Hey guys xx Sorry for the wait ... couldn't decide what time gaps I wanted in this chapter but I have it figured out now. Sorry for all the mistakes I made because I know I made mistakes. Please feel free to point any out to me if you feel the need. Probably made them cause I got excited.
Thanks for the reviews xxx It also took me a while to write this as I binged watched season four yesterday so I didn't really have time to do both because the show just captivates you into not doing anything but watching it. I've already got lots of ideas for the story and I'm happy to say that I plan on writing this through season five and such.
Please review xx I'd like to know what you all think but I'd also like to know what you guys might want to happy in the next few chapters xx The baby will becoming soon and I know a lot of you want Judith but I was wondering if any of you might want a boy instead so please let me know. I'm pretty sure Judith will be in the story anyway. If anyone was future ideas as well I'd like to know - I have a notebook where I write down all ideas so I won't forget.
So please review and enjoy this chapter xx Comet96 xx
"I heard dad talking to Hershel," Carl muttered dropping down next to me as we waited by the side of the road. Rick had stopped the cars so we could all stretch our legs. After last night Rick didn't want to hang around in case there were others. "He said you killed those men," I glanced to him then before looking away at the road we had driven down. I heard him sigh beside me and I didn't know what he was thinking about. "I don't think you're a monster mom. I know what must be going through your head. I thought the same things when I killed Shane but I know that you are not a monster." He settled his hand on mine lightly giving it a light squeeze as he rested his head against my shoulder.
"Do you know why I did it?" I asked him turning my head so it was resting against his lightly. I caught Rick's eye as he walked over to Hershel talking to him lightly but his eyes stayed connected with mine before looking away at the older man. He shook his head and I knew that he was too young to actually understand but I knew he should know. "I did it to protect you, to protect the others. Those men were going to take me and Maggie, they were going to take Carol, Amy, Kelly and Beth. They were going to take you and kill the others. They were going to take us all away from each other and kill your dad. Kill Hershel and Glenn and Daryl and T-Dog. I couldn't let that happen so I stopped them." I could feel the tears slipping down my cheeks at my words. Carl moved away from my shoulder then and looked up at me. He lifted his hand, wiping away the tears before giving me a soft smile.
"I would have done the same thing. Dad would have done the same thing. I think anyone would have done the same thing if it meant keeping this family safe and alive." He assured me and I smiled through the tears and brought him close to my chest. He shouldn't be saying these words to me, I should be the one to comfort him. He was too young to be comforting me.
"You shouldn't have to make that choice," I whispered to him pressing my lips to his hair as I held him close to me.
"I might have to make that choice one day mom. If I have to protect you I would kill anyone that got in our way. When that baby's born if I have to protect him I will kill to do that." He didn't struggle with his words. His voice didn't crack, he didn't cry and I knew he meant every word. I didn't want him to think he had to make that choice but I knew at the end of the day he would still be thinking about it.
"You know Hershel thinks this baby's going to come in May," I told him changing the subject hoping he would forget about what he had just said. I didn't want him growing too far from humanity that the decision to take someone's life didn't need to be thought about. "Hopefully not on your birthday but babies decide when they want to come out so maybe this one wants to share your birthday with you." I teased him ruffling his hair as he scowled at my words.
"Do you really think this baby will be born on my birthday?" he asked and I knew that his mind had been taken off of what he had said seconds before. I smiled at his words as stood slowly from floor.
"I don't know baby, but look how fast he's growing," I muttered to him running my hand over the bump as I looked down to him. I could see him glancing up at me form where he sat, his eyes squinting as he looked over the bump that was sticking out of my stomach. It looked like I had a large watermelon sticking out of my stomach now or maybe a large pumpkin. Seeing as I was small before I fell pregnant it was more obvious that there was a baby growing inside me.
"I hope he waits until after my birthday. I wouldn't mind sharing with him but I'd like to have my birthday to myself." He mumbled getting to his feet as he placed his hand against the bump where his little brother or sister was kicking wildly. The baby did that a lot around Carl or Rick, he could hear them now and it seemed he was used to their voices. "I might be the only one left in the world with my birthday," he added and I could hear the sadness laced within his voice.
"Let's get back to the car," I sighed softly, placing my hand on his shoulder as I pushed him away from the edge of the road and over to the others. I didn't need him thinking about the lack of people that lived in this world.
It was exhausting. I knew that everyone else felt the same way but I felt like I couldn't move anymore. I glanced to Beth at my side as she ran her hand over my lower back and I cringed when a sharp pain shot through my lower stomach.
"Are you okay?" Beth asked glancing down at me when I squeezed her hand and breathed out through my teeth. "Daddy!" she called out alerting Hershel to the fact that I was in pain.
"What's wrong?" he asked coming to our side within seconds, Maggie following him as he crouched down in front of me.
"Just Braxton Hicks," I assured him sucking in a breath and straightening up as the pain went away. "Don't worry Hershel,"
"What's going on?" Rick questioned as he stopped beside Maggie looking to me carefully. I could see that he was taking in the way I had my hand rested on the bump and how Beth was standing close to me like she had been supporting me. "Is it the baby?"
"False labour," Hershel muttered to him climbing to his feet before pressing his fingers lightly to my stomach. I knew he was checking to make sure I wasn't lying because we both knew that I wouldn't alert my pain to the group.
"Are you sure?" Rick asked carefully glancing between me and Hershel before settling his eyes on the vet.
"Seems about right, she's about thirty-two weeks. She should be getting them later but with us running around all the time the stress is probably getting to the baby." Hershel told him moving his hand from my stomach and looking to Rick with a small smile. "We'll need to worry if her waters break. If she has this baby now there might be some problems."
"What sort of problems?" my husband asked glancing between the two of us as he waited for us to answer. Hershel looked to me and I knew he was asking if I had a problem with Rick knowing. Beth, Maggie, Amy and Carol knew what problems could be caused by the baby coming early and although Kelly had never helped deliver a baby she knew of the problems of premature labour. Rick should know as well. It was his baby as well and I was his wife. I nodded my head at Hershel before resting it against Beth's shoulder as she rubbed my back gentle.
"If the baby comes now we have no idea if he'll survive. A term baby is thirty-seven weeks up to forty and they have the most likely chance of surviving. If she had this baby now he might not have developed all his organs, his lungs might collapse and he'll die. Most babies born between thirty-two weeks to thirty-six need some sort of extra care. We can't give that to him Rick. We have no hospitals and there are no incubators for him." Hershel told him and I could see the pain and anger flash across Rick's face. I knew he was blaming himself for this. He always placed the blame on his shoulders.
"And what about Fay?" he questioned and I knew he was thinking it would be along the lines of 'she will die'.
"I should be alright if my waters break. The risk for me isn't as bad as it is for the baby. I'll probably make it through premature labour but there are other things stopping me from having a safe labour. My risks are losing too much blood when the baby's born or getting an infection after the birth. I'll need to be watched after having the baby as well because it's another thing I could die from. It's exhausting having a baby Rick, I could die from the exhaustion." I told him looking at Hershel after I spoke. He knew I wanted Maggie to be there when I had the baby. She had promised me that she would kill me if I was going to die and she hadn't forgotten that promise.
"It should be alright Rick. I've been training Carol and Amy to help with the birth and Kelly will be there as well. Plus Beth and Maggie will be there to help, they won't leave her side until that baby's born. Fay and the baby will have six of us there for the birth and I'm sure you'll be there as well. That's seven people and six of them are prepared for this." Hershel stated and I knew that he was trying to ease the panic that had probably set within my husband's mind.
"Should be," Rick grumbled before looking around at the gas station we had broken into for the night. Since leaving the golf club almost nine weeks ago we had been living mainly on the road and staying in random building we had been passing along the way. Last month it was a house in a wrecked neighbourhood, last week a removal truck and tonight a gas station. When there wasn't anywhere for us to hole up we would sleep in the cars, which wasn't very comfortable as we'd have to sleep sitting up. Gave you a hell of a backache. "You should all get some rest. Me and Daryl will take first watch." It was always the same. Rick and Daryl would take the first watch and would stand guard until Glenn and T-Dog swapped shifts. Half the time I worried that the two of them weren't getting enough sleep.
"How you feeling?" Rick asked glancing over to me before flicking his eyes back to the road. I knew he was getting worried with each passing day and week. Soon this baby was going to coma and it wasn't going to wait for us to find somewhere safe.
"Tired, sore, uncomfortable. I'm not sure how much longer this baby will stay inside Rick. I'm not sure I can grow to make more room for him. I'm large enough as it is, I'm like a whale large." I muttered to him resting my head against the window as Carl and Beth played a game of card in the back with Carol. As Hershel had said either Maggie or Beth would be with me at all times so the girl had decided to travel with us for the last two weeks. "I'm thirty-four weeks and I look like I should be full term."
"I think everything will be fine." Beth said from the back leaning forward against Rick's chair so she could rest her hand against my shoulder. "Daddy won't let anything happen."
"Thanks Beth," I whispered wincing when the baby sent a kick straight at my ribs. "Baby's got strong feet," I grunted shifting in my seat to try and get comfortable. My stomach was heavy now and it weighed down on my like a ton of bricks. I felt that I looked ridiculous with this small undernourished body and this huge bump sticking out of my middle. "Where we going?" I asked as Rick turned off to the right slowing down the car as he followed Daryl down a dirt path.
"Daryl's seen something," he told us his hands clenching around the wheel as a house appeared at the end of the dirt road. "Beth, Carol stay in the car with Fay. Carl come with me." He ordered climbing out of the car giving me one last glance before joining Daryl, Glenn, Maggie and T-Dog.
They stood outside the house a little away from the doors speaking for a few minutes before Glenn and Maggie walked off and the other four walked over to the doors. I watched with worry as Carl followed Rick into the house and only hoped that the boy would be okay.
"He'll be fine," Carol assured me clutching her gun tightly to her chest as she glanced out the window checking on the surrounding area. We could never be too careful. Carol climbed out of the car after seeing Hershel, Amy and Kelly do the same thing and started grabbing our bags from the back handing them out just as Rick appeared in the doorway of the house whistling us over.
Carol led the way followed by Beth while Hershel walked beside me and Kelly and Amy took the rear. It always went that way when we moved into a new place for the night. Rick, Daryl, Glenn, Maggie, T-Dog and Carl would clear the area and then the rest of us would go in if given the clear but I would always be put in the middle of the group. They were protecting me and the baby.
I managed the stairs with Hershel's help, looking to Rick with a stressed smile as I walked passed him. It hurt to walk but I wasn't going to let that stop me. This was a place we could stay for the night that didn't mean sleeping in the car and I would take that.
We ended up in what I think was meant to be the living room. There was no furniture to indicate what room we were in but the large fire place let me believe that this would be the living room. I settled down on the floor with a little bit of struggling and help from Beth and seconds later Carol placed a jar of peanut butter in my hand.
Everyone was placing their sleeping blankets on the floor when Carl entered, two cans in his hands. I noticed that they were dog food and felt myself deflate a little. Is this what it had come to? Eating dog food? I could tell that Beth felt the same way as her eyes settled on the two cans and glanced up to Hershel noting that he didn't look to happy about the idea either.
Carl started opening the cans and I glanced to Rick as I felt him move across the room where he had been looking out the window. I could tell from his face that he wasn't impressed and he quickly grabbed the open can from the floor looking it over. It was quiet as we all watched him and I knew that everyone was wondering what was going through his head.
I jumped when he threw the can into the open fireplace and dropped my head so he wouldn't be able to see the worried expression I probably had on my face. He didn't say anything just glanced around at everyone as I lifted my head slightly to watch him. He was telling us all that we deserved more. I was going to say something to him then but T-Dog whistled alerting us to something outside.
We had barely sat down for a few minutes and we were already up again moving because there were walkers. It seemed they had taken a liking to following us the last few days. We couldn't rest much because every time we did they would soon be following.
I grabbed my bag ignoring the looks Hershel and Rick sent my way and ran to the door ready to leave again. Carl, Beth and Carol followed behind me while Rick took the rear making sure everyone got out the house.
I wasn't sure how much more of this I could handle. Always running and not being able to rest. If it wasn't good for me then it was good for the baby.
The cars stopped twenty minutes down the road and I watched as Rick checked the area before climbing out of the car. Everyone followed him and I watched as our usual plan ran out. It was always like this now since leaving the golf club. I would have to stay in the car while a few of the group guarded the area and the others decided where to go.
Beth stood by my open door, an axe held tightly in her hands while Amy guarded the other side of the car and Kelly stood facing the back, looking out at the road we had just drove down. Carl would run to the front of the road, keeping look out while the others would stay on guard but decide our next movements. It was all planned out.
I felt someone's eyes on me and glanced up to see Rick looking my way before looking away and down at the map. I sighed pulling myself from the car ignoring the way Kelly snapped her head towards me giving me a glare that told me to stay in the car. Beth followed me as I made my way over to Rick and Hershel catching Hershel's words as I moved.
"She can't take much more of this moving about." The older man told my husband as they shared a look. I knew the man cared but I could handle it for as long as it was needed.
"Well, what else can we do, let her give birth on the run?" Rick asked him and I could hear the aggravation in his voice. He was growing irritable because he couldn't find a place for me to have this baby. Hershel gave him a sad look as he gentle placed his hand on Rick's shoulder in a fatherly manner.
"You see a way around that?" he asked him before walking off furrowing his eyebrows at me when he saw me standing not too far away. Rick's eyes fell on me then and I gave him a small smile knowing that he would be scolding me any minute for getting out of the car.
"Why aren't you in the car?" he asked shaking away the look of worry on his face as he leant forward and placed a light kiss on my lips. I rolled my eyes at him, wrapping my arms around his neck.
"I needed to stretch, baby was kicking like hell," I told him pressed a kiss to the side of his mouth smiling as his beard tickled my cheek. I couldn't help but sigh out in pleasure at the feel of his beard scratching against my skin.
"He's letting us know he's still here and strong," Rick stated resting his cheek against mine as he held me close to him. The fine hairs on his face sent a shiver up my back and I nuzzled my cheek closer to mine sighing again and closing my eyes as I rested against him. "You like that?" he asked his voice turning huskily as he pulled away and looked down at me. I must have had a hungry look in my eye if I was to go by the way he kissed me after that.
His kisses always made me forget that the world had turned to shit and there were dead people trying to eat us. He made me feel safe with these kisses and I was thankful that after everything we had gone through we still had each other.
"Hey, if you two are finished we should go hunting. I ain't waiting around while the others wash their panties. Let's go hunt. That owl didn't exactly hit the spot." Daryl said looking between the two of us as he pulled a face. I shook my head at him but Rick pulled away nodding at his words. I grabbed his hand before he could follow the hunter into the woods.
"We're going to be fine Rick," I told him giving him a true smile this time. I really did believe that we would be okay. "You'll see,"
I was back in the car again but this time Hershel was giving me a small check-up something he had taken to doing every day at least three times a day. I knew that he was worried about me and the baby just as much as Rick was.
"You seem to be doing fine," he mumbled after he finished counting my heart rate, dropping his wrist which held his watch as he looked at me carefully.
"I feel fine Hershel. Actually I feel a lot better this week than I did two weeks ago. I'm pretty sure that this baby won't stay till full term though. Have you seen the size of me?" I asked laughing at my words happy to see that the man had smiled as well.
"I think you can grow bigger. Hopefully we'll come across some food within the next day. I'd like to get you eating more before this baby comes. It wouldn't hurt." He said ignoring my words as he ordered me around. I sometimes felt that this man was my father and not just a friend.
"We're going to be fine Hershel. Trust me, I said the same thing to Rick. We are all going to be fine." I stated to him feeling for once since this all happened that we were all going to be fine.
T-Dog, Carol, Amy and Kelly walked over then, bottles full of water from the creek but we were all stopped when Rick and Daryl returned quicker than we thought, Rick smiling for once since leaving the golf club. His smile looked true, not like he was forcing it.
"We think we've found somewhere," he told us not giving us time to question him as he ordered everyone to get in the cars.
"A prison?" I asked not sure how I felt about it. Rick glanced to me quickly before pulling the car to a stop just outside the gate, the others following his lead. We all left the cars, bags on our shoulders and weapons at the ready.
As Rick and Daryl rushed over to the fence, Hershel, Carol, Beth, Amy and Carl made a formation around me while Glenn, Maggie, Kelly and T-Dog killed any of the walkers that got too close. I was getting a little tired being treated like a fragile piece of china but I knew that they were all doing it for the baby. They wanted to keep us safe.
"Watch the backside!" Rick shouted glancing back at us before cutting at the fence again, Daryl watching his back.
"Got it," me and Kelly called out at the same time sending each other a smile as Rick held open the fence waving Daryl through. Hershel followed through with Beth following him and I smiled as she reached a hand out for Carl. Maggie slipped in followed by Glenn and Carol followed him as I felt Amy settle her hand on my back as I approached the fence. I glanced down as I entered and tried to hide the smile as Rick pulled the fence further away so it would scratch at my stomach. Amy went in after me, her knife ready in case we needed to fight and Kelly slipped in just as Rick looked back to T-Dog.
"Hurry, hurry," he called out to the man rushing to following him through as the walkers stumbled towards us. Glenn and Daryl rushed to close the fence with some wire before Rick lead us down a sort of alley created between the two fences of the prison.
Daryl rushed ahead of him and I knew that we wanted to be able to protect us if needed. He would never admit it but he cared about us.
Every time my feet dropped on the floor I winced as my hips were shot with a sharp pain. I shouldn't be running, it hurt move than walking but I needed to be done. We soon made it to a gate, a large bus turned over in front of it and I felt sorry for anyone that had been on that bus. It must have happened during the beginning.
"It's perfect." Rick mumbled out looking around at the yard with a hint of a smile on his face. "If we can shut that gate, prevent more from filling the yard, we can pick off these walkers. We'll take the field by tonight." He told everyone and I knew that he had this plan in his head before we had even reached the prison as a group.
"So how do we shut the gate?" Hershel asked and I knew that Rick had already decided what was going to be done about it. He had it all planned out in his head and he just needed to give out the orders.
"I'll do it." Glenn volunteered and I could see that Maggie disliked that as she glanced over to the man. "You guys cover me." He looked to Rick waiting to see if the man agreed with him
"No, it's a suicide run." Maggie said to him and I could see the concern flash across her face. She didn't want him out there but I knew that he wouldn't be doing it anyway.
"I'm the fastest." He argued trying to get her to see his logic behind the words he had spoken.
"No. You, Maggie and Beth draw as many as you can over there, pop them through the fence." He told them point to the fence we had just ran passed a few seconds ago. He turned to Daryl then nodding to the man slightly before continuing with his orders. "Daryl, go back to the other tower." He pointed to the tower we had passed on our way here before looking to Carol, resting his hand on her shoulder. "Carol, you've become a pretty good shot, take your time, we don't have a lot of ammo to waste." Carol nodded at his words before picking up her rifle and following Daryl to the tower. "Hershel, you and Carl, take this tower." He muttered pointing to tower that loomed over us.
"Alright." Carl nodded at his dad words before leading Hershel to the tower leaving me, Kelly, Amy and T-Dog without our ordered. Rick glanced to Kelly, eyeing the rifle in her hands before nodding his head.
"Kelly, go with Carl and Hershel, help them in the tower." She gave him a smile before following the two men into the tower. "T-Dog help with Glenn and the others, we need to draw as many as them to the gates as we can." He told the man before glancing to Amy and nodding at the knife in her hands. "You stay by Fay's side and you don't leave her." He ordered her and I could hear the warning behind his voice. He glanced to me and I knew what he was going to say next. "I'll run for the gate."
His words almost brought a chuckle from me because he sounded so disappointed about it but I knew and he knew that he'd rather it was him than anyone else. Glenn handed him over some metal clips that would help him keep the gate closed and I smiled softly at the man as he rushed off with Maggie, Beth and T-Dog to distract the walkers.
Me and Amy followed Rick to the gate and I watched him carefully as he glanced around, making sure everyone was in their positions before he glanced to me. I gripped the metal fence in my hands, locking my eyes with his and holding my breath as he sent me a nod. With his nod I slid the gate open big enough for him to slip through before shutting it closed again and stepping away.
Amy pulled me to the side fence so I could watch him as he made his way through the walker infested yard. I could feel my heart beating heavily in my chest as I watched his movements through the yard. I was aware of every walker that got close to him and felt myself stop breathing when he came close to being grabbed by one from behind. I was thankful for Daryl and that stupid crossbow when an arrow went through the walkers head. Through all the gunfire and the shouting I almost missed it when Rick clipped the clasps around the gate and locking it to the fence, before rushing into the other tower.
I slumped forward in relief happy when I saw him appear at the top of the tower. If was overwhelming knowing that someone was so close from almost dying but being able to make it through without being harmed. And after everything Rick had been through I was happy to know that he was still safe.
"Light it up!" Daryl yelled waving his hand around him indicating that everyone should just fire on the walkers now. Amy pulled her gun from her hip and I followed her actions, gripping onto the gun tightly as I fired into the head of a close walker.
The yard was full of the banging of the gunfire and when the last shot rang out it seemed to echo through my ears. It was ringing around my head and I felt like it was congratulating us for managing this without anyone getting harmed.
"We did it," Amy muttered placing her hand on my shoulder gently, giving it a squeeze as Carl and Hershel climbed down the tower, Kelly on their heels. Just as they were coming out of the tower door, Carol came round the corner followed by Daryl. They both had smiles on their faces and I could tell that they were happy as well.
"We did," I whispered back as the Carol and Carl walked through the now open gate to join Rick as they others followed me and Amy through.
"We haven't had this much space since we left the farm!" Carol called out spinning in a circle causing me to smile at her actions.
"We had the golf club!" Kelly called out bumping against Daryl's shoulder as she chuckled at Carol when the older lady rolled her eyes. Carol had been right though. We may have had space at the golf club but we never ventured out into it, staying in the building. It wasn't like the farm, because there were no fences to keep the walkers from us.
000
Tonight as we all settled around the burning fire I felt safe. There hadn't been a time since the world went to shit that I had felt safe but tonight I did. It may have been the two sets of fences protecting us from the walkers around us or it may have been because we had all made it here in once piece but whatever it was I was happy.
Once we were sure that the place was secure from walkers, the cars were pulled up into the boxed area spaced by the gate and tower. They were facing out towards the road in case we needed to make a fast get away but I felt like we didn't needed to be worried tonight.
There wasn't much being left behind in the cars seeing as we had used all the food over the last couple of weeks but we were keeping some water, medical supplies and clothes in the trunks in case we couldn't all grab our bags.
The fire crackled next to me and I glanced around at the group happy that they all had smiles on their faces. I smiled at T-Dog's desire to dig a cannel under the fence so we would have a fresh supply of water and my smile only grew when Hershel started talking about farming. I shifted my eyes over to Rick and felt my smile fall as I saw him pacing along the fence looking for any sign of a possible break in.
"That's his third time around. If there was any part of it compromised, he'd have found it by now." Hershel's words felt heavy as I took them in and for some reason I thought he was talking to me trying to get me to do something about my husband's actions. I glanced over to the man locking eyes with him as I gave him a sad smile.
"He's just worried," I told him resting my hand on my bump as I glanced back over to Rick. He always overworked himself. Daryl had gone round the area already and he was on watch with Carol now. They would be ready for any threat but Rick would still worry.
"This will be a good place to have the baby." Beth said leaning towards me, setting her hand on my arm as I smiled at her slightly. "Safe." That one word made me sigh deeply. Would we really be safe here? We had thought we were safe in other places but they always screwed us over in the end. We always ended up on the run without somewhere safe to stay. I glanced down to my hand that rested lightly on the bump and wondered if this would be safe like Beth said. We needed it to be safe. We needed to be safe.
Thank you for reading xx Please review xx Comet96 xx