*dodges rotten fruit thrown by what few readers are left* Sorry, sorry! Life's been such hell lately with protesting and moderating sites, managing information…anyways, I'm sorry. I can't say I'll be back on a set schedule but I'm definitely gonna try. As a peace offering there's a lemon at the end of this chap. Enjoy.
And if you get the chance – look up Occupy Wall Street and what it REALLY stands for – not the shit you hear on television…in fact, turn that damn thing off. It's not worth it, really.
Peace ~ tavi
~ o ~ O ~ o ~
Yugi fiddled idly with the reed that he had been using to affix his signature to the paperwork before him, thoughts concerning his new Egyptian slave running repeatedly through his head, refusing to let him be, even with everything else currently crowding his mind. Several days had passed by with barely a word spoken between the two of them – and yet somehow they always ended up facing the early rays of Re together, curled up next to each other on the large, comfortable bed.
It was a most foreign feeling, opening his eyes to the early morning light, only to find himself snuggled up close, safe in his captor's warm embrace, the arrogant Egyptian monarch's presence an annoying – and yet slightly comforting – consistency despite their untenable situation.
A wary sort of armed truce had settled over them from that first day of confrontation, each side unwilling to attempt a breach of the invisible barrier that had sprung up between them, and it seemed to Yugi as though their time together was nothing more than a farce. But for that first few moments, during the bleary haze that existed between the land of dreams and the waking world, Yugi would almost hold out hope that his world had righted itself and they had found their way back to each other.
But, even after waking thusly, he would eventually come to realize – as he shook off the fuzziness of his semi-coherent thoughts – that the barrier still existed, that their troubles had not vanished as he had so ofttimes wished for them to do.
Amethyst eyes teared up slightly, and Yugi tried to shove the thoughts away only to fail as they ricocheted right back around again, this time focusing on the heavy tension that seemed to settle on the air whenever the two of them found themselves in the same room at the same time. There were so many instances where one or the other of them would open their mouth in an attempt to say something, only to think better of it and walk away.
Why does it have to be this way? He thought miserably. Why did it seem as though every time he opened his mouth around his former lover he always ended up saying something he didn't mean? But it wasn't as if he could just give in to the Pharaoh's designs, he had done that once before, only for the man to turn on him without even the slightest provocation. Just like his father...just like everyone else.
Yugi lowered his eyes, defeated. Oh gods, what he wouldn't give for things to go back to the way they were before...before what? What had happened between them? Did I do something wrong? Again? It had to be my fault, right...?
Frustrated with the way his harried thoughts seemed to circle back around to that fateful day like vultures hovering over their mortally wounded prey, Yugi turned his solemn gaze to the window, oblivious to the piles of paperwork that lay scattered on the desk between himself, Ryou, Jou and Malik.
Someone help me...please...he pleaded mentally, wondering momentarily just to whom, or what, it was he was praying, and what he was praying for – his country, or his own selfish needs? They both needed it – overwhelmingly so.
The meeting with the nobles had gone just as he had expected, and their many demands had taken a toll on what little free time he, and the others, had. The demands of one noble in particular. But they needed to compromise in order for the country to run without the help of the Egyptians, so once again the group found themselves pouring over paperwork, searching for ways to appease not only those nobles but the many working people that made up the majority of their country's populace. Not that they were getting anywhere with the endeavor.
Jou smothered another wide yawn from the seat beside him, the second one in as many minutes, casting a weary eye at the darkening sky outside. It was getting late, and they were getting nowhere. Again. "Yugi...Yugi...hey Yugi?"
"Huh?" Yugi's head snapped around to give him a sheepish look. "Sorry Jou...got distracted for a minute. What do you need?"
Jou gave a sigh. "I was just wondering if you wanted to continue – "
Just then the doors opened to admit another of their members, this one with a rather large, extended stomach despite the slenderness of her figure. "I kinda figured you guys would still be here." Anzu groaned as she kicked the door shut behind her. Waddling into the room balancing a tray of meats and cheeses in one hand and holding a pitcher of beer in the other, she admonished her friends with a roll of her eyes. "You all really need to rest every once in a while. You work too hard."
Ryou glanced up at her with a long, drawn out yawn, as Jou scrubbed at his face tiredly.
"There's too much to do right now to get this country up and running on its own." Yugi replied with a sigh, turning his face back to the paperwork that looked as though it had doubled in size since they had first sat down to work through it.
Anzu gave an unladylike snort as she set her burden down on the table, rubbing at her pregnant stomach with a groan. "Yeah, well, maybe you ought to make use of what the gods have presented you with." She responded, jerking a thumb over her shoulder at the four rather bored-looking, yet entirely too silent Egyptians lounging sullenly in the corner of the chamber. "For gods' sakes Yugi, they ought to be worth more than just giving those in the palace something to gossip over."
Yugi's head shot up and he glanced at her warily. "What do you mean, Anzu?"
She shifted her weight from one leg to the other, uncomfortable with his sudden scrutiny. "Well...they're still trying to figure out who he is, for one. Rumor has it that he's the Pharaoh, which is true...but still, I thought you didn't want anyone knowing that...I mean it's not common thinking right now, cause most people are still under the impression that he's a gift from a foreign land, but apparently one of the palace guards is of Egyptian blood and he almost freaked when he saw him wandering the gardens alone. Veiled or not, he's causing all sorts of conjecture."
Her words caught the attention of the entire chamber, and even the Egyptians made their way over to be a part of the conversation, their expressions concerned – Atemu's especially since he had earlier argued against wearing the accursed veil while confined in the chamber with those who already knew his identity.
The Pharaoh ground his teeth, eyes flicking towards Yugi regretfully. This was not supposed to happen. No one was meant to recognize any of them. Atemu cursed his easily identifiable features with a vengeance, knowing full well that his eyes were very distinctive in terms of color as well as shape, and that all it took was for one person to look past the veil for him to be recognized.
"Oh shit." Jou swore virulently, Ryou mimicking his words in a softer tone – his head in his hands.
Yugi only dropped his head onto the desk, slamming it against the papers twice for good measure. And then he turned an evil eye on the one responsible for this newest upset, his hands fisted in his hair. "You! Arg...I swear...can you not see how much of a disturbance your presence has created? Why can't you...just go away?"
And then he buried his head in his hands, the need to cry almost overwhelming. Oh gods...did I just...? What is wrong with me? Someone help me...please...
"I am sorry, little one. I...if you would only hear me out..." Atemu replied in a soft voice, his arms folded over his chest as he averted his gaze from his young lover's upset. "This is all I ask of you before I..." He trailed off into silence, uncertain of what he had meant to say.
"It told you not to call...! Just...just forget it..." Frustrated at himself, as well as his former lover, and not in the mood to hear whatever the Pharaoh had to say on any subject, Yugi turned his head, signaling an end to the conversation, leaning over to Ryou to ask his opinion on the plan to extend a measure of credit to certain nobles in exchange for their allegiance. I don't care what he has to say I just want him to...to leave...please...
Anzu merely sighed when none of her friends seemed to about pay heed to her earlier suggestion. It was past the time for subtlety. "Hey, look guys, it's well past the dinner hour and I think you need to call it a night. You keep working yourselves to death and there'll be no one here to govern this country."
But all that comment gained was four wide-eyed looks and a couple of yawns. Shaking her head sadly, Anzu waddled uncomfortably back towards the exit. Well, at least she could tell Honda she had tried. Her new husband was nearly as worried as she was. As she approached the doors, Marik bowed low before her, coming to her aid by opening the door.
"My lady."
She gave the blonde a tremulous smile as she made her way out of the room, shaking her head again at the stubbornness of her friends.
The Hyksos court worked diligently for the next couple of moments, the only sounds in the chamber that of shuffling papyrus, as documents were shifted around the table. Atemu gave a sidelong glance over at Seto to find that his high priest was nearly asleep on his feet, briefly noting that the same held true for Bakura and Marik. This could not go on for much longer, everyone was exhausted.
He could only imagine how drained his little one was at the moment. The younger royal was always fighting sleep each night until he was completely spent and could not escape the call of his dreams. And even then he would toss and turn in the massive bed, fidgeting as he searched for a comfortable position. It was to the point where the boy wouldn't rest peacefully until Atemu's arms were wrapped around him.
And then the younger royal would scramble quickly out of bed once Re's light filtered into the room, only to do it all over again, working himself into that same exhausted state every day. The frustrated Egyptian monarch glanced over at his defiant consort. Well, if the little one would not put an end to it then he would.
"Litt – your Highness..." Atemu cleared his throat when Yugi's haggard gaze shot towards him in irritation. "'Tis time for you to rest. This can keep for a couple of hours. Everyone is exhausted; you need to call it a night."
The group at the table collectively sat back in their chairs, waiting to see their sovereign's reaction to that bit of advice. Jou yawned once, hiding it behind his hand when Yugi's gaze happened to wander in his direction. The young Hyksos monarch's attention stayed with the blonde for a moment longer before he was satisfied that the other was just as committed to finishing their work as he was, and without a word he turned his attention back to the papyrus held in his hand.
After being thoroughly ignored Atemu stalked towards the stubborn Hyksos royal, fully prepared to take matters into his own hands. "I do believe it is time to retire for the night, your Highness." He stressed the title, staring down into Yugi's shadowed eyes.
But once again Yugi only waved him off, too caught up in doing whatever he had to do in order to avoid going back to his chambers, for reasons that were completely obvious to everyone in the room, but that no one dared to speak aloud.
After a few more moments of being totally ignored Atemu proceeded to drag the stubborn young royal from his chair, despite his protests, and toss him over his shoulder, bidding a curt good night to the others in the room as they stared after him with their mouths open. He, then, carted a fuming Yugi from the chamber, ignoring the small fists pounding on his still tender back.
He refused to let his consort work himself into his grave. If the boy didn't have enough sense to know when to rest then it was up to him to make certain that he realized it.
The irate Egyptian monarch carried his slight burden through the halls and into the chamber that they now shared, depositing him none-too-gently on the bed. "That is enough of that, little one. I refuse to watch you push yourself beyond the limits of your body's capabilities. I care not if you listen to me, but you do need to listen to yourself."
Yugi had scrambled from the bed the moment his captor withdrew his hands, skirting his powerful tormentor with a silent glare as he took up his nightly position beside the window, gazing up at the stars despondently. His thoughts scattered in the wake of this newest insult before coming right back around to pick at the questions of before. What had happened to them?
Tears of self loathing filled his eyes and he wiped them away, keeping them hidden from the keen scarlet gaze of his servant/spouse. Why was his life always out of his control? All it would take was a couple of kind words from his former lover and he wouldn't be able to resist the pull that was Atemu. He knew this, most likely the Pharaoh knew it as well. But he couldn't. He'd never forgive himself if he were to do that.
Oh gods...I am so weak against him...
Why couldn't his life be simple? He had never asked for a life of riches, a life of luxury, such as he now had. All he had ever wanted was for someone to care for him – with all of his flaws, all of his shortcomings. Why was that so hard to achieve? His whole life was in shambles, and he couldn't think of a single way out. He was now bound to this man, the most powerful person on the earth, quite possibly for the rest of eternity.
What do I do now...? He asked his question of the stars.
Atemu studied his smaller lover's defeated profile from the shadows of the chamber. The little one held himself so rigid, so completely motionless, that it broke his heart to know that he was the cause of his anguish. And he could think of nothing to say in his defense. He had repeatedly berated himself for his lapse in reason, for his drunken blunders, but nothing could change the past.
If only he would have asked, instead of assuming. But he hadn't, and now they had come to this impasse. He could not overcome the shield that his little one had built up in the wake of his violent mistakes.
Without thinking of the consequences Atemu stepped up behind his smaller lover's trembling form, so close that he could practically hear the fierce pounding of the boy's heart in his chest, his downcast scarlet gaze full of regret and sorrow for all the suffering that he had caused his only love, this beautiful boy he had betrayed so thoughtlessly.
He was so close...so close. A hesitant hand came up, froze, and then lowered itself to his side again, as Atemu averted his eyes. He would not touch the little one in such an intimate fashion. He had no right, not after what he had done. He was unworthy of such a beautiful, trusting being.
Yugi, oblivious to the act, even though he could feel the warmth of his captor's breath upon his ear, cast his eyes skyward, searching for the reason that his heart still hammered in his chest every time the exotic Egyptian royal so much as glanced his way. Someone...please...help me...
The trembling Hyksos king closed his eyes, the silent plea ringing forcefully through his mind. And then amethyst eyes snapped open wide as he realized to whom it was he had been praying all this time. It wasn't his gods that held his hope for the future, it was his husband, this man standing so silently behind him, offering him solace and comfort if he only had the courage to accept it.
Nothing like his father at all, who never would have offered such a thing, nor his grandfather who tried to protect him from everything whether he needed it or not. No, what his lover was offering was his support, the chance to have someone beside him through life's inevitable trials, to help compensate for his own weaknesses, and perhaps, in time, to receive the same from him.
A lone teardrop coursed down his face as he turned his eyes back to the stars again. "What...what happened to us...?" He queried softly, his voice quivering in the shadows of the chamber.
Atemu cringed at the heartbroken whisper. This was his fault, and he would do whatever it took to make amends, to heal the hurt he had dealt his beautiful little lover. Even if the boy could not find it within himself to forgive him he had to do this. His eyes welled up with tears, the tears that he had never been able to shed until this one small, graceful being had entered – and fled – his life.
"I happened to us, little one...And I am so sorry for the wrongs that I have done you..."
Yugi swallowed thickly, forcing himself not to turn around and launch into his lover's arms. As badly as he wanted to do just that he still had one more question. One that had never been answered, one that had haunted his thoughts from the moment Atemu had entered the chamber with the intentions of humiliating him and casting him aside. "Why...?"
The quietly spoken word rang out through the silence of the chamber, and a tear escaped the confines of Atemu's lashes to roll, unchecked, down his cheek. "I-I...paid heed to the accusations of a lying jackal...and assumed that you played me false...'tis no excuse, little one...I do not have one – "
Yugi whirled around, his tears now wholly visible as they trailed down his face. "I would never have played you false! Who would say that? Katara?How could you believe that of me?"
The floodgates opened and Atemu was unable to stop the flow of wetness from his eyes as he practically begged for his lover to understand even a part of his reasoning – even though he barely understood it himself. "No! I would never have listened to that harpy...it was bad enough...his name was Dartz, little one...someone who has been in your presence while your father was in power...he swore that he had taken you long before...before we were together...and I –" The Pharaoh hung his head, unable to continue.
Yugi stumbled wordlessly away from Atemu, his hand flying to his mouth as he fought to keep the bile from rising into his throat. Dartz! He recognized that name now, placing it right along with the face of his most hated enemy. It was that man, his father's favorite commander, the one he had seen during his time in the Egyptian palace.
The Hyksos royal dropped to his knees, his arm wrapped protectively around his chest as he doubled over, wounded eyes staring at Atemu, not judging, but questioning. Searching for the reason that his illustrious lover had taken the word of some unknown factor without ever consulting him.
And the Egyptian monarch couldn't take it, the silent condemnation of his little one's tearful gaze. The worst part of it was he knew he had no excuse. He had believed Dartz's claim that Yugi had been dishonest when the Hyksos commander himself had been revealed as a traitor not moments before.
He had allowed his drunken jealousy to overtake his reason, and refused to give Yugi even the slightest chance to explain himself. He had allowed his rage to overcome him and Yugi had suffered – was still suffering for it. The fault was entirely his own.
Atemu dropped to his knees as well, catching the smaller royal up as he tried to retreat. For better or for worse it was time to end this and know if he still stood a chance with the one and only person who had always accepted him for who he truly was.
"I am sorry...gods little one...if I could take back my words...my actions of that night do you not think that I would do so? I regret my thirst for the medicine...that first sip of wine that led to the entire sordid affair...I was so jealous...I lost my...I am so sorry...I never meant to...I love you...I am sorry..."
Yugi thrashed around in his embrace, feeling – if it were even possible – even lower than he had previously. Part of this misunderstanding had been his fault. He could have stopped the entire affair before it had even began. He had known of that man's presence in his lover's court, but due to the unfortunate circumstances of Pegasus's involvement he had forgotten Dartz completely.
How could he have forgotten such a disastrous detail? How could he have forgotten about the man who had tormented him and his friends every time that he came across them? And the Pharaoh had believed him? Had believed someone who was a proven traitor, to Egypt as well as Hyskos? To the point where he hadn't even tried to confirm whether the rumor was true. Yugi could have told him the truth in an instant, if he'd bothered to ask, then none of this would have happened. But instead, Atemu had...
I loved him. I trusted him. I told him things I'd never told anyone. I thought, or perhaps hoped, that he might feel the same about me, even if only a little. Then again, all those times I whispered my love to him, I never gave him the chance to reply. He never actually said that he trusted me, but he must have trusted me a little to be alone with me, without his guards in the room, but still...after everything we shared together, did he truly trust me so little, that his trust could be lost so easily, at the first false rumors of deception?
Atemu only held tighter to his smaller lover's trembling form. There was nothing more he could say, nothing more he could do without causing further harm to this beautiful being he had all but destroyed. The words I'm sorry rolled off his tongue over and over again as he sought for ways to calm the struggling youth. It broke his heart to hear his lover's tearful sobs, his pleas to understand something that had no reason.
Finally, weary of the fighting, losing himself to the need to feel his lover's arms wrapped around him, Yugi calmed, his fingers clutching tightly at the vest that the other was wearing. What was he supposed to say to that? How was he supposed to react to the notion that his former lover was so paranoid that he latched on to any excuse to vilify him?
Dartz may have fed this fear, but who had caused this paranoia in the first place? Who did he have to thank for that? And why did it matter so much to him in the first place? Did he still...?
After catching his breath Yugi murmured tearfully. "I...I loved you..."
Atemu nearly choked on his regret. "You...loved me? As in you...don't anymore..." He turned the younger monarch's face to his, both of them teary-eyed, and immersed himself in the pain his little one was feeling. "What about now, little one? What about today? Can you tell me that you do not feel the same as you did then?"
Yugi bit his lip, his eyes shying away from the intensity of the other's tearful scarlet gaze. "I...don't...know...I don't trust you...anymore...you believed me to be a liar, even when you had no proof...I still remember what you did, even if you don't remember, and...I can't just forget."
Atemu's jaw dropped, another tear slipping down his cheek and he leaned in to listen as his lover took in a breath to speak.
Yugi squeezed his eyes shut and whispered, "You hurt me, held me down and used my body like my father used that captive girl...I can't bring myself...to call it rape since I initiated it...but it was so...You said if I ever used your name again that you would kill me. You struck me...looked at me with such hate...such disgust...the very way my father used to. Oh gods...I ran from you just as I used to run from him...but he never hurt me nearly as much as you have."
The smaller monarch gave a tearful hiccup, his grip tightening in the folds of the vest that Atemu was wearing as he continued his tale. "And all this time, I've been wondering what I did wrong, trying to think of anything I could have done to deserve what you did, and I couldn't find an explanation for your behavior. And now, you tell me that I'm not to blame; that this is your fault, for not trusting me. That may be true, the fault may be yours but...the fact remains: you didn't trust me."
Atemu gritted his teeth as he heard Yugi's account of that dreadful night. He had forgotten some of the details, and listening to Yugi describe what he'd said, the things he'd made his lover feel, was almost more than he could bear. But he didn't interrupt; he knew he needed to understand, to be accused directly by the one he'd wronged, to know the full account of his crime and accept Yugi's judgment.
"I understand..." Atemu nodded, swallowing thickly. What if the little one still held those feelings, the ones of love as well as those of mistrust? What if they were locked deep behind the words he couldn't bring himself to say? Did he dare hold on to hope for their future?
He needed to mend this before it was too late for the both of them. Somehow. Another tear escaped the confines of his lashes, and his voice broke as he whispered. "I still love you, little one...I always have...I did not know how to say it...how to express the depths of my feelings for you from the moment you walked into my life. I do not know how to convince you how deeply I regret what I did to you, and why...and I am sorry for that as well...it is you who makes me what I am meant to be...and I am so lost without you..."
Yugi's tear-stained eyes widened, and he started in Atemu's embrace to glance up at him uncertainly. "Me? What do I have to do with who you're supposed to be?"
Atemu chuckled sadly, gently wiping the moisture from the smaller monarch's tear-drenched face. "You are the one who makes me a better person. I can do anything and it is okay. I can smile and you would not take it the wrong way, nor think me weak. I can be wrong...and up until that night...know that you would forgive me my mistakes...I have found that I still retain the ability to cry...obviously...and that even I need ask forgiveness when I am wrong...you let me be the person I am supposed to be and not the god that I am known as...you are...everything I have ever needed...and I love you so much...please don't...don't forsake me..."
Yugi closed his eyes as more tears streamed down his face. "I...I don't..."
Atemu pulled the smaller royal further into his embrace, vowing then and there to never, ever let anything come between them again should he be given this second chance. "Let us try again, little one...we have come too far to just...give up...please..."
"I'm afraid...I can't go through this...oh gods, Pharaoh...I'm so scared..." Yugi admitted haltingly, his grip tightening in the fabric of his lover's clothes. "I don't want to be...alone...but I'm so scared..."
"My name is Atemu, little one..." Atemu shushed him with a gentle kiss to his porcelain cheek, the spark of hope that had bloomed in his chest during their first words now beginning to burn brighter. He had lost what was left of his pride during this encounter, but that mattered not one bit.
What mattered was that his little one was still allowing himself to be held despite his fears, allowing him to comfort him. What was his pride, after all, if it kept him from sharing in Yugi's life? What was his dignity, in the face of the love and acceptance that Yugi had once given him, and might give him again?
And what was his life, that he would want to live it without his love's presence?
Feeling so vulnerable, and out of his element, he pressed another heartfelt kiss to the boy's brow. "There is nothing to fear, my beautiful little one...I am here...for the rest of my life I shall be beside you and protect you from whatever it is that you fear so...even if it is me...I will not disappoint you again, Yugi...I swear...for all my life I am yours...if you will have me..."
The tears were coming faster now, and Yugi ducked his head to hide them, but Atemu had other plans as he reached out to take the smaller royal's chin into his hand, forcing their eyes to meet.
"I love you...my beautiful little one...you have held my heart in your hand from the moment I met you. And that day...the day we were bonded...I know I hurt you – and for that I am sorry as well – I was so proud of you. You were so scared, and yet you held onto that defiant spark that I fell in love with...I know it is too early to expect your forgiveness and I know now that perhaps I should not even have asked for it so soon, without hearing from your own lips what I have done...but please...allow me this chance to try...I miss having you beside me...I need you.." he trailed off, choking on his emotions, unable to keep from giving in to the urge to break down completely.
Having never known the imposing Egyptian monarch to lose even the smallest bit of his compose before Yugi could only watch as Atemu broke, his heart unable to take the strain of seeing his lover collapse against him. Never in this lifetime could he have imagined something to send the Pharaoh to his knees in tears.
To see his powerful lover in such a vulnerable state reminded Yugi of the fact that he was human, and that he too made mistakes. The smaller royal closed his eyes tightly against the pain. They had been so good together...so perfect. Was it right to let the lies of one despicable man come between them?
The two of them held each other, motionless in the shaft of pale moonlight that reflected in from the window, their grief too strong to be denied. And Yugi began to realize that the world was just a little more right, a little more stable when they were together. It was the moment of truth. He could continue living this half life that he had been for the past season, or he could admit his mistakes and acknowledge that his lover was trying to make amends for his.
Did he have the courage to accept the Pharaoh's apology?
"I...uh..." Yugi licked his lips to wet them. "Its too...I want to forgive you, but what you did is still so...it's the last memory I have of you, before all of this...I want...I...can you take away these nightmares...please..I don't...I don't...maybe we can start over...you know, get to know each other...a little..."
Atemu sucked in a startled breath, scarcely believing his ears, taking Yugi's face back in his hands to study his tearful expression. "You wish for me to – "
"All I can remember are your hurtful words...your expression of loathing when you denied me!" He cried, curling into Atemu's chest fearful of his reaction. "I can't see you, I can't even think of you without that running through my head over and over again. That's why I wanted you to leave, so that maybe, given enough time I'd be able to forget how much you hurt me. But having you here, so close by... ...it's with me every waking minute! Oh gods...it hurts!"
"Shh, little one...I shall do whatever you desire of me. I am sorry..." Atemu drew the smaller royal into his arms, holding him tenderly.
After a few moments where they both relished in the feel of each other's embrace Atemu lifted Yugi into his arms and carried him over to the bed, gently laying him down on its softness.
He pulled his lover's shivering form into a light embrace, whispering quietly. "Please, do not fear me...I could never stand this fear, knowing that I am the cause. Never again shall I take you for granted...you are so beautiful...so caring...I love you, little one."
He drew back slightly, looking into Yugi's eyes. "When I hurt you, I was consumed with jealousy and rage, and such feelings scarcely leave room for even the strongest love. Make no mistake little one, even when I thought you had betrayed me, I loved you with every beat of my shattered heart. When I thought I would never see you again, I found even the idea of Ammit's hell preferable to living without you in my life. And when I told you I would enjoy making your life miserable, it was the blackest blasphemy I have ever uttered. Please...let me replace those shameful memories with ones of my true feelings, and know that I shall never hurt you in such a way again."
"Please...I need you." Yugi offered himself shakily up to the god above him, knowing in his heart that this was where he belonged. He still wasn't quite up to forgiving his powerful lover for that terrifying night, but he couldn't withhold himself from the other's treasured touch any longer. He needed this reassurance that he was still wanted, even after everything that had happened between them.
Atemu forcefully reined in his body's immediate response to those words. He had needed Yugi so desperately, for so long, he had to forcefully resist the urge to take him too quickly. He had to remind himself that Yugi was the one who had been wronged, and he needed reassurance from Atemu that he was indeed worthy of his love, that Yugi's forgiveness was something Atemu was willing to wait — and fight — for.
He needed tenderness, gentleness and words of love, not frenzied passion. He needed to know that Atemu would never again deny him the comfort, or the pleasure, that they both needed.
With infinite care Atemu stripped the clothes from his smaller lover, refusing to relinquish his hold on the boy for even a moment. As he revealed his lover's petite, flawless form he peppered the moonlit, oh-so-soft skin with kisses and gentle caresses, keeping every movement slow and even, cherishing the time they had together as if it was to be their last.
It was his fullest intention to drive his new consort wild with pleasure before they even joined, to replace those horrifying memories with something sweet, something that more resembled what had been – and could still be – their love for each other.
Yugi shuddered uncontrollably, closing his eyes tightly as his body was revealed to his formidable lover's gaze. And then he was swept up into a powerful kiss that drew his misgivings from his mind, leaving behind a craving for more of what the Pharaoh was promising to him. His breath caught in his throat as those pliant lips left his only to mark a path down his throat, past his collar bone, and on down his chest. A moan of approval bubbled over when those lips wrapped around his nipple, suckling gently.
"Pharaoh..." he gasped, his hands fisting into tightly beaded hair, that underneath the finery was not unlike his own, when a pair of hands clamped around his waist in a vise-like grip. A hot tongue branded him from chest to stomach, and he squirmed against the pleasurable sensations.
Atemu looked up from where he was working the boy over with his tongue. "My name is Atemu, little one. You are welcome to use it." And then he returned to that adorable indentation in his lover's stomach, biting down gently to mark him before soothing over the redness with his tongue.
His little one responded so well to even the slightest touch, and he trembled with the need to have to boy squirming beneath him. With a final kiss to the porcelain skin he again shoved his own needs to the back of his mind and continued on a downward path. His needs would be met later, if they got that far. For now he wanted to please this elegant beauty writhing beneath his ministrations. To bind Yugi to him with a physical need until they could sort out their troubles.
Atemu gave a fleeting kiss to the inside of his lover's quivering thigh, grimacing as his hair was almost ripped from his scalp. "Relax little one..."
"Uh...Pha – Atemu...oh..." Yugi's husky voice came to him from above, full of wonder.
The Hyksos royal closed his eyes reveling in the pleasurable sensations his lover was causing. Even in their earlier encounters he had never felt so loved, so needed. The way his lover was handling his body, tending to his pleasure without a care for his own. It was confusing, as he was normally the one to try his best to please the Pharaoh, not the other way around.
Atemu only chuckled, returning to his play. He kissed the sensitive skin again, licking a path upward until he got to his destination. He was going to pleasure the boy until he couldn't talk – or walk. An evil grin encompassed his features as he nipped at the pulsing shaft in front of his face. Yugi came off the bed with a screech and he grabbed a hold of the boy's hips, pinning him to the mattress. And then he engulfed the rigid shaft in one motion, pleased with the scream that left the other's lips.
Once he was able, he removed a hand from his lover's hip, to search the bedside table for something he could use to make this experience even more fulfilling. His fingers touched something and he made a grab for it. A quick glance told him that it was a bottle of oil that his little one used during his morning ablutions and he tipped it to the side, allowing the liquid into his hand, never once neglecting to attend to his lover's needs. He set the piece back on the table and rubbed the scented oil into his fingers.
And then he hoisted the younger royal's slender legs onto his shoulders, placing a single, slick finger at the entrance to his body. Yugi stiffened below him, feeling that pressure and knowing what was soon to follow, relieved at the sign that this time Atemu was going to do things right.
Soon afterward Atemu breached the guarded opening, reveling in the heat that surrounded him. A piercing cry echoed around the chamber as he searched the tight channel for that spot that would drive his lover absolutely crazy with pleasure. Another cry came quickly on the heels of the first one and Atemu smirked around the pulsing flesh in his mouth. Knowing that he had found the spot Atemu pushed a second finger in alongside the first, all the while working his lover over with his tongue.
Yugi gasped as fireworks went off behind his eyes, those talented digits searching for and finding that one spot that sent sparks of electricity shooting through his body. He panted, unable to move, his head thrashing from side to side as his lover worked him over with his mouth, as well as his hand. He had never imagined so much pleasure. And the heat, oh gods, the heat was almost unbearable. He wanted to drive into that warmth full force, but settled for fisting his hands in his lover's hair, urging him on.
"Oh gods...please...I can't..."
Understanding that the other was close Atemu pushed him over the edge with a gentle nip, grinning as Yugi came with a loud cry. While Yugi was still twitching in the afterglow he slid up next to him, claiming his mouth in a searing kiss as he pulled their bodies together. The smaller royal could feel the unrelieved evidence of his lover's desire. And suddenly he wanted nothing more than for the powerful Pharaoh to claim the rest of him.
Atemu pulled out of the kiss, using a generous amount of oil to coat his length. His little one was lying acquiescently beneath him, staring back at him with passion-glazed, half-lidded eyes. There was nothing more beautiful – in his opinion – than his new consort basking in the afterglow of his orgasm. After finishing the last of his preparation Atemu drew Yugi up against him, claiming his mouth once again as he slowly nestled himself in the tight warmth of his body.
"Oh! Uh..." Yugi broke the kiss, reaching up to grasp at his lover's shoulders. It hurt, but he had expected that. It was the jolt of electricity running through his system that had scared him. Gods above, his temperamental lover was going to do him in with his uncanny ability to strike that one single spot every time he moved.
Atemu gave a hoarse chuckle at Yugi's exuberant exclamation, before beginning the motions that would send him screaming to the heavens. "Come for me, little one. I want to hear you over and over again." He whispered, driving into him with a fierceness.
And Yugi could do naught but hang on for the ride, stars shooting off behind his eyelids as his prostate was hit repeatedly with every thrust of the other's body. He could feel the coil of heat winding around his form, begging him to let go. In response he tightened his muscles, drawing a pleasured moan from the one above him, and causing an overload to his heightened senses. Oh, he was not going to last for much longer. "I can't...I can't..."
"Call my name, little one...please...I need to hear you..." Atemu humbled himself as he begged the smaller royal, thrusting in and out of the other's inviting warmth with each word.
Yugi's head thrashed from side to side as the coil of heat inside began to tighten around him, his breaths coming in heavy pants. "Ate...Atemu...please! I...uh...ATEMU!"
Atemu squeezed his eyes shut as the velvety warmth he was encased in suddenly constricted around his length, setting his own orgasm into motion. "Uh...Yugi...oh gods...so tight..." A brilliant white light set off behind his eyes and he emptied his seed into his smaller lover's heat. He rode the waves of pleasure for a moment before opening his eyes to the most glorious sight of his little one coming down from his own high.
Gently he pulled out, mindful of Yugi's hiss of pain, and curled around his smaller lover, pulling a sheet over them as he kissed his forehead. They had both needed this. So very much. And even though he was still so far away from gaining the boy's complete and total trust, this was at least a start.
Yugi was exhausted, mentally, physically and emotionally. He could feel much needed sleep tugging at the edges of his consciousness, and was struck with sudden fear that when he woke, he would find this had all been a dream. As Atemu's arms tightened around him, he whispered, "Say you love me."
"I do." Atemu nuzzled against him.
But it wasn't enough. "Say you want me..."
"Yes..." A muffled chuckle as the older monarch caught on to the game.
This time a satisfied grin made its way over Yugi's features. "Say you need me."
"Always."
Yugi smiled contentedly, closing his eyes and pressing close to the heat of Atemu's body.
"I love you, my little one." Atemu murmured softly, gaining a slightly coherent agreement from Yugi as they both drifted off into their dreams. There was a long road ahead of them back to what they once had been, but at least the journey had commenced. He had no doubt they would find their way – together.
~ o ~ O ~ o ~
Please review?