Chapter 21

The day they had all been dreading had finally arrived, and Diz, Mickey, Naminé and Riku had all gathered together in the lab. Diz was putting some final additives to the concoction, and the other three stood around silently, waiting for him to finish. No one knew what to say. Riku was leaning against the wall with his arms crossed. He moved his gaze to where Naminé was shifting uncomfortably at the other side, holding her sketchbook in her hands. She couldn't bring herself to meet his eyes.

Riku looked to Mickey. The mouse was trying to smile, but was failing disastrously, and all he could see was the grim expression behind his cheery façade.

"I hope you know what you're doing," he said softly.

"That makes two of us then," Riku replied.

"What if-"

"We'll cross that bridge when it comes."

"Come here," he said, holding out his arms to him. Riku accepted his hug, having to go down on one knee to reach him.

"Sora can never know about this, okay?" Riku whispered in his ear. "Please, don't tell him."

"I won't."

"Not a word?" he asked.

"Not a word," Mickey promised, patting him on the back.

"Thank you." With that, Riku stood up and walked towards Naminé. She still couldn't face him.

"Hey," he murmured, raising her chin with his hand to look at him. Her eyes were begging him not to continue. Tears threatened to spill down her cheeks, which she fought by clutching her sketchbook even tighter to her chest.

"Naminé, I-" he started.

"Don't," she said firmly. "I'm not saying goodbye."

"But-"

"I swear to Mushu, Riku, if you even start…"

Despite the grim situation, he couldn't help but smile, and before they knew what they were doing, they were laughing hysterically.

"This isn't a joke, Riku," Diz said immediately.

"I know," he laughed, wiping the tears from his eyes. "I guess, I guess I'm just a little nervous, that's all."

Naminé reached for him and they held each other closely. She noticed that there was something different about his embrace, almost as if he wasn't really with her. It was only then she realised how terrified he must be, though his pride would never allow him to disclose a fear as big as that, even to her.

"I'm right here," she said. "Talk to me."

"If something goes wrong, Naminé, you have to seal my memories off. Every one."

"It's not going to come to that."

"But if it does-"

"I know," she whispered. "I know. Don't forget me, okay?"

"Hey, you said it yourself; my heart will always remember. I could never forget you, not after all we've had."

Naminé did not reply, but chose instead to kiss him. As their mouths met, she tried her best to categorise every touch, every taste, every sensation that made up the man she loved, because she knew that after this was finished, she might not have him anymore. As clichéd as it sounded, Naminé couldn't help but think that she wanted this moment to last forever.

Riku pulled away, and Naminé nodded silently. There was no need to say anything more, and as she had previously said, she wasn't going to entertain words of farewells. She let his hands slip softly from her own as he moved over to where Diz stood.

"I'm not going to lie," the scientist said in a flat tone. "This is going to hurt somewhat." Riku looked at the oozing black liquid intently, fear at last starting to get to him. Beside its colour, the vial that was going to completely change his life held no signs of malicious intent. In fact, the whole thing looked quite ordinary. His mind assumed it would spit and hiss and would be so acidic that it would have to be kept in a steel container that was many inches thick. No, this was strangely anti-climatic, and he wondered why. Maybe he had seen too many films or something.

"Let me see," he said, reaching out to take the vial from Diz's hand.

"Be careful," he replied, reluctant to hand it over. "This took me six days to prepare. I do not want to have to do it again."

Riku held it cautiously in his hands and took his time examining its contents. The whole world seemed to fall away from him as he did so, becoming as important as a discarded tissue. The only thought that could occupy his mind was that smooth, almost gentle weight from the glass vial. How could something that small be that powerful? Would he lose himself completely? Doubts crawled into his head; nibbling away at his certainty until it had become a weak voice pleading to be heard amongst a city of crowded people. In the last year, he had made a lot of bad choices. Was this another one? Was it even the right decision at all?

It was as if on that thought a memory of Naminé popped into his head. It was from the time they had been clothes shopping, and she had picked out the ensemble he was now wearing, which seemed like years ago now. She had barged in to the changing room as he was getting dressed, and he had flattened himself against the wall so she could fit in the small cubicle.

"Niiiiiiiiice," she said, looking him up and down before giving him a wink. Riku noted that this was becoming a common trait of hers, but in saying that, it suited her completely. "Do I know how to pick clothes, or do I know how to pick clothes?"

"Um, you know how to pick clothes," he replied uncomfortably, shrinking back as far as he could into the corner to create some semblance of personal space. "Naminé, this is a changing-"

"No need to thank me," she interrupted, waving her hand in dismissal. "It's what I do best!" She flashed him a big, toothy smile, one that could easily outshine Sora's. He realised that the two of them were remarkably alike at times, which gave him a great feeling of security for some reason.

"Something's not right though," she mused, letting her chin rest pensively on her hand. A red tinge flushed Riku's cheeks as she examined him. He was not used to people staring at him so intently, but when it was her doing it, something in his stomach churned happily from the attention.

"I know!" she proclaimed suddenly, her eyes lighting up as the thought hit her. "Your gloves. Take them off."

"What, these?" he replied, crossing his arms so they folded over his hands, hiding them from view. "No way."

"Yes way," she insisted, pulling at his arms to get them free.

"I, uh, have had them for years," he said weakly, his last attempt to get out of it. Naminé, however, was not going to bow to his wishes that easily.

"Then let go, Riku. Give your hands some air, and more importantly, some sunlight!"

Riku looked at his gloves wistfully, and after several seconds of thought, he stretched them out towards Naminé. Smiling, she took them off, and gave him a pat on the head.

"Good boy," she said, skipping outside. "I saw the greatest blue ones too, and they're even better because they're fingerless-" Noticing his sombre expression, she came back to him.

"Hey, are you alright?"

"Y-yeah," he replied with a feigned enthusiasm, "It's just...." He paused, then let his words trail off. "It's nothing."

But it wasn't. Sora had given him those gloves two years ago as a birthday present, and loathe though he was to admit it, he didn't want to part with them just yet.

Naminé handed the gloves back to him. Surprised, but at the same time wondering if it was a trick, he took them gingerly.

"I guess if you like them that much, we'll have to find you something to match." Riku smiled gratefully upon hearing her words, and nodded his thanks.

"But!" she continued, wagging her index finger at him. "I love these clothes, so you're getting them, AND, you're getting the blue gloves too."

"Okay-"

"AND! You're buying the sea-salt ice-cream!"

Riku laughed and shook his head. "Aye, you drive a hard bargain, Missy."

"You're not a pirate, and you're not in Port Royal," she joked, shoving him playfully. "But I'll take that as a yes then."

Naminé...Thoughts of her strengthened his resolve. If he didn't fight, she would have to. He wanted her to keep smiling like that, he wanted to protect her, no, he needed to protect her. If anything were to happen to her, it would be too much for him to take. So, he would do everything to keep her from harm, even if it meant his own happiness would be compromised. With a nod to himself, he handed the vial back to Diz.

"Let's get this over with," he said. "There's no point in drawing it out, is there?"

"Are you sure?" Diz asked. "This is a violent and dangerous process, and one you will not be able to reverse. If you chose to back out now, no one here would resent you for it."

Riku looked to Mickey and Naminé. Though both had their protests, they remained silent. Everything had been said too many times already, and even if they said it again, it wasn't going to make any difference. He nodded his thanks to both of them and turned back to Diz.

"Go ahead," he replied. "I'm sure." Diz nodded and retrieved another ingredient which he added to the concoction.

"This is a leaf from the Berra mixed with a lucid shard dropped by Heartless," he explained, though everyone knew such elucidations were pointless at this stage. "The lucid shard should help you keep your mind, though I cannot guarantee it." He handed the vial back without further commentary.

"Thanks," Riku said. "I guess, I'll see you all on the other side." With that, he knocked the liquid back down his throat.

Author's Note

Well, I promised I would update once a week, and that seems to have gone astray, so as a little gift for waiting ever so patiently….