A/N: This chapter is for the ones still with me. I really hope no one hates me for the paternity thing or certain other things I put into the last chapter. Trust me, I have this all planned so I know what I'm doing

The day had started out so perfectly. Having that first Christmas without my parents was something I had been dreading. Any holiday, really, wasn't high on my list of days I wanted. But getting through that first one with Mallory was making it so much more than I had ever expected.

I loved seeing her face light up when she got her presents. I didn't know how she was going to react but I wanted her to get those gifts anyway. The shirt was supposed to balance out the jewelry, even if the shirt took a lot of searching to find. But seeing how much she loved that shirt was worth any price.

I don't even know how to explain my thoughts when I saw Marlena sitting on Mallory's couch. I was stunned, to say the least. There was no way me or anyone else would have expected to come home to see her sitting there.

She didn't mention her husband much and that caused me to worry. Were they still together? Did he know about us despite what Marlena had told me months ago? She said he was at a meeting but that meant little to me. If I knew anything about her husband, it was how much his anger and jealousy got the best of him.

I was so impatient sitting in those hospital chairs. But looking over at Mallory every few seconds calmed me down a little bit. It was almost as if she was there for me even though she wasn't. Not really. She was there for Marlena and it made me even more uneasy as I figured the dates together of when we were together to when she was having a baby.

It didn't seem to add up at first. I couldn't figure it out but I let it pass. If it was my baby, if she was done with her husband, then she would have told me. She wouldn't have kept it a secret and became friends with my girlfriend, lying to her.

My mind didn't connect much when I got the phone call to go down and see the baby at the hospital. Mallory was sad because she thought they were friends already. How could I say "Stay home" to her?

I walked into that room with my head held high, thinking nothing was wrong with what was happening. Marlena looked up at me when I entered the room. "Hey," I said as I saw her face expression. "What's wrong? Where's the baby?"

"He's fine," she sniffled. I didn't know what could possibly be wrong if the baby was fine. "Jacob, I need to tell you something."

"Is he coming?"

It was the first question to cross my mind, especially one that could scare her and make her cry. I had seen that side of her many times.

"Yes," Marlena nodded, as she wiped a tear from her cheek. "He is, but that's not what I wanted to talk to you about."

"Okay," I nodded this time. "But Mallory's waiting for me, so -"

"She's here?" her face was surprised.

"Yeah," I half-chuckled. "I thought maybe she'd come with me to see the baby. Where is he?"

"He's with all the other babies, of course," she smiled. "He's beautiful, Jacob. Looks just like his father."

She was staring me right in the eye. I sat down, trying to process the way she had said that. "Um…I don't know. I don't know what you -"

"I think you know what I mean," she stared still, never breaking the glance until I looked away.

"So what are you saying?" I asked, wondering if she was going to give me an honest answer sometime.

"The baby," she started, causing an uneasy feeling in my stomach. "It's yours."

I felt as if someone kicked me in the gut. I always promised myself if I was ever going to have a baby with someone, I would be there for them. I would do it the right way and marry them if we weren't married already. But this was Marlena, not the girl I was in love with and she was already married.

It felt weird hearing her say that. I had no idea what I was supposed to do at this point. "How – how do you know that?"

"We didn't do anything like that until at least a month after you left," Marlena whispered in a small voice. "The baby being born now confirms it. I guess that's why it was so easy to convince him that this child is his."

"Could he tell?" I swallowed, not wanting my words to get out.

"He has the exact same hair as you do," she began, playing with the blanket on the bed, twisting it into knots. "I think he'll be able to tell something. He knew we were close. It won't be that hard to put the pieces together."

Marlena sniffled again.

"Do you need anything?" I asked, genuinely concerned. "Is there anything I can do? I know I wasn't here for the whole pregnancy part but I will help take care of this baby, if you let me."

She smiled a small smile at me. "I know you would. But I can't ask you to do that. You have a life here, Jacob. What am I going to do? Ask you to give it up so you can take care of your illegitimate son?"

"It wouldn't be like that," I shook my head. My thoughts began to wander on the girl down the hall in the waiting room. I couldn't just give her up and definitely not without explaining everything. I couldn't bear to hurt her with that or by leaving.

"Yes, it would," she forced another smile. I knew it was fake when I looked into her wet eyes. "And I would never ask that of you."

"But the baby -"

"Will be fine," she nodded.

"If he finds out, if he knows," I started. "Then the baby will know about me. You'll tell him about his real father, right?"

"Of course," she said. I stood up from the chair after touching her hand. "Hey, Jacob?" I turned around and looked at her tear-streaked face. "I really did love you, you know that?"

"I know," I nodded. "I really did love you, too."

Just as I started to turn around, she called out again. "Jacob?" I looked at her again, waiting for whatever she had to say. "His name's Simon."

"Simon," I whispered with a small smile on my face. My first born child was named Simon. I may never get to know him well but at this point, I didn't know the future either. I officially left that time and stopped in my tracks when I saw Mallory, crying and sitting on the floor a little bit down from the room.

Her face told me she heard us talking. She was so excited about coming here and meeting Marlena, the whole baby idea. But this was not the face of the girl who walked back in here tonight.

This girl had turned into a young woman who was heartbroken.

Mallory let me take her home. I watched as she cried in the car. It wasn't as obvious as it had been when she was alone in that hallway. She was trying to keep them inside when she was with me. I knew that much just by looking at her.

It felt as if all my fears had came true when I saw her sitting in the hospital hallway tonight.

She asked me if it was true. There was nothing I could but tell her the truth. I didn't want to do this right now and definitely not this way. There was supposed to be the right time to tell her about me and Marlena and the affair. Somehow, after my child with another woman had just been born didn't seem like the right time.

I should've told her sooner.

Mallory asked me all these questions about Marlena and me. When she told me I lost her, it felt as if someone tore out my heart, set it on fire, sewed it up again and cut it up into little pieces. It never felt like this before.

She confirmed my thought on how I should have told her. I knew that but actually hearing her say the words "I can be mad at you for not telling me!" made it even worse. The pain was transparent in her voice. The tears were coming hard again. I felt my own eyes begin to tear as I thought of gaining this child caused me to lose her.

"You knew when you saw her, you knew there was the possibility it was your baby. Am I right?" She asked me, the pain overwhelming us both,

"Yes," I kept my voice low. I didn't know what else to say. She discovered the thing I was most ashamed of doing. Not just that I'd slept with a married woman. That was second to the idea I'd kept something from her.

"Then you should said something!" she yelled at me. I could only let her yell and get it out. "You let me think I was the only person you were ever with that way. And now I find out you were having fucking sex with a married woman and knocked her up? What the fuck am I supposed to do with that?"

I didn't know so I admitted it. "I don't know. I just know I love you. I can't lose you, okay?"

Mallory looked at me like she wanted me to leave already. "You just did."

I was in denial. I couldn't lose her. She was the best thing to ever happen to me and all I was sure about was how much I loved her and wanted to be with her.

I tried to persuade her to rethink her decision. But her anger didn't calm even if she did say how she still loves me. At least my deceit hadn't erased her feelings for me.

She told me not to touch her when all I wanted to do was comfort her. I hid my own pain at hearing those words and gave her what she wanted. There was nothing I wouldn't have given her right now.

It was more than obvious she was ready to cry when I turned to leave. I took one last look at her and registered how beautiful she is. I didn't know what caused me to fuck up so badly with her but I had an idea in the back of my mind.

Because you didn't want her to be disgusted by you, the other half of my brain was telling me.

And it was right. I didn't want that. I wanted her to know the me I was when I saw her again, not the guy who slept with someone who was married. It didn't matter it was a bad marriage. I had no right to intrude on it and I did anyways.

Who was I kidding? I was disgusted even in myself.

I got into my car when I left and drove straight to my home in Baton Rouge. I didn't have to leave for a few more hours but I didn't care. I couldn't stay in New Orleans and know what I did to Mallory. I'd do what I said I would – give her space. As much as it still didn't feel right calling Baton Rouge or my apartment home yet, calling where Mallory is home seemed like the real estate of today.

I could be kicked out of that home.

Instead, I drove as fast as I could without going over speed limits. Getting stopped by cops was the last thing I needed.

Finally reaching the parking lot, my phone rang. My heart began to pick up as I imagined it was from Mallory. It wasn't, though. It was Doug. Shit, I thought.

"Doug?" I answered as I grabbed my stuff out of the car. I was glad I had them in there already.

"What did you do?" His voice steamed with venom as he asked me those four words.

"You talked to Mallory, I guess?"

"No," he sighed, not seeming to calm much. "She called Lois to come over. Lois said she sounded like she was crying. Then I try to find you and suddenly, you're out of town. So I'm asking you again. What did you do?"

I sighed. "Remember how I told you I had a relationship with a married woman?" I could sense him nodding so I continued. "She came back into town."

"Shit," Doug whispered. "So Mallory knows about what you did? Did you at least tell her before she found out herself?"

"No," I shook my head. I heard him sigh and not in a good, relief kind of way. "She heard us talking. There's more."

"What else could there be?"

"Apparently," I took a deep breath. "I'm a father now."

"Fuck," Doug whispered. "Do you have any idea how much you've screwed everything up? She trusted you. I trusted you. I trusted you would tell her about this just like you came to me. You can't be a wuss about things, you know that? If she really loved you, she would have accepted that you slept with someone married."

"I know that now," I sighed. I walked up to my apartment and shut the door. "I know she loves me and I know she would have accepted it. I do now, at least. It was more my stupid side telling me to shut up."

"Well your stupid side is a dick," he spat. "You should have told her. You shouldn't have out this on me if you weren't planning on telling her."

"I was planning on -"

"No," he cut me off. "She is probably crying right now, thanks to you. I know that girl pretty damn well and she does not cry easily. Her being like this right now must be killing her. I hope you know how much you fucked up here."

"I do know."

"Good," he said back and hung up.

"Fuck!" I screamed, slamming my hand against the wall. It didn't cause a hole but my hand started to bleed at the knuckles. I looked at the red seeping out of my skin and just left it. What did it matter? I hurt Mallory more than I'd ever wanted to and I probably lost her for good.

A stupid bloody hand didn't matter to me as much as she did.

I jumped in the shower to scrub the horrible parts of the day off of me, keeping before I saw Marlena walk off that train. Remembering how happy me and Mallory were when the day started and exchanging gifts.

After the shower, I went to sleep. A tear slid down my cheek as I thought it might have been the last time I'd seen the girl I love more than anything.

The next morning, I went right to work and put on a happy face. You didn't come work with animals and look disgusted at yourself.

There was a lot of kids coming in with their parents today. It reminded me of Simon. What kind of pet would he have? Would he have one? I pushed those thoughts aside as I tried to focus on my job.

The days passed slower than usual. Each time I came home, I expected either a voice mail or a text from Mallory. And each time, I let myself get disappointed when I realized it wasn't coming. I deserved worse than the disappointment.

When I was alone, I did everything routinely. It didn't feel real and like I was living a ghost life. It probably wasn't anything compared to whatever Mallory was going through right now. That didn't exactly comfort me but at least it confirmed she was still out there. I couldn't imagine if I lost her like I lost my parents.

On Thursday, I came home to a message. The little red light blinked as it told me someone had called while I was at work. I pressed play and heard a familiar voice.

"Jacob?" Lois' voice almost stuttered. "Is this the right number? I hope so. You should make your own answering machine message. I would have called your cell but I didn't want to bother you at work. Something happened, Jacob."

"There was an angry customer at work," she continued. "I guess Allison wasn't that into her job this week and he got mad. He hit her a few times and she got taken to the hospital. I know things aren't good between the two of you right now, but…if something happened to Doug and we weren't speaking, I'd want to know. Just, come as soon as you can."

The message cut off. Mallory was physically hurt. Someone had attacked her. Who could something like that to her?

My mind started to race a mile a minute as it stopped on one name. August. What if he found out about the baby and put me and Mallory together? Would he go after her? Of course he would. That guy was impossible to control and it seemed to fit. But it just didn't that he did it at the club.

Unless he wanted no one to piece it together as an attack on her. God knows what he could do to her, how he would have hurt her. He knows I could put it together and he wanted me to feel pain.

But whether it was him or not, one thing was clear. I made a quick call to Mr. Jenkins and told him an emergency had happened to someone close to me. He didn't ask many questions, probably hearing the panic in my voice. I thanked him gratefully and grabbed my bag again. After stuffing more clothes in it, I rushed out the door with the keys in my hand.

Mallory needed me and I needed to make sure she was okay. Nothing was more important to me than her.

A/N; Okay, please no one kill me yet! I know two chapters in a row didn't end good. I know. *shakes head in shame* But, there is a plan here. Stay with me?

Leave a review?