Shadow updates the right story! What madness is this? xD Well, this is a pretty short chapter, as most of the following ones will be, as this story is starting to draw to a close. I hope you enjoy it!
Chapter Twenty-One: Past
Eduard woke up the next day to see Raivis Galante sitting next to his bed. His own mother was there too, and she was eyeing Raivis with what seemed to be a mixture of nervousness and pity. There were two men there, as well; a tall man with blond hair, and a smaller, long-haired brunet with nervous eyes.
"Hello, Raivis," he murmured, and the tiny boy literally leapt from his seat in fright.
"Eddy!"
Eduard bit his lip, barely managing not to scream in pain as Raivis hugged him. The younger boy's childlike enthusiasm was ever so slightly inconvenient and painful now.
"You're okay!" Raivis squeaked, hugging Eduard in a most enthusiastic manner. "I thought you were going to go to sleep and never wake up anymore, but you're okay!"
"Yes," Eduard murmured. "Um… Could you possibly get off, Raivis? You're hurting me a little."
The tiny boy backed away, wide violet eyes suddenly solemn, and Eduard lay back, sighing.
"It's not bad," he said. "I just…can't be hugged quite like that yet. Soon, though."
"Okay," Raivis said. "Hey, Eduard, do you know anything about marrying? Miss Natalya was telling me about marrying, but it's a little confusing. A lot of things are confusing me right now, but Mr. Toris and Mr. Ivan and Miss Natalya are all helping me out. Miss Natalya isn't here, but you'd probably like her, since she's very pretty."
"I'm sure she is," Eduard said. "Are you…are you doing all right, Raivis?"
The little boy screwed up his face, pondering the question.
"I'm a lot confused," he said. "Mr. Toris says Mommy was wrong about a lot of things, so I'm going to have to figure out all the things she told me that were wrong. But, you know what, Eddy? Mr. Toris says I'm not ugly! So maybe I'm not."
Raivis suddenly looked incredibly grave, and he blinked solemnly at Eduard.
"Do you think I'm ugly, Eddy?"
"No," Eduard said. "I think you're quite beautiful, and I think you should believe that you are."
"I'm going to try!" Raivis assured him. "It's just, you know, I've got to work at it. This outside stuff is more complicated than I thought."
As the little boy chattered on, the adults began to drift out of the room-Eduard's parents took their leave, saying that they were going home, and one of the policemen, the tall one, went outside to talk with Katya, the nurse. This left Eduard, Raivis, and the brunet policeman alone.
"This is Mr. Toris!" Raivis announced proudly, pointing at the brunet man. "I'm staying at his house right now. He gave me clothes and a bed and a bath and warm food and…and everything."
"Then he's a good man," Eduard said, smiling at Toris, who smiled back. As Raivis kept talking, Eduard watched the policeman, noticing that Toris seemed to be keeping a very close eye on Raivis.
"I wonder if someone will adopt Raivis. Someone has to. How did it take me so long to notice him? Five years I've lived in that house…and I never noticed him until Perri tried to kill herself. So long…and all this time, he'd needed someone to rescue him. But at least he's been saved now. That's all that really matters. Dwelling on past regrets is what hurt me in the first place, and it was the shadow of the past that drove Perri to do what she did. The past is a curse that is best left forgotten."
Ivan cast a glance back into the room as the door closed, and was satisfied to see that Toris was watching Raivis and Eduard with no small degree of attention.
"He will not follow us, and if he does not follow, he cannot interfere."
"Will you walk with me, Katya?" he asked, turning to his sister, who nodded.
"I'm not really on duty right now. So, yes, I'll come with you."
He turned away, and she walked beside him in silence for a while, until they came to a hallway with huge glass windows looking out on the town below them. Ivan leaned on the windowsill, and when he spoke, it was softly, so that none of the passing nurses could overhear.
"Katya, how much do you remember about the time when I was ill?"
She hesitated, chewing on her bottom lip.
"I was hungry," she said. "You cried a lot, and it was hard to get you medicine."
"But you did get medicine," Ivan said, "although you never left that place where we were living. How did you do that, Katya?"
"I sent Natalya for it," Katya murmured, and she would not look at him as she uttered the words. "Natalya told me that since she loved you, she was glad to spend the money she earned on your medicine and food for all of us."
"But how did she earn the money?" Ivan asked. "She was thirteen years old, yes? Where does a thirteen year old girl find work…particularly at night?"
Katya still would not look at him.
"I don't know," she said, keeping her gaze locked onto her hands, which were shaking as she laid them on the windowsill. "I never asked her. She told me it was honest work, and I… We needed the money, Ivan. We would have died otherwise. I didn't dare ask her. I was afraid…afraid of what she might say."
"I know," Ivan said. "But Natalya will not tell me what it is that she did to save. And I am fearful that your fear - the fear that kept you from asking her what she was doing to earn that money - was not unfounded. Katya, what could she have been doing in the night? How do I get her to explain? I don't understand. If she would tell me what happened, wouldn't it explain a lot?"
He hesitated, staring out the window.
"Do you think all of this has something to do with how she feels about me?" he asked.
"Why are you even asking me?" Katya squeaked. "I don't know, Ivan, and you really ought to have worried about this sooner if you were planning to worry at all!"
Ivan drew in several very deep breaths.
"Be silent, Katya," he said. "Not all of us worry as quickly as you do. But at least I am acting on my worry."
Katya stepped back, away from the window, and Ivan turned to face her, continuing in what he hoped was a calmer manner.
"I am not saying that you did wrong," Ivan said. "I am merely saying that I wish to solve this mystery that is Natalya's past. I only wished to ask you before I went to her, in case you knew anything. But now, to Natalya I will go. Thank you for your help, Katya. Continue smiling, please, for your patients. You are not to blame."
He turned and walked away, wondering vaguely what it was that he and Katya were not to blame for.
"No… Perhaps I am to blame. I was the one who was sick back then. Had that not been the case…things would not be as they are."
Raivis felt better, knowing that Eduard would be all right, but he was not sure what was going to happen next, and that scared him.
"I lived in that house, doing the same things, for my whole life. And…it's so scary now! I never know where we're going or what we will do once we're done going…"
"Are you all right, Raivis?"
He opened his eyes, to see Toris standing in the doorway. Raivis himself was curled up under the blankets of his bed, and he thought Toris looked cold, standing out there all alone, even if he did have his fluffy, normal-person clothes on.
"What will happen next?" he asked. "I don't like this very much."
"What don't you like?" Toris asked, crossing the room to sit on his bed. Raivis thought that Toris had the kindest hands of anyone in the world, for these hands only stroked his hair, never pulled it or ripped it from his head.
"There is no doing the same thing," Raivis said. "I always would have to stay in my room before, but now there are so many different things to do. It scares me. I don't have as much thinking time anymore. I don't have time for imaginary-world anymore. It's really funny, because I thought I wouldn't need imaginary-world once I got outside. But now, imaginary-world is nice and quiet and not loud and…and…I know what will happen next in that world!"
Toris was quiet for a moment, his green eyes far away.
"Tell me about your imaginary world," he said. "Tell me, and I'll make it as real as I can."
"I play with my friends," Raivis said. "Or…lately, imaginary-world has been more like talking with my friends. We do normal children things in imaginary-world. Also, in that world, Mommy never hits me. She says she loves me and she makes chocolate chip muffins for breakfast."
He paused, fiddling with the tattered corner of the blanket.
"But in this real-life-world," he said, "we don't do those things. We don't do 'normal'. We go to bright places full of light and people in strange clothing. I like it best staying here, but I would like it better if Eddy was not in the bright hospital anymore. Then I wouldn't have to go there, but I could still see him."
He sighed, closing his eyes, still half-expecting someone to hit him for stating his wishes so plainly. But when he opened his eyes again, Toris was smiling at him.
"I can't make all of those things reality," Toris said. "I can't make your mother love you, Raivis, because I'm not sure she understands how to love. But I can help you make friends, so you can do normal things with them. And as soon as Eduard is out of the hospital, we won't go there anymore. There will be some important things happening soon, though, and you'll have to go with me to them. And you'll need to tell everyone the truth about what your mother did to you, all right?"
"Will Mommy be there?" Raivis asked. "Will she hit me?"
"Your mother will probably be there," Toris said, "but I won't let her touch you. I promise, I'll keep you safe. And soon, if I can manage it and it's what you want, you can come live with me forever. Then I'd make sure you get to do everything that normal children do."
"I can live here forever?" Raivis whispered.
"If you want to," Toris said. "I'd be very happy if you stayed with me, Raivis."
"I want to stay," Raivis said, barely able to hear his own voice. "I want to stay forever."
Toris leaned over and wrapped his arms around Raivis.
"Then I'll make it happen," he said. "You have my word."
"What is 'my word'?" Raivis asked. "Why do I have it? I don't see it…"
"It's a promise. And I promise that I will take care of you."