happened, Tris? You're worrying me." My fingers trace nothings on her back, but her body stays tense. "Why did you jump off the train back there?"

My hand rises and falls with her back as she takes a deep breath and lets it out. "I was irritated about that girl and you, but really it was that I felt guilty."

My hand stops moving over her back. Someone dropped a rock in my stomach, I think. This sounds like a sitting down conversation, so i pull her back down onto the couch and just hold her hand, trying my best to look approachable and understanding, but serious. Apparently it works, because she keeps talking.

"I did hang around the chasm this afternoon, but um… Four took me down by the water." Down by.. What the heck is she talking about? The river is like really far down from the edge of the chasm, and I've never seen anyone down there. And more importantly… Four?! "He and Zeke, i guess, both know about how to get to the rocks by the river pretty much totally out of sight of anyone."

I'm a little hurt that Zeke has never shown me this secret place, but I can think about that one later. "So… just you and Four?" She nods. "What… what was…" I rub my face with my hands; I just can't even form the thoughts so apparently instead of saying nothing, my mouth is just going to sit there and stutter no matter how much I urge myself to just shut up and let her talk.

"I went as friends, you know? I mean, he's the only person here that's from home and I'd like to be friends."

"But…" I prompt her, dragging the word out.

"But… I guess you were right. He does like me."

I close my eyes. "And how did you find that out? It's not like you pick up on that stuff so easily, you didn't even see it when I told you he did." There's a lump forming in my throat. "And I just told you that last night, and today…" Looking up, I'm met with Tris's wide, round eyes and her lips slightly parted. She swallows thickly. I've never heard her sound so small as when she answers.

"He kissed me."

I freeze. My heart pounds in my ears and my fists clench. If I actually knew where they all were right now I'd go out and beat the crap out of Four. I thought he was, my friend, at least sort of. What kind of friend does that?! I feel like I'm in a fog as I find myself pacing around the room, rubbing my face in my hands.

"Did you kiss him back?" I stop and turn toward my girlfriend. I'm afraid of what her answer might be and hold my breath.

"Yes." I grab the whiskey and take a few gulps straight from the bottle as she continues. "I was surprised, and after a few seconds I stopped him and left."

Well, when she said she did kiss him back, I wasn't expecting her to say that she stopped it after a moment. My focus is on me and Tris now, not on Four. I'll deal with him later, but right now Tris is sitting in front of me and she's what I should focus on. I close my eyes and take some deep, calming breaths as I clench and unclench my fists. My heart is still pounding in my ears. Don't say anything until you're calm, Uriah. Delicate, warm arms wrap around my back and I feel Tris press herself against my chest. This helps.

"Why did you go off with him alone?"

She's silent. For so long it feels like another being pushing me away from her. I loosen my grip around her. I need to get out of here. She's not even answering me, and I'm getting mad, and I need to get out of here, or she does. My whole body is straining to run away.

"I don't know." Oh, she speaks. Finally. "I want him to be my friend, he's the only one from home. I really thought you were wrong about his feelings about me. I don't know why either of you are interested in me. It doesn't make any sense. You both could have someone so much better."

Oh, for Christ's sake. This again? I scoff. "I told you, Tris, if you could just see yourself through my eyes…" It hurts to see the tears escaping from her beautiful, round eyes. They're as gray as a stormcloud right now.

What do I really need to know? "Do you still want to be with me?" All my muscles feel like tightly coiled springs waiting for her answer, but there's a knot in the pit of my stomach because I'm dreading it too. I know what it will be. Why would she want to be with me now? It's Four. Of course she'll choose him. No girl would choose me over him. He's a Dauntless Prodigy, basically Dauntless's most eligible bachelor.

But she doesn't hesitate. "Yes." Her hands thread through my curly hair as she pulls my head down to capture my lips in a kiss. She's choosing me? She's really choosing me? Over Four?!

For this moment I forget all the problems and just kiss back, my hands moving up and down her sides. She's sorry, that's good enough. I slide them further down her body, grasping her thighs and lifting her up, so our faces are level. Her legs wrap around my waist and I push her into the wall for support as she gently bites my lower lip, and I can't help but moan. With her trapped between me and the wall, my hands are free again and they slide slowly up, my fingers finding their way under the hem of her shirt as I break the kiss and move my lips to her jawline. Her head tilts up, gasping as she gives me better access to her neck as my hands slide under her shirt. I feel her tense slightly, then relax, so I continue moving my hands up. I kiss each of the ravens on her collarbone as my hand reaches the bottom of her bra, and she moans.

And the door swings open, Zeke's loud voice filling the room and jolting me back to reality. I pause slightly but don't put her down yet. "-was awesome. Peter's lucky Eric didn't beat him within an inch of his life." I don't even care what the dare was, I don't want to, because I hear Four laughing then abruptly stop when he enters the room and, I assume, sees me pressing Tris against the wall.

We've both stopped and looked their way, and I gently put Tris back on the ground as every bit of anger that was coursing through me before is back.

Zeke is unphased by finding us in his apartment, but Four's face is priceless. His eyes are wide and his jaw dropped, then he narrows his eyes, his face turns red, and he presses his lips together as he clenches his fists. His eyes are on Tris as I cross the room and he's apparently so focused on her that he doesn't even try to stop my fist as it swings at his face. I don't think he noticed at all. That is, until my fist collides with his jaw.

"What the fuck, Uri?!" Zeke yells as Four expertly shifts to a fighting stance and swings at my stomach. Good thing I'm the first ranked fighter in our class, just like Four was, because the guy has never lost a fight. In recent years, though, neither have I. When I was a little kid, sure, but not in quite a while.

I block the punch and swing with my left at his nose, but he ducks in time. Somewhere in my mind I hear Tris yelling and pleading but I'm too mad to try to understand the syllables. Four tries to punch me in the temple, but Zeke grabs his arm, wrapping his other around Four's torso, pulling him back as Tris ducks between us and pushes me away from Four.

My breathing is ragged as she pulls me to the couch and sits me down. "Uri, stop. Calm down! Please!" she pleads.

Zeke is dragging Four to another corner of the room. I can't hear what he's saying to him, but Four stays where he is as Zeke crosses to the center of the room, glaring at me. "What the hell was that, Uriah?!"

"Why don't you ask Four?" I don't take my eyes off the backstabbing asshole in the corner and he glares back at me. Zeke looks at Four expectantly, but he doesn't speak. He just stands, stomps to the door and yanks it open, slamming it as he leaves.