He's not exactly being subtle about it. No, not at all. I mean how could he, when he is deliberately intoxicating himself to oblivion. The bitter smell of whiskey mixed with the odor of dried blood makes it look so easy to be whisked away from reality, to be easily swayed to forget the horrible events that took place earlier this day.

Oh, if only.

Instead Hanji is forced to keep the man some company albeit reluctantly since he has been explicitly telling her to "leave me the fuck alone". The scientist does not let this deter her from providing at least some kind of support.

The recent loss has hit him the most after all.

Levi had grumpily accepted her unwanted presence, only grunting incoherent slurs under his breath when she tries to start a conversation. It is only when he slams down his fifth bottle of liquor and silence reigns the mess hall for more than a comfortable moment that the scientist straightens her back in her chair, eyes focused on the Captain sitting opposite to her.

"I did it again." He whispers, bangs covering his face, but his voice is loud enough for Hanji to catch his words and she catches her breath in anticipation. "I fucking let it happen again."

The hands that are holding the liquor bottle tightens in his grip and the scientist can see white spots beginning to form. She can see him gritting his teeth in frustration. Hanji does not react, only watches him. He needs this.

"I'm a shitty person, Hanji." At the mention of her name, she flinches but stays quiet. "I fucking let my team down."

"I abandoned them, to fend for themselves. "Levi brings up his face to look at her, eyes burning with regret and brimming with unshed tears. "What kind of leader am I if I keep on leaving my men to die?"

"I'm so pathetic." He bitterly laughs to himself, letting go of his hold on the bottle and curls his fingers into a fist. " I'm better off dead from the start."

"Don't say that!"

Hanji does not know what came to her because next thing she knew, she's on her feet, palms slammed on the wooden table before her and a fiery glare pointed towards the Captain of the now member less Special Operations squad. Levi's now staring back at her, silently shocked at her exclamation.

"Don't you ever say that Levi." She repeats, tone firm with conviction and much more serious than her usual one whenever she talks about the titans. "You're so much better than that. They knew the costs of getting into battle, they knew what they were doing."

"She knew what she was doing."

The man only scoffs at her in denial and sends her a self-deprecating smirk, saying. "Her father came up to me, Hanji. Kept on talking about how she'll devote herself to me, Hanji. How am I supposed to tell him that I let his fucking daughter to die!"

She sighs at him, and relieves herself of her previous tense stance. Hanji only shrugs, not really knowing what to say. After all, she didn't know how to exactly feel in his situation but if it were her, she would have never drunk to forget their honorable sacrifice. They deserved better than that.

"You're missing the point Levi." She sets to fix the chair she used back into its place, hands curled on the chair's backrest and looks at Levi with concern laced with gentleness "Even if they knew they had no chance, it doesn't mean that they blamed you for it."

Levi only stares at her, expression unreadable but if Hanji has to guess he's probably reflecting on her words. She smiles at him, a soft and small one enough to relay to him that 'she's here if he wants somebody to talk to' and turns around to retire for the night. It has been a long day, indeed. Only to stop when Levi calls out her name once again, this time without its usual hardness.

"Yes?" she slightly turns to look at him, and sees him cradling a piece of paper in his hands, holding it to his chest where his heart lies underneath. Where he got that from, she doesn't know.

"I loved her, you know."

It is merely but a faint sound, but it holds so much emotions that makes the words so loud enough that Hanji couldn't help but give him a look of empathy.

"I know." She whispers back, and walks away.