EPILOGUE

Always.

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

Castle pulls her into his chest, wraps his arms around her shoulders in a bear hug, and squeezes. The pressure calms her, always has, and he drags her from the brink of a meltdown. He hasn't had to do this since his second hospital release, but he remembers what to do.

And he does not let her fall.

The rest of the appointment is rather uneventful. Kate sits patiently through a pap smear, a flu shot, and another round of blood work. Castle's hand lies comfortably in her lap, and she toys absentmindedly with his fingers.

She is embarrassed.

But he won't let her shy away.

Sweet man.

She still needs a head CT scan. It is hospital policy for patients who have been concussed within the last year. Her hand moves to the bandage at her temple, where the swollen skin still throbs.

"I'm fine."

I don't need one.

"Indulge me anyway?" he implores softly, squeezing her hand. "Please."

Kate sighs in defeat. "Okay."

He smiles. "I am going to buy you the biggest tub of Cherry Garcia I can find when we get out of here. Oh, and that raspberry cheesecake you like so much." He lifts his hands in an all-encompassing gesture, his blue eyes sparkling. "Anything you want, Kate."

Anything?

She bites her lower lip. "Will you watch 'Valentine's Day' with me?"

He squawks in mock disgust. "That is a low blow, Katherine Beckett."

"Yeah, well, you knocked me up," she counters playfully. "You owe me, Richard Castle."

"Me?" he squeaks, before exaggeratedly checking their surroundings, leaning in close, and lowering his voice. "You enjoyed my – you know – 'disappearing cane trick' just as much as I did."

Her jaw drops. "Castle!"

But she is already giggling, wholeheartedly giggling, and Castle grins as if her laughter had been his only objective all along.

The radiology nurse looks like a moderately less terrifying version of Miss Trunchbull from the movie 'Matilda'. The heavy set nurse clears a layer of anesthetising cream from the inside of Kate's elbow, disinfects the skin below, and uncaps the intravenous catheter.

And it is huge.

Like kebab skewer huge.

And Castle is already cringing.

Kate watches him with subdued amusement, and just a hint of sympathy. "You know, Babe, if I was afraid of needles you would need to leave the room. Your face is a terrible give away."

Miss Trunchbull chuckles, "it will be over before you know it."

And it is, sure, quick but painful.

Kate is an absolute champ.

Castle walks beside her bed as she is pushed into radiology and he lingers at her side while they set up. A young doctor hooks her port up to something called a Power Injector and begins to rapidly pump ink stained iodine into her bloodstream.

Her cheeks flush unnaturally red.

And now, even from behind the glass barrier, the scan is unpleasantly loud.

Kate is nauseous the entire ride home, and two hours thereafter. The nurse referred to it as mild iodine intolerance and claimed it would go away without any need for intervention.

Well, except for the surprise steroid shot.

You know, just to be safe.

Kate is curled next to her toilet, now stripped down to a tank top and sleep shorts, with a bottle of Ginger Ale from the vending machine downstairs clutched to her flushed chest.

Her skin is pale now, rather than green, and her recently bared arms are littered with a kaleidoscope of coloured bandages.

He chuckles softly.

And Kate scowls half-heartedly. "Don't laugh at me, Castle."

He sinks down next to her, but not too close, she has made it abundantly clear that she is way too hot for that. "You look like you participated in a rather –" he gestures toward the exposed skin of her arms – "wasteful game of doctor."

She gives him a weak smile

Or maybe it's a wince.

Castle reaches over to tame one of her rogue curls, tucking it behind her ear. "I'm sorry today was so… difficult."

"It wasn't all bad, Rick."

Castle gawks.

And Kate immediately flushes red.

She tries to keep herself calm. She doesn't want to ruin this moment for him – for them. He deserves a happy memory. But she is terrified, and she cannot quell the sudden surge of panic that swells up inside her until… her eyes meet his.

And, miraculously, it quiets.

She calms.

"Don't look at me like that, Castle," she chastises softly.

But Castle is still gaping at her, his jaw adorably slack, and she leans over to pat his cheek affectionately.

"You're catching flies, Babe."

He snags her hand, and kisses the center of her palm. "You've stunned me into silence, Kate Beckett."

"So, you're happy?"

A smile pulls at his lips and she suspects that he is trying not to overwhelm her with his excitement but she could really, really use his uninhibited enthusiasm right about now. "Oh God, Kate, yes," he blurts out. "I'm sorry if I didn't make that clear earlier but I am beyond ecstatic." His face morphs into a mischievous grin and his blue eyes light up. "Do you want to see what I bought?"

"Sure, Castle."

He slides his phone from his pocket and pulls up his email application. She catches the word geek in the order description and she rolls her eyes in anticipation. "I bought Star Wars onsies." His thumb and forefinger enlarge one of the photos. "Look this one is Yoda and it says 'Too Cute I Am' and this one says 'I Get my Jedi powers from my Daddy'."

Kate's throat tightens at the word daddy and she immediately reaches for his face, captures his cheeks with her hands, and presses her lips to his. "I love you," she chokes out.

He smiles. "I love you, too, Kate. So much."

Her fingers scrape gently at the nape of his neck, keeping him close. "I wasn't sure if you wanted more children."

"Until you, I didn't think I did."

To be continued...