Hey everyone! So I know last chapter was a bit more insight into everything Paige goes through. This story is designed to take ya'll on the journey of this one Deaf woman. What I want to point out is that Paige's experience is going to differ from other Deaf individuals. I had one reader ask me why Paige didn't have a 'hearing' dog. I want to answer that question. Many of you that I have talked to one - on - one know that I am Deaf. Personally, I do not have a licensed accessibility dog. Now, I have my own personal dog whom I have trained to let me know if someone is at the door or when my wife gets home or if someone is outside, etc., but he stays at home when I go off to work or school. My experience as a Deaf woman is different from a lot of my friends and Deaf peers. Even the definition of Deaf is different. For instance, I can hear some noise and my hearing goes in and out as a result of a TBI. It is more the auditory nerve than the actual ear mechanics. I have a friend who hears absolutely nothing and hearing aids do not help. I have another friend who has a Cochlear Implant and as a result can hear some. This story - and eventually Emily is going to learn and actually see this first hand - is designed to give you a look into the Deaf community - show you what we go through and how strong we are. We are doctors, lawyers, scientists, managers, CEO's - we can do anything that hearing people do, we just do it a little differently.

Also - if anyone has any questions, please do not hesitate to ask. I am not the Deaf Yoda - I cannot answer questions on behalf of all Deaf everywhere, but I can share with you my experiences and the like.

I hope everyone is still enjoying this story. I know some people are like "omg, are they ever going to fuck?" and if you have read any of my other work - the answer to that is "yes" and I never 'lead up' to it and then 'fade to black'. This will have smut in it - eventually. Not all relationships are sex from hello and I am much more focused on taking that journey. If you want to read some smut, check out the Rizzoli and Isles I posted (Me. Her. Us) or the Lost Girl (Fae to Fae). Both have some smutty chapters.

Love you all so very much. If it weren't for you, my reader, I would not be writing. You guys make my heart sing. Love you all and review! let me know what you think and show me some love!

Today was a rough day. It was November 17th and out of all the 365.25 days in the year, today would always be the worst day of them all. As bad as the day would always be, I knew I had to keep my routine. Get up, go to swim practice, go to class, go back to swim practice, study. There was no time to be hurt or upset or angry. There was no time to sulk or to go over the events in my head a thousand times – there was only time to do, especially because the following day I had 2 exams and a project due. Thankfully, I had already completed the project – I just had to turn it in, but you cannot complete an exam before it was due.

There was also one other thing I had to keep face about – Paige. I had never really worried about how I came off to people before, but after what had just happened between us – her closing me off when she was going through something – made me hyper aware of my own actions in trying not to do the same thing. I couldn't very well preach to her that we had to have communication without communicating with her when I was going through something. Unfortunately, I knew that just wasn't how it worked. I also knew that if I told Paige, she'd probably want to comfort me and I wasn't really sure that's exactly what I wanted. But maybe it was. Paige would have to know eventually – I mean, I wasn't keeping it a secret. To be honest I hadn't thought about it much since arriving, but the date…the date would forever tug at my heart. It had been years, but the memory of it was still so fresh.

Even though I had gone to bed relatively late and exhausted, I couldn't sleep, so I decided to go for a run before practice – to my dismay, Paige saw me running the perimeter of the school on her way to the parking lot. Both she and Aunt Kathy kept telling me that it wasn't safe to be outside, alone, in the late night or early morning – it was San Diego, not a small town. What neither knew is that I felt safer in the big city than I did in the small town. It wasn't that I didn't want to see Paige – I just didn't want Paige to see me running at 4 in the morning around campus alone. I wasn't up for the scolding.

It had actually been the first night that I had opted to stay in the dorm since Paige and I had our talk. The project due was a group project and I couldn't get anyone organized to meet earlier in the day so we ended up meeting at 7pm and working until nearly 1 in the morning. As I said – when I got back to the dorm, I was exhausted. Trying to organize 5 people and keep everyone doing what they need to do was exhausting but there was more bickering and half-assed work than there was productivity. Thankfully, while it was a group project, we were graded individually based on our part in the project. I had that taken care of. I had actually completed my part of the project nearly a week ago and had just been refining it, so when we all met it was more getting everyone else on the same page so the entire project didn't look like complete shit. When I got back to the dorm, I had crashed onto my bed and passed out for maybe an hour but then started tossing and turning – hence getting up at 3:45 in the morning and going for a run around campus.

As I suspected, when I arrived at the annex, Paige was waiting for me – her arms crossed and her bag at her feet. She didn't say a word, just shook her head and kissed me soundly on the lips before she would let me pass by. I smiled in response to the kiss, but the smile quickly weakened and I immediately noticed the concern in Paige's stance.

"I promise I'll tell you later," I signed to her.

She didn't put up a fight or press to know right then – she let me go, get in the water, and swim until my muscles burned from being pushed beyond their limits. During a break, Paige took me aside and whispered in my ear "Don't hurt yourself just because you need to let it out. It's not worth it." During my next practice heat, I remembered her words and fought to push myself, but not let the anger or frustration overtake me.

When practice was over, Paige met me outside and instead of walking me to class, pulled me towards her bike.

"What are you doing?" I questioned her – we both had class.

"We're going to breakfast," answered matter-of-factly.

"Paige, as much as I'd love to, I can't… I have to…"

"Study," she interrupted. "I know. "You told me earlier this week that today was going to be a waste of time. So, you're going to get on the bike, we're going to go get pancakes, you're going to tell me what is bother you and then I'm going to take you home and we're going to study until you are fully prepared for your two tests tomorrow."

"You have class…"

"I know what I have, but I don't remember asking you. Let's go," she replied, handing me the spare helmet and hiking one leg over the motorcycle.

Reluctantly, I swung my leg over the humming vehicle and held onto Paige tightly. Sure enough, we went for pancakes. She drove us to a small café near the beach – one of her favorite spots. We ate our breakfast in anything but silence – Paige did everything she could to make me laugh or keep me talking. I was secretly waiting for the shoe to drop when she would ask me about what was going on – okay, well, not so secretly. I knew she was going to, I just didn't know when. After breakfast, we went for a small walk – it was still very early, the breeze was cold and the air smelled like salt water – the perfect ocean breeze. We walked past a coffee shop that Paige refused to let us pass without getting caffeine. She led me to the pier and we sat on the benches and looked out into the open water – the silence becoming thick between us.

"You are going to ask me what's wrong, huh?" I signed to her.

"No." The response was short, simple, and unexpected.

"Do you want to know what's wrong?"

"If you want to tell me, then I will listen. If not, then I will sit here and enjoy my coffee and after we finish I'll take you back and help you study so you pass your exams tomorrow."

I held my coffee tightly and looked out to the ocean. Even though my insides were knotted, I felt strangely peaceful sitting here, with Paige, the wide open ocean just below me. I set my coffee down on the ground and turned so I could face her, she mimicked my actions, readying herself to receive whatever I was going to tell her with one exception – she held onto her beloved coffee.

"Today is just a really rough day. Umm… "I mumbled with my fingers – my nerves showing. "three years ago one of my best friends was murdered in my hometown. There were five of us – we we all having a sleep over in a barn…"

Damn, it was really hard to tell. I didn't know the signs for barn or murdered or sleep-over. Even as much as I had been learning, no amount of learning could prepare me to explain to Paige all of these details in the language she understood. She sat in front of me – patient as always – her eyes looking at me lovingly, showing no signs of frustration for my lack of competence.

"Emily," Paige grabbed my attention. "Sign what you can, voice what you don't know. It's okay…"

"I've just… I've never had to sign these words before…"

"And you're not going to learn to sign them properly today, either. Today is not that day."

Paige reached out and grabbed my hand with her non-coffee holding one and held it tightly for a moment before letting it go. I relaxed after the simple touch and let out a long breath.

"Okay, so like I said, in Rosewood there were four of us girls that were really close. I was a sophomore and we all were having a sleep-over in Spencer's barn because it was the weekend of Aria's birthday. We did that a lot – it was nothing unusual. Allison had snuck in liquor and so we were all secretly drinking and just having a good time. Well, all I remember is I passed out at some point and when I woke up in the middle of the night to pee, Allison was gone. I initially figured she had gone to the bathroom too, but when I went inside, she wasn't there and everyone else was asleep. Alli had a knack for getting into trouble. She wasn't everyone's favorite person – she was actually a bully to a lot of people and while I defended her then, I'm not proud of it now. I didn't think anything of it…" I started choking up.

Paige brought her soft hand to my cheek and captured the stray tear that fled down my cheek.

"I still think its my fault…" I admitted, more tears escaping my eyes. "I should have told someone. I should have looked. But I thought she was just being Allison and going off with some guy. They…um…found her body nearly a year later and the police department still don't have any leads. My friends and I went through hell being questioned and interrogated when she went missing and then again when she was found."

Paige's gaze reflected compassion and love – I could live looking into her eyes forever. She never had to say anything because her eyes said it all. When I finished, the look in her eyes turned almost protective…serious…strong.

"If it weren't for my parents, I wouldn't have a problem in never going back there. You and Aunt Kathy always get on me about taking runs in the dark here – I feel safer here at night than I do in the daylight in Rosewood. It's been years, but it still haunts me. Still makes me uneasy and makes me sick to my stomach every time I think about it for too long."

"Is that why you want me to go with you so badly?" Paige asked softly.

"No, I mean…yes… it's complicated. I want you to meet my parents and I want my parents to meet you. But, you make me feel so strong. You make me feel like I can accomplish anything and like I don't have to be afraid…" I trailed off, hoping I didn't just fuck it up by admitting that I wanted her to come to make me feel unafraid.

"So, basically, I'm your big teddy bear?" she laughed, booping me on the nose with her pointer finger.

"It's not like that…" I tried to explain.

"Emily," she interrupted. "It's okay. Everyone needs that person that makes them feel strong. And I can relate. I know what its like to be afraid and to feel uneasy and uncertain."

"You always appear so strong and so unwavering every single day. I mean, what I went through is nothing compared to what you have gone through…"

"Don't do that. Don't compare your experiences with mine. It's not a competition. What you went through was just as traumatic for you as what I went through was for me. Our experiences make us who we are. Neither of us went through worse or less, we just went through different," Paige corrected me. "I am not always strong, but I am stronger with you here. I've told you this, I felt so alone before you came into my life, Emily. I had a teddy bear that I slept with every single night because George was the only 'person' that I felt understood me. He didn't judge me, he just sat there and let me cuddle him. When I had my breakdown recently and I didn't have you by my side I realized that I didn't need George anymore. George wasn't the thing that kept me together at night. George wasn't the comfort I needed to feel. It was you. I didn't sleep that entire week, really. I had gotten accustomed to being able to run and crash into you. You are my strength and my rock and my person. I get it, Emily. You don't have to try to explain why you want me to go home with you. I mean, think of all the times you went with me to places – to my grandmother's grave, to Chloe… how many nights you stayed up and held me, how many nights you listened to me cry. Emily, this is not a one-sided relationship or friendship. Let me be here for you as you are always there for me. I have big shoulders, love. I can take on some of that. I can be here for you," she emphasized.

Paige grabbed my hands with one of hers and used the other to pull up my falling chin. "Don't look down."

She leaned forward and pressed her lips lightly into mine, kissing me slowly, tenderly – her hand moving to cup the side of my face. I kissed her back through the tears. She released my hands and I took the opportunity to tangle my fingers into her thick auburn hair. We sat there, on the pier bench for what could have been hours – the kiss never quickening. The cool breeze made my tear stained cheeks cold and a shiver went up my back from the sensation.

Paige pulled away after one last kiss, pushing the stray strands of hair behind my ears.

"They said it was going to get cooler throughout the day," she explained, feeling the cool breeze. "Emily, I will go with you to Rosewood. I'll tell Aunt Kathy that you need me and she will have no problems with it, okay?"

I nodded.

"Lets get home – the temperature is starting to drop a bit and I can see some rain clouds. Don't want to get caught in that."

"home?" I questioned.

"You practically live with me, Emily. Let's be real. How many times have you actually slept in your dorm?" she teased.