A/N: Another quick update! I excite even myself! Another slightly fluffy chapter, but sadly I slide back into the dark just a little. Never fear; it will turn out okay. Umm...sorta, considering it is Lily and James and we all know how it technically turns out...okay, anyway. Read on! And Thanks to my reviewers, as always!
Chapter Twenty-One: Kangaroo Cry
"What's taking James so loooong?" whined Sasha, twirling a lock of hair around her finger and looking at it with interest.
"Maybe he got lost," Susanna suggested, flipping through a copy of Witch Weekly non-chalantly, not looking up at anyone.
"In his own room?" Sasha responded skeptically.
"It's actually a possibility," Lily stated, looking over from where she was dusting off a short bookcase in the corner.
"Will you stop cleaning?" Sasha groaned, twisting around to look at Lily over the back of the couch. Lily looked up and shook the rag at her friend menacingly, with a small grin.
"Don't worry about Jamesies, he's just got to gather up the cards from around his shrine to Evans in the closet—"
WHACK.
"James, if you do not stop hitting me, we're going to have a talk."
"If you tell my mother again, I'll just kill you next time."
They boys glared at each other, as James threw the deck of exploding snap cards into Remus's lap. Remus sat up from his spot on the floor and scooted up to the table, shuffling them obediently.
"I'm going to have to let Frank know he's right about his theory," Alice commented, shaking her head at Sirius as he glared at James playfully from the arm chair. James raised his eyebrows at her, leaning on the back of it.
"Oh? And just what is Frankie's theory?" he asked.
"That the reason Black's so brain dead is because you hit him too hard,"
Lily laughed, and drew a look of betrayal from James. Sirius leapt out of the chair away from James and pointed accusingly.
"I am a victim here, a victim! I knew it. You've been sabotaging me…you're afraid of my incredible intelligence, I threaten you…you selfish bastard…" Sirius clicked his tongue like a disapproving matron and shook his head dramatically.
James shrugged and stole Sirius's place in the chair, sitting in it sideways with his feet hanging over the edge. Sasha slid off the couch and knelt at the table; Alice scooted up, too, and sat cross-legged next to Remus.
"Everyone playing?" Remus asked, looking up from his expert shuffling and glancing around. Lily dropped her rag and made her way over, ignoring James's attempt to trip her, and sat down warily across from Alice, placing her right at Sirius's feet. He leaned down with a wide grin and blew in her ear. Just to be obnoxious. She swatted him away and scowled; James stretched a leg out and kicked him in the shin.
"Deal me in," Sirius said, "I'll be ready to play momentarily," he advanced toward the arm chair, cracking his knuckles at James. James stuck his tongue out childishly.
They were supposed to be seventeen and eighteen, right?
"I'm not playing," Susanna said from her place. She sat on the floor against the armchair across from James's, still looking through the Witch Weekly magazine without really contributing to the conversation.
"Why are you here?" Sirius snapped suddenly, causing everyone to fall silent. He had stopped his pursuit of James and looked across the room in annoyance at her. Lily looked at him and then at Susanna, half-wondering the same thing herself.
They'd spoken civilly since their public argument three days ago, but it was like she spoke to Petunia when they were putting on a front for neighbors or distant cousins. They talked school work, mentioned Andromeda if she'd sent a letter, but beyond that, nothing. Susanna was cold and Lily was reluctant to push her for a talk again at the risk of being screamed at.
Susanna looked up from the magazine sharply at Sirius, her cold eyes narrowed. James let out a low whistle, and Remus cleared his throat.
"I was invited," Susanna replied calmly.
"So you could sit there like a Queen lording herself over us all?" Sirius goaded.
"Hey, mate," James started, warningly. Susanna just looked at him a moment longer and then returned to the magazine, which surprised both Lily and Sasha. They met each other's eyes, never having known their friend to back down from a direct challenge/insult.
"Why don't you just play with us, Suze?" Sasha asked brightly.
"Let her be," Alice said suddenly, receiving a quick and thankful glance from Susanna. Lily felt a pang of jealousy. She wasn't stupid enough to think Susanna had spilled her guts to Alice; they had never really seen eye to eye, but it was still Alice who had stuck up for Susanna and not her, which she now felt she should have done no matter how displeased they were with each other.
"Whatever," Sirius muttered, abandoning his games with James and wiggling in beside Remus and Lily, shoving them out of his way rudely.
"Hey, you oaf!" Lily yelped, slapping his shoulder. James plopped down next to Lily and drew a handful of knuts out of his pocket.
"I'm betting seven of these babies that Sirius either wins or dies before the end of this game."
"What? Why 'dies'?!" Sirius demanded.
"Someone will definitely kill you by the end of this game," James responded matter-of-factly.
"We're not gambling," Lily said, scooting back a little and shaking her head. "No."
"That's…yeah, probably not a good idea," Alice agreed, meeting Lily's eyes.
"You're doing that thing where you're no fun again, Evans," Sirius said, shaking his head with a sigh.
"Students aren't allowed to gamble! And I'm head girl!"
"But the head boy just initiated the gambling…sooooooo…"
"It's harmless, Lils, come on!" Sasha giggled, tossing a silver Sickle onto the table. "I'll take your bet, Potter. 'Cept I think Susie'll kill him."
Susanna giggled quietly from behind the magazine.
"Anymore bets?"
"I'm going to bet a galleon that I don't die," Sirius grumbled.
"That's a risky wager, Black," Susanna said mildly. Lily snorted.
"Lilllly? Alllllice?" James called, wiggling his eyebrows and pointing to the pile of gambling money.
"No," Alice said resolutely.
"Huh-uh." Lily said, shaking her head. Remus shook his as well.
"Fine. Remus, deal to the rainers-upon-the-parade first." James ordered, shaking his head in mock disappointment at the girls. After everyone had their cards and had looked over them, they began the game, chattering alternately about recent rumors both in school and in the papers, and which teacher was pissing them off the most.
Susanna stretched out her feet a little and rested the open Witch Weekly on her knees, stretching her arms up and watching the game lazily. Sasha, who had scooted closer to Susanna and was saying something to her in a low whisper, smiling, glanced down at the magazine and suddenly snatched it.
"Oh my god, look at these wedding announcements," she said, calling everyone's attention. Susanna's eyes widened slightly and she made a grab at the paper that Sasha foiled by holding up her arm and blocking the other girl's.
"Andromeda must be miserable—"
"Sasha Webber, don't," snarled Susanna. Lily looked at her worriedly at the sound of her voice. Sasha gave Susanna an odd look and scooted away.
"Why are you being so scary? Bellatrix got married, Sirius," Sasha announced lightly, her eyes scanning over the page. "Oh, look, and so did Didyme Bones—and hey! No one told me my cousin was getting married—"
"To who?" Sirius interrupted sharply. "Why would Andy be miserable?" he asked, looking rather dangerous.
"Give me that magazine, Sasha." Susanna glared at her.
"To…Rodolphous Lestrange, heir to the Clover fortune…says their marriage cost over seventy thousand galleons, whoa, lucky bride—"
"Lestrange? Bella married Lestrange?" Sirius interrupted quietly, his face going white.
Lily swallowed. Remus and James glanced at each other, and Alice leaned back from the table onto her heels. They all knew what kind of family he came from, not to mention what he'd been suspected of lately. Susanna had bitten her lip and was looking at Sirius with something like apology in her eyes. She jerked her magazine away from Sasha.
"What?" Sasha demanded innocently, looking at everyone like they'd gone mad. Sirius threw his cards down, where they promptly exploded with a loud pop! And got up, wiping of his hands and throwing Susanna a nasty glance.
"I suppose I'm really not good enough now," he spat, strolling out of the dorm by way of the passage before anyone had a second to respond.
Sasha twisted around to follow his past, her mouth fallen open.
"What—"
But her disbelieving question was cut off by Susanna brushing by her, magazine rolled up in her hand, and following Sirius out of the room without saying a word to any of them. Lily thought she saw tears in the other girl's eyes.
"What the fuck is wrong with them?" Sasha asked, her light-hearted demeanor faltering a little as she turned around and set perturbed blue eyes on them all.
James didn't answer, he rubbed his hand over his mouth without saying anything and avoided everyone except Remus's eyes as he thought back to the conversation he'd had with Sirius about his relatives in the Shrieking Shack. He didn't know if Remus recalled any of that, but he suspected the marital news had been just the straw to break the proverbial camel's back.
"Did you hear from Andromeda about this?" Remus asked Lily after a minute, picking up Sirius's card after they had righted themselves and sliding them back into the deck. Lily shook her head slowly.
"The last letter she sent me was full of complaints about the way Lucius treated Narcissa…she didn't mention Bellatrix at all. Sasha?" Lily asked, wondering if she'd heard anything. Sasha shrugged her shoulders and shook her head, looking lost.
"You think his own family would have told him," Alice put in sympathetically. James snorted.
"Nah, they wouldn't have. He's been disowned."
"What?" Alice gasped. James nodded.
"He ditched those slimy gits. Lives at my place." He supplied.
Lily vaguely recalled learning that bit of information while James was being questioned before Christmas, but Alice looked surprised, as well as Sasha. Remus, of course, would have already known this.
"That's terrible," Alice said, shaking her head. "Well, not that he lives with you James. That his family is so awful to him. Frank always said they were garbage but I liked to think…" she trailed off and sighed, shaking her head. Lily leaned back and uncrossed her legs, stretching them out in front of her and resting back on her arms. She hesitated before asking:
"How is Frank, Alice?"
Alice lifted a shoulder, her eyes growing brighter with tears.
"He's…he's okay, I think. He's supposed to come back to school this week, his mum wants him to finish his education but he just…he wants to fight, I think. His dad was his hero." She explained softly.
"I'd want revenge, too." James said.
"It won't do anyone any good, though." Alice said, turning her brown eyes to him. Lily smiled sadly at her. Alice was so sweet, so compassionate. She always would be.
"Everything's always sad nowadays," Sasha sighed, standing up and pulling her hair out of a ponytail.
She ran her hands through it and shook it out, then putting her hands on her hips.
"Since we've stopped playing and you guys look like you're gonna start in on depressing stories, how about we distract ourselves with dinner?"
It was probably the pleading in her sweet eyes and the touch of desperate hope in her voice that made them all agree. Remus gathered all the cards and handed them to James, who chucked them in a disorganized pile onto Lily's clean bookcase. She gave him a dirty look.
"I'll pick it up!" he promised, rolling his eyes. Lily just shook her head, knowing exactly who would go OCD and pick it up. She would.
"I really hope there's Sheppard's pie tonight…I've been wanting that all day…" moaned Sasha, skipping along the hallway and drawing a few strange looks from the younger classmen. She waved happily at them.
On the second floor, Lily and Remus, who were deep in discussion about a new theory in Defense, almost trampled a mass of long blonde curls that had been hurrying their direction, apparently not seeing them.
"Ooops!"
"Are you okay?"
"It was my fault…"
Remus offered a hand to the girl, and as she stood up and smiled a little ,brushing her knees off, Lily recognized her as the fifth-year Hollis Shepard she'd spoken with after the Muggle Massacre.
"Hey, Hollis," she greeted warmly.
"Lily," she nodded breathlessly, "Antonius sent me looking for—oh, James, hi." She broke off, apparently finding her target. Lily moved out of the way so James could step up to see what Hollis wanted. Hollis smiled flatteringly at him and Lily glanced at James to see his reaction. Then she caught herself and looked away, brow furrowed.
"What's Antonius want?" James asked, referring to one of his Quidditch players and a sixth-year prefect.
Lily remembered Hollis as Antonius's girlfriend and felt her shoulders loosen a little.
"No, not him. He was supposed to find you but he asked me to," she finally caught her breath and straightened up a little, "to help him. McGonagall wants to see you in her office."
"I didn't do anything." James said instantly.
Remus sniggered and Hollis looked amused as she glanced at the rest of the group. James frowned suspiciously, and looked over his shoulder at Remus, who shrugged and shook his head, holding his palms up.
"I didn't do anything …unless she found out about that toad and thinks it was you…but that was all Sirius, I just kept watch…"
"What toad?" Lily and Alice demanded at once. Sasha giggled. Apparently Sasha knew about the toad.
"Oh, nothing."
"I'm supposed to tell you it's urgent, James." Hollis broke in, sounding a little impatient.
"Er, okay. Thanks, Hollis…I guess," he muttered, shrugging at them and walking in the opposite direction towards McGonagall's office. Hollis sighed and turned to go toward the nearest staircase.
"Hey, how'd you do on that Care of Magical Creatures essay?" Lily asked, turning to shout after the blonde girl. Hollis turned around and gave her a thumbs up and big smile.
"Terrific, you helped a lot. Thanks, Lily. I'll see you around!"
Lily beamed and waved, turning to find that her companions had started on without her. Catching up and berating Alice and Sasha for letting the boys drag them off without her, she and Alice spend the rest of the way to the great hall pestering Remus about this toad incident.
"FINE, if you get Alice to stop looking at me like I killed her puppy, I'll tell you. But if any of you tell Sirius you know I'll be forced to take drastic measures," he relented, sitting down between her and Sasha and helping himself to the first plate of food he came too.
Apparently, this was the side of Remus Sasha was always talking about. The marauder side that Lily had always diligently maintained he was too smart to have. And surprisingly, she liked it. It was better than the slightly sad demeanor he always had around him.
Lily took a seat across from them, alone, so she could see them better and waited, pouring a generous amount of pumpkin juice.
"So, before he left, Peter found this gigantic toad in his bed, at the foot, just sitting there croaking like mad, and he threw a fit…it was funny, you had to be there, but Sirius gets this brilliant idea to lock it in McGonagall's sock drawer and let the croaking drive her up the wall—you know, since she told him once that toads would fly before he'd ever get away with anything under her nose…he really wanted to get away with it…and so far, he has…he heard her snapping about finding the toad to Slughorn but she hasn't caught on yet,"
Sasha burst into giggles and Alice stared at Remus with wide eyes.
"How did you get into her room?" she whispered, as if she was being unclean by just talking about such a breach of the rules.
"I can't tell you that. I'd have to kill you." Remus said, zipping his lips and returning to his food.
"Wait," Lily said slowly, having been distracted by something Remus said at the beginning. "Pettigrew left? When?" she asked.
"Right after the full moon," Remus responded. He stopped and looked up quickly; Lily was looking at him oddly, with raised eyebrows.
"Err…we don't measure time in moons, Remus." Sasha said, giggling. He blushed and muttered an apology, then said something about like Astronomy a lot.
"I, er. I meant about a week ago." He said. Lily sat back a little and frowned. She didn't remember James mentioning it, but then again, perhaps he was upset and didn't want to talk about it. She didn't like to talk about Andromeda because it made her cry. She really missed that girl.
"It's not right that parents keep pulling students out, we need to learn how to defend ourselves. Hogwarts is really safe," Alice said, shaking her head disapprovingly.
"Peter must be upset," Sasha said, always the sympathizer.
"Er," Remus cleared his throat, "No…he's been wanting to go for a while. Says it's his mother's wish but…well." Remus didn't seem to want to say anything else.
Lily looked at him carefully.
"Sounds a little cowardly," she said, clearly fishing for information. Remus shrugged and then looked up at Lily slightly through lidded eyes.
"Yeah, don't mention it around Sirius. He'll lose it." He warned.
"He loses it a lot these days," Lily muttered, tucking into her food and taking on a brooding air for the remainder of dinner.
James didn't reappear, and she and the others didn't wait for him long. After talking a little after dinner, Lily begged off of a walk around the grounds and left Alice and Sasha with Remus, heading back to the dorm to both tidy up her room and wait for James. Though she told herself it wasn't the last part at all and she wasn't being nosy.
She was actually, for the first time she could remember, humming to herself as she performed the usual complicated tapping sequence and fed the Gargoyle their recently changed password. The first thing she did when she entered was glance to see if the cards were still there…and was immensely surprised that there weren't. Meaning James had actually cleaned up and he was, in fact, back from the suspicious meeting with McGonagall.
She smiled and walked towards his bedroom, ready to tease him about it like he did her; she pushed open his cracked door and stopped short, glancing at the small duffle bag on the bed curiously, and up at him as he walked out of the bathroom with a pair of trainers in hand.
She furrowed her eyes at him, confused, and stepped into his room fully, crossing her arms across her chest.
"Oh, hey. Lily." He greeted, stepping up to the bed and pulling a pair of socks out of his trainers to then stuff in the duffle.
Lily hesitated a moment, taking in the few pairs of clothes spilling out of the bag, and walked to the end of the bed, wrapping a hand around the wooden post.
"What's going on?" she asked slowly, a slow dread creeping up through her body. If he was leaving…James wouldn't leave. He wouldn't. She swallowed hard, waiting anxiously for his reply. He adjusted something in the bag and then rested his hands on either side of it, leaning forward, his head bent forward.
"My dad," he started thickly, "has been attacked. He's…he's in rough shape. At St. Mungo's."
Lily felt tears spring to her eyes and she gasped. Her knuckles whitened as she gripped the wooden bedpost tighter and she closed her eyes briefly.
"What happened?" she asked shakily, her heart going out to him, thinking of her own father and his smile, and how she would feel if someone hurt him. James straightened up and rubbed his forehead, and then his nose, stuffing some of the spilling over clothes into his bag.
"Death Eaters, about fifteen of them, attacked the courts while he was in session. They hurt a lot of people, didn't kill anyone…er, aurors think their orders were just to incapacitate and…Lily,"
James stopped, like he didn't want to say anymore. He rubbed his face again, and Lily thought she might have seen him touch his eyes to wipe tears away. But she couldn't be sure. He took a deep breath and looked at her sideways.
"They released the defendants," he said.
Lily blinked at him, her lips pursed and brow furrowed. Prisoners, those about to go to Azkaban for their crimes, being released was frightening but why was he…
My dad's in court all next week….Crouch trials…he's closing up the Mulciber case…
"What?" Lily asked hoarsely, feeling her face go pale as she stared at him. She closed her eyes and licked her lips, looking at him.
"Moody tracked them to the north before he lost the trail, up near the giants," James snorted a little sarcastically, "I don't blame him for stopping there…they've gone into hiding."
Lily swallowed, her stomach aching all of a sudden. He was supposed to get justice. Not run free like all he'd done was steal something, or curse someone a little too harshly.
She shook her head a little, blinking back angry and sad tears, turning her thoughts back to James's father.
"Is he…going to be okay? Do you know?" she asked, stepping closer to him.
James shrugged, looking away.
"I don't know anything. McGonagall…and my mum just told me he was hurt."
Lily felt another pang of sympathy for Rosalie, knowing how frantic and devastated her own mother would be.
"James," she said soothingly, reaching out and putting a hand on his arm, squeezing his shoulder comfortingly. "James, your dad used to be an auror, he'll be fine. He'll fight it off." She assured him, assuring herself.
Nicholas had done so much for her, he'd done so much to get to his position in the ministry, and he'd used some of that power to help her. She desperately wanted him to be okay.
James looked at her and down at her hand on his arm and back at her.
"Yeah. I know." He said weakly, trying a smile and sounding not at all sure of himself. He knew of a few bad injuries his father had sustained while practicing his job as an auror when James was little. He'd taken a legal job at a desk because he'd wanted to be alive to see his son grow up; He hadn't seen been in enforcement action since James was four years old.
Lily bit her lip and met James's eyes, wanting to be there for him like he had for her. Wishing she had to words to make him feel safe and okay, like he had her. She ran her hand up and down his arm gently, as if her touch could make him feel completely confident in her words.
She was thinking of everything that was happening lately and how bad it all seemed, and how just a few hours ago they were smiling and trying to do just what Sasha always did and hold desperately onto the light in life.
She didn't know just exactly why she did it.
But the next thing she knew, she had moved her hand up to the back of his neck, touching the hair that lay at the back of his neck and standing up on tiptoes a little. She briefly saw his eyes widen and hesitant shock light up in them before her lips touched his and she kissed him.
Lily Evans kissed James Potter.
She closed her eyes briefly, lingered her lips on his for a moment, and pulled away, sliding her hand down to his arm again and bending her head down, wanting to hide the dark red blush she knew was spreading out from her nose to her toes, ignoring the screaming voice in her head that was currently demanding to know just what the hell she was doing.
She looked up, one eye shut and the other looking at him hesitantly. He looked nervous, like he was afraid she was about to slap or start screaming at him.
"Sorry," she whispered, her voice barely working to get the word out.
"Erm." He responded. And then he seemed to recover himself and he nodded. "I mean, it's okay," he said.
Lily couldn't help but half-smile an embarrassed smile, confused by her off the wall and weird behavior in the midst of what was happening with his father.
"I thought it might be," she admitted softly. She needed to go have a serious conversation with herself right now. It wasn't like she hadn't kissed other boys, because she had. But this was James Potter, and she was beginning to freak out about the implications of what she'd just done.
He, on the other hand, seemed to not be having that problem.
She let her hand fall to his and gripped his fingers tightly, offering him strength.
"You shouldn't waste time," she said, her voice still verging on apologetic. He squeezed her hand back and turned to the duffle bag to zip it up, letting go of her fingers gently and then hoisting it over his shoulder easily.
"You're not wasting my time." He said, putting a hand on her shoulder briefly and lightly before he looked around the room and sighed.
Lily bit her lip and held back tears again.
"You're leaving, then," she said shakily, crossing her arms and running one hand up and down her own shoulder. He looked back at her and started to nod, but then shaking his head adamantly.
"No, no! Just…just for a few…" he stopped, after stumbling over his words trying to explain. "I'm coming back, I mean," he finished, smiling a little in relief. Lily closed her eyes in a brief thank you to the gods and opened them with a small relieved smile of her own.
"Come on, I wouldn't leave. This place would be nothing without a king."
She allowed him a watery laugh and eye roll, and moved out of his way to let him past her. He walked by and waited for her to join him; she walked behind him a little, following him into the common room.
Rosalie Potter was leaning against the wall right by the entrance when they appeared, her head rested against the wall, visibly crying. Lily's breath hitched in her throat and she pressed her lips together, almost unable to bear the devastation.
Rosalie straightened up when she saw them and tried to smile, reaching out for James. He went straight to her and let her hug him tightly. She pressed her cheek against his hair, running her fingers through his hair and placing a kiss there before she released him, her arm around his shoulder. Lily stood in front of them, her eyes stinging, lips trembling as she spoke:
"Tell him I'm cheering for him," she offered, not wanting to say I'm sorry. Rosalie smiled and reached out, running her hand over Lily's hair and down the side of her face.
"That will amuse him, dear," she said, nodding appreciatively. "Thank you, Lily." She added.
Rosalie tucked a lock of blonde hair behind her ear and turned to go, loosening her grip on James ever so slightly. James nodded at Lily, his eyes clear, and followed her, leaving Lily alone in the middle of the room.
She closed her eyes and let the tears come slowly, her shoulders shaking. Nicholas Potter, gravely injured somewhere in a hospital bed, and all so those selfish men could have their criminals on the loose. Didn't they have enough evil bastards out there?
Lily turned and snatched a blanket off of the couch where Sasha had left it earlier. She re-entered James's room and shut the door behind it, locking it, feeling a little jumpy, the door lock making her feel just a bit safer. She wrapped the blanket around her shoulders and lay down on James's four-poster bed, rolling onto her back and staring at the ceiling, her eyes heavy and wet.
Kangaroo Cry by Blue October (this might seem like a weird/awkward title, but the lyrics fit very well)
Review! Please! :]