Author's Note: Thanks for your reviews! I've divided the final scene into three parts (the sewers, the shop, and the bake house), but I've posted them all at the same time.
Disclaimer: I do not own Sweeney Todd or anything else that belongs to somebody else.
Scene Twenty-Two: Do You Think He Likes Fried Street Urchin?
(Sweeney and Mrs. Lovett wander through the surprisingly spacious sewers of London, searching for Toby. Neither of them looks particularly happy.)
Mrs. Lovett: I don't know why we're still bothering with this. We've been down here for three hours, and all we've seen is an old guy carrying an unconscious boy, a masked man playing with dolls, and a Chinese dude talking to his pet rats.
Sweeney: (pouty) Hey, that Chinese dude was nice! We should have him for dinner.
Mrs. Lovett: Oh, I don't think that's a good idea. We'll only be hungry again by bedtime.
Sweeney: Mrs. Lovett!
Mrs. Lovett: Sorry. You put it out there and I couldn't resist.
Sweeney: (rolling his eyes) I meant that we should invite him to eat with us. Do you think he likes fried street urchin?
Mrs. Lovett: Be quiet! He might hear you. (Calling to Toby) There's no reason to hide, love. It's not like Mr. Todd is some murderous, razor-wielding lunatic who has every intention of killing you! You certainly don't have to keep hiding, Toby! Definitely don't run as fast and far as your adorable little feet can carry you, for God's sake! Flee for your life…on Opposite Day!
Sweeney: (wielding razor) Yes! Tell us where you are so I can find and kill you!
Mrs. Lovett: (to Sweeney) Why did I even bring you here?
(He shrugs. They continue searching the sewers.)
Author's Note: In the next scene, the Beggar Woman thinks that she is a real estate agent.