Chapter 21: Never Gone

"And then I told Symin, 'Put that thing down! That's acid!' and he looked at me with this funny face… go ahead, Symin! Make the face!"

"Dr. Purah…" he protested, but the pout in her lips betrayed her impending tantrum. He made a face that looked absurd. And as Zelda watched him contort his mouth muscles for the child's amusement, she realized she truly had no idea what was going on, except that she needed to get out of this carriage and back on her own horse.

The only good thing about Purah's story was that regardless of Zelda's response (or lack of), she continued anyway. It left Zelda to think, and she had plenty to think about.

First, she thought of Flaxel. She'd grown to like the girl, and wished she were back with them on their travels, but she'd survived her wound and Riju had sworn to have her personal physician assist Flaxel as she healed. She'd even sent out her own guards to find an elusive fairy fountain. And once Flaxel was healed, she promised to let her stay and train until she was at full health once again. The Zoras and Sheikah men had rejoined her after they left the walls of Gerudo Town.

Zelda also thought about Impa. She'd been awfully mysterious about her summons, and when they received it in the Yiga hideout, it sounded so serious. But Impa had been almost dismissive of it. Apparently, it had been a summons from Robbie asking them all to meet him at his lab. He'd apparently also asked that they bring Granté from Tarry Town and that they have a look around while there were there, that there was no great rush.

So days after being in the desert, with very little sleep between everyone from the constant travelling, Zelda wanted nothing more than to reach Tarry Town and take a nap. Using the power had exhausted her, and Impa had stressed her far beyond where Zelda could tolerate. It felt like a cruel prank, to summon them so quickly for a simple visit.

"So then, one the fox had eaten the stew, I knew I'd found the answer to all of our problems. But Symin…"

Zelda knew that story would continue, and she retreated back into her thoughts.

And her thoughts were on Link.

She kept trying to push them away. She remembered the look on his face after his actions had sunk in. It had been regret. It had been embarrassment.

He rode beside the carriage, though he was far enough that he wouldn't hear them anyway. From the window, she could see that he was sitting stiffer than usual, and there was nothing about him that looked calm or relaxed. It was almost reminiscent of how he'd been 100 years earlier. He'd always been on high alert and tense.

But she couldn't ignore how she'd felt.

To her, there was nothing she regretted. It had been right.

"What do you think?" Purah broke in.

Zelda cleared her throat and cast a sidelong look at Symin. He nodded ever so subtly.

"Yes, of course!" Zelda enthused. It seemed to be the desired response, as Purah began to bounce as she leapt into another story.

Zelda was almost sure she'd dozed off. Purah's story was finished, and Tarry Town came into view just across the remainder of the land bridge. Zelda wondered how long it had been.

"Purah?" she asked groggily. The young girl grunted in acknowledgement. "I'm sorry I fell asleep during your story."

But the young girl shrugged nonchalantly. "It's okay. You looked tired."

"Thank you for understanding."

Zelda peeked her head from the window and saw Granté waiting at the entrance. She strained her ears to hear the muffled conversation.

"… stop back here on the return to Kakariko. My father's message was strange to me."

Zelda quickly exited the carriage and made her way towards Granté. Link hastily dismounted and was on her heels.

"Granté? You said you received word from your father?"

"Princess Zelda," he said with a bow. "Yes, this doesn't sound quite like him. He sends a letter then tells me to entertain guests and have a good time? When my father wants something, he needs it immediately. He wouldn't have sent the letter otherwise. We should go straight there."

Zelda nodded, though one of the Sheikah was in charge of their journey. She turned to them both, forgetting in her need for sleep which it was. "I agree with him. Something about this message is odd. We need to get to him immediately, especially if there's a possibility that there are Yiga manipulating his letters."

It seemed to light a fire under Granté, and it was clear that he wouldn't take no for an answer. Paya offered him a hand, and he slid onto the horse with her. Zelda looked longingly at Tarry Town, but knew that it was better this way. They needed to see if Robbie was okay.

She went to get back in the carriage, but instead, turned for Cloud, feeling instantly relieved as they began to turn the retinue around. Still… she longed for that restful nap in town, and to see what it was that Link had practically built.

They continued up the mountainous hill toward Robbie's lab without stopping. It was only when they neared the top that Granté was the first to speak, pulling the reins from Paya to halt the horse.

"Mother?" Granté said as they headed up the hill towards the lab. She was waiting outside, her arms crossed protectively across her chest.

He hurried ahead, throwing himself off his horse to rush to her side more quickly. From where he sat, he could see her wiping tears from her face.

Zelda hopped off of Cloud, followed by Paya and Link. Something was wrong.

"Jerrin?" she asked just as Purah and Symin reached him.

"He begged me not to tell you," she said, sniffling. "Please, go inside."

The smell hit them first when Granté opened the door. It was the smell of skin decaying, of oils to try to alleviate pain. It was the smell of death.

"Father!" Granté cried as he pushed past everyone.

Robbie was lying in their bed just on the left side of the door. A small stool had been pulled up beside it.

Robbie had removed his ever-present goggles, revealing squinting eyes that looked blindly up at the ceiling. His shirt was drenched in sweat, and his breathing was shallow. He no longer looked like the Robbie Zelda had known. His face sank into his bones, and his body was stiff under a single blanket. But his eyes were alert at the voice of his son.

"They're all here?" Robbie asked. His voice was weak and raspy, underused. With every word, a wheezing breath escaped his lips as well.

"They're here, my love."

Zelda took a step back, not realizing Link was behind her. She turned to him, horrorstricken. This couldn't be happening. It was a bad dream that she'd wake up from.

"Son," Robbie wheezed, "Stay with your mother. I need to speak with my guests."

Granté looked dismayed but didn't bother to argue. Not now.

"Purah?" Robbie whispered. She stepped forward, dragging Symin with her. "You are not a child, my friend. Come here."

It seemed to take a lot for Purah to release her assistant, but she eventually did, and she crossed her arms in defiance, as if she could have enough of an attitude to end Robbie's imminent departure.

"Purah, I have never known a truer friend. Your knowledge is doubtless, and I have never truly questioned you. I would never have been able to proceed in my research with the Guardians without you."

Purah shook her head. "I can get you a potion, Robbie. You don't have to go through all of this sad stuff. We can just start a little younger. It's easy."

But Robbie just chuckled. "We could, couldn't we? But my son would be older than me."

"Take the potion, Robbie!" she demanded. "I can get to my lab and back faster than you can say snap!"

"No."

"Take it!" she cried, tears spilling over her eyelids.

"You should not have taken it either, Purah," he said, shaking his head. "There is no way to cheat death. Link did once, but he will face it in time. You cannot keep reversing the clock. It comes for us all. But the Goddesses' arms are warm, Purah. Don't fear them."

"I don't want you to die, Robbie. You're my best friend. Please, take the age reversing potion." She wiped another tear.

"Immortality is not living forever, it's creating something that will live on long after you've gone. And we've done that, Purah. Because of the Calamity… we are immortal."

"No," she sniffed, backing up. "I'm going to get it for you."

She ran out the door, followed closely by Symin.

"Paya," he whispered. "She'll be going to her lab. I've told your grandmother everything. She knows I'm dying. But tell her one more thing for me, will you? Tell her to whistle a tune for me. It's an old joke between the two of us. She'll understand. You take care of her."

"I will, I swear," Paya said, tearfully bobbing her head.

"Well, Princess," Robbie said, turning his full attention to her. "It seems our story is at an end as well."

Zelda looked over his frail body. She noticed that the body beneath the blankets ended just above his knee, where his fake legs began. He'd taken them off.

"No, Robbie. It can't end here. Please, don't leave me."

"I have to. You heard what I told Purah. All must come to an end."

Zelda knelt down, grabbing his weak hand in hers. "You're all I have. Please."

He pulled his hand from hers and placed it on her cheek. "I loved you, you know. I still do. Not in the way I love my Jerrin," he said, casting her a goofy smile, "But I love you all the same, as I also love Purah. I will never leave you, as you could never leave me. You were scarred on my heart, Princess."

"You were my first love, Robbie. My young child's crush, my best friend after. You were my mentor in many ways. I'm glad you got your lab, but I wish you'd been able to study in peace."

He shook his head, patting her hand. "My only regret in this life I've led is that I will not get to see you become Queen. Whatever you choose to do from here on, let it be a choice that lives in your heart. You're no longer bound by destiny."

Zelda brushed her sleeve over her eyes, trying to stop the steady stream of tears that poured from her eyes.

Robbie had fallen silent for a time before taking a breath again. "Impa will die. She will die soon. She was older than I. Purah will die. She'll concoct another death draught, I'm sure. Link will die. You will die. Paya, will die. Then we shall all reunite with the Goddesses."

Struggling to stay strong, Zelda nodded. "That's some consolation."

"Take care of Purah. Should she restore her proper age, she may one day come to regret storming out on me. I wish she hadn't. There was more I wanted to say. But alas, it will have to wait for our next lifetime." He adjusted himself slightly. "Link?"

Link stepped forward, kneeling beside Zelda with a stone walled expression.

"You made my life's work have purpose. The armor I made, the weapons. Granté will continue my work, as will Jerrin. My notes are all here. Perhaps even the Princess might help, as she once did. Look out for her. She is precious to us all. And if your memories return, do not fight them, but do not be consumed by them. You must live in the present, not the past. This is not the past, Link. Remember that."

Link nodded and stood up.

Zelda let out a strangled sob as she watched Robbie's eyes flutter, knowing his time was nearing. She leaned over and kissed his forehead. "We're going to go outside, Robbie. Your family needs you now."

He smiled and squeezed her hand one final time. "You are my family."

She nodded and stepped back, letting Granté rush to take her place, Jerrin moving to the other side of the bed.

Zelda all but ran outside, hurrying over to the pile of junk Guardian's Robbie had destroyed. She climbed into the center and grabbed one of the claws that dug into the ground on each leg. Turning it over a few times, she let out a frustrated cry and threw it.

Hands were on her arm, and she turned to Link. "He didn't even tell us before it was too late. We could have saved him! We might have stopped it!"

"He didn't want that."

Zelda wanted to argue, but she picked up another claw, prepared to throw it. But she couldn't. All she could do was cry with her knees to her chest, Link's hand on her arm, and the wind carrying her sorrow.

"The stars look beautiful, don't they, Renete? I wish we could fly there. One day, I'll find a way. But don't wait for me, sweet sister. You need something to do until I find you again. And when I'm old, I'll catch up."

Zelda sat on the edge of the cliff, her feet dangling precariously over the side. She stared at the stars, thinking of Robbie's delirious last words. Purah had gone, nowhere to be found, Link had stood beside her with Paya while Granté and Jerrin had knelt beside him, holding his hand.

Now, alone on the cliff, Zelda desired nothing more than to see Robbie walk up beside her to comfort her, as he had in the past. But she knew the presence behind her was Link guarding her, not Robbie.

"What's it like to die? I don't believe I ever asked."

It was silent behind her for a long time until she heard Link's boots crunch against the grass.

"I can't remember. All I know is that I felt the pain from the Guardian, and then I woke up a century later."

Zelda sighed, defeated. "I suppose that means you don't go to the Sacred Realm. I remember every moment of it. Time passes so differently there. While it feels like a millennia, it also feels as you described: one moment you're making your sacrifice, and then the next, you're back. It feels like just months ago that Robbie was working outside my window to make Cherry run with Purah. It feels like it's only been a few years since we were introduced when he was brought onto the project. It was still in its development stages when Purah and Robbie were brought in.

"I should have expected this. They're old. But, I suppose, one is never truly prepared. Impa once told me that her people believe that spirits that were taken violently from their bodies linger in this world. Hopefully, that means he's at peace with the Goddesses."

Link sat beside her as he listened. "I remember something my father told me once. He said that the sky is the true home of the Goddesses, and that's why we can feel their eyes on us always. He said that when their creations die, they bring them home to the sky where they can live on forever to watch over their loved ones. We burn with such fierceness in our lives that we take it with us to the sky and can be seen when the night is dark. We are the stars, and a new star appears each time a soldier dies. Or, well, that was the context my father told me that. It was so I knew that if he didn't return home, he'd still be watching. But Robbie doesn't have to be a soldier."

Zelda liked to think that he was still watching from beside the Goddesses, but it was too fresh, too painful.

"What about falling star fragments?" she asked solemnly. There was no life in her voice.

"They aren't stars. Each time a 'star' races through the night, it is one of the Goddesses crying. We are all theirs, and they grow attached to many of us. When you and I die, they'll likely shed a tear as well."

Zelda scoffed. "For you, yes." She leaned back and turned to Link. "When did you remember that?"

Link shrugged. "Some memories come to me, like that one, as I speak. Some I dream, and some I just remember."

"Do you remember Robbie?"

His head slowly nodded. "My last memory of him is when had been facing down Cherry, the Guardian. It was just after I returned from the castle. But I remember us finding them all together at the Shrine of Resurrection just before I left. That's my true last memory of him before… my own death."

She sighed absently. Link had come back after the Champion's had died. There hadn't been enough power to hold Ganon back for Link, and he was forced to retreat back to the Shrine where the Sheikah had been working. But a Blood Moon, the first in centuries, had darkened the sky, bringing back every Guardian, and negating every hard-fought battle. It's when Link had taken her away, forcing her to run while the Sheikah, Robbie included, held off the Guardians.

She preferred to think of the time before that, before Link had left, a time when there was still hope. Zelda could even remember their conversation just after they'd kissed. Link had no intention of returning from the castle alive, and they believed it to be their last moment together.

"Promise me you'll come back," she'd said, an unsettling feeling growing within her.

Link had nodded slowly, choosing his words with careful measure. "I will always come back to you."

"What about in this lifetime?"

Link had chuckled and slowly let go of her hand, savoring every last touch before walking out towards Hyrule Field. "We can only hope."

"I kept my promise, didn't I?" Link asked, nudging Zelda after she'd clearly slipped into her own memories.

"Yes, you did. You…" she stopped, staring into his eyes. They were dancing with the reflected light of the blue flame. They'd kissed. And it hadn't been an ordinary peck on the cheek, no forehead farewell that a beloved knight might bestow upon his dearest queen. "How much of that day do you remember?"

For another long moment, Link remained silent. But when he turned to her, he seemed determined. "What were you going to ask the Great Deku Tree to tell me when you brought him my sword?"

"What difference does it make what I was going to ask?"

"I have so many lives in my head all telling me that they're the real thing. Am I your knight? Did I meet you in a room after a Yiga attack, or see you at a parade? Or was the first time I ever knew a thing about you when I heard your voice from my Sheikah Slate. Is it even mine? Or is it yours?"

He paused for a moment, but she didn't answer him. Her face was flushed.

"Tell me this then: did we kiss for the first time in Gerudo Desert, or at the top of Dueling Peaks?"

"I…" she started, though she couldn't find the words to finish.

He was too deep to stop now. "Did we enjoy it, or did I feel as if I'd disrespected the Goddesses themselves? I am living with these questions for every single action I make. Losing Robbie feels like I've lost my first friend. It's painful and fresh and stings and it burns all at once. But then I remember being a soldier and losing my friends for the first time. I remember that pain. And I remember losing Daruk and Mipha. I'd grown accustom to my closest friends dying by then. So how is Robbie hurting so much if he's truly not the first?"

Link shook his head and stood up, bowing. "Your Highness, forgive me. I shouldn't have put all that on you." His words were a mixture of guilt and pleasure. He'd needed to say it to her.

"Wait, Link," Zelda said, moving to stop him.

He held up a hand. "I shouldn't have done this now. We need to be here for Granté, Jerrin, and Purah. And… I'm here for you. No matter what you may think after all I've just said to you, I am."

She reached out and took his hand, relieved that he didn't pull away. "As am I."

A/N: Fun fact: This was actually one of the first chapters I knew I was going to write when thinking if I had enough material for this. Originally, Purah was supposed to die here because of her failed aging potion, but when I realized I didn't like writing her kid version, I knew it would have to be Robbie since he is more present in this story. But the scene itself is fourth on my original list which reads, "Z's powers are whacked out, Cole shows up, Link's memories are pretty gone, Purah (crossed out and Robbie written in later) dies." So now you know what my 'outlines' look like. They're trash. But I love them.

REVIEWS! Shanysch: YASS! I was waiting for the kiss too! Honestly, Link is oblivious, but I feel like he would be. His job messed up his way of thinking, in my opinion. He can't break from his ingrained soldier mindset, and in that, he has to be selfless and put himself aside for Zelda's sake. Poudinha: It should definitely worry you! He's definitely at war with himself right now. We'll see how it affects him moving forward (I know how it will)! Bladeofthebookworms: I personally prefer to use the amber earrings because I love Link without the cap for this game so the earrings make him almost look like his default self (I'm super boring). I'm SO glad someone reads the titles though! You have no idea! I HATE writing chapter titles and then I just assume people brush over them and that I've wasted forever trying to think of one for no reason. But SLAY THE MOLDUGAS I SUPPORT YOU! Yes let me know! I'm excited! Nekotoko: Seriously, he needs to get over himself! But he's got that mentality ingrained in him, so I guess he can avoid it for a little longer. I guess. Pfff, if only I was the author and could make him! Lol! Roel De Tremmerie: Thank you very much! Blainebawesome: YASS LINKLE! My deepest thoughts happen at 4am when my insomniac self refuses to sleep, so I've got you! As much as I LOVE BOTW Link and Zelda, I still think that Skyward might do the whole pure don't-need-to-say-it love thing better, but that might be because Zelda's physically in that game a bit more. What says "I love you" like pushing someone off a giant statue? But yeah, my Molduga strategy is basically to charge in bomb arrows a-blazing. But if I'm low on those or hearts it's the same as yours, so I approve of your strategy!