"You'd think it would help me to focus on somebody else's past," Steve mumbled, dropping his head into the palm of his hand. He stared at the grade on the history quiz he had just gotten back, knowing it was low because he sometimes struggled to concentrate.

He opened his history textbook and put the quiz facedown between the pages, not wanting to look at it anymore. He picked up the book and the rest of his belongings before heading out into the hallway.

Steve went to his locker, putting in the numbers on the combination lock, popping it open. His hand gripped the locker door, his eyes widening, as he felt an arm slide around his waist. He tensed, his other hand still holding his history book.

"I'm sorry," Evie said. "Did I scare you?" She withdrew her arm, taking a step back.

Steve turned his head to look at her, not letting go of the locker door. "No. I just didn't see you there." He put his history book in the locker, pulling out his science book.

"Are you sure?"

Steve nodded, his eyes on the inside of the locker. "Yeah, it's fine."

Evie took a step closer, leaning to meet Steve's gaze. "Sweetie, it's okay if I did scare you. You can tell me."

Steve took a step away from the locker, as he slammed it shut. "Okay. You kind of did. But it's just because I didn't realize you were next to me. Sorry."

"It's okay, Steve." Evie reached out and squeezed his hand.

Steve squeezed her hand back. "Actually, I wanted to ask you if I could come over later. I have to work this afternoon, but right after that."

"Sure. I'll be home."

Steve moved closer to Evie, glancing around the hallway, as he spoke in a lower voice. "I want to tell you what I tried to before about, you know, the night I had the flashback. I think I can now, and you should know."

"Man, I am ready to go," Soda said, taking off his DX cap and rubbing his head.

Steve nodded, as he opened a box and started putting more candy bars on a shelf. "Yeah."

"Darry's wanting me to make dinner tonight. I think he won't be home til late though." Soda took a Pepsi from the refrigerator and dug in his pocket for some change. He pulled out a few coins, counting. "Hey, I thought I had more than that."

Steve moved to the next shelf, adding packages of crackers to it. "Yeah."

"Hey, Stevie, you got a quarter?"

Steve didn't look up. "Yeah, sure."

Soda grinned at his friend. "I ain't just asking out of curiosity, man."

Steve looked from the shelf to Soda. "Oh. Sorry." He pulled a quarter from his pocket and tossed it to his friend.

Soda caught the coin, adding it to the change in his hand. "Are you thinking about something there?"

Steve closed the box and picked it up, moving it behind the counter. "I told Evie I wanted to talk to her about something tonight, and now, I wonder if I shouldn't have."

Soda put the change for the Pepsi in the cash register, then went to punch out. "You nervous about talking to her?"

"I guess. It's just it's something I think she should know, but it's not easy to talk about. Not that anything has been lately. I don't want to cause any more problems between us. I've done that enough."

Soda paused in front of the counter, picking up the Pepsi and beginning to twist the cap off the top. "You know what I'm going to say to that, don't you?"

Steve shrugged. "I don't know. Should I?"

"You didn't cause any problems, buddy. You can't keep putting that on yourself."

"You can do this," Steve told himself, as he spotted Evie on the swing in her backyard. He waved, walking closer.

Evie stood up, meeting Steve in the middle of the yard. "Hey, you want to talk here, or go somewhere else?"

"Here's fine. I don't think it really matters."

Evie took Steve's hand in her own, leading him over to the swing. "Are you sure you're okay with talking about this?"

Steve nodded, sitting down beside Evie, but pulled his hand away. He fidgeted with a button on his DX shirt, looking down at it. "I thought I could handle it. Even when I didn't feel quite right, I thought I could stop it from getting to me too much."

"What are you talking about, sweetie?"

It's just Evie, Steve thought. You can tell her. "When we almost slept together. I tried to be okay. I wanted to be." He let his eyes gaze into hers. "But when I froze, I think it had something to do with you pushing me down onto the couch."

Evie looked down. "Oh."

"I'm not saying that's the only reason or anything, just that it's part of it. That was the second I knew I needed to stop, that I just couldn't..." Steve turned to face the other direction, his back to Evie.

"I don't know what to say. Except I hope you know I wouldn't make you do anything. I wasn't trying to be like- Well, I wouldn't be like that. I just wanted to kiss you and be with you."

"I do know that. I just can't handle anything that is like control or even reminds me of it. But I know that, I swear." Steve's voice started to waver. "I'm sorry. I'm telling you this because I want you to know it's not only about you touching me or even just about being close like we were."

"It's okay. I think I see. I understand."

"I think I understand how you could kiss somebody else after all of that."

Evie scooted closer to Steve. "I'm still sorry that happened."

"I'm still struggling with believing you could want me and love me now, you know?" Steve felt himself trembling. "Cause why wouldn't you want someone else?"

"Oh, Steve." Evie laid her head on the back of Steve's shoulder, wrapping one arm around him from behind. "Cause no one else is you, sweetie."

Steve gripped Evie's hand with his own. Exactly, he thought, as he bowed his head, tears leaking out of his eyes.

Nicholas opened his eyes, then closed them again, turning over just as he heard a scream. He bolted up, throwing his bedroom door open. He hurried down the hall to Steve's room to find his son wasn't there. He heard another scream and followed the sound to the other side of the house. He found Steve on the floor, his back pressed against the arm of the couch. "Son?"

Steve only stared ahead, his eyes wide open, as he took heavy breaths.

Nicholas drew closer, noticing the sweat on Steve's head and the way his face was flushed. "Son? You're okay."

Steve didn't respond, his breathing only growing heavier.

Nicholas got on his knees next to Steve and reached for his arm, squeezing gently. "Look at me, Steve. You're safe."

Steve didn't speak or look at Nicholas, as his body grew more tense. He trembled beneath his dad's touch.

Nicholas leaned closer, trying to meet Steve's eyes, even as he could see how glassy and unfocused they appeared. God, help me, he prayed silently. I haven't seen him like this before. "Come on, Son. Snap out of it."

When Steve still didn't show a sign of responding to him, Nicholas settled himself against the couch, crossing his legs, as he kept a hand on his son's arm. He continued to watch him, noticing when his breathing grew lighter, and his body began to appear more relaxed.

Nicholas tried talking to Steve again. "It's okay." He saw his son's eyes begin to drift closed. "Let me help you lie down." He wrapped an arm around Steve's shoulders, helping him stand, then eased him onto the couch. He guided him to lie down, putting a pillow under his head.

Steve's eyes drifted all the way closed, his head sinking into the pillow.

Nicholas sat on the edge of the couch in front of Steve, looking at his son's face. "I don't want to leave you right now." He got up and pulled an extra blanket from the hall closet, curling up on the other end of the couch. He patted Steve's leg. "Just sleep, Son." Nicholas' eyes drifted up. "God, let him be able to rest. He needs a little peace."

Steve's eyes blinked open, as he stretched. He sat up and looked around, realizing he was on the couch. "How did I get here?" he mumbled.

Nicholas came from the hallway. "Hey, I was just about to wake you up."

Steve rubbed his face, yawning. "How did I end up here?"

"I hoped you could tell me that. Around one this morning, you were screaming. I found you in here."

"Huh? I don't remember that at all. I sure don't remember leaving my bed."

"I thought you were awake. You looked like it, but you didn't seem to know I was talking or that I was even there. Then, you just fell back asleep. Do you remember dreaming?"

"Yeah. But not much else. Just being scared." Steve sighed. "I guess I'm sleepwalking now too."

Nicholas patted Steve's shoulder. "It's all right. Whatever was going on, I think it might be better you don't remember. You looked terrified."

"I must have been to be screaming."

"Come on and have some breakfast. You've got plenty of time."

Steve looked down, shaking his head. "I'm not really hungry right now, Dad." He stood up, stretching some more. "I'm just going to go get dressed. Sorry about waking you up last night."

"Don't worry about that, Son. You know you don't have to apologize."

"How'd it go with Evie last night?" Soda asked, after he got into Steve's car.

Steve shifted into reverse, pulling away from the Curtis' house. "Okay, I guess. She listened."

Soda nodded. "Good. She cares about you, man."

Steve stared out the windshield, flipping on his signal before he turned left. He was silent for several seconds, driving in the direction of the DX. "Hey, Soda, can I tell you something?"

"You know you can."

"I don't know if me and Evie are going to make it. I thought we would even after..." Steve glanced at Soda, making brief eye contact, before letting his gaze drift back to the road. "But I don't know now."

"Just give it some time, buddy. What does she think?"

"I'm not sure. But I keep feeling like we're just going through the motions, trying to be together cause we think that's how it's supposed to be, you know?"

"Maybe you should tell her that."

"Maybe. It seems like there are some things I can't get past. I want to, but if I can't, it's not fair to her to keep doing this. She already waited for me once."

Steve felt the eyes of his classmates on him, as he picked up a piece of chalk. He looked at his homework paper that he held, diagrams and definitions staring back at him. He started to draw the genetic diagram: parents, phenotype, genotype, dominant allele, recessive allele.

Steve looked down at his paper again, feeling it begin to crumble in his hand. He pressed the chalk into the board, the punnett square and terms blurring together.

Mr. Grant stood near the board. "You know how to finish it, Steve?"

Steve looked at his teacher, then at his classmates, who were waiting for him. "I think I- I mean, I need-" He didn't finish speaking, only let the paper and chalk fall to the floor, as he fled from the classroom.

TwoBit shoved the hall pass into his pocket, sauntering away from the classroom. "It's almost the end of the day. Why does anyone care if I go take a piss?" He was about to open the bathroom door when Steve darted out of the classroom a couple of doors down. TwoBit stopped, his hand on the door handle. "Hey, man, what's up?"

Steve didn't reply, as he pushed open the door that led to the courtyard.

TwoBit cocked an eyebrow. "I wonder why he's in such a hurry."

Steve eyes bounced around the courtyard, breathing in the fresh air. The sun shone on him, as he sat on the bench farthest away from the school building. He pressed his back against it, digging his fingers into the metal.

Steve focused his eyes on the parking lot, seeing his own car and those of his classmates. His voice came out in a soft whisper. "You're just a memory. I'm not there. You're not real."

TwoBit peaked out the small window on the door leading to the courtyard. "What's he doing out there?" He went outside, starting to approach the bench where Steve sat. "Hey, man, what's going on?"

Steve lifted one foot onto the bench, laying his head against the material of his jeans. "Nothing, TwoBit."

TwoBit rested his elbows on the back of the bench, leaning forward. "You all right?"

Steve fought back tears borne more of embarrassment than the pain of memories. He felt TwoBit touch his shoulder, as he still stared out at the parking lot.

TwoBit spoke again. "You sick or something? Hell, if you were going to skip class, I thought you'd do it earlier."

Steve turned his head, resting it on his arm that was wrapped around his leg. "TwoBit, can you do something for me?"

"Sure, buddy. You don't sound too good."

"I can't go back in there. Would you go to Mr. Grant's classroom and grab my stuff for me. I just need to get out of here."

Steve found his DX shirt folded up on top of his bed, the cap next to it. He pulled his t-shirt over his head, still trying not to think about what had happened in class. He slipped on his DX shirt, doing up the buttons, then grabbed the cap on his way out of his bedroom. As he passed his dad's bedroom, he glanced inside.

Steve's mind raced, as he let his eyes drift to the bathroom, then back to his dad's room. His gaze swept over the several drawers in the dresser and the two in the nightstand, before moving toward the bed and closed closet.

Steve lifted a hand to his head, holding it there, as he took a deep breath. I need to walk away from here, he thought.

"You're here early," Soda said, when he saw Steve come inside the DX, just as he was wiping down the counter.

"Yeah," Steve said. "I won't punch in yet. It's just I left school early, and I didn't want to be at home."

"Oh." Soda paused, the rag he was using still in his hand. "Why'd you leave early?"

"I don't know if I can ever go back in there, Sodapop." Steve ran his hand through his hair, as he went behind the counter. He stared down at the station's tile floor, the blue and green pattern inching closer to him, as he eased himself onto it.

Soda kept an eye on the door. "What happened, buddy? Are you sure you should be here?"

"No, but being at home alone ain't a good idea either. I was in class, trying to write some stuff on the board. My mind, at first, it just went blank."

"Okay." Soda nodded. "What else?"

"And everybody was staring at me, or it felt like it anyway. Then, I don't know why, but a flashback started. So I just left class. I couldn't go back in there after that."

"Damn. I'm sorry, Stevie. You've still got a little time before you're supposed to be here. Why don't you go in the break room and try to relax?"

"It wasn't as bad as what happened here that day, but it was like everybody must be able to see what's in my head and feel-" Steve swallowed, rubbing his face. "My dad told me I was screaming last night too, and I don't even remember it."

"Do you need to call your dad? I know he always tells you to if you need him."

"No." Steve stood up, holding onto the edge of the counter. "I'm afraid if I go in the break room and just sit, I'm going to feel worse, and I don't want to call my dad."

"What do you need to do then?" Soda saw a couple of cars pull into the parking lot. "I'll stay a little longer if you need me to."

"I think I'm going to go in the garage and just try to find something to focus on. Okay?"

"Yeah. Please. Whatever will help."

Steve's pulled Laura's list from his wallet, though he felt he knew it by heart now. He let his eyes skim over the words on the page, then found the keys to the blue Chevy that set in the garage, seeing the paperwork on the desk. After quickly reading it over, Steve opened the driver's side door and sat down in the seat.

Steve opened his wallet and folded the list up, putting it back. He slipped the key into the car's ignition and turned it. He listened to the engine attempt to crank, a clicking sound coming from underneath the hood.

Steve turned the the car off, not letting go of the key. "I know how you feel car. I ain't doing much better."

"Who are you talking to out there?"

Steve looked up from the car, seeing Soda at the door that led to the inside of the station. "Nobody. Just myself, I guess."

"Okay. I just wanted to check on you, while things aren't too busy."

Steve lifted himself out of the driver's seat, holding onto the car's door. "Thanks, Soda. I'm okay." As okay as I'm going to get anyway, he thought.

"All right, man. Darry should be here soon to pick me up, but please come over if you want to talk about anything later."

"Something on your mind, little buddy?" Darry asked, as he pressed his foot onto the gas pedal in his truck.

"Nothing you don't already know, Dar," Soda said, as he sighed.

"Remember. Come to me if you start to feel overwhelmed."

"I know. I ain't going to start doing anything stupid. I can be smart, you know."

Darry came to a stop sign, pushing on the brake, as his tone grew sharp. "Hey! Why the hell would you say that?"

Soda turned his head to look at his brother. "What?"

"Really, Sodapop?" Darry waited for a car to pass through the intersection, before he started driving again. "I've never said you're not smart."

"It didn't mean anything, I swear. Sorry. It just kind of came out."

Darry relaxed, his features softening. "You sure it doesn't mean anything?"

"I just hate feeling like I don't know what to do, okay? Or that what I do doesn't even matter."

Samuel was just letting himself into the house when the phone rang. He picked up the receiver, undoing the pin on his restaurant name tag. "Hello?"

"Hi, Samuel, it's Grace."

"Oh, hi." Samuel greeted his pastor's wife and sister-in-law. "You looking for Vivian? I think she must be in the backyard or something. If you'll give me a minute-"

"No, I was looking for you. David wanted to see if you could preach this coming Sunday. I told him I'd call you because I wanted to talk to you anyway."

"Okay. I can put together a message. What did you want to talk about?"

"That man who's come to church these past few weeks. I knew I recognized him, and I just realized why."

A/N : What Steve experienced in that scene with Nicholas when he didn't respond is a night terror.