A/N

I am so terrible sorry for keeping you waiting for so long. As some of you might know already, I have been in a really dark place, where even writing couldn't give me any joy at all. And while I'm still not where I should be, I'm working on it.

Anyway, thank you for your patient and I hope you'll enjoy chapter 21!

Chapter 21

Várar tries to concentrate on her breathing, but how is she suppose to do so, when he is standing right behind her! His body slightly touching hers as she feels every breath he takes. The small movement sending shivers down her spine.

With a flustered look, the dwarrowdam tries to listen to the dwarf. But her concentration is nowhere to be found. Not with Fíli touching her arm like that! Not with his hand resting on her shoulder, pulling it down slightly.

'You are too tense, Várar,' Fíli says softly, causing his braided mustache to tickle her skin. 'Try loosening up a bit. Yes, that's more like it. And lower your arm, like this.'

He gently guides her arm to the right angle, before whispering a soft 'release' in her ear. Obeying the prince, Várar lets go of the arrow watching as it comes closer to the target. With a soft 'thud' it hits its mark, earning a smile from the dwarrowdam. She has never it her mark dead in the center, not with her elven bow.

'See, nothing to it.'

Turning her head towards the golden-haired dwarf, she notices the proud look on his face as he smiles at her. Nothing to it? She has spent ages trying to master it, never really improving and her hits barely mentionable. She couldn't even kill an orc even if he was to stand a few feet away.

'If that is the case, my prince, I should have shot that arrow myself back at Ravenhill.'

His face darkens at the memory. Almost getting killed by the pale orc isn't one of his most memorable memories. But then his smiles again and winks at Várar.

'If you had shot that arrow yourself, my lady, I fear that would have been the last thing I would have seen before joining my forefathers.'

Várar laughs at this, agreeing with the prince. But her laughter soon fades as she notices just how close they are. With her chest pressed up against his, his lips mare centimeters from her own as she looks up.

Her heart working overtime as she takes in his features and she fears Fíli might feel her quickened heartbeat. Heat rising to her cheeks. Yet she dares not to look away as his blue eyes stare down at her with a strange emotion in them. A faint blush spreads across his face as well.

His hands haven't left her shoulder yet and it is now she notices his other hand is resting on her hip. His hold gentle but strong at the same time, making her feel safe in his arms. Still she can move away with ease if she wishes to. But the question is, does she wish to be away from his safe arms?

No, truth to be told, she doesn't want to move away from Fíli.

She has wished more than once to be in his arms. A silly wish from a silly maiden, but still. What is a person without hope? And her hopes have grown even more over the passed few weeks, with Fíli opening doors for her. Or help her get seated at the table. Just a small brush of his fingers when he would take something from her hands and lingering his touch just a bit longer than necessary.

Várar continues to stare at his handsome face as his hand leaves her shoulder, only to brush away some loose strands of hair. There his hand lingers, resting on her cheek as his thumb caresses her soft skin. By now her skin feels like it is on fire, but the prince doesn't pull his hand away.

Instead he just looks at her with that strange emotion in his eyes as they scan her face. His face now so close to her own face, she can feel his breath on her skin. The braids of his mustache tickling her as he moves even closer.

'By Mahal,' he whispers softly to himself as he continues to look at her. 'You are so beautiful!'

He waits just a bit longer, waiting anxiously for her to pull away. He has made sure she can move away at any given time, in case she doesn't want this. But she has made no effort to pull away from his grasp, so Fíli takes that as a good sign. His eyes shift to her lips for a moment, before meeting her wonderful blue eyes again.

Mahal, he has waited for this moment for so long! To feel her lips against his, it had only happened in his dreams. But with her standing so close, with her breast pressed up against his chest and her mouth slightly agape. How is he suppose to resist this urge? How is he suppose to let go off her and pretend their closeness hadn't affected him?

He had kissed her already, if Kíli hadn't interrupted them. He would have told her weeks ago about his feelings, if only he had the chance. But alas, he didn't have a chance. But he can wait no longer! He must know what her lips taste like! He must know what it feels like to have her lips bruising against his own. Be it a sin or not!

Feeling he has given Várar enough time to retread, Fíli closes his eyes and closes the gap. Never in his whole life has he ever experienced such bliss. Just a small peck, but it leaves him longing for more. Much more!

Yet he will do no such thing, not unless she doesn't want him to. Dare he look at her? Dare he move at all? And why isn't she moving? Perhaps it had been a mistake after all, to kiss Várar just like that. Oh, he is such an idiot! He should have known better than to act upon his feelings!

Suddenly he hears something fall to the ground – her bow he realizes – and a small hand is placed on his cheek. A soft and gentle touch and Fíli finally dares to open his eyes to look at the female before him. A shy smile graces her features as Fíli feels her slight movement. But Várar isn't moving away from him. Instead she is moving towards him, tip-toeing to level his face.

His already quickened heartbeat skipping a beat as his mind tries to register her actions. Though he doesn't have to wait too long, for she leans in to brush her lips against his once more. Her lips ever so soft and ever so shy.

'You have kept me waiting, brother. Tell me, where is my eldest son?'

Thorin smiles as he looks at his sister. The dwarrowdam had arrived about half an hour ago, greeted by her brother and youngest son. But no sign of her eldest one. He should have been here to welcome his mother properly, just like he is suppose to. Has she not raised him properly?

'My dearest sister,' Thorin says as he walks over to his sister. 'I have told you already, Fíli will be here soon enough. Right now he is on a quest only he can complete.'

'Quest? What kind of quest? Has he not have enough of quests for one year?' Then Dís sighs in defeat. Her boy has the heart of a warrior indeed, just like his father. 'Could you not have send for another for this quest?'

'I am afraid Fíli is the only one fit for this quest, Dís,' the king replies, smiling softly at his sister. 'And he will not be the same after he has completed it.'

'Is it dangerous?'

'The most dangerous one can face.' Dís fails to notice the smirk in his face as she start to fear for her son's life. So Thorin quickly continues. 'The quest of hearts.'

Now that got her attention alright! Her son, having found love? But how? Where? Surely Dain hasn't brought any maidens with him when he marched out. Her cousin would never do something that reckless! So where could her son have found a dwarrowdam and have her steal his heart?

'We met her back at Mirkwood…'

'Mirkwood! You mean to tell me he has fallen for some woodland she-elf! I thought you of all people would stop such foolishness!'

Turning on her heels, Dís walks away in anger. Though all Thorin can do is grin as he follows his younger sibling, telling her she might want to check the courtyard for the eldest prince. Curious how his sister will react when she sees her son and the lady he fancies. Dís will probably faint once she sees Várar. The resemblance she shares with her mother will make his sister think she has seen a ghost. Just like he had thought when he had seen the dwarrowdam for the first time.

'Really Thorin,' Dís rants as she paces through the halls of Erebor. 'How can you even allow your nephew – your heir – to continue his romances with a she-elf?'

'She is quite a catch though, my dear sister,' Thorin says amused with his sisters anger. 'Not bad on the eye, good mannered – unlike Fíli – and knows how to handle a sword. And the daughter of Thranduil.'

He hates to address the elf like that, but to see his sister react to it has made him put his pride aside. And his statement has done exactly what he had thought it would do. Dís is absolutely furious by now, practically yelling at her king and brother for allowing such thing. Any spawn of that traitorous bastard is not worthy of her son.

'He should have been married already,' she continues as they reach the courtyard. 'Married to the daughter of my dearest friend…Gefn…'

Dís stops dead in her tracks as her eyes fall upon the pair in the courtyard. One she recognizes as her eldest son Fíli, in his arms a dwarrowdam with long auburn hair and a round freckled face. Her bright blue eyes stare at the two newcomers in shock – as do Fíli's eyes.

'Mother, you have arrived!'

The young pair practically jump away from each other, creating some distance between them like nothing had happened. But one look at the knowing look on their kings' face tells them enough as he looks at them with a smirk.

But Dís doesn't notice. Her eyes fixed on the dwarrowdam who had been in her sons arms a moment ago. Stomping her brother, Dís quickly makes way over to the female, inspecting her quickly. Upon closer inspection Dís has come to the only conclusion her mind can make.

'How could you have kept her a secret for me!'

Pulling the shocked dwarrowdam into her arms, Dís holds her in a tight embrace. Loving and motherly. Though she looks like Gefn, it is clear to the lady she isn't. Standing a bit taller than Gefn and her eyes slightly darker. Inherited from her father. Indeed, no doubt about it, the lass is a daughter of Gefn!

'Let me look at you, my dear,' Dís says as she pulls away, still holding Várar at arms length. Her brown eyes inspecting the younger dwarrowdam as she smiles brightly. 'I can't believe it. I just can't believe it! You're alive!'

'I am sorry, my lady,' Várar begins slowly as she looks at the dark haired dwarrowdam. 'But I am not who you think I am.'

'Of course you are,' Dís says smiling brightly at her. 'You are the child of my dearest friend. Daughter of Vigr and Gefn. Tell me, what is your name?'

Shocked to find the dwarrowdam before her recognizes her, Várar answers quietly.

'Várar, my lady.'

'Oh such good manners.'

Várar just smiles at her in confusion, letting the kings' sister inspect her, while inspecting her as well. Várar notices she has the same dark hair as Thorin, though her hair holding slightly more silver strings than her brother. Her brown eyes, though watery, hold the same kindness as her two sons.

But where as her brother and sons are standing quite tall, Dís does not share their height. Standing a good feet shorter than her brother.

'You look so much like her,' Dís whispers softly as she gently caresses Várar's cheek. 'Várar you said?' She nods, causing Dís to smile even brighter. 'A fitting name for the oath your mother and I took long ago. When is the wedding?'

'I-I'm sorry. What?'

Thinking she might have heard the dwarrowdam wrong, Várar looks as Dís in shock. Where did that question come from? To whom should she be we'd when she isn't even aware of any such thing? Surely she must have misunderstood her. Or perhaps it is the situation she and Fíli were caught in?

'The wedding, my dear. The wedding!'

'W-w-wedding? I, er, I'm afraid I don't understand, my lady,' Várar stammers as she looks at the dwarrowdam in shock.

At this Dís looks confused as well, seemingly pondering over something. But then she laughs, calling over her eldest son. The lad looks as confused as Várar as he slowly walks over to the pair, halting next to his mother. Even from where he was standing he could hear his mothers' question. But what has her question have to do with him?

Unless…!

Várar paces back and forth in her room, letting Dís' words sink in. How did this happen? How come she didn't know? Why didn't he tell her? Thorin had known from the start, yet he had failed to mention such a minor detail? Why?

He had spent so many time with her, talking about her mother. Telling stories about their younger years. About the close friendship between his sister and her mother. Could he not have told her then?

Várar sighs, halting for a moment. Of course he couldn't have told her. When would have been the right opportunity? She can images how such a conversation would happen.

'And then she kicked my ass for ruining her favorite dress. Oh and have I mentioned your mother promised you to Fíli?'

No, that would have been a lovely conversation. Especially since the king has known about her feelings for his nephew for a while. Though he hasn't said it out loud, she has seen his knowing look whenever she caught sight of the prince. She would just think he was jesting her.

And then there is the matter of the kiss she had shared with Fíli. Had he known about their arranged marriage? No, he was as surprised as she had been. Besides no one had known about her existence before the company were imprisoned by her father. And it had been clear to Várar that Dís had no knowledge of her, until she had walked into the courtyard earlier today.

A soft knock on her door makes Várar stop dead in her tracks. What if it is Fíli? What should she say or do? How much has changed between the two of them now that it seems they are betrothed?

'Várar,' a soft voice says, almost pleading. 'Várar, it's me, Kíli. Can I come in?'

She hesitates for a moment, but then she slowly walks over to the door and opens it. Upon seeing Kíli, Várar smiles weakly before stepping aside. Her mind is still processing everything. The kiss she had shared with Fíli, but also the arrival of his mother and the news she has brought. But still, Várar will not let a prince wait when visiting.

'You know, he is just as surprised as you are,' Kíli begins after a moment of silence.

He has taken a seat in a chair, waiting for her to do the same. Though Várar remains motionless as she just stares at the ground. Her mind clearly elsewhere. Not that he can blame her! When Kíli had heard the news he had been thrilled for his brother, having noticed the love he feels for Várar long ago. So Kíli had assumed his brother had finally acted upon his feelings and had asked for her hand in marriage – though according to Kíli it had been a bit too soon.

But then Fíli had told him about the arrangement their mother had made with Várar's and he understood why his brother had looked so shocked. Kíli himself had been shocked as well, though he had a hunch. Why else would her mother give Várar a name that means solemn oath? Besides, every time his uncle had seen Fíli and Várar together, he had a knowing smile on his face. Though there had always been something else in it as well.

'At least you fell in love before you knew about the betrothal.'

Jerking her head up, Várar looks at Kíli in surprise. How did he know about her feelings for Fíli? Had it been that obvious? And what about Fíli? Does he love her as well? Or does he only see her as a pretty face and had the kiss been something that just happened in the moment? "You are so beautiful" those words Fíli had spoken just before he kissed her. Had he meant them?

'I guess you are right,' Várar admits, walking over to him. 'At least I will marry the one I love.'

'And Fíli loves you too. He does, you know. He has done so for a long while now.'

Taking in the information, Várar smiles a little. Well, then perhaps luck is on her side after all. She loves Fíli. She has loved him for a few months now. The first fluttering of her stomach had been when she had found him outside in the cold winter evening, upset about something. His eyes had been so intense and his stare had made her look away flustered.

After that, her cheeks seemed to be burning every time her eyes locked with his, her heart racing like she had run for miles. His smile alone could make her weak in the knees and a simple touch had made her stomach flutter. All those feelings had made her confused, it had been nothing she had ever known.

But now everything has changed, has it not? She looks at the younger dwarf, her eyes showing her concern, while her lips form the words. But Kíli waves them off, stating that love will not change because of an oath made long ago. They haven't been forced to love another, they have found it themselves. And love is one of the strongest emotions – or so he has heard, he adds sheepishly, making her laugh a little.

'And here I thought you had turned into some kind of expert in love.'

Kíli laughs at this, then his eyes darken a bit. No, not an expert, but he had experienced love once, Várar realizes as she looks at the dwarf. She hasn't thought about the obvious feelings that had been between Kíli and Tauriel. To be honest, she hasn't been thinking about Tauriel that often at all. Her mind too occupied with her growing feelings for the older prince.

But who knows how often Kíli had been thinking off the late she-elf? Wishing things faith had played out differently for the both of them? How often had he been reminded off his loss while watching his brother growing closer to Várar?

'Well, I am glad,' Kíli says, smiling a weak smile. 'To have you join our family. And now I won't have to worry about Fíli coming to me for advise about how to propose to you.' He winks at her, before standing up. 'Anyway, I think it is almost time for dinner. I overheard mother and Thorin mentioning a big feast as a celebration.'

With that said, Kíli leaves.

A/N

And this is where I'm leaving you for now. I know, it sucks... But at least you got what you've all been waiting for!

While I don't know when the next chapter will be, I hope you can be patient enough to wait for it.