I want to thank you all so much for your great feedback. You are the best bunch of feedbackers ever!

Carla Fox: Believe me, Leila is plenty pissed off. And it will only get worse

Velimira: We are two of the same. Damn those Conspiritorial Fairy Tales. thrusts fist into air

WILSON'S GOOD ADVICE

House barged into Wilson's office and sat down on the small sofa used to comfort patients as Wilson dropped the dreaded bomb on them. Wilson looked up from his computer, made a mental note of House's arrival and went back to work.

House sighed heavily and started flipping through one of the magazines Wilson had laid out on the coffee table.

Wilson finished typing his email, then took a sip of his coffee.

"It was great. Thanks for asking," House finally said huffily.

"Oh," Wilson looked up with over exaggerated surprise on his face. "When did you get back?"

"Last night. Paris Hilton wants to have a baby," House informed his friend, reading one of the small articles in the front of the magazine.

"Poor kid." Wilson said, coming over to sit across from House.

"Rich kid." House corrected, tossing the magazine back onto the coffee table haphazardly and watching as Wilson hurriedly straightened it. Once it was straightened, House propped his feet on top of the pile, messing it up again.

"House! I just straightened that."

"Yeah, thanks."

"So? Tell me everything." Wilson, ever the stereotypical yenta, leaned in and waited for the gossip.

"We're getting married," House grumbled unceremoniously.

"What?" Wilson stopped breathing from the shock, starting again only after he felt his head start spinning a bit. "Are you serious? You proposed?"

"Under great duress, I might add. And believe me, it was some GREAT duress if you know what I mean." House winked, remembering the activities surrounding his proposal.

"You're getting married." Wilson leaned back in his chair, stunned. He never thought it would happen. Stacy had spent years trying to get House to propose. When she failed, Wilson figured it was a lost cause.

"Yeah, I'd ask you for advice, but with your record..."

"Yeah, well..."

"Yeah well what?" House looked at his friend with great interest.

"Julie and I are talking again," Wilson said with a glimmer of hope in his voice.

"Dump her. She's much too good for you."

Wilson tried to shake that thought into making sense. It didn't work. "I think she's reconsidering the divorce."

"That's great, but we were talking about me." House was bored with Wilson's story already. "How the hell am I going to get out of this?"

Wilson frowned. "Get out of it?"

"Yeah. I'm not getting married. It's not...cool."

"Right, wouldn't want to tarnish that swinging bachelor image you've got going."

"But I don't want to leave her," House admitted reluctantly.

"Obviously," Wilson said.

"So, how do I get out of it?"

"You don't." Wilson snickered.

"Her parents hate me."

"All parents hate you House."

"Her mother thinks I'm the spawn of Satan."

"Silly woman. You ARE Satan."

"You're not helping."

"I have a radical idea." Wilson's face lit up. "Try to be NICE to them."

House looked at his friend with utter disgust. "It's like you don't know me at all."

"Don't they live in Michigan or somewhere out there?"

"Chicago."

"So it's not like you have to see them often."

"Never would be too often."

"Do it for Cuddy."

"What's she done for me?"

"Made you a tolerable human being?"

"Humph."

"For once in your life House, try to make peace. Who knows, you might like it."

"I won't."

"Try."

"No."

"I dare you."

House laughed nervously. "You really think that's going to work?"

"It couldn't hurt to try. How about a bribe? You like bribes."

"Yes, I do. But what could you possibly have to offer?"

"I'll be your best man."

"Puh. But what could you possibly have to offer?"

"What would work?"

House was about to say 'nothing' but held his tongue. No need to be hasty. Wilson watched carefully as House thought about it. "You'll be my bitch, for one year."

"I'm already your bitch."

"You don't get how this works, do you?" House sighed. "For one year I reserve the right to make you do anything I want. Any thing, any time."

"Nothing illegal."

"Any thing, any time," House reiterated.

"Any time, any thing that is not illegal."

"For one year."

"For one month."

"For six months." House could have some fun with that.

"You have to make peace with Cuddy's parents, and not mess up your wedding, and I will do what you want for three months."

"Even if it's illegal?" House saw Wilson cracking.

"I won't kill anyone."

"That sounds fair." House nodded. Killing was too easy anyway.

"You've got yourself a deal." Wilson grinned. House wasn't going to be able to do it anyway, so he had nothing to lose, and at least Cuddy should get SOME peace, even if it ends up being short lived.

A slow smile spread across House's face. "You are sooooo going to regret this."