Just as Before

A/N: Not mine (But not really Stephen King's either.)

Dual songs for this chapter:

Beyond the Sea, by Jack Lawrence, released in 1949

Joy to the World, by Three Dog Night, released in 1971

I know a lot of writers tag songs in chapters, and I know a lot of you, like me, ignore the songs. In the case of this story, each song really was selected for particular reasons, so I really suggest checking online for the songs you don't know.

When they left the apartment on Wednesday, Mara had insisted on bringing Duke along. They would technically be at work, but Mara thought it was a perfect time to try removing a gift.

Two birds, one stone.

"I think we need to talk to Dwight, and probably Vince and Dave." Mara eventually said.

"Why Vince and Dave?" Duke questioned.

"We need Vince to help keep the Guard out of the way- if they're getting one set of instructions from Dwight and another from Vince, it'll get messy. Besides, I owe them."

Nathan nodded thoughtfully.

"Dwight first, then?"

"Dwight first."

Duke was a little disturbed, the way nobody even blinked anymore when he showed up at the precinct. If this kept up, he was going to have to insist that he go on the payroll.

Dwight's office was open when they arrived. Mara knocked anyway, waiting for him to look up before they came in.

"Do you have a few minutes, Dwight?"

"Sure, sit down." He looked at Duke as the door closed. "I'm guessing this isn't official business."

"Not precisely, no. No paperwork to file. But it does involve you, and the people who report to you."

They sat, and Mara thought for a second. "I -we- have some things to explain. Mostly me, I guess, but I thought we'd be more comfortable with these two."

"This is going to be bad, isn't it?"

"No? Yes? Decide after, ok? But I'm Mara right now. Audrey's here too, they'll verify I'm not trying to take over or anything."

"No," Duke interrupted, "she's not trying to take over, she's trying to get herself killed."

"Stop being mad about that, Duke. I told you I'd do my best. Can we not rehash this now?"

Duke shrugged, and she hooked her ankle around his, resting her casted hand on his leg.

Dwight watched with narrowed eyes, sipping his coffee.

"Your great-great...very great grandfather was named Joshua. He and his brother Jacob were the first Gifted people in your family. Jacob was first, technically, but he never had children, so it came to you through Joshua.

"They volunteered, you know. Your whole family has always been trying to help people. They wanted to be Paladins. The original gift just made them frontline fighters- any aggressor would be drawn to them first, and they were very strong, very brave. They could fight off anything, allowing the people around them to get to safety.

"Joshua's brother Jacob was a very close friend of mine."

Mara told her story again, and she could see by the pity in his eyes that he believed her.

"I know it's too late for your daughter, and I'm sorry. I wish I could fix that. But I had no way of safely removing a gift... until now."

"What do you mean, 'until now'? Are you saying you do have a way to end the Troubles?"

Mara gazed at Duke, silently asking his permission. He looked worried, but he trusted her enough to nod slightly.

"Not all at once, no. But individually... yeah, we do. If you and Duke can trust me enough to try. We should go somewhere we can test it, though. And bring a vest for Duke, just in case."

"Mara, if I get shot, I'm going to be seriously vexed." Duke tried to sound teasing, but missed the mark.

She put her hand to his cheek. "I wouldn't risk you for anything, you should know that. Besides, that's why we're bringing a vest!" She laughed at the look on his face and kissed his cheek. "We'll use a .22, even if it hits the vest, it probably won't even knock you down. And when this works- and it will- you'll be everyone's hero. You're already my hero."

"Okay, stop with the sweet talk. I'll do it. I don't want the Chris Brody treatment, but you'll owe me later- a personal favor." Duke winked, lecherous.

They went to the range, which was empty.

Mara turned to Dwight, held her left wrist out and let the Maze flare to life. "Can you trust me?"

He looked at her, astonished. "I thought only birthright Guardians could do that."

"That much is true, at least. You guys haven't forgotten everything. Except for the fact that you're all birthright guardians."

"Then how... nevermind. You can tell me later. What do we need to do?"

The men stood around her, and she borrowed Nathan's knife.

"Duke, it's just like we discussed. Take the Aether back. When you release it this time, I'll be here. Don't be afraid. Don't think about anything that upsets you, okay?"

He took a deep breath and nodded, blowing out heavily.

"Dwight, hold out your hand, and try to keep still. I'm working with one hand, so I can't exactly restrain you."

Mara took a deep breath and carefully cut into the palm of Dwight's hand. Duke immediately reached out to catch the drops of blood.

Duke's eyes rolled back, and Nathan held him upright, whispering encouragement in his ear. When the silver eyes met hers, she was relieved to see no madness, no thirst. Just her Duke.

A fat, black tear formed in his eye and he blinked, letting it out. Mara had her hand out, beckoning, and the tear made a beeline for the Maze on her wrist. She shivered, rolled her fingers together, and the tear formed a solid black orb in her palm that they all recognized.

Clean Aether.

She put it carefully in her pocket, wrapped in tissue. Her heart was sprinting, trying to get away from her body. She focused on keeping her voice calm and precise.

"Okay, good. Vests secure? Nathan, aim for the target. In 3, 2, 1-" She held her breath.

The soft crack of the .22 sounded, and the bullet hit the paper target, center mass.

"Again." Mara ordered quietly.

Another crack.

Another hole.

No deviation.

They all exhaled at once. Duke was patting himself all over, looking for holes. When he looked at her, his eyes were normal, and he was grinning. They looked at Dwight, unharmed, and Mara squealed- actually squealed- with joy.

"You did it!" She leapt on Duke, hugging him so hard he thought the bullet might have been less painful, kissing him til he was dizzy and breathless. They all crowded around, Mara running her hands over them, ecstatic. Nathan got a bone-crushing hug next, then he took Duke aside for closer examination as she threw herself at Dwight, laughing and crying all at once.

"Thank you, thank you. Jacob would be so proud."

Dwight was hugging her back, stunned. "Does this mean it's gone? Not just from me, but every Hendrickson, forever?"

"Yes." Mara nodded solemnly. "All of it- not just the bullet-magnet, but also the original gift, the protection one. I could redo it, without the bullet-attraction, but that would be your choice. It's not your fight. You've done enough, I'm not going to ask for more. I just want you to be happy."

Dwight looked like he'd just witnessed a natural disaster, not been saved from the Trouble that had brought him to Haven in the first place.

"I won't be able to protect people?"

"Of course you will, you silly, adorable fool. You protected people before your gift activated, I know you did. You'll just have more choice in the matter. If you decide you want a gift to help you do that, I'll give it- but think about it. Enjoy a little normal while you can.

"Eventually, William will be back, and that affects you, too. But not today, Dwight."

Mara reached out, unfastening the ever-present flak jacket, grunting as she tried to pull it off of him with one hand. After a moment, he caught on, ducking to help her remove it. He stretched, obviously feeling naked without it.

"Come tell me, or Audrey or Duke or Nathan, if you decide you want something. If it's in my power, I'll do it."

"I don't know what to say. Thank you, all of you." He looked at Nathan, remembering his anger when the meteors were falling. "I was wrong, you know. You did the right thing."

Nathan looked a little sad, and Duke and Mara wondered what they'd missed.

"I understand. Always did. Just try to keep the Guard off us for awhile."

"No." Mara spoke suddenly. "Talk to the Guard. Show them. I need to talk to them all. Make a list, please, of the worst afflicted. Find a way to get them to me. We should help as many as possible, right away- while there's time. Tell them that I will fix their afflictions and give new gifts to anyone who wants to stay a Guardian. And for gods sake, tell them to stop with the tattoos. I'll explain when we meet. Just tell me when you know."

Nathan stopped her, a hand on her arm. "Mara, are you-"

"Yes, Nathan. I'm sure. Too many secrets, remember? Oh. Speaking of, Dwight- you should know- we're pregnant. We're not telling everyone just yet, but we can't hide it much longer. So if you could warn us if one of them wants to take a shot at me, I'd appreciate it."

Poor Dwight. What a lot to take in for one day. He looked like he needed a nap or a drink. Mara elbowed Duke. 'Free drinks' she mouthed at him.

"What, seriously?"

She narrowed her eyes at Duke. "If you want to do 'yoga' again."

"I almost took a bullet- alright, alright. Free drinks for you at the Gull tonight, Sasquatch. I'll tell the staff."

Back in the Bronco, driving towards the Herald, Mara put her hand on Nathan's knee.

"I'm going to fix you, too. I just... I should feel bad about this, but I didn't want to try it on you until I knew it would work. And then we were with Dwight, and I figured maybe it should just be the four of us." She blushed, and Nathan smirked.

"If we didn't have to deal with Vince and Dave, I'd stop the truck right here. Give the good citizens a free show."

Mara, Audrey and Duke laughed.

Mara had been trying to think about what to say to the Teagues', but she still hadn't figured it out when they pulled up.

'Just tell the truth. Wing it. It usually works for me.'

'When I don't plan, things get screwed up.'

'Things get screwed up when we do plan. Trust me.'

'I know I told you what that meant. Hey, it's almost 5:30. Maybe they went home already.'

'Come on, don't get chicken on me now. You've been amazing today. Let's do this so we can fix Nathan.'

Mara huffed and hopped out after Duke.

The brothers were bickering as usual when they walked in, which immediately put Audrey on edge.

Conversely, it soothed Mara, and in a tidal wave of memory and emotion, she knew.

'I remember this. I know what to do.'

Mara took a deep breath, looking between the strange, yet completely familiar brothers. She walked up to Vince, taking his hand and pulling him up. He looked utterly bewildered. She pulled him away from the desk, then put one hand on his shoulder, still holding his other hand- a dance position.

Then she opened her mouth and sang.

"Somewhere, beyond the sea

Somewhere waiting for me

My lover stands on golden sands

and watches the ships that go sailing.

Somewhere, beyond the sea

She's there watching for me

If I could fly like birds on high

Then straight to her arms

I'd go sailing

It's far beyond the stars

It's near beyond the moon

I know beyond a doubt

My heart will lead me there soon

We'll meet beyond the shore

We'll kiss just as before

Happy we'll be beyond the sea

And never again I'll go sailing"

Vince had fallen right into the past, and he moved automatically, dancing Mara around the room, only stopping when Mara stopped singing and hugged him, trying not to cry.

Everyone was silent, Vince and Dave staring at her with wide eyes.

"Sarah?" Vince asked, barely above a whisper.

Mara let go and moved closer to Dave until she was right next to their desks, the window behind her making her blonde hair glow like a halo.

She rolled Dave's chair back, perching carefully on his good leg, cautious not to hurt him.

She held out her left wrist- blank- and started singing again.

"Jeremiah was a bullfrog, was a good friend of mine

I never understood a single word he said

But I helped him drink his wine

And he always had some mighty fine wine

Singin'

Joy to the world

All the boys and girls

Joy to the fishes in the deep blue sea

Joy to you and me."

Dave's eyes were like saucers, a brilliant smile on his face as he sang with her, wrapping his arms around her.

"If I were the king of the world

Tell you what I'd do

I'd throw away the cars and the bars and the war

and make sweet love to you

Joy to the world

All the boys and girls

Joy to the fishes in the deep blue sea

Joy to you and me

You know I love the ladies

Love to have my fun

I'm a high life flyer and a rainbow rider

A straight shootin' son-of-a-gun

I said a straight shootin' son-of-a-gun"

As they sang the chorus, she let the Maze flare to life on her wrist, and for perhaps the first time ever, someone had finally, finally rendered the Teagues brothers speechless. For a moment, anyway.

"Lucy?" Dave asked.

She touched her forehead to his. "Both. Neither. Will you listen to me before you do anything? And don't think I don't remember where you keep that gun, Vincent." She stood and strode purposefully to the shelves on the wall, moving the exact book that had been here when she'd been Lucy and reaching behind to pull out a small, worn photo album.

She opened it carefully and smiled. "You didn't forget."

"Of course not." Vince rumbled. His voice made her think of thunder and rainstorms, shelter and protection, sharing secrets over brandy, and the heartbroken tears of a mother without her baby, and she reached out to stroke his face, leaning in to gently kiss the man he'd been, the man she remembered. Then she turned to Dave, resting her hand on his cheek and kissing him, too. Nothing graphic, but the setting felt too intimate for outsiders.

"Thank you for everything. I'm sorry I had to leave. I know how hard you tried, and I loved you too. Thanks for getting James to the Barn for me."

She was smiling, but tears rolled down her cheeks. "It's time to show Nathan and Duke. Past time. But I'm glad you waited for me."

"Who are you?" Vince breathed.

She knelt next to the desks, putting the photo album down so she could take their hands. She carefully folded the fingers on her broken hand as far as possible into Dave's, her left in Vince's.

"I'm all of them. My name is Mara. Please, don't move. Just listen. If you're worried, call Dwight. I'll explain everything in a minute. I have to show them this first. Okay? Then we'll talk.

"Actually," she said thoughtfully, "you might want to call Dwight sooner rather than later. I have a feeling he might get drunk."

She stood, taking the book, and brought it to her boys.

"Would you like to see our son, Nathan?"

"There are pictures?" His eyes were bright, either from excitement or tears, and she nodded.

"The boys studied photography. I asked June Cogan to send some every so often as he grew. I always... she always... wanted to find a way back. I know I'm not exactly her, but I remember everything."

She opened the first page. An old photograph of Sarah, bright red hair and secretive smile, greeted them. Her body was sideways, delicate hand on her swollen belly. Nathan, Duke and Audrey were fascinated, and Mara reminded herself that they'd never seen these, and that it was irrational to feel jealous.

That small, doubting part of her reached for Duke's hand, placing it on her barely-there bump.

She continued to flip pages slowly, as Duke moved behind her to watch over her shoulder as he held her. They stood against Nathan, all managing to touch as they watched.

Page by page- every two weeks, Mara recalled- there was another picture of her and her growing abdomen. There were a few candid shots mixed in- her laughing with Dave, one where she was eating pie straight from the tin that she obviously hadn't expected.

Then, pictures of James. Many of him as a newborn, before Sarah had chosen the Cogan's, before she had to return to the Barn. Then the pictures spaced out. Crawling to walking, running to playing. Games, dances, even wedding pictures. There was paper with his footprints from his birth, and his original birth certificate.

Then came pictures of Lucy. Playing cards with Vince, dancing with Dave. Even three pictures of Lucy with their son, from the brief time they'd had together before James was killed and moved into the Barn. A few photos of her with little Duke. One with Duke and Nathan both.

Nathan pored over every picture, pointing out parts that looked like him, parts like Mara. Nathan had the sweetest smile on his face, though his eyes were definitely red.

"He has your nose and eyes, Mara."

Her throat went tight.

'Did he just say what I think he did?'

'Yes, he did. He knows you're Sarah.'

'How? I didn't tell him.'

'He can be a little slow on the uptake, but he has good instincts, Mara.'

"Why did you two lie? Why not just tell Audrey immediately?" He asked the older pair.

"Time travel has risks, Nathan. If we'd told you earlier you might not have made the same decisions. Sarah begged me." Vince shrugged. "I'd have done anything for her."

"Oh, Vince. I know you would have. It's one of the reasons I trusted you both. I'm sorry I caused your divorce. I told you both that I didn't want you to suffer because of me, but I know I was selfish, always taking up your time, having you work with me. I was greedy. I'm sorry, I never wanted to hurt either of you."

She left Nathan studying the pictures, squeezing Duke's hand as she went to the brothers.

"Did you call Dwight?" she asked, perching on the edge of the desk.

"He says you cured him. But how? You never could before."

"Not me, we. Duke was the missing piece, the catalyst. What I did to him... I know what you must think of me, but it was necessary. He was dying, and already so close to perfecting his gift. Working with Duke, we can erase every damaged gift, even regift people who want to."

"How do we know we can trust you?" Dave asked.

Mara sighed, shaking her head. "Trust me? Dave, you know that's the one thing I never asked you to do. You remember that natural royal flush Vince got the time we played strip poker? He'd been hiding that entire hand in his pocket for a solid week waiting for you to start a game. I started calling him the King of Clubs after that."

Dave gasped, outraged. Mara heard Nathan and Duke coughing.

"You cheat! I knew there was something wrong there!"

"You said you'd never tell!" Vince huffed at her.

"And I never did. But, you ask a question, you get an answer. Besides, you used it on me, not Dave, so I really don't understand the fuss." She heard Duke coughing, saw Nathan patting his back with an amused expression.

"We have a few things to discuss, gentlemen. Can we table the fight for the next game?"

"You're staying?"

"Vince, the Barn is gone. There's nowhere for me to go. But if you mean me- Mara- Audrey is in charge here. I'm here because she lets me be."

"Damn it, Mara, don't you start that shit again."

"Hush, Duke. It's true. I didn't say anything about that, so stop obsessing." Mara chided.

She continued on before she could be interrupted again.

"Dave, I want to talk about you. I know you don't remember much about where we come from- enough not to want to go back, but not much more. I don't know your family or anything, but I remember your story. You fell- or were pushed- into the Void when you were little. About the same time as the Child of Ruin... um, Jennifer did. You got out faster though, which is why you're older."

Mara told her story again. She was getting tired of it, really. But she needed to do this.

'Hello, my name is Mara. I'm a quasi-immortal from an alternate dimension and I'm trying to make amends for things I didn't even do to you. I'm a gemini and I like long walks in the rain and pina coladas.'

When she was done, she took a moment to get her head straight.

"Vince, I need you and Dwight to keep the Guard calm. I will heal everyone I can, but there won't be any killing, of me or anyone else. William is the enemy now, do you understand me?"

"Oh, they don't listen to me anymore. I'm a useless old man."

"Vincent Elliott Teagues! You may be able to lie to everybody else, but don't you try that garbage with me. I know more about you than anyone. You need to put the order out. Help Dwight get the really bad cases to me as soon as possible. I'll be able to sense as he gets closer, but I don't know how long it'll take. Now- are you with me, gentlemen?"

Eventually they nodded. Mara smiled as she hopped off the desk, moving quickly to kiss both their cheeks before she went to stand with her boys.

"If it makes you feel better, Dave keeps 2 aces in his left pocket at all times. They're still there, aren't they, Davey?"

She left smiling with her new boys as her old boys started bickering behind her.