Autumn Leaves
Chapter 21
Saturday
XXX
Hmmm, while Pony's having fun at the fair, lets see what's happening back in Tulsa .... shall we?
XXX
"Soda, what the hell's wrong with you?"
I looked over my shoulder to see Steve glaring at me, then turned back to the rack of smokes as I restocked the slots of cancer sticks.
"Nothing. Why?"
"Nothing? Bullshit! I've known you since you were eight. I haven't seen you so quiet and mopey in nearly a year, maybe two. Hell, the kids disappearing on us last year was bad, but you weren't this out of it even then. Now what gives? Don't make me beat it outta you."
I considered it, even opened my mouth to tell him. But I thought better of it at the last second and shut it again.
"Really, Steve. It's nothing. Maybe I just need to go get laid or something. Hell, it's been a long time since that's happened too. A whole fucking year." Damn Sandy. Just when I really needed her, she ain't here.
"Hell, if it's getting laid you need, go to Bucks. He's got lots of tramps that'll be happy to service you. You'll spend forever at the clinic getting rid of whatever they leave behind though! But hell, buddy, if you're that desperate....."
"Shut up, Steve. I ain't going to Bucks." I rubbed my head, hating the constant headaches I've been getting lately. Now I know why Pony downs the pills so much. This mess hurts.
"Well, take ten and go service yourself in the john or something. Just, when you come back, be happy damnit! This sad shit you've been pulling is downing me!"
A car pulled up and I slid off the stool I was sitting on. "Yeah, right. Maybe I could … aw, never mind." I headed out to the car, slipped into character, flashed a wide smile and started to ask what I could get them. As soon as I saw who it was, the smile was gone.
Soc's in a brand new Corvette pulled in. The car was balls to the wall in tuffness. Not a ding or scratch anywhere. Inside were four people, two guys with their arms wrapped around some pretty tuff looking ladies of their own. One of the guys I vaguely recognized. I'd bet my last DX paycheck he was the one wielding the knife on Pony in that alley not too long ago.
I pulled out my rag, wiping my hands on it. It was only to keep my fingers busy as I really wanted to wrap them around his thick neck and strangle him dead.
"What can I get you?" I asked in a voice that said there wasn't a damn thing I'd ever get them if my paycheck wasn't depending on it.
"Well, looky here." he said cockily to the dame with the beehive hair-do sitting next to him "See, Brenda, this is what happens when you keep putting axle grease on your hair. Your body absorbs it and eventually it oozes out your pores."
The rest of the assholes in the car started laughing, but the laughter died down as Steve sauntered over, carrying the lit blowtorch.
"Y'all want gas or a tune up?" he asked, looking dangerously at them.
"Come on, Henry, let's go." The chick in the backseat said, obviously ruffled by Steve's glare.
"Later, grease." Henry said.
"We'll be waiting." I called back as they drove off. After they had driven out of site, I turned on Steve.
"Put that thing out. I told you this pump leaks, bastard boss still hasn't fixed it. You wanna get us both killed?"
"Hell, that'd be one hell of a way to go, wouldn't it!" he said laughing as he turned off the torch and headed back to the garage.
"Don't worry, those gook VC have their own fucking ways that are much more painful." I called after him, my anger letting my secret slip. It'd only matter though if he picked up on it. He didn't.
"Whaddya going on about that for, I was only making a freaking joke. Really Sodapop, you gotta lighten up."
I bit my tongue. I had to remind myself that I didn't want him to know for a reason. A very important reason. If he knew, I was certain he'd only join up and follow me. I couldn't risk it. I needed him to stay here and keep Ponyboy and Darry functioning, whether I made it back or... more than likely, not.
Just as Steve and I were headed back in, the familiar rumble of a craptastic car came down the road.
"Man, we really need to fix his wheels. It's getting embarrassing to have that around us." Steve said sullenly.
Now, that actually made me smile.
"Howdy, boys. You guys having fun yet?" Two-Bit and his jalopy pulled in, parking next to Steve's car at the side of the building.
"Two-Bit, please, do us all a favor. Sell that piece of shit for scrap and use the money to buy a bicycle."
"Awe now, come on, Steve. Don't say such things in front of ole' Bessie. She and I have had many wonderful experiences together."
"Yeah, I heard about some of those experiences." I grinned. "If the cars a rockin', don't come a knockin'."
"You got that right, Sodapop. How's the station today? Any problems, or am I just hanging here for fun?"
"Some Soc malcontents came by earlier. You just missed them in fact. Nothing much. Real action usually don't start until closer to closing anyway. Thanks for showing though." Steve was serious for once. This was the wrong place to wave off your friends, and both of us knew it.
"Muscles making a show later?"
I nodded. "Darry said he'd be over later, once he got a bite to eat and called over to Mrs. Nixon's to check on Ponyboy."
"Who wants to bet on whether the kid finally makes it to first base before he comes home?" Two-Bit asked. I whacked him on the back of his head.
"C'mon, this is my brother you're bashing here. Cut it out."
"Precisely my point!" Two-Bit chuckled with a wide grin.
"I got a buck," Steve said, hauling out a dollar.
"You gotta be kidding me!" I stared at him in disbelief.
"Hell Sodapop, he nearly jumped out the truck window waving bye to her last time, don't think we didn't notice. She's got to be hungry for a little tongue by now, even a virgin like the kid should be able to figure it out." Steve laughed, shoving the dollar in Two-Bit's hand.
"So - are you saying he won't, Sodapop, or will? C'mon, you in or out?" Two-Bit was waggling his eyebrows.
"So if I say he won't, then I gotta pay you two jerk-off's if he does?"
"Yep," he said laughing. "This is fun. So which is it?"
I remembered how Ponyboy had acted when he first came home after the summer. Not all that mumbling in his sleep had been caused by nightmares. I wasn't that out of touch with what was going on. I shook my head.
"I ain't playing. Not with his... well, not with him. Find something else to bet on." I walked away.
"Chicken!" Two-Bit called.
"Whatever!" I answered back.
XXX
I hung the phone up. I didn't know what was going on, but that was the third time I'd tried to reach the Nixon house and got no answer. I looked at my watch, 5:30. I sighed and scrubbed my face. I had to head on to the station until closing, then when I got back it would be too late to call again. From what I remembered, he would be working on the ranch for most of the morning, cut for a break, see some folks to catch up for a bit, then go to the fair. Why he wasn't at her home answering the phone, I didn't know.
Picking up the receiver, I wanted to try another number, for a more pressing problem.
I'd already tried the recruiters office, they'd just about laughed at me. The school board couldn't do anything for me either. This was it, my last hope. I said a silent prayer as the line rang on the other side.
"Social Services, How can I help you?"
"Mrs. O' Donovan, please."
The line went still then Mrs. O' Donovan picked up.
"Afternoon, Mrs. O' Donovan. It's Darrel Curtis. Do you have a minute?"
"Of course, Darrel. Is everything okay?"
"No, not really. Ponyboy's fine. Doing well, actually. I'm calling about Sodapop. He got a draft notice, supposed to report this coming week. Is there anything I can do? Anyone I can talk to to get him out of it? I .. we need his paycheck." Not to mention I really need him to stay alive. "Shouldn't he get out of it since he's helping support the family?"
"Sodapop? Hold on, isn't he still seventeen? Let me get my file...."
I heard a metal drawer open, but I saved her the trouble.
"No, he just had his eighteenth birthday earlier this month. He's legal. But we need him here. Is there anything, anything at all...?"
Shocked silence was on the other end of the line.
"No, Darrel. I'm sorry. There's nothing that can be done from my office. I can write a letter, asking the board to disqualify him, but I don't think it will help. If he'd only stayed in school and applied for college, he could have had a …."
"Yes, I know. He could have gotten a deferment. But he didn't. Please, Mrs. O' Donovan, is there any chance, any hope for him?"
The answer was expected, but it still stabbed me in the heart.
"No, Darrel. There isn't, not one that I know of anyway. I'm so, so sorry."
I had to swallow a few times to get moisture back on my throat. "Thanks anyway." I hung up.
I swallowed some Tylenol for my headache, found my keys, found my resolve and headed out to the station. I'd exhausted every channel I could think of. I was going to lose him anyway.
XXX
I recognized Darry's truck as he pulled in. Two-Bit and Steve were having a smoke over at the picnic table the boss had set up out by the curb. It was supposed to be for customers getting their cars worked on, but to me, it was the safest place to be. With the pump still leaking gas and oil all over the ground, I was amazed this place was still standing.
They stuck out their chins and lifted their hands in acknowledgment of his arrival as he came across the lot to me, then together we headed inside the shop office to talk alone.
"Have you told them?"
"No!" I was getting angry, tired of Darry asking me every time I turned around if I'd revealed my secret. "Dang it, Darry, it's bad enough I have to deal with this... I don't want to have to deal with their pity on top of it."
"I don't think they'd want to give you pity. They need to know, Sodapop. It's going to be hard enough...."
"Well, what are you lovebirds all in a tizzy about?"
Two-Bit walked in just as Darry and I were standing nearly toe to toe.
"Two-Bit, for once, don't ask." I said, continually wiping my hands on a towel to hide how badly they were shaking again. I wanted a smoke, but knew better than to do that in here.
Two-Bit said nothing, but he never moved from the doorway, and I could feel his eyes move from me to Darry and back again, trying to figure this out. Steve was back in the garage, thankfully missing the show. I heard the chains on the doors clink and clatter as he pulled the bay doors down, shutting the station up for the night.
Darry turned from me and grabbed a soda from the machine, tossing a dime in the cup on the counter. As I turned to close the register, his strong hand reached over and snagged my neck, pulling me toward him. His fingers rubbed the back of my head hard, telling me in silence that he was sorry. I understood. Of all the times to be fighting, this was not it.
God, I hated this. It was bad enough knowing in a week I'd be forced from my home and my family and thrust into a war I wanted nothing to do with, to shoot at people who didn't know anything about me yet wanted me dead anyway. I knew from everything I'd read, seen and heard that my chances of coming home alive in a year were slim to none. Those who did manage to make it home weren't the same. Either the terror of the place made them insane, mean, brutal, or worse; or they got hooked on the heroine that was easier to get than a candy bar and a Pepsi.
Which was worse? Outright death, or so changed that the brother they knew would never reemerge even if I did make it back. Nether Darry nor Pony deserved either option, and yet I had no options of my own.
I hid it from Darry, but I was scared. Scared to death. Scared so bad I couldn't piss straight. Scared so much I was glad Pony was in his own room, as I was now the one having night terrors. I didn't volunteer for this. I didn't ask for this. I don't want this. Yet, I was powerless to stop it.
"I'll wait outside while you finish up," he said in a strangled voice. I nodded. Darry disappeared out the door while Two-Bit stood there, still watching. Hesitating a moment, he finally left too. I finished getting the receipts and ledger book, took the till and shoved it in the safe. The morning crew would be in early to start up, Steve and I would come back in around one to take over and finish the weekend.
"Steve," I called as I went through the inside door into the service bay, "have you shut down the pumps yet?"
"Not yet. I'm headed that way now."
I got out the broom and went to sweeping the office, then when that was done went and serviced the women's room while Steve did the men's. Finally, when the place was as good as we could get it, I hauled the trash to the dumpster and locked the front door, deposited the keys in the empty register and Steve and I headed out the side door that locks from the inside. We were done. Time to go home.
Darry and Two-Bit were sitting in the truck, listening to the radio when we came over.
"All finished?" Darry asked.
"Yup, all done."
"See ya tomorrow, Steve." I said as I eased into the seat vacated by Two-Bit. Darry started the engine but waited until Two-Bit got his bucket of rust going before heading out. Then in a tired convoy, we all headed to our respective homes.
"Did you get in touch with Ponyboy?" I asked when we were halfway home.
"No. I tried several times, but there wasn't any answer. I'll try again tomorrow."
"I hope he's having fun."
"Me too."
I wanted him to have fun. I couldn't hold out much longer. I was going to have to tell him soon. I was sure after I did, "fun" would be a thing of the past.
XXX
Calla Lily Rose