Twenty One
Kash left again, probably for good and this time Linda didn't even seem bothered. It probably had something to do with the fact that they'd all seen it coming from the moment he'd reappeared. He'd never even said why he'd shown up again, Mickey's guess was the guy had run out of money, but Ian wasn't so sure. He thought maybe Kash just wanted to check in on everything.
Mickey had looked like he was about to hit him when he first mentioned it, but all he'd done in the end was glare and ask, "You are fucking joking right?"
But no, no Ian hadn't been joking and that was why after a lot of persuasion – although Mickey would call it sexual bullying – he managed to cram Mickey into a half decent shirt and drag him over to his old home. He'd been asking for a while to get Mickey to come to dinner, but it took a whole eight months of almost non-stop pestering to get him to agree. And then in the end it was just easier to get him agree to be there for Christmas.
For an almost four-year-old, Lilly was a fucking genius, which it was pretty obvious she'd inherited from Lip. The level of her intelligence though made Mickey turn green on Christmas day, all with the words, "Daddy, you open a present," which hadn't been directed at Mickey. Ian hadn't known what he'd been supposed to say, he'd just looked at Mickey sort of helplessly and waited until the ex-con shrugged.
He couldn't work out what Mickey's expression meant, but he wasn't mad.
Lilly kept calling him Daddy for the rest of the day, like she was repeatedly testing that it was acceptable or something. Ian couldn't help the swell of pride in his stomach whenever she grinned at him and called him that, but he did feel a little guilty because it felt like he was stealing something from his brother.
Lilly woke them both up at half five, or rather woke Ian up and helped him carry all the presents from the living room into the bedroom so that Mickey didn't have to move from his face down position on the bed. It was only when the dog sat on his head that he actually moved into an upright position.
Their Christmas tree was a scabby sort of thing with random decorations Ian and Lilly had attempted to make rather than go out and buy some. It probably didn't help that the dog kept getting behind it and knocking the thing over, but Ian didn't think it looked that bad. His family had definitely had worse in the past that was for sure.
Ian had bought Mickey a new switchblade, simply because he couldn't think what the hell you bought Mickey Milkovich for Christmas. He hadn't been expecting anything in return, which was why he was surprised when Mickey dropped a hard package in his lap. It turned out to be a book that Ian had mentioned years ago when they were still teenagers as being his favourite and he already had a copy, but he intended to burn it as soon as possible.
To his surprise, Mickey didn't complain when Ian grabbed the back of his head and kissed him hard, he just fidgeted about afterwards and looked nervous. He wasn't good at doing anything that would show his emotions and remembering that definitely showed emotions.
They'd bought Lilly a bike amongst other random things and some tennis balls that were half for her to throw at people and half for her to entertain the dog with so maybe he wouldn't chew up Ian's shoes again. The creature was smart enough to know that if it chewed up Mickey's stuff it was dead meat, which Ian thought was sort of typical, especially considering Mickey would never touch the dog. Lilly would probably gut him while he slept if he did.
He couldn't help but think of them as a little family as they sat there, Lilly at the end of the bed with the dog, throwing a tennis ball out into the living room and shouting loudly for Sid to bring it back, her usual doll clutched under her arm like it always was. Mickey and Ian sat side by side on the bed, their backs against the wall. Mickey was playing with his switch blade while Ian pretended to read the book he had, but was really watching Mickey out the corner of his eye.
"Stop fucking staring at me," the ex-con hissed under his breath eventually and Ian blushed a little.
"Don't want to," he replied, knowing even Mickey wouldn't kill him on Christmas. He wouldn't kill him at all, but Ian still wasn't stupid enough to piss him off. Only Lilly could get away with doing that.
Mickey snorted, "You're fucking weird, Gallagher."
"Ahh, but you love me anyway," Ian said and then yelped when Mickey grabbed one of his nipples and twisted hard, not even looking at him as he did it. He laughed after he'd yelped though and batted Mickey's hand away.
He managed to coax Mickey into the shower with the promise of a full cooked breakfast, but Lilly complicated things a little when she said she wanted pancakes and in the end they were late to the Gallaghers because it had turned into a competition between Ian and Mickey of who could flip a pancake the highest. Most of them had ended up on the floor and they'd then had to bath the dog because Mickey had spilt pancake mixture on him.
Lilly had just sat on the counter the entire time laughing at all of them.
Typically, Lilly had insisted on Sid coming to the meal with them, so they'd done their best to try and blow dry the dog with a hairdryer that had once been Mandy's. It was easier said than done since the dog started spinning in circles the moment you got the hairdryer anywhere near him and there'd been a mad dash around the house to try and grab hold of him when he took off running.
When they finally arrived at the Gallaghers, Debbie opened the door and frowned at them. "What's wrong with you?" she asked, noticing how red-faced they all were and they were both still panting. Lilly just laughed and pulled her hat down a little further to cover her ears.
"You don't even want to know," Ian told her, hugging her tight and saying, "Merry Christmas," in her ear.
Mickey just stood awkwardly behind Ian for the first ten minutes, grunting at people when they wished him a Merry Christmas and generally not doing a very good job of proving to people why the hell Ian loved him in the first place. Not that Ian cared in the slightest, because he kind of liked the fact that the Mickey he knew was different from the Mickey that the rest of the world saw.
Nobody quite knew why Frank had decided to turn up, no doubt it was the prospect of food, but nobody had the heart to tell him to fuck off either. So he stayed. Of course, it took Frank a good ten minutes to remember what he'd walked in on all those years ago, before that he just looked confused and a little scared about why the hell Mickey was there.
Ian's hand shook when he picked up the gravy and the entire table watched him try not to drop it. Everyone except Mickey and Lilly, who just inhaled their food like there was going to be no tomorrow, oblivious to everything except what was on their plates.
Even Mickey caught on to the awkward air though as Ian tried to steady his hand, determined to show his family that he could do it. They all watched and waited patiently and Ian sort of hated it because it was almost like they were waiting for him to fuck up.
He jumped a little bit when Mickey flicked him in the ear. "You planning on hurrying the hell up with that?" he asked, a smirk twisting his lips, but Ian knew was he was doing, "Or do you want to hold the gravy all fucking day?" It was maybe clear to the rest of the table what Mickey was doing when Ian's hand stopped shaking, but he wasn't sure they noticed. He didn't even notice until he handed the gravy over to Mickey. "I didn't say I wanted it," Mickey said, putting it back down as soon as he'd taken it and Ian rolled his eyes, kicking him under the table.
"What's that?" Lilly asked suddenly, pointing to the entranceway into the kitchen.
"That's mistletoe," Ian told her, "It's a Christmas thing, if you stand under it with someone it means you have to kiss them."
She frowned a little, "Why?"
"Christmas tradition," Lip answered, smiling at Lilly who looked confused as to why the hell he was talking to her, "Does anyone want any peas?" He held up the bowl as he spoke.
"Me," Lilly clapped her hands together.
"No!" Ian and Mickey both spoke together and Ian laughed while Mickey cracked a little bit of a smile.
Lilly pouted, "Pleeeease."
"We're not turning dinner into target practice," Ian told her, "You can throw a tennis ball at Daddy's head when we get home if you like."
Mickey punched him on the arm hard, but Ian just smirked.
They talked about random things while they ate, but for the most part Mickey stayed silent, just sitting there and eating. He'd already had seconds by the time Ian had finished his first plateful. "Don't give him broccoli," Mickey said suddenly, looking down the length of the table at Kev, "It makes him fucking stink."
They all looked at Kev who looked sort of sheepish as he pulled his hand out from underneath the table. It amazed Ian sometimes how observant Mickey could be while pretending he didn't notice anything.
As the day progressed, most of them got drunk and Lilly punched Liam in the eye making him cry, which of course made her laugh and that made everyone else concerned. Mickey didn't drink all that much, but he swayed a little bit when he stood, which Ian attributed to neither of them having had anything alcoholic in a while.
"You okay?" Ian asked, walking up to Mickey where he leant against the wall, hovering in between the kitchen and the living room. He had a cigarette trapped between two fingers and he blew smoke upwards when Ian came to stand in front of him.
"Bored," Mickey admitted after a minute, handing over the cigarette and taking it back once Ian had had a drag, "Kind of wishing I had some weed or something."
Ian snorted, "Why?"
He looked nervous, like he didn't want to admit to that, but either way he said, "Used to spent my Christmas' high with Mandy, every year." And that proved that he missed her, even though they never really talked about Mandy. She wasn't a taboo subject, they just didn't have a whole lot to say. Mickey obviously didn't know how to deal with the fact she wasn't ever going to come back and Ian still hated himself a little for not knowing how to help her.
Neither of them wanted to say either that they were sort of happy at the same time as they were sad, because this way they had Lilly.
"Oh," Ian said, because he didn't really know what else to say, "Kev probably has some weed if you really want some, I can ask."
Mickey shook his head, "Gallagher it's fine, your brother would probably only fucking condemn me for it anyway." He looked bitterly across the room at where Lip sat in the corner, smiling and laughing with Kev.
"Mick, he isn't going to do anything," Ian said softly, wanting to reach out and touch Mickey, but he didn't know how the ex-con would take that. He wasn't good at signs of affection anyway, he definitely wouldn't be in front of people. Even if they were Ian's family.
He just shrugged and muttered, "Whatever," before handing over what remained of the cigarette.
"Daddy, you have to kiss," Lilly shouted suddenly and Mickey looked over at her as Ian looked up at the mistletoe over their heads. He couldn't help the way he blushed.
"Lilly, you know –"
Ian didn't have time to finish his sentence because Mickey grabbed him by the back of the head and crushed their mouths together. He automatically clutched back at Mickey, digging his hands into Mickey's waist, slipping them under his shirt so that his fingertips could press into bare skin. Mickey's tongue was hot into his mouth, sliding over his as his fingers pushed into Ian's hair.
It didn't last long, or maybe it did, Ian didn't know really.
All he knew was that when they pulled apart, everyone was staring, they were both panting and all Mickey did was light up another cigarette and smirk. "What?" he asked nobody in particular and Ian rolled his eyes.
"You're an idiot," he muttered, pressing a quick kiss to Mickey's jaw before the ex-con could bat him away. Ian decided then that that was the best Christmas he'd ever had, there wasn't really much contest if he was being honest.