Chapter 20

Disclaimer: I do not own Rurouni Kenshin, but Midori was my idea.

She is hurt.

His panther is hurt because of that fucking idiot Sagara.

Makoto Shishio snarls to himself as he paces. He has sent everyone away, even Yumi. The woman had been hanging all over him as she always seems to do, and while it didn't normally bother him, when he thinks of anyone other than his wounded panther touching him he wants to kill something. No one should ever touch him again except his panther, and she isn't here.

He wants her back. He wants her in his lap right now. He wants her skin against his lips and her blood thrumming against his fingertips. He wants Anji to take care of the wound in her abdomen that she sustained last night because of that – fucking – idiot – Sanosuke Sagara. Shishio growls savagely at the memory of that spiky-haired bastard wrapping an arm around Shishio's panther. He will die for that if for no other reason than he dared to touch something that didn't belong to him.

And his panther…

He had been shocked when she had practically flown between him and Soujiro to save Sagara's life. She had actually protected the idiot. Why? Does she actually give a shit about the stupid punk?

NO. That's not true. His panther is not allowed to care about anyone but him, damn it.

That isn't really important anyway. What is important is that his panther is wounded and he wants her here so that he can fix her.

Shishio sighs, his rage spent, and flops down onto the couch to recline and think. His thoughts go immediately back to his panther, as they always seem to do these days. He thinks about the way her mouth felt pressed against his, the way she had tasted against his exploring tongue. He thinks about the little noises she made in the back of her throat as he kissed her. He thinks about the way her small delicate hand had felt pressed over his heart.

He closes his eyes and leans his head back against the couch as his thoughts take him back to the Bakumatsu, back to that first day when he met his panther. He had followed her as she went on assignment, captivated by her beauty and already making plans to lure the pretty little kitty into his bed. Captivation had become full blown arousal as he had watched her kill her target. She had played with the man, just like a panther might play with her food before eating it. Shishio had wondered if she would lick the blood from her blade before the rain could wash it away, and had been slightly disappointed when she didn't. Surely she was the type to relish the sweet taste of blood?

He doesn't even bother to suppress the moan that escapes when he remembers how it felt the first time he touched her; how her body had fit so perfectly against his own when he had tossed her up against the wall she had just recently pinned a body to. He lets his body remember the almost painful jolts of pleasure and desire that such a touch had awoken in him. The press of her katana over his jugular had done nothing to deter his newly-budding passion.

Shishio's lips form a hellish snarl when he remembers that night that he came in from his latest kill and had overheard a bunch of idiots talking about her. He had stood outside the door of the room they were drinking in and listened as they talked about his panther being abducted by another faction of the Ishin Shishi during her first year with them. He had listened as they brushed over a few types of torture she was reportedly subjected to, like rape and some sort of whip with many heads attached to it. He had listened as they proceeded to go into great detail about exactly what his panther did to her captors when she was finally able to free herself. His desire for her had grown in leaps and bounds for every detail spoken of her vengeance.

When he had grown tired of their talking, Shishio had then slid aside the door he had been listening through and taken great pleasure in butchering all six or seven of the fools who dared to suggest that his panther deserved to be tortured like that in the first place. Hell, even he would never do something like that to an ally; if he wanted them dead, he would kill them, but he wouldn't torture a woman like that. That was fucked up even by Shishio's standards. The thought that his panther had gone through something like that and not died or gone insane had impressed him to no end.

If Shishio's memory serves him right, it had been nearly a full year later when he had found his panther thrashing around in the dining area one night, breath smelling of sake and screaming for all she was worth. His body has no trouble remembering what it felt like to pin her squirming, screeching form in his lap. He twitches at the remembered feeling of then being able to cradle her warm body against his as he tried to coax her to talk to him about her nightmares, and the anger he had felt when she had refused. He still has the scar on his shoulder where she bit the shit out of him. He still isn't sure why it didn't get burned away with his skin when he was set on fire. Maybe it's fate; maybe it was the gods' idea of a joke; it doesn't really matter. It actually gives him a perverse sort of pleasure to know that he will always bear her mark.

Which reminds him: one of these days he'll have to mark her in return. Fair's fair, after all.

Absently, he wonders if she ever realized that he would sleep outside her room nearly every night after that; just so he could hear her screams and tell himself that she was sharing them with him.

His fingers clench deeply into the couch's cushions as he remembers when that fucker from the higher-ups had come to him and given him an order to kill his panther. Shishio had come so fucking close to killing that pompous windbag right there in the hallways of their headquarters. Instead he had sneered at the man and told him to go to Hell. Zetsumei Kurohyou is too much fun, he had jeered. Why the hell would he have wanted to kill someone so fun?

Shishio jerks up to a sitting position from where he had been reclining on the couch, his eyes flying open, and snarls as he recalls with perfect clarity the blood-boiling rage that had nearly driven him completely insane when he found her on that damned battlefield two days later with a hole driven right through her body, just inches to the left of her heart. He remembers having heard that the Battousai himself had been forced to kill his old partner, having first been fed some bullshit story about how she sold herself and a bunch of information to the Shogunates for one reason or another. He had wanted to find that red-haired little fairy-boy and tear his head off barehanded for being stupid enough to believe that load of shit. Really, how fucking gullible could a person be?

His growls shake the whole couch as he relives those five days when his panther was out of her mind with fever. Every scream had infuriated him to no end, and he had been forced to physically restrain himself when she had cried out for the Battousai in her delirium. She had actually cried out for the fucker who had put his damned blade nearly through her heart.

And not once – not one fucking time – had his panther called out for him.

Shishio lies back down on the couch and closes his eyes again for the next memory. A positively evil smirk pulls at his lips as he remembers with absolutely clarity how it had felt to finally – finally – have his beautiful panther nude and writhing underneath him in that filthy hut. He remembers marveling at the taste of exotic oranges all over her body – from her neck to her breasts to her flat little stomach to her thighs. He can easily name from memory every spot on that gorgeous body that will produce a moan or a sigh from her sweet mouth.

Yumi might be great for relieving tension; but no woman will ever have the effect on him that his little panther had. He trembles just remembering the ecstasy.

As for the memory of how it had felt to bury himself inside of his panther after wanting her for so fucking long…well. Shishio decides to leave that for another time, preferably when his panther is here to deal with the physical repercussions such a memory is sure to cause for him.

He didn't see her again after that one night of bliss for over a year, but when he opened his eyes that first time after his body had been set on fire only to find her giving his naked body a sponge bath, he thought the gods had pulled some kind of enormous cosmic screw-up and sent her soul to Hell with his. Either that or they had lost their fucking minds and sent him to Heaven.

Something in him had roared with pleasure when she told him that she had been caring for his ruined body for six months. Six entire months. Half a year of taking care of him all alone. She didn't leave him to die or kill him out of annoyance or somehow deliver him to those fuckers who tried to kill him in the first place. No, she hadn't done any of that. Instead she had chosen of her own free will to nurse him back to health.

That was when Shishio had decided that he loved Zetsumei Kurohyou. He didn't give a shit that he didn't even know her name or anything about her. He was in love with her.

And then when he was well enough to get by on his own again, the only woman in the entire world that he would ever love had told him to leave. She had packed up her own belongings and set the house she had been living in on fire before walking away from him without so much as a backwards glance.

Shishio is sure now that she would have stayed with him if she could have; but because the government was doubtlessly going to start hunting him again when they figured out that he wasn't dead, it would have been too dangerous for his panther to remain with him. That had been the only explanation that he had been able to think of at the time, as well, and the only reason he hadn't tried to follow her.

He is going to make her a queen. He is going to give her anything and everything she could ever possibly want. She is going to spend the rest of her life by his side, where she belongs, and every night from here to eternity in his bed. She will never sleep alone on some dirty patch of ground again.

Shishio is going to make his precious Midori a goddess in his new Japan, and he is going to make her love him if it's the last thing he ever does.

She will love him, Makoto Shishio, and no one else.

"Kaoru-dono, may I speak with you please?" Midori whispered, reaching out to lightly grasp Kaoru's sleeve as the girl passed Midori's shadowy hiding spot. The girl gave a start, not having been aware of Midori's presence until the assassin had spoken.

"Midori-san?" Kaoru whispered back. It was very late, after midnight; the rest of the inn's inhabitants were probably asleep. Midori had woken this afternoon after her second trip into the land of dreams, but had been unsuccessful in her attempts to sleep again so far. She had decided to give it up for a lost cause and had moved to a shadowy patch of the veranda around the inn's garden, out of the light of the stars and out of sight. When she had spied Kaoru slipping quietly out of her room and heading in her general direction, she had decided that now would be a good time to have a very important conversation with the young kenjutsu teacher.

"Please, it is important that you hear this," Midori whispered, gently tugging the girl into the shadows with her. She would rather Kaoru not be able to see her face as she spoke – hopefully she could refrain from crying in front of the girl, but she wasn't going to be taking any chances.

"What is it, Midori-san? Is it your abdomen? Do you need me to help you apply more bandages?" The girl sounded genuinely worried for Midori's health. Midori was still getting used to that, considering the treatment she had become accustomed to during her stay at the Kamiya dojo.

"No, Kaoru-dono. I do not require your assistance. I require that you listen to me, and not interrupt, and after I am finished talking I will require your word that you will never reveal to Himura or anyone else what I ask of you. Do you understand what I am saying?"

"Of course, Midori-san," Kaoru immediately replied, honesty ringing true in her young voice.

Alright, she had to ask.

"Kaoru-dono, why are you being so friendly to me?" she blurted out without preamble. That question had been eating at her all damn day; if she was going to die tomorrow, she decided she wanted to die with no secrets kept from her.

"I…Midori-san, I need to apologize," Kaoru mumbled, sounding very embarrassed. "I treated you horribly when you were a guest at my dojo. I was an awful hostess, and I can't imagine what you must think of me.

"It's just that – well – I was jealous of you, Midori-san. Kenshin acts so differently around you; it's like you bring out a completely different person in him that none of the rest of us can even touch. I mean, I've been trying for months to get him to stop adding dono onto the end of my name with no luck, and all you had to do was tell him not to call you that once.

"And, also…I really care a lot about Kenshin, Midori-san. I care about him more than I can put into words without making a fool of myself. And it seems like Kenshin does everything in Heaven and on Earth to keep me at arm's length. When you came along…and he always seemed to be so close to you, and he talked so easily to you…it was just hard for me to accept that, Midori-san. It was really hard. So I just…took out my frustration on you.

"But I realized – that night, when you threw yourself in front of Kenshin and let Saito stab you – that you would actually die for him. When you were unconscious, and developed that fever, the only times you didn't thrash around or scream from your nightmares were the times when Kenshin was touching some part of you; even if he just held your hand, you slept as peacefully as a small child. When he tried to move away from you, you would call him ninjin and cry out for him until he touched you again. And Kenshin…he was so worried about you, Midori-san. I don't think he left that room but once or twice the whole time you were unconscious.

"I realized, during those two weeks when everyone was so afraid that you might die, that you weren't a horrible woman like I had convinced myself you were. I realized that I was the one that was horrible, treating you like a servant and saying those awful things about your master because I was so jealous of you. I…I would understand if you couldn't bring yourself to forgive me, Midori-san, but I still want to apologize for my terrible behavior. I promise not to act in such a dreadful fashion towards you again in the future."

Midori said nothing for a moment after Kaoru stopped speaking, using the time to mentally process everything the younger girl has just told her. She felt like a complete idiot for not having figured it out for herself. Of course Kaoru was jealous; of course she had felt slighted by the closeness Midori shared with Himura. It only made sense for Kaoru to lash out against the person causing that jealousy – obviously she wouldn't lash out at Himura. Her annoying and rude behavior towards Midori had simply been the natural reaction of a girl trying to deal with the object of her affections moving further and further away from her.

It seemed jealousy really did make people do stupid things, like Kaoru treating her like shit or Himura accusing her of being a spy for Shishio. Kaoru, of course, had the added defense that she was a teenage girl with a crush. Himura didn't have any excuse except for stupidity.

This was actually just perfect for what she wanted to force the Kamiya to agree to do for her. The girl probably wouldn't like it, but if she really did care about Himura as much as she was saying she did, Midori was confident that she would agree in the end.

"Kaoru-dono, tomorrow I will go with Himura, Sanosuke, and Saito to face Shishio and his men at Mount Hiei."

She heard a noise come from Kaoru, and quickly spoke over what the girl was about to say.

"Yes, I know what Himura said," she confirmed, scowling to herself. She had woken up this afternoon to voices out here on the veranda and come to join the others. She had been surprised to see Okina-san leaning on a walking stick, covered in bandages. He had been standing out in the garden opposite Himura, who had been facing away from Midori. Everyone else had been clustered around a small girl in ninja garb that Midori hadn't recognized, who appeared to be crying silently as the two men talked.

"I promise that I will bring Aoshi back here, where he belongs," Himura had said. "In return, Okina-san, I would like to ask that you protect Midori tomorrow while Sano and I are gone. Due to her wound, I think it would be best if Midori stayed here. I don't want anything to happen to her."

"Yes, of course Himura-san," Okina-san had replied. "We will protect Midori-san with our lives."

"Like Hell you will!!" Midori had snarled, scaring the shit out of all assembled. Kaoru and both of the older women that lived at the Aoi-Ya had screamed; Sanosuke had toppled from the veranda to the ground in shock; the unfamiliar girl had leapt up and brandished a set of kunai she seemed to have pulled from thin air while Yahiko brandished his bokken; Okina-san had given a leap of surprise that had nearly put the old man in the garden's little pond; and Himura had whipped around to face her, wearing the kind of expression a child would wear after being caught with his hand in the cookie jar by a particularly strict parent after multiple warnings.

Midori had not been affected or amused by the look.

"How dare you think you can dictate what I will or will not do?" she had raged at him. "I am not a child, Himura! I do not need your permission to go to Mount Hiei and I will be going whether you like it or not! Gods, you are such a baka!"

And she had stormed off without another word, fuming at the indignity of it all. Imagine, Himura trying to set up a fucking koromi for her so he could leave her behind! Baka!

Midori reigned in her anger now and focused on her conversation with Kaoru. She would kick Himura's ass later, if she survived all the fights tomorrow. Right now, she needed to insure that someone would be there for him if she did not survive.

She needed to insure that Kaoru would be there for him.

"Kaoru-dono, I also care greatly for Himura. I…love him; I have loved him for a very long time. But, there is a very good chance that I will not return from Mount Hiei tomorrow."

"Oh, no, Midori-san, please don't say that –"

"Be silent," Midori cut in firmly. "I have not finished speaking."

She waited a moment to make sure that Kaoru would say nothing further before continuing.

"Kaoru-dono, if Himura's life is put in danger tomorrow, there no force in the universe that will keep me from sacrificing my life so that he may live. I am aware that such an action would cause Himura pain. I know that it might even break his heart. But as long as there is breath in my body, Kaoru-dono, the gods themselves will not be able to kill Kenshin Himura without going through me first.

"If I die tomorrow, then I want your word that you will be here for Himura. You tell me that you care deeply for him. I want you to prove that those were not just empty words. If Himura returns here tomorrow shattered because of my death, I want your word that you will spend as long as necessary picking up the pieces and putting him back together. You are to take him back to Tokyo and take care of him for as long as you are able. Do you understand what I am telling you?"

There was no reply. Midori reached a hand out into the darkness and caught one of Kaoru's hands, giving it a firm squeeze.

"I require an answer from you, Kaoru Kamiya. Do you understand what I have just asked of you?" she repeated, not letting go of Kaoru's hand.

"Y…yes, Midori-san," was the faint reply.

"Do you swear to me that you will take care of Himura for as long as you can if something happens to me tomorrow?"

"I do." Kaoru's voice was shaking horribly, as was the hand that Midori still held.

"And you will not ever mention this conversation to anyone?"

"I won't." A drop of liquid plopped on the hand holding Kaoru's, and Midori gently drew the quivering girl forward and wrapped her in a light hug. Kaoru's shoulders trembled as she cried quietly onto Midori's shoulder, her hands fisted gently into the material of Midori's gi.

When Kaoru's tears were spent, Midori dropped her arms from around the girl and stepped away.

"Arigato, Kaoru-dono. I forgive you for the way you treated me and the things you said about my Myoushu. Now go to bed."

Without another word and without waiting for Kaoru to pull herself together enough to say anything, Midori turned on her heel and walked away.

Sanosuke had told her when she regained consciousness that Saito had sent an officer around to inform them that he thought it best if they made for Mount Hiei in the morning. So it was that Midori found herself standing in front of the Aoi-Ya early the next morning watching Saito make his way down the street towards them, the familiar hatred for the police officer muted by the knowledge that today may very well be the last she spent on this earth.

She stood flanked by Himura on one side and Sanosuke on the other, with Kaoru and Yahiko behind the three with all of the members of the Oniwabanshu. Everyone had come out to wish them well.

Saito came to a stop some ways away from them, as though not wanting to associate himself with the group anymore that was absolutely necessary.

"I trust you are done preparing," he drawled, yellow eyes moving from Himura's face to Midori's. "And recovering."

Midori's only answer was a glare. Saito smirked faintly before turning away from them.

"Let's go."

As one, Himura, Midori, and Sanosuke stepped forward and began following the wolf back down the street. They had only gone a few steps when a voice from behind them had called out, "Kenshin! Midori-san!"

The three companions stopped to look back. Kaoru had stepped forward, a tentative smile on her young face and hope in her eyes.

"When we go back to Tokyo," she called to them, "let's all go back home together."

Midori suppressed a flinch at the word 'home'. Kaoru considered her dojo Midori's home?

It was official, then. The world really was coming to an end.

Beside her, Himura was currently returned Kaoru's gentle smile.

"Alright, Kaoru-dono; we will," he agreed without hesitation.

Midori said nothing. She caught Kaoru's eye and gave the girl a meaningful look; she waited until the girl nodded before turning away with Himura and Sanosuke to continue following Saito. She was not going to make any promises. What she had told Kaoru the night before was the truth: if necessary, Midori would die to insure that Himura lived. He might be hurt, he might be broken hearted, but as long as he was alive Midori would die satisfied.

Midori would never make a promise that she might not be able to keep.

The trip up the mountain was done in near silence. Midori spent the majority of the journey trying to hide how much pain she was in from Himura and Sanosuke; she seriously doubted that Saito would give a shit if he noticed. That steel plate that had impaled her appeared to have broken the lowest of her ribs on the right side; this made climbing a fucking mountain even harder that it would normally be. Midori had no doubt that if Himura or Sanosuke noticed that it was bothering her, they would try to force her to go back to the Aoi-Ya, and she didn't want to argue with them. She would win the argument, of course, but if she could avoid having one altogether she would.

She was also determined not to let either of her friends know that the scar she carried from Himura's blade was still bleeding small amounts every few hours. Himura would doubtlessly have a complete freak out session, and Midori really didn't want to have to deal with that.

"Get over here, youma. I want to talk to you."

Midori bite her tongue to keep from saying that she could care less what Saito wanted and sped up enough to walk at his side through the forest.

"What?" she snapped, wincing as a misstep jarred her broken rib. Both it and the stitched-up hole in her abdomen were tightly wrapped by the bandages she always wore to cover her torso, but damn if the stupid thing didn't still hurt.

Saito regarded her out of the corner of his narrow yellow eye. "Would you like to explain to me why you smell like blood?"

Midori's stomach sank; she glanced over her shoulder to make sure Himura and Sanosuke weren't close enough to hear their conversation.

"Why do people usually smell like blood, wolf?" she muttered, turning her eyes back to Saito. "Obviously it's because I am bleeding. I thought you were rumored to be intelligent."

"Watch your tongue, youma," Saito replied in a level tone, digging around in his pockets for his cigarettes and his matches. "Were you too stupid to get that wound on your abdomen treated yesterday?"

"Of course I had it treated!" Midori snapped at him, giving heavy consideration to snatching that lit cigarette out of his mouth and poking the burning end into his eye. "That's not even where I am bleeding. It isn't your concern, Saito, so why don't you keep that overly sensitive nose out of my business, alright?"

"Oh, I see. It must just be that time of the month for you, youma. Am I correct?"

Midori saw red.

When her vision cleared, both Himura and Sanosuke had fistfuls of her gi and were dragging her away from the smirking figure of Saito while she shouted at them to let her go. She was going to kill that son-of-a-bitch. She was going to kill him if it was the last thing she did!!

"I suppose that means I was right," Saito called after them as Himura and Sanosuke struggled to drag her up the trail they had been following. "Women are always so touchy about that particular issue."

"Baka yaro!" Midori howled back at him in a fury, fighting to get loose so that she could beat the living daylights out of the insufferable man. "I'm bleeding in my chest area, you ketsunoana! How dare you ask me that?!"

Saito shot her an evil grin right before she realized she had just yelled out that she was bleeding. Predictably, both Sanosuke and Himura began bombarding her with questions, probing her delicately, and discussing between themselves whether they should turn around long enough to drop Midori off at the police station or the Aoi-Ya. Midori quickly put an end to such speculation.

"Need I remind you both that it isn't up to you whether I go somewhere or not?" she barked, tearing herself free at last from their grip and stomping up the path. "I'm going with you. It's not like I'm going to bleed to death, and the injury doesn't concern any of you. So stop discussing my future like a couple of kamis and come on."

She clenched her hands into fists and continued to stomp up the path, a cowed-looking Himura and Sanosuke on either side of her again. Saito trailed lazily behind them, no doubt smirking for all he had accomplished in so short a time this morning.

Midori was going to take a very, very great amount of pleasure from killing that bastard wolf one of these days.

Her foul mood soured further upon finally reaching the doorway to Shishio's domain only to be greeted by a certain promiscuous female. Yumi Komagata was leaning primly against the closed doors, a secretive smile on her green-tinted lips.

"Welcome gentlemen," she murmured coyly as they drew within easy hearing range. "We've been waiting for you."

She completely ignored Midori, which did absolutely nothing to improve Midori's temper.

"It would take you a lifetime to travel through the maze within this fortress. My name is Yumi Komagata and I will be acting as your humble guide."

Apparently the fact that Midori had already made her way through the labyrinthine compound from the outside in and then back was going to be disregarded. Which meant she was stuck with this annoying woman's company. This day just continued to get better and better for Midori.

From beside her, Sanosuke muttered to the other men, "Using women. It's a common trap, so be careful."

In spite of her black mood, Midori felt a smile kick up the corners of her mouth. Clearly Sanosuke knew nothing about Shishio, the silly man.

"You're about the only one here who's gullible enough to fall for a trick like that," Saito informed him rudely, casually walking forwards and ignoring Sanosuke's indignant 'hey!'

"Shishio would never set such an obvious trap," Himura added as he also walked forward, further adding to Sanosuke's annoyance. Midori smiled again and followed Himura.

They may have been descending into the bowels of Hell to fight the devil himself, but at least she still had Sanosuke to make her smile.

She had the feeling that she wouldn't be doing that much very soon.

A/N: Please review.