((Alright, I think I should probably have a real warning here. Since it's going to be a bleak, scarring and hate-inducing chapter. And since there's never been a chapter in this story quite like this one. Expect detailed rape. And a lot of guilt and self-hate later.))
I remember waking up to not being able to breathe that well.
"Fuck..." I groaned softly, finding that I really couldn't breathe that well from something wound tightly around my chest and compressing my lungs. I opened my eyes to the pale blue sky of the Hueco Mundo desert, before sitting up as best I could and finding out that I couldn't sit up at all. Looking down at what was compressing me, I saw that it was the chain of Nnoitra's Zanpakuto wound around my chest and lower torso, pinning my arms behind me painfully. I flexed and attempted to throw it off; no dice, the links were harder than steel, and they didn't even budge.
'Something's wrong, something's really wrong here-' I thought in a slowly growing state of panic, well-masked panic. A single voice froze me solid, and I stared up in masked terror at the owner.
"Awake yet, kid?" Nnoitra Jiruga spoke, sitting on the stump of a white crystalline Hueco Mundo tree a few feet away. His Zanpakuto was sitting behind me, and I scooted back enough to use the blade as something to sit up against.
"What do you want with me, Jiruga." I asked him guardedly, pulling my legs up to my torso defensively. He watched me, before starting to smile in a way that I really, really didn't like. "Oh, just thought you'd like to talk." He told me, standing. I watched him walk towards me with a purposeful step, and I gritted my teeth. He continued on, a certain sort of tone in his voice that I couldn't place.
"Ya know, ya really pissed me off back there, kid." He told me, smiling in something beyond mere sadistic pleasure. It was something even worse than that.
"Does talking involve me having to be tied up?" I snarled, already panicking and ignoring his statement. Those horns making up my version of a hollow mask were in my peripheral vision, and I tried to ignore them as he kneeled down in front of me. Before I could move, he seized me by the hair and dragged me forward to where our faces were mere inches from one another.
"I said that you might wanna talk. I never said what I wanted to do." Nnoitra spoke with a certain sort of sadistic purr in his voice, and the color drained from my face at the realization of what he wanted to do with me. I attempted to get free of his grip, attempted to kick him off of me. He caught my foot as if it were nothing to him, which it really wasn't at all. He was the Quinta, after all; I was just some ki...just some Arrancar. All my flailing was apparently pissing him off, because I was dragged away from his Zanpakuto giving me support and he fit his knees between mine, pushing them apart and leaving me spreading my legs in an obscene sort of way. Even if I was still wearing clothes, it was humiliating and it was really pissing me off, and also not helping the terror I was already carrying.
"You're a kinky bitch, aren't you?" He asked rhetorically, still wearing a smile showing how amused he was at my situation. Fuck him being pissed off back there; he didn't look pissed at all.
"Let me go, dammit!" I attempted to shout, but it only came out in a terrified rasp, bordering on an even more pathetic whimper. Nnoitra grinned at that rasp, now holding one of my legs apart with his hand while he used his leg to press on my chest, compressing my lungs even further. I couldn't breathe at all now, and whatever sad attempts I might make at it were cut off as his other hand closed over my mouth and nose.
"I don't feel like it." He answered my terrified order, watching me slowly start to panic even further. I felt the terror of suffocation come down on me fully, the painful aching of my lungs as I came ever closer to passing out again. Right as my vision was fading, he moved his leg and his hand to let me breathe, and I sucked in a huge breath. The feeling of oxygen suddenly coming back into my system was beyond euphoric, and I couldn't help but groan at the sensation.
"You like it rough, don't you bitch?" I heard him again, and then I felt another link of chain wrap around my throat. He had slightly unwound the chain holding my arms to my side and put that as a sort of noose, and with the slightest tug it started that same feeling of barely being able to breathe all over again, and I knew he was taking great pleasure in watching me do this. He kept it tight, and then I felt his reiatsu grow stronger around me and press down on my body, a sensation completely different from suffocation. It was even more terrifying. Why it was even more terrifying, was because some part of me actually extremely enjoyed the sensation of him everywhere at once, pressing in at my being.
"Beg me to stop." He answered my unspoken question of how to make him quit, unspoken mostly because I couldn't fucking breathe enough to form the question. I still couldn't fucking breathe enough to beg, and that was the last goddamn thing I was going to do for Nnoitra. And since he automatically knew what I was wanting to ask, he must do this with a lot of women around Las Noches; use his huge amount of reiatsu to constrict his victims until they were begging him to stop, as he was waiting for me to do now. I felt him lessen the constriction on my throat, giving me enough air to speak.
"Fuck you." I growled at him, and instantly his reiatsu grew exponentially; I would've cried out if he hadn't started to suffocate me with the chain again. At that same time, he grabbed my face roughly and picked my head up a small bit, before slamming it down on the hard rock beneath me. It would've cracked the skull of a normal human being; I wasn't normal anymore. I could take the abuse, but my vision was swimming from the blow.
"Wrong fucking answer." He told me in a low voice, and I knew I was pissing him off with not crumbling like most others did. He knew more about Arrancar bodies than I did, and from what I could guess, was using those 'Pesquisa' things or whatever the Arrancar had to detect reiatsu to drive me to near madness by overloading them and giving me this horrible sensation that he was everywhere. I loathed it, and the equally horrible feeling of not having enough oxygen was only adding onto it.
"Gonna keep pissin' me off?" Nnoitra asked me, and I slowly shook my head. He wasn't letting up with the chain, and I knew that he wouldn't until I gave in. And since I was near passing out again, it would be prudent to at least survive; he wouldn't think twice about strangling me to death, probably wouldn't think twice about strangling me to death and then fucking my corpse, so I had to be careful. He let up on the chain and I sucked in another breath, the euphoric feeling even stronger than before. A long sigh substituted another groan, and I opened my eyes to look up at him.
"Please stop, Nnoitra." I said calmly, in a sort of quiet and seething way, before he jerked the chain tight again and I choked.
"That sure as fuck ain't begging. Do it right." Nnoitra growled, and then let the chain loose again. I took another deep breath, before setting pride aside and speaking again.
"I'm begging you to stop...Jiruga-sama." I spoke plaintively, and ignored the feeling of my pride being shanked in the eye with the words. I needed to live, survive this and then help Grimmjow. And Orihime. Fuck, I keep forgetting her. That was really fucking bad, but I was dredged from my thoughts as I heard Nnoitra laugh. It was a sharp, highly amused barking sort of laugh at my expense, and I gritted my teeth slightly at the sound.
"Jiruga-sama, that's a nice touch. I could get used to this shit." He said slickly, before he jerked forward and his lips were on mine in a vicious sort of kiss. I half-yelped, half wanted to kill him at that moment in time. But with the writhing I was trying to do, he jerked the chain tight in a quick snapping motion, kind of like one of those leashes that snap at the push of a button and choke the dog into submission. He was moving, switching to pinning my legs apart with his knees again and hooking his fingers at the hinges of my jaw, pressing hard to force me to open my mouth. I locked my jaws in an attempt to subvert what he was trying, but it didn't work because he just pressed harder and harder until I couldn't resist anymore and opened my mouth. Quickly, he proceeded to pretty much fuck my mouth with his long, disgusting tongue in a series of vicious forced kisses that I was hating him all the way through. I hated him, but the fucker was turning my body against me. Fuck you, body. He grabbed my horns and used them to jerk my head back for a better angle, and I winced at the unfamiliar feeling of having the portion of a hollow's mask that I held being pulled at. It hurt, a hell of a lot.
The thoughts of pain at having a mask section pulled and jerked on dropped from my main concerns as soon as he pressed himself against me more fully, and I felt a hard length through our clothes. Through our fucking clothes. These were Arrancar uniforms, with the thick material created to withstand the Hueco Mundo environment. This small action brought a whole new reality to the situation, the purest feeling of raw terror that I had ever felt in Hueco Mundo. The only feeling comparable was when I had two mangled hands and Grimmjow Jeagerjaques was holding a cero to my face in the battlefield in Karakura Town; that was the only feeling that could compare to this. I wanted to get him off of me at that exact moment more than ever, and yet the action of me trying to buck him off of me didn't work in the slightest and spurred him on, pressing his waist even harder against mine, grinding roughly. I may have been an Arrancar then, but that didn't make me any stronger against Nnoitra.
I became aware of him breaking the kiss enough to laugh at me, a low sickly amused laugh at bringing the haughty bitch POW in Las Noches down to where he thought she belonged. Under him, apparently. He pressed harder and I truly whimpered this time, closing my eyes before he gave a harsh jerk to my horns, snapping me back to where I currently was.
"Hey bitch, don't you fucking ignore me. You're not blocking me out; you're staying right here to feel it all, goddammit." Nnoitra snapped, and before I could say a thing against him he grabbed the hakama portion of my uniform and ripped it off, tossing it aside. I remember finally gaining the nerve to scream at him, loud and sharp and filled with rage, terror, and so much fucking hate.
"I'll fucking kill you, motherfucker!!" I screeched in an inhumane tone, right in his face. The thing I remember most is how he heard the tone, and instead of being pissed like I expected him to be, he grinned further.
"Good," he told me while jerking down the front of his own hakama and forcing himself inside of me, "You remember that when I'm fucking yer' brains out."
I tried to scream then; he had 'Ohmygawd strongest Hierro' or some shit like that, so he probably didn't feel as much pain as I did. The chain of his Zanpakuto jerked taut again and whatever noise I was about to make went silent in a choked whimper, the distinct feeling of a lack of oxygen driving me mad. I felt him push further, until he was completely within me and I distinctly heard him semi-sigh. He was still a moment before laughing, still leaning over me and I could feel his hot breath on my face.
"Too bad, seems yer' friends aren't as happy about this as I am." Nnoitra told me, moving his grip from my horns to my short silky black hair, dragging my head back forcefully to look at the upside-down shapes of Ichigo, Orihime and worst of all, Grimmjow. Orihime and Ichigo were staring in disbelief, they too trapped in the sand by Nnoitra's Fraccion and unable to say anything that I could hear over the distance between us. Nnoitra laughed again, as my eyes met Grimmjow's. He was too shocked to say anything, too injured to make a move to stop what Nnoitra was doing to me. I think I saw a glimmer of how disbelieving he was at the situation, and I closed my eyes in deep shame at him seeing his expression. Nnoitra jerked my head back to face him, and my eyes opened again at the distinct pain in my scalp from the action.
"Don't look like that; you've gone from Sexta to Quinta. Tons of hollow sluts'd be dying to be where you are right now." He told me quietly, almost lovingly brushing a thumb over my bottom lip. It meant nothing, I never inferred it to be anything more than a way to get to me even further into the depths of shame that I felt as he began to move. Bastard didn't even start out slow; he just started, and I bet he liked the painful burn from the action.
I liked the painful burn. And I hated how I liked it.
Nnoitra fucked me hard. He fucked me so hard that the sand strewn across the rock below us chafed my skin painfully, and I distinctly saw blood spotting the sand in my peripheral vision. I didn't much consider it though; his reiatsu poured inside me with every thrust, and I just couldn't describe how...how euphoric it felt. I tried to remember how much I hated this man fucking me; he was my goddamn rapist! He was fucking raping me right now! I couldn't keep it in mind though, as my thoughts went blank at the sheer pleasure washing over me. I heard the sounds I was making, the groans and the cries of ecstasy. I was really goddamn loud, and if I could have been able to process coherent thoughts at that moment, I would have realized how embarrassing it was to make these noises. Nnoitra loved it though; he loved giving those hard thrusts when I got too quiet, just so I would scream and he could enjoy whatever expression my friends and the one I loved were wearing at the noises.
"From how it sounds, Grimmjow's not as good a fuck as you thought, hm? Get the impression nobody's really fucked you before." I heard him whisper above me, running his tongue along my jawbone tantalizingly. He himself was groaning at times, matching my own. I couldn't respond in the least. The chains around my chest cut into my skin, and he dragged his nails over my bare stomach and chest to leave long scratches and trails of blood, ushering forth groans of pain on my part. I loved it, loved how it hurt. I quickly found out that it was also insanely pleasurable to feel him run his tongue around my new hollow hole, that it was an all-new sensation that Nnoitra was well-versed in taking advantage of.
It was a sort of euphoria that I just couldn't get with Grimmjow. I was worried with him during sex, worried that it wasn't good enough for him because Grimmjow never made a sound. That he was going off to find some other bitch with a better fuck, and leave me alone. With Nnoitra though, I didn't have to worry because the combination of sex and lack of oxygen blanked out my mind of any thoughts at all. I didn't have to be anything at all during that brief encounter. I could just feel.
Nnoitra would kiss me now and then, when he apparently felt the need to. Maybe it was to stroke his ego when I would kiss him back, without qualms. Maybe it was to inwardly laugh at Inju, the slut who was enjoying being raped in front of her lover and friends. Who the fuck knows, I'm not Nnoitra.
He still had a grip on my hair as I came closer and closer to climax, opening my eyes and meeting his singular eye. We stared on at each other, an eternity in that brief moment. I saw that intense hatred towards me in that moment, and I attempted to reciprocate that fully in my own stare. It was that brief moment of clarity when I could remember what he was doing, and I mouthed the words I knew he could read.
I fucking hate you.
I didn't scream when that brief span of thoughtless serenity ended in climax; it was only Nnoitra's reiatsu pervading my system that kept me conscious during the orgasm strengthened by lack of oxygen. I barely even noticed the heat of his release as well inside of me, just laid there and let it all happen. He leaned over me again, moving in for a last vicious, tearing kiss that left my lips bruised and the taste of blood in my mouth. And I heard him speak.
"I fucking hate you too, you slut." He said simply, flicking his tongue along my cheek as he sat up and pulled out. He used what was left of my uniform to clean himself up, before pulling his Zanpakuto and chain up and off of me, cutting up my skin as he did. I was still too far gone to do anything at all other than lay there on the sandy rock, watching him fix his outfit and spit on me before walking off, heading down towards Ichigo and Orihime. And Grimmjow.
I was beaten, bleeding, fucked and owned. And I was exhausted beyond belief, and also still dealing with whatever sort of damage him slamming my head against the rock had done. I couldn't stay awake any longer, and finally blacked out again.
If this was what hollows had to live with, then just kill me now.
((Told you it'd be dark; be expecting another twist either next chapter or the one after it.))