I am so sorry that this chapter is late - my new busier schedule is great fun this far, but it doesn't really lend itself to fanfiction. Sorry about that!

No copyright infringement is intended.

TapTap

It was dead silent in the Avengers' kitchen. Bruce was sitting at the kitchen table, patiently unpacking Claire's hand from its protective cast, ignoring the way Tony was glaring at him the entire time. The older engineer had thrown more tantrums about the injury than the younger one had, not that she'd been entirely patient either.

Now, though, Claire was sitting silently, waiting for the doctor to unpack her hand, her head leaning into her other hand, with an unreadable facial expression.

"That looks so slow..." Bucky noted, leaning against a kitchen counter, unconsciously making sure to place himself between Claire and Clint, not that it was truly needed - Clint had already made sure of the same - and shaking his head. "You're so...breakable." "We were once breakable too, Buck," Steven pointed out - from over where he was putting a truly ridiculous amount of food into the oven - with a patience which could almost rival Bruce's.

"Maybe you were. I never once broke a hand trying to punch you in the face," Bucky answered grumpily. Claire's sudden, taken-aback laughter was drowned by Tony's sarcastic, "Please tell me that never happened to you either, Capsicle." This, in turn, had to drown out Clint's comment of - in essence - exactly the same thing. Bruce only just won the fight with a sigh, but Steven smiled.

"No, but I did crack five ribs coughing that one time, do you remember that, Buck?" It was Bucky's turn to sigh, so presumably, yes, he did indeed remember that time. Possibly, he also wished that he didn't.

"You people are like having a housefull of infants. I swear every time I turn my back..." Pepper Potts, whose pregnancy was finally starting to show ever so slightly, said from the door.

"Be fair, Pepper," Claire noted, looking utterly zen as she watched the last parts of her prison peel away, "Bruce and Steven are both entirely adult. Maybe even me, on a good day." "Quite," Pepper conceded that point.

"Speaking about babies," Steven started over by the stove, "what are we telling the press? People have begun to speculate about that you may be pregnant, and they already want to know who the father is." "Nonsense. Let's tell them nonsense," Clint suggested, while Tony had tilted his head and looked every bit like the lead villain in any self-respecting film cracking a truly evil masterplan.

"We need to say something which matches," Bruce agreed, but Claire had tilted her head in a way very much like her mentor. "Why?" Noting that everybody was watching her (though Bruce was still looking at her hand) the junior engineer continued with a shrug. "If we all stick to one, resonable story, but not quite matching, that must be the best way to spread disinformation." "Plus, it'll be fun!" Tony agreed.

"Can't we just tell the truth?" Steven looked a little confused. "No." Pepper's tone had gone die-hard serious, making everybody stare. "I don't want my daughter to see an old newspaper fifteen years form now and have some stranger judge her as an accident!" "Good point," Tony immediately agreed, entering into a protective mode nobody would even guess he had. (Except the people present, who knew he did.)

"I'll..." Natasha started, making everybody except Bucky jump as they hadn't heard her come. Smirking at them, she continued, "I'll just say it is my and Pepper's baby and that I am very happy and lucky." She smiled serenely. Pepper smiled warmly back at her. "I like the sound of that. I'll say the same, but I will add that it is Tony's baby by blood - I won't hide that." "I'll just be smug about that then," concluded Tony easily, leaning back in his chair. "I do that well." It wasn't easy to discern where the following snort came from, and it might have been several sourses. (It probably was all of them.)

"I'll say Tony donated sperm and everybody is happy about the outcome," Bucky decided, making everybody turn their heads, unaware that he knew about that technique. He shrugged with a "what?" expression. "I'll go for that too," Steven concluded.

"I'll say that Pepper and Tony longed for a baby and got her, too, but that they decided they were better apart and went their separate ways," Bruce cut in softly. "But did they break up because of the baby or despite of the baby?" Claire questioned him. "Pick one and I'll do the opposite," Clint answered. Pepper giggled at that, and Claire shrugged. "I'll say that I am unsure who the father is if nobody minds - run with the sperm donation line. All I know is that she and Natasha asked the other Avengers."

"Good plan. It could be my baby," Bucky tried to keep a straight face. "What do you mean, it is Natasha's!" Clint pushed, grinning. "We'll give that one to the Hulk. Or Thor. They could totally pull that off," Tony decided.

Rolling her eyes and shaking her head, Pepper went to get some more ice-cream.