Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts, its characters or storyline. This collection is mine. Had some fun with this prompt too. Some bad language, and oddly not from Cid this time. Enjoy.

..:-X-:..

021 – Unadulterated Loathing

(For Sakoura'K.A.M; Prompt: 'A game of tag. With Cloud and Leon 'tagging' each other violently.')

"Are you sure this is a good idea?" Aerith asked.

Cid snorted, "Less and less by the second."

The two vehicles sitting in the middle of the Great Maw were massive. The tires themselves were nearly five feet in diameter. The underbellies of them were easily two feet from the ground. They looked like twin hulks of destruction, solid armored sides and all of the glass in the windows was over four inches thick.

"These babies have been tested for speed, durability, taking fire, dealing fire, parked them right on top of live explosives, drove them through the river, up the mountains, through a few solid concrete walls." Cid boasted, "They're beautiful."

Aerith had to admit, they looked impressive.

"This test is for maneuverability, turning, the like." Cid explained. "Leon volunteered and it didn't take much persuading to get Cloud to test the other one."

Aerith watched Leon and Cloud evil-eying each other as they climbed into their respective trucks. "They aren't going to hurt each other, are they?"

Cid took a long drag from his cigarette with a snort, "They can try. I'm banking on it that they do."

The engine in Leon's vehicle turned over with a roar like a bear's. A second later, so did Cloud's, and Aerith almost SAW Cloud's eyes light up at the power under the hood. Cloud's truck surged forward first, gravel and bits of the Great Maw's floor spitting out from under the tires. Then the truck shot forward, zig zagging slightly until the driver got a handle on the controls.

Both Leon and Cloud had been subjected to using hand free radios in the trucks in order to relay observations and opinions through back to Cid, who had the receiver open on the folding table between himself and Aerith. As Leon's truck jerked forward to give chase after Cloud, the radio crackled.

"You didn't say there was no power steering." Leon's voice came over.

Cid depressed the speaker. "There's no power steering, princess."

Ahead of Leon, Cloud was breaking in the vehicle, doing abrupt turns and whipping around some of the fallen boulders that had settled on the canyon floor.

"Whoo, baby." Cloud hissed, skidding across the side of one of the large rocks and leaving a streak of black paint on it.

Aerith grimaced, but Cid snickered. "Them things are covered in dents and marks; the more the merrier…Make 'em earn it!"

Just a little behind, Leon was quickly getting his bearings on the machine and drove it serpentine across the width of the Great Maw. Between him and Cloud, Aerith swore it was like watching two eight year old boys playing with their toys. Cloud zipped particularly closely to Leon's driver side, and the radio exploded.

"Watch it!"

"I barely grazed you."

Cid snorted.

Leon retaliated by whipping around the nearest corner and nudging against the back of Cloud's truck, knocking him off track.

"Hey!" Cloud snapped.

Aerith heard Leon snicker over the radio.

Cloud straightened out and spun around, the tires blowing smoke and gravel against the wall of the Great Maw. He flashed his head lights at Leon, almost like he was signaling 'come at me, bro'. Aerith face palmed. Cid tossed his cigarette butt to the ground and snubbed it out with the toe of his boot, already taking out a fresh one.

There was another crunch of steel meeting steel and Aerith saw that Cloud had skidded his passenger side against the driver side of Leon's truck, quickly pulling away and making an almost 90 degree turn to escape the retaliation. Leon immediately whipped around, chasing after him. He sped up until he rear ended the truck, then quickly reversed and did an about-face, tires spinning as he made his getaway.

"You son of a—" Cloud barked, turning his own truck around to go after him. "It's on now, scarface."

Aerith tilted her head. "So these two are given the most advanced military transport technology in the Alliance, and are given the responsibility of resting its directional capabilities…and they're…playing tag?"

Cid snorted and shrugged, "Yet now we know that it can make 90 degree turns."

Aerith looked at him incredulously, "And if they get themselves killed?"

Cid started to answer, but a horrid noise of steel on steel made them turn.

Cloud had successfully rammed the front of his vehicle straight into the passenger side of Leon's truck, at what had probably been a high rate of speed, lifting it off the two side tires. Aerith gasped, but Cloud just gunned the accelerator, shoving Leon's truck onto its side.

"You BITCH!" Leon shouted over the radio.

"Leon, the truck only drives when it's ON its tires." Cloud taunted.

Aerith covered her mouth with her hands, but Cid waved off her concern.

"Triple reinforced roll bars. He's pissed, but he's fine. I promise."

As though to prove it, Leon activated some mechanism in the truck that propelled it off its side and back onto its tires. From where she was, the force looked like it would rattle anyone's teeth in their skull, but Leon was only letting loose a slew of impressive swear words as he reoriented himself. Then he was taking off after Cloud to get him back for that.

"I thought I heard thunder." Tifa announced as she walked up to Aerith and Cid. "Turns out it was just two overgrown children having a pissing contest."

Aerith sighed, "I think we established that it's a game of tag."

"Who's winning?" Tifa asked, looking out at the two trucks.

"I think Cloud. He almost made Leon turn turtle." Cid replied.

"Which is which?" Tifa asked.

Aerith looked out at the two trucks and realized that, now that she had looked away, she wasn't entirely sure which was Leon and which was Cloud.

"Leon's driver side is scratched to Hell." Cid offered.

"Both sides of both trucks are scratched to Hell." Tifa said, hands on her hips as she watched with them.

One of the trucks barreled over a cropping of rocks. A few Heartless materialized in response, clawing and hissing at the truck. However, the vehicle just whipped around and bulldozed over them.

"Aw yeah." Leon cackled over the radio.

Tifa snickered beside Cid.

Cloud, in the other truck, bounced over a few rough patches of rock, but couldn't escape as Leon used his momentum to smack into Cloud's front left tire, making him spin out. Then Leon was spinning away and roaring toward another group of Heartless that had popped their heads out for a look at the noise.

"Don't start something you can't finish, Strife!" Leon barked.

"I hate him." Cloud said flatly over the radio.

While Leon barreled through the Heartless, Cloud positioned himself and violently accelerated, slamming directly into the back of Leon's truck and sending him forward into the shallow pond on the east side of the Great Maw.

"Fuck!" Leon sounded rattled as his truck went head first into the pond.

Tifa's eyebrows lifted as Cloud peeled away from the scene, but Cid snorted.

"Water tested."

Tifa pointed. "Heartless tested?"

Aerith and Cid followed her indication to where one of the large swamp Heartless was clawing to the surface of the pond. Its large, mucky body was beige and tawny colored, with big, swinging mounds for arms and reptilian back legs.

"Oh…yes, but not quite on that scale." Cid noted, hitting the call button on the radio. "Leon, I might not call that thing's bluff."

Leon's back tires were spewing muck and water from the pond as he tried to reverse, but the tires gained no purchase and the swamp Heartless sloughed closer, looking irritated at being disturbed.

"Weapons?" Leon snapped over the radio.

"Yellow lever." Cid replied.

With a clank, the top of the truck popped open and a rocket launcher folded out of it, auto-aiming at the Heartless. The creature had just lifted its head to look at the new development, when the shell blasted out of the rocket launcher, greeting the Heartless right in the face. The missile exploded and the swamp Heartless roared, toppling backward into the pond, not to resurface.

"Woohoo!" Tifa let out a cheer.

The rocket launcher folded back into the roof and the panel slid back in to cover it. Cloud's truck rolled up behind Leon's.

"How'd you get it to do that?" He asked.

Leon just revved his reverse engines again, sending a mess of pond muck all over Cloud's windshield.

"You're such a dick." Cloud remarked, backing away.

Leon's tires finally gained purchase and he bucked out of the pond, skidding across the rock as he went back to ambling about in the Great Maw.

"Can I have a go in one whenever they get tired of it?" Tifa asked.

Cid exhaled smoke, "You really think either of them is going to get tired of that?"

Tifa tilted her head, "True enough. But still?"

"Sure." Cid shrugged, then over the radio, he said. "All right, that's good. Bring 'em back in."

"What? Already?"

"Ten more minutes!"

Aerith snickered into her fist, but Cid grunted, "Damn kids."

But Leon and Cloud aimed their vehicles back toward the mouth of the Great Maw where Cid, Aerith, and Tifa were. Leon's driver side was beaten badly, and one of Cloud's tires looked low on air, but neither appeared to be driving any worse or to be damaged at all.

As they rolled up, however, Leon let his truck get too close to where Cloud had parked Fenrir, and although the truck had been slowed to a mediocre coast, the tire still knocked the motorcycle completely onto its side upon contact. Immediately, the radio blew up.

"You mother fucker!"

And then Cloud was leaping out of the truck like a madman.

Leon killed his engine and opened the driver's door, but he just stood out of it and looked out over the mud-slacked window rim, with a shit-eating grin. Beside Aerith, Tifa let out a low whistle. Aerith tore her eyes away from Cloud spazzing out over his Fenrir to look at her.

"You okay?" She asked.

Tifa fanned herself. "Yeah, just…men and trucks, y'know?"

Aerith and Cid both looked at her awkwardly.

Cheeks pink, Tifa winked at Leon, who tipped an invisible hat to her. "He's kinda hot when he's vandalizing property."

That was Cid's cue to walk away, taking his pack of cigarettes with him. Aerith just scooted a few inches away. Cloud had pushed Fenrir back up onto its wheels by then.

"You bastard," He hissed. "The kick stand is broken."

"You pushed me into a pond, jackass." Leon barked, jumping down from the sizable distance between the cab and the ground. Mud and water had apparently gotten into the truck, as Leon was currently covered in it.

Tifa glanced to Aerith and any of the other soldiers who had drifted past to get a look at the test run. "Seriously, is this working for anybody else?" She rubbed her neck.

Aerith took another few steps away from the woman.

Tifa glanced over to Cid. "Could me and Leon borrow one of these for a weekend?"

Cid lit another cigarette with a flat "No". Both Tifa and Leon looked disappointed.

..:-X-:..

A/N: The title comes from the Wicked soundtrack 'What is this Feeling', which seems to be the song that always pops into my head when I'm writing Leon and Cloud in the same scene. I love writing the bickering between these two. Also, in my mind, Cloud is a gear-head.

The vehicle in this chapter was inspired by the Marauder, which just looks like a good thing to be driving when you want to DESTROY something.