Chapter twenty
The life-changing sentence
Sakura, Ino and TenTen exited the locker room laughing at some joke Ino had made. Their shifts were over. They had already changed into their casual outfits, and were planning on going to their favorite coffee shop to have some warm, comforting drinks and relax there, just like the old times. Sakura realized she missed those good old times when she didn't have to worry about anything but her grades, her friends and her appearance. She would have given anything to go back to those times, but she knew that was impossible. Her life had changed drastically, and things were getting harder, but that was just part of growing up, of maturing, and there was nothing she could do but toughen up and go through it.
They were exiting the kitchen when someone suddenly called Sakura's name. The girl turned around and her stomach sank when she saw it was the Housekeeper calling her. She remembered about the incident earlier that day, about the broken plate, about that torturing, unnatural thirst, and about Sasuke. It was all in the past, but Sakura was still embarrassed.
And now she had to pay the consequences of her clumsiness. It was just a broken plate, probably not that expensive, but still, it wasn't nice to lose money.
"Hello, girls," the Housekeeper greeted them, polite as ever. "I see your shift is over and you are about to leave, but I would like to have a few words with you, Sakura. Would you mind?"
"Um, not at all," Sakura replied, smiling through her uneasiness.
"Is everything okay?" Ino asked, stepping in protectively.
"Yes, do not worry, Ino," the Housekeeper said calmly. "It's just about a small incident that happened. It will only take a few minutes."
"I'll tell you about it later," Sakura told her friends. "Wait for me in that car. I'll be right there."
Ino eyed her suspiciously, but reluctantly left with TenTen. Sakura hated to concern her cousin if it wasn't necessary, but now was not the time to explain everything. Besides, there were a few details that ought to be said to the blonde in private, and those had to wait a bit more.
"Follow me to the entrance hall, Sakura," the Housekeeper said a few moments after the girls were gone. "The kitchen is not a very nice place to have a conversation."
Sakura nodded and let the woman lead her to the entrance hall. Her friends were already gone, so she didn't see them there. She and the Housekeeper sat on the couch, like two old friends about to catch up with their lives after years of not seeing each other. The situation itself was not uncomfortable at all, since the Housekeeper did not seem angry and was actually acting very casual and friendly. However, Sakura was tense because she knew there was more behind breaking that sole plate. She knew what had happened afterwards. She could have killed that maid, or a few other humans, and that made her feel guilty.
"You're not in trouble, child," the Housekeeper said, smiling kindly at her. "It's just about the broken plate. Don't be so nervous."
Sakura sighed, willing herself to calm down. Everything was okay now; there was nothing to worry about. "I know," she said. "Still, I'm very embarrassed. I'm sorry for being so clumsy, ma'am."
"Happens to anyone, especially if you're still young and inexperienced," the woman replied. "Just try to be more careful the next time."
"I don't think there's going to be a next time," Sakura confessed. "I won't work in the kitchen ever again. The two only times I have done it haven't been very nice. It's just too dangerous for a hematophobic to be anywhere near sharp objects." Actually, for a young half-breed vampire to be anywhere near humans, she thought. "Besides, I won't stay here forever. I have other things to do with my life," she added, thinking of the way the vampire society saw half-breeds, of how any other vampire would not hesitate to kill her as soon as they find out what she was, of how she was doomed to hide for the rest of her life.
"Alright," the Housekeeper said, nodding. "I wish you the best of luck with whatever you are planning to do in the future, Sakura. You seem to be a good girl, and very smart."
"Thanks a lot." She smiled genuinely. In spite of her stern appearance, the Housekeeper really was a good person. "Anyway, how much do I have to pay for the broken plate?"
The Housekeeper gave her the quantity and told her she could take her time to pay if she didn't have the money yet. Sakura assured her she would pay it in tomorrow, and the woman accepted the agreement.
The brief conversation was over. Sakura rose to her feet and thanked the woman once again for her kindness. Then, she said goodbye and headed for the door to meet her friends, who waited in the parking lot for her to go out so that they could finally go to the coffee shop and chill for a couple of hours.
Sakura reached out for the door's handle, but her fingers had barely brushed it when the door was abruptly opened from outside. She stepped back, startled, and looked up at the person stepping into the house. Her breath got stuck in her throat immediately. It was Sasuke.
"Oh, sorry," she muttered, stepping back and avoiding eye contact. His presence made her feel self-conscious, as if he had accidently seen her naked and she couldn't forget it. Metaphorically speaking, maybe he had seen her naked. He had seen her as a vampire – a bloodthirsty, panicked vampire, which was more or less the same as being unclothed: both exposed her real self.
"Move, half-breed," he grumbled, snapping her out of thoughts.
Sakura looked up then, and glared. What a rude jerk! In spite of everything that had happened, in spite of the mistakes she had made, and in spite of what she was and what he was, he had no right to be so impolite. It was not okay. She felt offended.
In another situation, she would have spat an insult back or something of the sort. But then again, she didn't have the right to do that, either. Also, perhaps he was just still mad at her for all the trouble she'd caused. Sakura herself was still mad at herself, so why wouldn't he? Besides, it was better if she didn't lower herself to his level.
"Sorry," she repeated, stepping aside. Sasuke didn't even look at her as he brushed past her and headed into the entrance hall.
Sakura turned around and, before she could think twice about it, she called, "Um, Sasuke?" She realized that was the first time she'd ever called him by his name. It felt strange, somehow.
He stopped walking and glanced at her disdainfully over his shoulder. "What?"
"I wanted to apologize for what happened – again. Also, I want you to know that I'm very grateful, even if your intentions weren't exactly the best. Despite everything, you saved me from a very ugly situation."
Sasuke stared at her for a long moment, and then hesitantly turned his full body to her. He sighed deeply, closing his eyes. His shoulders slumped as if he had decided to give up on something. "Yeah, it's fine," he said lowly. "I suppose there's no use on hating you for it all my life. At least nothing bad really happened."
"I promise I'll be way more careful," Sakura said. "I already know what I need to know, so don't worry. Besides, you know I won't stay here for much longer now that I'm, well, not the same I used to be before. I know it'd be too dangerous, for me and for your family."
Sasuke eyed her thoughtfully. She thought he would say something about her leaving, but he didn't. Instead, he said, "You just keep that promise while you work here. I know all this is really hard for you, and it would be unfair to put you under even more pressure." His dark eyes softened, and Sakura was surprised by the way the sudden gentleness of his gaze made her insides feel. She knew he just pitied her, but it was still nice to know he at least cared. She wanted him to care.
Frightened by the direction her thoughts were taking, she sighed and focused back on the conversation. "Okay. Thanks – again. Um, well… I gotta go. Bye."
Sakura turned around and hurriedly stepped out of the house. She didn't dare to look back at Sasuke – she just closed the door behind her, and ran to Ino's car.
The next day, Mikoto Uchiha woke up with the realization that it was time for her to have a long, deep conversation with Sakura. She'd wanted to talk to her ever since the girl's instincts awoke, but hadn't seemed to have time. Today, however, she wouldn't be very busy. It was the perfect moment.
Mikoto was a very organized woman. She had every activity in her day scheduled neatly. That morning she did the usual on a free day: she woke up at eight, took a bath, dressed in the day's color (today it was blue), went downstairs, and had breakfast with her husband and her sons. They chatted little, and then each of them took different directions: Sasuke went to his morning lessons, Itachi went to the library to pick up some books, Fugaku headed off to the company, and Mikoto went to her "office" and entertained herself by working on her latest outfit: an orange silk dress perfect for warm evenings.
By ten o'clock, she was done with the dress' sketches, and it was time for Sakura's shift to start. There was a knock on the door, and Harumi, the Lady's maid and Mikoto's personal assistant, poked her head into the room.
"Miss Sakura is here, madam," the young woman said. Mikoto had ordered her to let her know when the girl arrived, so that she could go downstairs and call her to her office personally.
"Very well, thank you," Mikoto said, standing up from her comfortable chair. She walked towards the door the maid was holding open for her, and stepped out of the room. Harumi followed her silently, always like a shadow, a human shadow Mikoto trusted and relied on as much as she was allowed to.
They walked down the stairs and then waited in the entrance hall, where they had a clear view of the stairs Sakura would surely walk to start working. Mikoto sat on the couch, crossed her legs and waited patiently.
Finally, three girls exited the dining room laughing and smiling, carrying with them that beautiful breeze of youth and enthusiasm for life. They were Ino, TenTen and Sakura. TenTen was the first to spot Mikoto when they passed by the entrance hall, and she stopped and smiled widely.
"Oh, good afternoon, madam," she said, bowing respectfully. Mikoto thought she was a very good girl with a lovely attitude that guaranteed a bright future. Maybe the Namizakes had seen that too, and that was why they had decided to adopt her. Truthfully, Mikoto didn't know the story behind that adoption, but she would make sure to ask the werewolves about it when she saw them again.
Ino and Sakura stopped as well, and they offered her the same polite greeting. Mikoto smiled kindly at them and said, "Hello, girls, glad to see you have arrived. You ready for another day?"
"Um, we guess so," Ino said, grinning sheepishly. "It won't be easy, but that money ought to be earned, right?" she laughed.
"That's right." Mikoto rose to her feet and stepped towards them. She examined their young, beautiful faces, and stopped on Sakura's. "Sakura, darling, I would like to have a few words with you," she said softly, gently, so that she wouldn't alarm the girl.
Sakura seemed to understand what it was all about almost instantly. Still, she pretended she didn't. "Is everything alright?" she questioned, her smile turning uneasy.
"Yes. You're not in trouble or anything. I just want to talk to you."
The girl glanced at her friends. TenTen seemed curious; Ino seemed to know what was going on, but she decided not to intervene. Finally, Sakura nodded. "Okay. Right now?"
"Yes, please follow me to my office," Mikoto said and, without further explanation, headed up the stairs, Harumi trailing behind as always.
Sakura hesitated a little before following them. Mikoto heard her say to her friends, "Okay, I'll see you guys on the break," her tone slightly nervous, and then she started walking.
"I'm really not in trouble, am I?" Sakura asked anxiously. She was sitting on a leather couch in Mikoto's office, the small room where she designed her clothing. Said woman sat on the couch across from her; she was holding a cup of green tea her personal maid had prepared (Sakura knew serving the tea was her job, but it appeared that right now she was off duty).
They were alone. It was a completely private conversation, which intimidated Sakura a little. Mostly, it intrigued her. What was all this about? The plate she broke, perhaps? No, that was an issue too small to be taken this seriously. It had to be something more important. Perhaps Mikoto had heard about yesterday's incident from Sasuke, and now she wanted to scold her or something.
"Of course not," Mikoto answered, smiling lightly before bringing the cup to her lips and taking a brief, delicate sip. Sakura felt jealous of how every single of the woman's movements was so graceful and feminine. She wondered if she would be a little like her when she grew older – if she grew older, because being a half-breed vampire in this world apparently implied living in a constant danger. It was not a secret that, if any other vampire knew about her, they would kill her. The thought was terrifying, but Sakura had already grown used to it – used to fear for her life.
"Then what do you want to talk to me about?"
Mikoto put the cup on its plate and the plate on the coffee table between her and Sakura. She then looked straight into the girl's eyes. Sakura could see her reflection in the vampire's dark gaze: a floating white face framed by light pink hair. She also noticed the resemblance between those eyes and Sasuke's. Mikoto was definitely his mother.
"First of all, I want to know how you're doing," Mikoto said. "Please know that you can trust me. I will listen to you and advice you, even. I want you to know that I support you entirely."
Sakura was moved, but also puzzled. She thought for a moment, and then replied, "Thank you, madam. You are very kind. Frankly, I do desperately need people there for me, supporting me. What I'm going through… it's not pleasant."
"I know," Mikoto nodded. "That's why I'm telling you this. If you need to talk, we'll talk. You can let it out all out, and I will stay here and listen attentively, without judging."
Sakura offered a small, sad smile. "Why are you so nice to me? Are you like this to everyone? I really appreciate it, don't get me wrong. It's just that, well… I'm not very used to people I barely know being so nice to me."
"No, I'm not like this to everyone," the woman replied. "And actually, that's also something I want to talk to you about. I'm nice to you because you mean a lot to me. I do know you, even if you don't know me very well."
The half breed frowned slightly. "You mean you've met me before all this? When I was a little girl, perhaps?"
"Your mother used to be my best friend, Sakura. We knew each other since we were little girls. I was there for her in her hardest moments, just like she was there for me in mines. I was the one she turned to when she found out she was pregnant."
Sakura blinked several times, disbelieving. But Mikoto could not be lying, could she? Why would she? "Are you serious?"
"Yes. I have known you ever since you were in Hikari's womb. Since she was like a sister to me, you're more or less like a niece to me. I haven't been around during most part of your life until now, but I always thought about you, you know? I thought about you as much as I thought of my best friend. I miss her, and you remind me a lot of her. That's why I am so fond of you."
Sakura was baffled, but she still managed to say, "Thank you." It was comforting to know Mikoto cared so much about her. Also, she realized that, now that she knew that Mikoto and Hikari had been very close, she was seeing the dark haired woman with other eyes. Suddenly, Mikoto reminded her of her mother, and therefore, she was starting to appreciate her as more than just a very kind boss.
The woman reached out and grasped her hand tightly, but without hurting her. Her skin was very warm and almost as soft as a baby's. "She would have wanted me to look out for you," she said, her eyes teary. "I haven't been able to do it before, but I think it's more important that I do it right now. Please let me take care of you, Sakura. I feel like you owe it to your mother."
"You don't have to," Sakura said softly. A lump was forming in her throat; this was just too much for her.
"Of course I do." Mikoto let go and straightened her back. "Like you said, you need support. Let me offer it to you."
"But you may get in trouble because of it! I'm a half breed vampire: a being that shouldn't exist. I don't want you to get in trouble because of me. I mean, it's not as if I'm really..."
Mikoto shook her head, cutting her off. "Worth it? Oh honey, of course you are. You're worth that and so much more, not just because you're Hikari's daughter, but because you've such a beautiful soul. Maybe you don't believe it, but I am saying the truth."
Tears were already spilling from Sakura's eyes. The knot of anxiety in her stomach was loosening little by little. She paused a few moments, trying to calm down a bit, and then she looked up at Mikoto and asked in a very small voice, "What was she like? My mom, I mean."
Mikoto was crying too, but there was a sweet smile on her face. "Oh, she was wonderful, sweetie: a wonderful friend, a wonderful daughter, a wonderful sister, and of course, a wonderful mother. She loved you and your father with all her heart. She'd always been too affectionate, ever since she was a child. I remember that she cried for days when her pets died. I used to think she was just too dramatic, but in reality, she just had a very sensible soul, and that made her beautiful."
Sakura smiled through her tears, recalling the face of that pretty blonde, smiling woman in the picture she kept in her diary. "And my dad?" she asked. "Did you know him too?"
"Not as well as I knew Hikari, but well enough. You remind me a little of him, too. He was a very kind and smart man, always reading books or making people laugh. His personality made him shine like a sun. Hikari fell in love with him as soon as she saw him, or so she told me. It was love at first sight. He loved her and you very much. You cannot imagine how hard he fought for you, to make you happy. You and your mother were his whole world."
Sakura covered her face with her hands and sobbed, unable to keep it together for a second longer. Behind her closed eyelids, vague images of her parents' faces came into focus: the beautiful woman with the golden hair, and the brunette man with eyes as green as her own. Sakura loved them, even if they had been absent for most part of her life, even if she didn't remember them very well, even if they were practically complete strangers to her. She loved them, and missed them, so deeply that her heart ached as if a large hand were squeezing it furiously.
But behind that vast emptiness in her chest, there was also a small but fierce flame of hatred burning. She loved them, but hated them a little at the same time. She hated them for leaving her, for letting her exist, and for not being able to come back to her side. She wished they would. She needed them more than ever.
Mikoto took her hand again, and her touch brought her back to reality. "Sakura," she said, "I know this has been very hard to accept. I'm very sorry you have to go through all this, but things are just the way they are. No one chose this, especially not you."
"My parents did," Sakura sobbed. "They chose to let me be born. They wanted me to be born, even though they sure as hell knew I would just come to this world to suffer, because I'm not normal – not a normal human, not a normal vampire. Still, they had me. Maybe they just wanted a baby to play with. Maybe they were just two stupid, selfish brats."
The woman shook her head fiercely. "No, don't say that. They were very smart, and they were not selfish. They loved you. They were very good people, Sakura."
"Then why did they do it? Why did they have me? I wasn't supposed to be born!" She bit her lip, fighting the urge to scream her rage out.
Mikoto let go, took a deep breath and stared sadly at her lap. "No one knows," she said softly. "I'm sorry." She looked back up. Anguish was still clear in her eyes, but now it was mixed with strong determination. "Please, don't lose hope, Sakura. You have so much support. You have enemies, yes, but care only about the people on your side. You are lucky despite everything else."
The girl chuckled humorlessly. "Lucky? I'm everything but that."
"Just be strong, darling," Mikoto went on. "Life goes on no matter what. Always remember who you are, not what you are, even if others do not."
That last sentence touched something in the bottom of Sakura's heart. She had no idea it would stick to the back of her mind for a very long time, and change her life from then on.
Mikoto stood up, wiping her tears with a white handkerchief. Sakura stood up as well. "Well," the woman said in a more casual tone. "I've already taken enough of your time. You must get back to work."
Sakura nodded. Wordlessly, she followed the dark haired vampire to the door. Before stepping out of the room, she said, "Thank you, Mrs. Uchiha. For everything you did, do and will do for me. I… I hope I can pay you back for it someday."
Mikoto smiled. "Don't worry about, honey. The best thing you can do for me is to not give up. Make your parents proud."
Biting her lip tightly, Sakura nodded again and left.
Notes: Okay, it's been almost a year since I last updated. I am truly sorry. I've been busy having a life. Many things have happened and, well, I kind of forgot about this story, which is indeed terrible, since I enjoy writing it very much. Actually, I enjoy it so much that I promise I'm going to keep writing until spring break is over, and maybe even after that. Please be patient in case I break this promise. I swear this story will be finished someday.
Anyway, I love you, reader. Please don't forget that. :')