I ran a hand through my wet hair, removing the remaining shampoo and let it rinse into the steaming hot water of the bath. Sighing, I placed my arms on the edge of the tub, leaning against it and resting my head on my folded arms. The tranquil sound of sloshing water, and the hot, misty damp surfacing the room in a heavy air was making my eyes hazy and droopy, and so, I let my eyes fall shut.
It's gonna happen soon.
I knew it. I could feel it.
…
…Okay, that was total bullshit. I couldn't 'feel' it – I was just sort of guessing the event must be closing in, seeing as it had almost been a month since the Third Exorcists arrived.
Ever since the Third exorcists were transferred to the Order, my head had been squirming with possible solutions to the upcoming problem. I had been lying awake for hours during the night, letting one plan run and unfold before my mind after another. Unfortunately, my many plans and thoughts had never been very successful, meaning they had after careful inspection, been tossed aside and forgotten.
The soon-to-happen-future scared me. It frightened me because I didn't know what to do about it. And I was afraid I wouldn't figure something out in time.
To put it simply: a certain Rapunzel-in-his-ultimate-form would stab Allen and have the Fourteenth awakened, while Lavi would get kidnapped and tortured by the Noah… and possibly become Sheril's new boy toy.
Both scenarios were highly worrying, not to mention disturbing.
Here is where the real problem came in:
I wouldn't be able to save both of them.
Well… not at the same time, at least. I would have to save one of them in 'the moment' and then help the other person later. And I didn't know in which order to save the two.
Let's say I chose to go and save Allen's ass first. I would have to face the problem and go straight for the core – in this case meaning the Noah of Wisdom - Wisely. Wisely was the Noah who used his Third Eye to capture and force Allen, Kanda and Alma (and Road) to see the past. He imprisoned Kanda and Alma in their own horrific memories to awaken Alma. Once Alma had awakened, he was set on killing Kanda off - all the while Kanda was set on killing Alma. In the end, Kanda ended up stabbing Allen in pure rage because he kept interfering and tried to help. Because Allen was stabbed by Kanda's Mugen, the Innocence damaged the part of Allen that was Noah, and ultimately awakened the Fourteenth (yada, yada, you know the rest).
Saving Allen however meant that Lavi and Bookman would get abducted by the Noah. If they got taken, I wouldn't know where to look for them. It never specified in the manga where the Noah's whereabouts were located. Furthermore, it never showed whether Lavi survived the torture they put him through or not…
On the other hand, if I chose to save Lavi, I would have to make sure Fiidora's –the Noah of corrosion – parasites didn't infect him. Those parasites were deadly and could still act as blackmail if the Noah did somehow manage to capture Bookman. My main concern however with this option, was that the Fourteenth in Allen would be awakened. I wasn't sure there was much I could do once the Fourteenth had been awakened – I didn't know how to help Allen. All I could do was run after Allen the moment he left the Order, but knowing the exorcist, I doubted he would allow me. Not to mention, the Earl and Apocryphos would both be hunting Allen down.
Running around an unstable exorcist whose mind was constantly taken over by a Noah (and was on the run from both the Order, an independent Innocence, and the primary antagonist), was just as dangerous as playing hero and running headfirst into some secluded place filled with Noah to save an exorcist from getting tortured.
Either way, I was risking not only my own, but also Lavi and Allen's lives, no matter which of the choices I went with.
At this moment, slithering down the tub, into the water and drowning myself seemed easier. None of this seemed manageable. I was just one person, what could I possibly do to change anything? And if I somehow did end up changing it, what if I changed the future for the worst? Who was to say I would be doing the plot a favor if I went through with this?
"Oh great wise entities in this universe, please tell what to do."
As expected, nothing happened.
Stupid entities.
Deciding I had been hiding out in the sanatorium for an hour too long by now, I pulled myself together and got out of the bath. It took every ounce of self-restraint I possessed not to just give everything up and go back to moping in the warm water.
Wrapping a towel around my body, I ended up standing in front of the mirror and staring at myself for a little too long. It wasn't a stare of admiration, as in "gee, I look so hot!", but more of a stare in surprise and slight confusion, as in "who the hell is that?!"
Physically, I had changed a lot since I got here. I used to think of myself as fairly average when it came to body size and weight. Of course, due to laziness and too much dessert, I had the usual belly fat and larger thighs – which led to the "crap, I should probably start working out,"-problem, every teenage girl surely must have faced sometime in their life. It was all empty worries however, that I never did anything about.
But ever since becoming an exorcist, my body had taken a few interesting turns. I had gained more weight, due to the sudden extra muscle, but at the same time I had also lost the unnecessary fat around my stomach and thighs. It wasn't exactly a drastic change in my appearance, but it was visible. And I was happy with it – I looked healthier.
On a less charming side however, I had also gained a considerable amount of ugly scars by now. Some of the smaller scars disappeared with time, but there were also some that I knew were probably permanent. Luckily, nothing bad had happened to my face yet, and the worst scar I had was a long claw-shaped white mark across my upper arm. It was from the wound I got back on my first mission, when I fought that creepy clown-lookalike Akuma in the church. That damn thing still managed to wake me up some nights.
Sighing, I left my reflection in the mirror alone and turned around, changing into a pair of shorts and a comfortable shirt. I was in a particular bad mood today, and so, deciding I wanted to rebel against the laws of society, I chose not to wear my shoes.
Not need for dramatic gasps.
I liked living the thug life.
Finishing up, I trotted out of the sanatorium and decided to go to the library. The room was quiet, and most of the time empty – it was the perfect place to think. Not to mention, I loved the smell of the old books in the library.
Yes, I sniffed books.
Sue me.
To my disappointment (not to mention irritation), as I entered the library, I realized I was not alone in the room. And as if my mood couldn't get any worse, it just had to be that guy.
The green-haired, two-dotted, half-converted Akuma Exorcist. Out of the five Third Exorcists that had joined the Order, he was without a doubt the one I disliked the most. As if his broccoli hair and stupid smirk wasn't enough, his personality was worse than crap. Arrogance and cockiness paired with sarcastic wit did not fair well in the same person.
It would be obvious to anyone that Tokusa and I did not get along. Far from, in fact. We were constantly bickering, sneering and throwing spiteful remarks at each other. I'm sure he disliked me just as much as I disliked him.
Mumbling something incoherent under my breath, I threw an angry glare in Tokusa's direction (who had definitely seen me, but simply continued to act casual and read his stupid book in his stupid armchair) and walked toward the couch.
I let myself fall backwards, my feet and arms sprawled to all sides as I landed on the soft furniture. Heaving in a breath, I decided it would be in my best interest to simply ignore him and move on to my planning. I opened the notebook I had brought to the library, and began to scribble down the pros and cons of every decision I was to make in the future. Barely five minutes passed by before an annoying voice cut me off in my own thoughts.
"I didn't know you kept a diary."
The sarcasm and dry entertainment put into the sentence made me seethe with anger. Sitting up, I snapped my head around to give Tokusa a venomous glare over my shoulder.
"There is nothing wrong with keeping a diary. Besides, this is a notebook I use for reminders to myself. Get your facts straight before you open that stupid mouth of yours."
Tokusa simply raised an eyebrow in indifference. Growling furiously, I turned my back to him and went back to my making of plans.
"'Dear Diary'," Tokusa quoted in humorless mock, making my pen pause on top of the scribbled paper, "'today I had fish for breakfast. It was bad, so I may have to pay the bathroom a visit later."
"Ha-Ha," I said dryly. Spinning around at full speed, I grabbed the nearest book on the coffee table beside me and threw it with all my might toward Tokusa. The Third Exorcist effortlessly dodged it, the smirk on his lips widening in entertainment. I glared at him. "Can't you go bother someone else with your annoying presence? I'm actually trying to concentrate here."
"Only because your memory seems to be short-termed, I will remind you that I was here before you. If anybody needs to leave, it's you."
"Well I was at the Order first."
"That is true."
When Tokusa made no indication to leave, I sighed in defeat and went back to my notebook (once again).
Silence finally filled the room.
I didn't know what to write.
The minutes ticked by rather loudly.
I still didn't know what to write.
My body fell backwards to rest on the couch again.
Nothing.
I swung my leg back and forth in tact with the clock's ticking.
What should I do?
I let the notebook fall on top of my eyes to hide my face from the world.
How will I save them?
More minutes passed by…
Who should I help first?
Even more time passed…
How will I ever be able to –?
"Bella~!"
Lavi.
I would be able to recognize that happy playful voice just about anywhere.
"Leave me alone to wither in the deep abyss of my despairing thoughts!" I whined, my voice slightly muffled by the fact that my entire face was hidden underneath a large (but mostly empty) notebook. Not being able to help myself, I still ended up peeking from under the book, noticing that Lavi had now paused by the couch and was staring at me in confusion.
"You are so overdramatic." Tokusa commented from somewhere behind me. Gritting my teeth, I straightened myself up and turned my head again, raising my eyebrows in seriousness.
"You know," I began, Tokusa watching me in silent curiosity, "you might think I'm overdramatic, but when an octopus gets stressed out, it eats itself. Now that's overdramatic."
I heard Lavi break into a loud fit of laughter.
"How do you even know things like that, Bella?"
It was Allen's voice.
I was this close to answering "the internet, mate". My brain seemed to send a shock of warning through my system though, alerting my already open mouth not to say it.
"…Books?" I ended up saying rather lamely. My nose scrunched up in disapproval at the answer.
I watched as Allen entered the library and headed for the couch Lavi (who had somehow managed to move my feet enough to take a seat) and I were sat in, followed by the usual indifference-looking Inspector Link. The white-haired boy raised an eyebrow.
"It sounds like something Lavi would have told you. He knows some pretty weird things."
I shrugged, silently agreeing with Allen. Lavi did know some pretty odd things, probably because he was a Bookman. There was this one time where he told me that apparently Napoleon the First was buried with all parts of his body except one. Not gonna get into too much detail, but let's just say the thing that was missing was the part of the body that any man would certainly want to keep.
Yeah, I didn't feel like finishing my sausages that day.
"Nice socks." Lavi commented, snickering. Confused at his remark, I let my eyes fall to my feet resting on the cushions of the couch, only to immediately mentally face palm myself.
I hadn't realized until now that the socks I was wearing wasn't even the same color. One was a vivid pink and the other was a dull gray.
Great. Just great.
At this point, I didn't even have the energy to care about it (or to start cussing in another language than English, which usually allowed Lavi something new to laugh at).
Instead of doing anything, I continued to simply stare rather miserably at my different-colored socks. Everything seemed to be piling up in front of me. I needed to figure out a proper plan for the future events, but I couldn't do that because I was too tired to think, and I was too tired to think because I hadn't gotten any sleep lately, and the whole reason I hadn't gotten any sleep lately was because I was writhing my brain for any ideas during the night. It was all an evil endless circle. What made this even worse was that I didn't even know when my non-existing plan would have to be taken into action. When would the next events from the canon plot unfold?
"Bella…?"
My gaze hauled its way from my feet to the gray eyes of a certain British boy. The expression on Allen's face was that of worry, and out of the corner of my eye, I could see the look was mirrored on Lavi's face.
Wait, did I just space out?
"Bella, are you alright?" Allen asked gently, making his way around the couch to squad down beside me.
"Yeah, uh, sorry – I'm just a bit tired. Haven't gotten much sleep lately." I wasn't lying, I just wasn't telling the whole truth.
"You know," Lavi said, shooting me a mildly suspicious look, "you have been acting all moody and weird lately. It's not like you at all."
Well, you know, I have just been busy figuring out how to save your ass from getting tortured by the Noah.
No big deal.
You're welcome.
"Hey, come on you two!" I chuckled, throwing my hands up in defense. I vaguely noticed a certain golden golem flying over and landing in my lab. "I'm just grumpy because I haven't gotten much sleep lately! You don't need to worry, it'll get better eventually."
"But, Bella!" Lavi whined, throwing his 'Bookman-Junior-Tantrum', "How am I supposed to tease you when you're constantly tired?!"
"Look," I started, but quickly stopped as something warm and wet hit my… lap.
Wait.
Did I just pee myself?
Confused (and a bit horrified) I looked down, only to feel my eyes widen at the sight.
Sitting in my lab was Timcanpy, his wings looking oddly limp, like the tail of a miserable and sad dog. Small transparent pebbles of water was rolling down the golem's face, and hitting my lab in barely audible plops.
A golden golem was in my lap.
Crying.
Timcanpy was crying in my lap.
"T-Timcanpy?!" I exclaimed in disbelief at the same time as Allen, Lavi and Link (to my surprise) did. We were all four staring at the golem in a mix of horror and confusion. It even felt like the curious eyes of a certain Third Exorcist was directed in our general direction.
"You made him cry." Lavi deadpanned, making my mouth fall open. I made him cry?! How? What did I do? Did I accidentally hit him? Sit on him? Why was he crying?
"Hey…Tim…" I mumbled, awkwardly patting the golem with my hand in an attempt to make him stop.
Timcanpy was crying because of me.
A golem.
I made a golem cry.
A supposed inanimate object.
That was certainly something to add to the list.
I didn't like it when others cried. It was mainly because it always made me feel awkward and I wasn't really sure how to comfort someone. It was even worse when kids cried, because they added the extra audio.
Lucky for me Timcanpy was the silent crying type.
It still made me feel uncomfortable, though.
"It's okay, Tim – I'm okay." In a desperate attempt to make the crying golem stop, I threw my arms around him and embraced him in a rather tight (probably suffocating) hug. I continued to coo the golem, like he was a child, while clutching him to my chest.
Why was he crying?
I knew a lot of animals were sensitive and often noticed it when others weren't feeling too well. Was that it? Did Timcanpy cry because he could tell I was distressed about something? Because I wasn't being honest and simply waved it off as sleep deprivation? Was he sad on my behalf? Or was he sad because I lied? Jeez, I didn't know! Golems weren't even supposed to feel emotions in the first place, let alone cry over something!
It took a while, but eventually Timcanpy seemed to calm down. Allen grabbed Tim and started inspecting him as soon as he got the chance - visibly worried that something was wrong with the golem. After we had all commented on the reasons why Timcanpy would be crying (Lavi kept joking and said that he probably had problems with a female golem – which was ridiculous considering golems didn't actually have a gender) the drama died down and Tim went back to normal.
At the moment, Lavi and Allen were in the middle of a heated discussion over something, both having left the couch to stand in front of each other. This left me in a rather awkward position, seeing as some kind of silent staring contest was happening between Link and Tokusa. They didn't say anything - they just stared at each other. What made it even more awkward (for me) was the fact that I knew they had a history together. Which left me to be in the awkward 'just-sitting-on-the-couch-and-trying-to-ignore-you-two-staring-over-my-head' position.
The silence was unbearable.
Then, spotting my chance to slip away unnoticed, as Lavi and Allen were half faced away from me, I grabbed my notebook and silently left the room (mentally thanking myself for not wearing shoes this time).
So my 'making-plans-for-the-future-events-in-the-library' was a major fail of the day. It made my mood drop even lower, because now I had even less time than I did before.
Sighing, I decided I might as well pay the Science Division a visit. Just to check up on them, who knows, maybe I would agree to let Johnny beat my ass (again) in chess.
Entering the department full of scientists, I was quick to conclude that Johnny wasn't even here. Sighing (because now the entities in the universe were just being an ass), I dragged my different-colored feet across the floor and ended up stopping by Jiji's worktable. Like usual, he was in the middle of doing some experiment, chemistry equipment sprawled across the table in no particular order.
"What are you doing, Jiji?" I asked, after having watched him in silence for a few minutes. The old man simply shushed me, before going back to his experiment, concentration written all over his face.
"Analyzing the bugs we retrieved back in Paris." Jiji muttered, slipping a single drop of red liquid into a flask, making bubbles appear.
I tilted my head to the side in surprise. He is still stuck with those things? It had been a while since Kanda, Allen and I were on our mission in Paris and had been stuck inside an orphanage, trying to protect the children from the Akuma attack. The reason we couldn't exit the building was because of those mechanical bugs Jiji was currently analyzing, cutting off any connection with the outside world. They must be hard to crack if Jiji was still occupied studying them.
"You look tired, Bella." Jiji commented, his brows drawn together in worry as he looked up from his research. "You have dark circles under your eyes. Are you getting enough sleep?"
I scrunched my nose up and looked at my feet. It had gotten to the point where I had visible dark circles under my eyes? At this point I might end up looking like L from Death Note. If only I possessed his intelligence and analytical mind when it came to making plans and saving people.
"Not really," I answered, giving the scientist before me a small smile, "I have… um… kind of had a lot on my mind lately."
"Do you want to talk about it?" Jiji asked, his experiment forgotten for the moment.
Yes, I thought to myself, I really do. I wanted nothing more than to just blurt everything out and tell someone the knowledge I possessed. Jiji was smart – he was a scientist – I bet he could come up with a brilliant plan to save Lavi and Allen. He was much brighter than me and probably possessed all sort of 'grown-up-wisdom' that I didn't have.
"Nah, it's nothing for you to worry about." I ended up saying against my will.
"Well, if you need anything, all you have to do is ask." Jiji finally said, giving me a smile. Smiling back, I quickly decided to change the subject by pointing toward a large box placed on a nearby table, filled to the top with I-don't-even-know-what.
"What's that?"
"Some of my old inventions I decided to thrash." Jiji answered, going back to inspecting his mechanical bugs.
"Why did you thrash them?" I inquired.
"There was no need for them anymore. You are free to take a look and see if anything seems to be of interest."
I eyed the box suspiciously. It's not like I didn't want to look through it, the possibility of what could be in the box had me filled with curiosity in fact. It's just that this was Jiji's stuff. Him and the rest of the scientists invented so much dangerous crap, I didn't trust the contents of the box. If I stuck my hand down there, it may very well never return.
"Do you have a pair of acid-proved gloves?"
Jiji didn't even comment on my question, but simply pointed to a pair of yellow gloves on the other end of his worktable. Grabbing the gloves and slipping them on, I neared the large box of goodies and peered into it.
If a pair of gloves made to withstand acid wasn't protection enough, this box didn't deserve to be alive.
Pulling in a deep breath, I stuck my right hand into the box, rummaging through the old inventions.
"What's this?" I asked, after I had pulled up my first interesting discovery of the box. It was a square-shaped electronic machine of sorts, a little larger than my hand, with a large screen and two buttons in front. What caught my interest was that it sort of looked like an old Gameboy.
"A tracking device." Jiji answered, walking around his worktable to stand beside me. My interest for the invention seemed to grow gradually.
"A tracking device…?" I repeated absentmindedly.
"Yeah, you just place this on the person you wish to track down," Jiji unplugged a small chip at the size of my pinky from the instrument, rolling it between his fingers, "and the person wearing the chip will show up on the screen, no matter where in the world he or she may be."
I watched fascinated as Jiji clicked the on/off button, and the screen on the electronic gizmo flickered to life, showing an overview of a world map. Jiji then proceeded to zoom in on a red dot, blinking on a specific place in Europe, the United Kingdom, somewhere near London.
"And that's where we are." Jiji concluded, once he was done demonstrating how it worked by tracking himself down on the map.
"That's pretty convenient," I commented, looking up from the gadget, "why are you throwing it out?"
"There is no need for it now that the golems we have are traceable." The scientist explained, returning to his experiment. "You seem pretty fascinated by it, you can have it if you want."
"Thanks…" I murmured, staring at the electronic device in my hand.
Ever so slowly, a plan was taking form in my head. I finally knew what to do. I knew how I could save Allen and Lavi – both of my friends would make it. It was as if this one Gameboy lookalike tool was the key to all of my problems. It was the one thing I had needed to find, in order for my mind to finally get running with a proper plan.
Thanks to Jiji's tracking device, I knew I finally had a chance at changing the plot.
A/N: Bella will be facing a lot of hard decisions in the future, so let's see how she handles them.