(December- Taylor Swift)
How's life, tell me how's your family?
I haven't seen them in a while.
You've been good, busier then ever.
We small talk, work and the weather
Your guard is up and I know why..
Cause the last time you saw me is still burned in the back of your mind.
You gave me roses and I left them there to die.
"And you can't take it back?" Manny asked on the phone with Emma.
Emma was on her cellphone sitting on the citys sidewalk bench and scoffed, "No." She answered, "it'd be rude. Whatever. It's one day, we'll eat cake, and then she'll go."
"I wish I could do it instead, I'm sorry, Spinner just really wanted to bring Taylor to his first soccer game." She said.
Emma sighed, "I get it.. well, it's kind of stupid cause Taylor won't remember nor care. But whatever." She said and looked at her watch, "She should be here soon, I got to go."
"Good luck!"
Emma hung up, and as soon as she did her phone rang. She looked at it oddly but answered.
"Hello?"
"Emma! It's Ralphy, are you outside that bakery we said we'd meet up at?" she coughed a bit after her question.
"Yup.." Emma said, looking around. Where was she?
"good! Jay's on his way." Ralphy sounded sorry, "I got really sick last night, Em I'm so sorry but Jay will know what he's doing! I made him try like a million cakes for our wedding before too." She laughed.
Emma froze.
Wait, what?
And then, across the street, she saw that old famous orange civic pull up. Ralphy had already said sorry again and said bye. Emma finally snapped out of it and blinked, hanging up and standing up as Jay crossed the street and over to her.
He wore his signature V neck shirt, arms still as buff as they use to be. He wore sunglasses and that hat Emma use to love on him
Ugh, this was going to be a long day.
"So I guess I'm your victim today." He lightly joked, crossing his arms as they stopped infront of another.
Emma sighed and he raised an eyebrow, she gave him an apology look.
"Sorry I'm not good enough." He teased. Emma lightly chuckled and shook her head. Maybe it wouldn't be too bad.
She replied, "It's fine. I mean you're not really close enough to a girl and can't gush over this type of stuff but you are a guy and know your food." She insisted, leading him toward the bakery.
Lets just do this.
"You calling me fat?" he asked tauntingly, following after her as she swung the door open and looked over her shoulder grinning
"Your head does look a bit bigger." She joked.
He held the door as they both went in and laughed but winced, "Ouch."
"Mr and Mrs ADAMS!" a Chinese woman stood behind a bakery counter and smiled widely at them.
They both stopped and stared and then looked at another to look around.
"Oh no, he's just my.." Emma looked for a wierd as he coughed awkwardly, "Friend." Emma felt the word leave her mouth like poison.
The Chinese lady looked between them, looking awfully confused but laughed. The laugh kind of sounded funny, almost as if she went har har har, Jay couldn't help but laugh, Emma hit his chest knowing what he was laughing at.
He stopped.
The Chinese woman nodded and pointed at them, "You two look like happy couple. My bad, my bad." She then picked up a plate.
Emma was bright red and looked away from Jay so he didn't see. God how embaressing.
"8 mixes to try. Go have fun." The Chinese woman said, passing Emma a plate who grabbed it and brought it to a small white table with cute little chairs and the two sat.
Jay picked up a fork eagerly and Emma hit his hand, he glared and gave a 'what!?' look.
Emma gave him a dumb look, "If I remember, you're allergic to peanut butter." She pointed the cake she was about to eat and grabbed it for herself eating it.
Jay raised his eyebrows, good save.
He looked at her while grabbing a piece of vanilla cake and eating it, "Thankyou wonder woman." He teased as if she just saved his life.
Emma glared teasingly and they smiled at another. Emma then frowned and looked away, changing the subject.
"So what's good so far?" she asked.
"Depends what you want." Confirmed Jay and the two both swallowed the cake they ate hard when he said that, "What he likes." Jay worded it better.
Emma tried her hardest ignoring that old butterfly and wasp feeling.
"He likes peanut butter mix." Emma admitted, "But I didn't like it." She declared, Jay didn't either, even if he was allergic, hes tasted it before and it was gross.
"Go for the marble." He insisted like it was a mission.
Emma laughed and he smirked as she took it and ate it, eyeing him, but then a smirk creeked out, he grinned knowing she didn't want to admit he was right..it was good.
He knew her too well.
Emma's heart skipped and she stopped chewing. No. No that was bad. Awful even, don't DO THAT! She looked around quickly and grabbed a napkin between them.
Jay gave a confused look until she spat it out into the napkin.
He snorted in amusement, "Attractive." He declared.
Emma tried not to laugh but she had to, it was a little funny, she threw it in the trash near them and got back to business.
"Didn't like it." She lied.
He stared at her with a bit of a tilt to his head but then shrugged, "Ok umm.. Ralphy didn't either, just thought maybe since I.." he trailed off and shook his head, "Try another."
Emma nodded and they awkwardly went back to testing. A few minutes later Emma groaned leaning back in her chair.
"I can't eat anymore and I haven't found the right one." She pouted.
"I'll eat for you." Jay said, cake full of mouth and she laughed shaking her head at him.
She got a text and looked down, Jesse.
Hope cake hunting with Ralphy is fun.
Emma bit her lower lip and paused before she texted back.
Really fun.. she may of found us our cake.
He texted back rather quickly
Told you she was a good idea
Emma felt terrible and put her phone on silent when Jay looked up and glanced at it.
"Jesse?" he lowly guessed and she just slowly nodded. After a moment Jay leaned back and dropped the fork, "Kinda full now too.."
Wierd coming from the guy just shoving it into his mouth a second ago.. Emma noticed.
Jay sipped some water before asking curiously, "Weddings the next weekend after this?"
Emma looked at him and really at him, his eyes, those blue eyes that pierced back into hers like old times as she nodded slowly.
She tried to change the subject as she went through her phone, "Want to see the dress I got?" she asked, showing him her phone picture of it.
"Nah." Jay said, looking down at his drink and tapping his fingers against the glass.
Emma gave him a look, rude!?
Awkward silence.
Emma could really use a-
"You wana go a bar instead?" Jay blurted out.
Emma gave him an impressed look, wow, took the words from her head.. like he always use to.. Emma breathed, god yes, she needed a drink.
"Yes." She breathed and he smirked seeing the desperate tone in it and got up.
"you find cake for wedding?" the Chinese woman asked, stopping them.
"Uh noo.." Emma drifted awkwardly, not knowing how to say they were all bad..sept for the one Jay insisted Emma would like.
"We'll come back tomorrow." Jay spoke up and nodded at the woman who said yes and waved goodbye.
They got out of there fast.
"So you and Jesse seemed to hit it off." Emma declared, sipping her beer as they sat in a booth at a dim lighted bar, but it was casual, and less awkward.
Felt better now, comfortable.
Jay gulped the rest of his beer before answering and she raised an eyebrow, wow.
"Yeah." Was all he said and raised his hand to the bartender for another, the guy waved back and nodded giving him a friendly smile.
"Regular?" Emma had to ask, noticing the easy going feel between the guys.
Jay just shrugged.
"Does Ralphy like it when you drink?" Emma was curious, she hated when Jesse was.. she didn't see Jay drink a lot when they were together..
Jay almost seemed to snap, "Who cares."
Emma blinked and then raised her hands as if held at gun point. He huffed and looked away.
He looked back and mumbled, "Sorry." He looked down again and lowly admitted, "she doesn't know I do."
Emma became curious at that and he cursed himself, why couldn't he just LIE to Emma? God.
He narrowed his eyes at Emma, "She doesn't really know about us either." The bartender came back with a couple beers.
Jay brought them out. Okay. Emma wasn't the one this time! She did grab a beer nervously though and sipped it.
"She knows you went to Degrassi when I worked there though so.. lets not ever talk about why I quit if she asks.. she thinks I didn't get paid well." He gave her a look and she nodded, understanding.
But she couldn't help but snicker, not paid well? Jay got paid double because he was traveled all the way to little Degrassi from Chicago to teach the business ethics he knew and perfected.
"so you work at an auto shop now?" Emma asked, remembering the shirt he wore the first day she bumped into him a few days ago.
Jay stared softly at her, nodding. She bit her lower lip and he seemed to stare at it, "It's mine." He confirmed, looking at his beer.
Emma frowned deeply, her heart sinking.
He did what he told her he was going to do.. only she wasn't apart of it.
"So that's how you afforded Ralphys over the top ring." Emma joked but could hear the jealousy in her voice even.
Luckily he was too out of it to hear and muttered back, "Look whose talking Big Rock." He then blinked and looked up as if he was unsure if he said it or not.
Emma nervously played with her ring.
"Besides." Coughed jay trying to move on, "It's Ralphy, she likes.. expensive things." He said, a bit of a far off look in his eyes.
"I like more simple things." Admitted Emma looking at her ring, it was beautiful but hard bringing everywhere. Got caught on clothes, was hard to write with..
Jay nodded, agreeing and staring at her. She saw that look in his eyes too, almost as if the rising passion they use to have, or better yet, hid deep down came rushing back. They both intensily looked at another until they quickly raced for another beer, grabbing the same one and it fell.
"Oh god!" Emma said squinting her eyes as he fell on his shirt.
Emma couldn't stop laughing, sitting on the mens bathroom sink as Jay had his shirt off, using the sinks water and paper towel to get the beer out of it.
"you think it's funny Cluts?" taunted Jay, raising a playful eyebrow at her.
Emma giggled and tried not to smile, but then the smile was gone, noticing how ripped he got, he was always lean and buff, but now the muscels were begging to pop out and be touched.. or was that just her?
"Cluts?" Emma repeated, trying to change the subject and distract herself, "You're the one who grabbed for it when you knew it was already in my hands."
"Why would I take anything from you?" he teased resting his shirt on the blow dryer and leaving it on there as he walked back to her.
"Because you're mean." Emma simply said, swinging her feet off the counter.
"Mean?" he teased, tilting his head down at her giving her a 'oh really?' look.
She nodded proudly and repeated, "Mean. Meanie head." She insisted calling him.
And his mouth which was extrememly close to hers, grinned, "First I have a fat head now I'm a meanie head?" he asks huskily.
Emma batted her eye lashes up at him, "keep going and you'll be a dic-"
"Everything okay now?" the bartender peeked his head in and they tore apart a bit and noticed how close they were.
Saved by the bartender.
Jay just nodded and Emma looked down, guilty.
God what were they doing? She had to go.. this couldn't happen right now, old feelings rushing back. She needed to marry Jesse.
Why do you need to? Cause you were trying to move on? Look whose right infront of you..
Emma tried to ignore her thoughts and jumped off the sink as he grabbed his shirt and put it back on, scratching the back of his neck.
"Were you going to call me a dickhead?" Jay asked Emma suddenly and she giggled, leading him out the door and he couldn't help but hit her ass playfully on the way out.
Emma's mouth dropped as she turned and he froze, old habit. Old, bad fucking habit!
"I'm SO sorry!" he insisted, looking morrified.
Emma couldn't help but go red but laughed really hard, trying to cover her mouth by just how hard she was laughing.
Jay shut his eyes but grinned, slightly shaking his head at himself and cursing.
"Laugh it up." He told her.
"Oh I am." She insisted, opening the bar door he walked out of first, shutting his eyes tight and not believing he did that as Emma playfully kicked her foot into his ass as he walked and he shook his head, grinning like a foul and turned.
"Would you like me to tell Jesse whose bum your touching?" he teased and she laughed harder when he said bum.
He walked backwards until up against his car where she stopped infront of him and declared, "he woudn't mind I kicked your ass, he'd be happy after he heard you actually smacked mine." She raised a taunting eyebrow up
"I didn't mean-" he shut up because he couldn't help but laugh himself and the two were so caught up in having a good time and smiling at another that she rested her hands on his chest like old habits, and he cupped her face leaning down.
The two pressed their lips together and it came to them that they were kissing and stopped, but didn't pull away. Emma's breath was caught in her throat and with her hands on his chest, she could even feel his heart pounding too.
This was wrong.
But when Jay tightened his hands around her face she motioned for that as being okay and kissed him again, him kissing her back passionately. His hands slid down to her waist and turned her around, holding her up against his car in want, with a thud. Her hands grabbed the back of his head, clenching his hair between her fingers as they kissed harder.
"Mmstop." Emma said between the kiss but kept kissing him back when he slid his tounge into her mouth and flicked hers against his and mumbled against the kiss again, "Wrong."
He pulled away from the kiss breathless and said, "Don't care if its wrong anymore." He panted and kissed her again, his hand sliding up between her legs, into her skirt and she gasped sharply.
The two bashed into his old apartment, and found their favorite couch they liked to make out on, he fell back on it, still kissing her and she landed on top of him, tearing her shirt off.
He panted still and stared at her in need when she took off her bra and gazed down at him softly. His eyes looked at her body so hungrily and his hands pressed her forward to him ,he kissed around her breast and nipping her nipple playfully and she cried out.
She felt him hard already and smirked, she always did that to him faster than anyone and she knew it.
She moaned and he kissed back up her chest when she unbuckled his pants and pulled him out, they didn't spare a second, she sat down on him as he shoved up and she screamed his name out and cried out, and squeeled a bit, so sexily.
He clenched his teeth after kissing her neck and shut his eyes, god it's been way too long away from her, it almost hurt. She panted by the size of him, oh wow, it really had been a long time.. she winced a bit when he pulled out but gasped in pleasure again as he pushed back up her slowly, she then started to grind into him, doing the work and rocked back and forth ontop of him as he cupped her face, kissing her deeply and pulled away, eyes shut and both panting as she fucked him from on top. They were seeing stars and came once, then Emma again second when he only focused on making her feel good.
They somehow ended u[ with her on his dinner table, laying back at he stood between her legs beside the table, leaning over a little and watched with want and love in his eyes, as she was arched back against his table as he pounded deeply into her, moaning and now and then screaming his name. His hand slid up her toned stomach and then up more, to hold her throat, in a gently way and she put her hands on his strong arm, holding it as hard as she could as he gave a few more thrusts and came, sweat dripping, breathless. She was still arched back and jerked from her orgasm and moaned out loudy in the most 'you just fucked my brains out' way.
She started leaning back up, his hand still on her throat til he slid that hand to the back of her throat, and brought her more for another deep kiss, she teasingly bit his lower lip and sucked it as he groaned grabbed her ass while still inside of her, and she squeeked feeling her walls tense around him again. When he slid out and kissed her once more she noticed how much they fucked by how bad down there felt when he pulled out, yet.. as sore as she was, she wanted to it again and again.
"You okay baby?" he whispered, seeing the pain cross her face, and she looked absolutely exhausted. Like she could faint right there, he grinned, knowing Jesse probably tried to make her that tired out from sex and still wanting more. He still panted as well and then picked her up into his strong arms.
They were in the shower now, no sex, no actual showering, just holding in his arms and her head resting on his chest, eyes closed now and then, relaxed..but also thinking. They knew this was wrong, and as Jay ran his hand down her wet hair again and again, they knew they'd have to talk about this.
Emma wore her clothes again and one of his zipped up hoodys, it was cute seeing her in such an over sized sweater. She looked cuddled into it. She sat on his couch as he sat in the chair next to it, facing another as she hugged her knees and thought hard, he leaned forward, elbows on his knees and piercing his lips.
"What do we do now..." she drifts, hopeless. Why did she always go back to him? It was like Manny had said before.. they really were soulmates. She never wanted to be away from him.. but Jesse and Ralphy.
Jay rubbed his face and looked at her, shrugging slowly. They clearly didn't want to hurt them, but it was also more clear they only wanted another and those other two were just the closest thing they'd have to trying to have a good life with what they truly wanted.
Emma leaned her head on his couch and took a deep breath, "Maybe I should go back home?" she guessed, wanting to throw anything out there.
He said nothing. Emma scoffed, he couldn't atleast speak up? This was always his problem, fight FOR HER, Emma screamed in her head
He nodded, looking distant and Emma wanted to hit him. This, again?! How dare he ! What the fuck was he so busy thinking about right now?
"I'll call you later." He told her and finally looked at her, seeing her 'are you fucking stupid?' look and sighed, seeing her get up, "Emma!"
"Don't bother." She snapped, going to his door and slamming it closed.
She was done! Done being HIS play toy. Done breaking her heart over and over when she knew how it ended.
Well now there's him,
And now there's me
The secrets you give
And the secrets you keep
Emma crept into her apartment, and Jesse wasn't home yet, thankfully. She went into her bedroom and then stared at the dress hanging up on her closet.
She leaned on her wall almost in a huff and pouted, not knowing what to do about this. Her mind screamed Jesse but her heart begged and screamed for Jay.
And nevertheless
It's never you let
The more that I give
And the less that I get
Don't tell me to fight,
To fight for you
After this long, I shouldn't have to
Jay was at his shop working while thinking constantly of Emma. He knew what she wanted, for him to fight for her, couldn't she see he was going to break Ralphy's heart because of what they did?
Did Emma think he LIKED cheating? He wasn't the guy he use to be, not since Emma. He had to talk to Ralphy quickly, and he called her, and she was happily going to meet him for lunch today.
I know you're fine, but what do I do?
I know you're fine, but what do I do?
I'm awake, and trying
While you're sleeping like a babe
Beside him
Emma tried to sleep next to Jesse and just felt dirty, knew she was lying about him and her being so happy this whole time.
I mean he was great to her, and she was dying inside doing this to him, she wasn't this type of girl but Jay.. she could never just stay away. She was always forever going to be in love with him.
Jesse didn't have that power over her.
I'm on the ledge while you're so
God damn polite and composed
And I know you see me,
And you're making it look so easy
What comes and goes,
I'd go without
I know you're fine but what about
(Fallout), Fallout (fallout), fallout (fallout), fallout
Through the Fallout
(Fallout), Fallout (fallout), fallout (fallout)