Chapter 21: Tempest
The next day it rained, and there would be no kite flying. Not that it seemed Harry would be interested in flying a kite. After Severus had questioned him, Harry had withdrawn into a shell that not even Hermione or Mr. Weasley could penetrate. The boy disappeared for nearly a whole day only to be found curled into a ball in the stable. Hermione, of course, blamed him for Harry's aloof behavior, and Severus couldn't tell her otherwise. In hindsight, he shouldn't have asked. Harry was still too fragile to be pushed. Severus wondered if Harry would ever tell him about what had happened at the Dursleys', and more and more he wondered if he even really wanted to know.
After a near silent breakfast with the Weasley family, Severus pled a headache and settled himself into Sir Arthur's empty study. He chose a volume from the dozens lining the walls but had very little inclination to actually read it. Instead, he thumbed the edges of the pages absently. His mind kept turning over the time that he had spent with Harry. The boy had been so happy of late. He had managed to overcome more than Severus had ever believed possible. Rather than the hard, angry person that he easily could have become, Harry was still full of wonder. Perhaps it was best to leave the past buried.
A gentle knock sounded at the door, and Severus was forced to set aside both the unread book and his thoughts. "My lord, I was wondering if I might have a word with you?" Lady Weasley asked softly.
"Yes, of course," he replied as he rose from his seat.
The matron gave him a nervous smile before sitting down across from him. "I must say that it is obvious that you care for Harry a great deal. It is really quite extraordinary to see just how far you are willing to go to protect him."
"I am simply doing what must be done," he said, uncomfortable with the praise.
"And what of the future? What does Harry want for himself?"
The questions gave Severus pause. In truth, he hadn't given Harry's future much thought. He had merely assumed that he would provide for Harry and that the boy would have no real need for anything. Strangely enough, he hadn't considered that Harry should want to live a life other than that—hadn't considered it possible. "I'm not certain," the lord murmured softly.
Lady Weasley nodded. "My husband and I have been talking." She wrung her hands nervously as she paused. "Well, we were wondering if you might consider leaving Harry with us?"
Severus' immediate reaction was to refuse, but he kept his silence instead for a moment. Surely Lady Weasley and her husband would provide a stable home for Harry. As much as the thought of leaving Harry behind hurt, he doubted he could ever give him the sort of familial support that the Weasleys could. He would be tempted as long as Harry was near and that was something that he could not deny any longer.
"I shall give it some thought," Severus answered slowly. "After all of this mess has been settled, I will let you know."
"Thank you for considering it," she told him as she stood. "Speaking of Harry, I wonder where the boy has gone."
Severus had a good idea that he had taken off to the stables again but said nothing. If Harry needed a bit of time away, who was he to intrude? The boy certainly had a great many things to think about these days. Perhaps a bit of privacy was just what he needed.
After an hour passed with no sight of the boy, Severus began to notice a tiny seed of anxiousness building in his stomach. Not since he had awoken had Harry been away from him for so long. Severus found himself wishing that he could find it in himself to walk right out to that stable and sit with the boy. Even when he could not fully communicate with Harry, he was always somehow soothed by Harry's presence. He wanted to be forgiven, he realized, but he was not well acquainted with either giving or receiving forgiveness.
When Harry did not return by late afternoon, Severus' resolve to give Harry space had waned, and he found himself standing in the stable. The smell of hay and horses was seemingly intensified by the rain outside, and Severus sneered as he fought the urge to cover his nose. Severus searched the stalls one at a time to no avail. It did cross his mind that Harry had gone elsewhere, but he didn't think that the boy would have evaded Lady Weasley inside the household. A creek above Severus sounded, and the lord then knew where Harry was. Cursing beneath his breath, Severus strode over to the ladder leading to the loft and steeled himself against the pain that ripped through him as he began his climb. Sure enough, Harry was reclining against the wall watching the rain through a small window. Harry must have felt the vibrations in the floor, and he looked to Severus as he hoisted himself up.
The boy bit his lip but did not sign. Without the words to draw him out, Severus joined him in his storm watching. Then Harry did something quite unexpected. He leaned his head against Severus shoulder. Unsure what to do, Severus did what seemed natural: he wrapped an arm around the boy's slender shoulders and savored the feel of Harry's body so near his own. It was an innocent touch, but one that ignited a burning deep down to his core. God, how he wanted Harry! Even now, his thoughts strayed to stripping the boy bare and taking him on the hay. Instead, he merely held Harry and watched the sky.
The rain soon became a full blown storm within a matter of minutes. Lightning danced its way across the sky weaving intricate patterns in its wake. The wind whipped through the trees on hill. For the first time in a very long time—perhaps in his entire life—Severus saw a beauty in it. He had never paid attention to the colors that swirled in the sky as the dark clouds moved above him, nor had he noticed the subtle weight to the air as the rain came down outside. It was such a simple pleasure that to Harry must seem like a decadent luxury. In a way, Severus was amazed that Harry would allow him to share it with him. Severus didn't know how long they remained there. An hour perhaps, but it seemed all to short when Harry pulled away.
Beautiful, Harry signed and then pointed to the sky.
Severus nodded. "Yes. Beautiful."
Harry closed his eyes and breathed in deeply. I'm happy.
Damning himself for not learning more from that doddering fool Dumbledore, Severus smiled. "Good."
You and me. I'm happy, Harry signed again, and Severus guessed that he meant that he was happy they were together. The satisfaction it brought Severus was almost too much.
Severus didn't think before he pulled Harry to him. His mind was utterly gone as his lips met Harry's and his tongue slid into Harry's willing mouth. The boy melted against him in a perfection so utterly sublime that Severus felt it all the way to his toes. Harry's lips tasted slightly of the apples he loved so very much, and the earthy sweetness of him was like a drug that had seeped into Severus' veins. He wanted more. His hands began to grasp at Harry's shoulders and Harry moaned. Harry's erection pressed in Severus' thigh was enough to make Severus ache to touch him there, but it was too soon. It was much too soon.
Easing Harry out of his arms, Severus could still feel the boy's pulse raging within himself. He let out a ragged breath before signing. "You and me. Slow down."
Harry looked crestfallen but nodded.
Severus was straightening his cravat when the boy suddenly became aware of himself. Harry's face blazed as he stared with a horrified gaze at the bulge in his trousers. Harry turned away quickly to hide it, and Severus began to curse himself. How the hell was he supposed to explain this? He stepped around Harry and did the only thing he knew to do. Severus pointed to his own hardened member. "It happens to us all," he said aloud, knowing full well that Harry couldn't understand his words.
Harry stared for a moment. Big, he signed and then pointed to Severus' crotch.
Severus couldn't stop his laughter. "Only to the eyes of the inexperienced."
When the storm—and certain body parts—had calmed, Severus and Harry walked back to the house. Before reaching the door, Severus stopped Harry. He fumbled for the words to ask for Harry's discretion. The boy watched as the lord rambled in sign incoherently for a moment before letting out a little laugh. He pointed to himself and then brought a finger to his lips. Though he let out more of a sigh than a "shh," Severus understood his full meaning.
Lady Weasley was not at all pleased with the two dripping men in her household. Severus was almost certain that if not for his rank and unfamiliarity, he would have gotten an earful from the matron. In this instance, he thought, Harry could be glad for his deafness, for Lady Weasley's shrill voice could be heard in Severus' room down the hall as she ranted at him for giving them all such a scare. Still, the worry was clear in her voice even at a distance, and it made him wonder all the more if leaving Harry was not such a bad idea. After all, how selfish could he really be?
That evening, Severus was asked into the study by Mr. Weasley. The teacher was grim faced as he explained, "Harry wants to answer your question from yesterday. He wants me to interpret for him. Keep in mind that Harry still doesn't have a complete grasp on sign, and I will try my best to make sure your both understood."
"Tell him he doesn't have to do this just yet," Severus told Mr. Weasley.
"I'm ready," Mr. Weasley interpreted. Severus eyed the young man sitting across from him. Harry looked resolute, and that was enough to erase Severus' doubts about having this conversation.
"From here on out, address Harry not me. I am merely acting as his voice," Mr. Weasley said before signing to Harry.
Harry began to sign. "I don't like to remember my life before now. It hurts. When I could hear, things still weren't good. My aunt and uncle didn't like me. They said mean things. My uncle would beat me when I was bad. He said I was always bad. I'm glad I don't remember their voices. I wanted to run away, but then I got sick."
Severus took his time to digest what he was being told. It made him want to kill Dursley with his bare hands. "How old were you when you got sick?"
"Nine. I woke up one day and my head hurt. Everything was hot. It hurt so much, but no one did anything. I thought I was going to die. When I woke up, I couldn't hear. I tried to talk but my words didn't come out right. Every time I tried to talk, my aunt would slap me. I stopped trying after a while."
Harry shifted in his seat and took a deep breath. His cheeks were dry, but his eyes were glassy and bright with unshed tears. More than anything, Severus wanted to tell him to stop, to tell him they would do this another day, but then Harry continued on.
"They made me sleep in the cupboard under the stairs. It was small and dark. My uncle locked me in at night. If they had visitors they would put me in the basement or the stable. I liked the stable better. One day, I tried to run away. I wanted to smell the air. See the sky. I got caught. They beat me. This time I wanted to die. I prayed that I would die. Then you came. You made me safe."
Severus was still and silent. He did not know exactly what to say. Words or no words, he was beginning to think it didn't matter. "Harry, I will always protect you," he swore, staring into Harry's eyes. "Always."
Harry nodded and smiled.
"I know," Mr. Weasley said, giving voice to Harry's sign. Though Severus couldn't say why, until that moment, Mr. Weasley's voice hadn't sounded like his own. It was somewhat jarring to realize once more that Harry was actually speaking through someone else.
Regaining his composure, Severus looked to Mr. Weasley. "Thank you for your assistance," he said.
"It was nothing at all," Mr. Weasley replied casually. "Soon, you two won't even need me."
The men parted ways soon after. Harry looked a bit drained from it all, and Severus was starting to feel the strain of the day on his body.
In the morning, Severus asked that his carriage be readied. Lady Weasley had the cook pack a bit of food for the travel even though it was less than half a day's journey. She did not ask for Severus' answer, for she knew instinctively that he would not give up Harry. Goodbyes were said just after breakfast, and the carriage departed with Mr. Weasley, Miss Granger, Harry, Daniel and Severus all crammed inside. Severus could only wonder what awaited them in Spinners's End.