Disclaimer: Don't own Bones.

A/n: Happy Birthday to the lovely va32h! I promised her smut and I'm a little late on that, but I wanted to post on her actual birthday! Hope it's what you had in mind! :)

For All Intents and Purposes

Brennan leaned against the metal railing and watched Booth and Sweets strap on their gear at the bottom of the rock climbing wall. Booth had objected yet again when Sweets suggested adding a more social component to their session.

"Last time you made us go to a ceramics class," Booth had groaned.

"And you enjoyed it, didn't you?"

"I'm not doing that again, Sweets."

"Fine. How about this?" Sweets had compromised. "You can pick this time."

Brennan had pouted a little when Booth had gleefully picked rock climbing. But she wasn't too invested in the activity since she was not really in the mood to do anything other than sit and eat.

Watching Booth climb the wall was very pleasant. His eyes were narrowed in concentration and she noticed his tongue would press unconsciously against his bottom lip when he was reaching for a higher perch. And to her visual delight, his black tee did nothing but accentuate the pleasing way his muscles bunched and clenched, a testament to his exertion.

When Booth got to the top of the wall, he stepped easily unto the ledge that led to the second floor where Brennan was waiting.

"Hey, Bones," he gave her a big grin and leaned into her.

Brennan leaned back with a dubious expression. "You're all sweaty."

He laughed and tugged at the belt of her dress. "I just want a kiss," he charmed.

"You're secreting adrenaline and your testosterone levels have likely spiked due to the exercise," she explained, "which would lead to an increase in libido."

"Okay, you can lecture me after you kiss me."

She chuckled and met his lips. He palmed the back of her head and swept his tongue inside her mouth. When she sucked the tip, Booth moaned loud enough that she broke the kiss. "We're in pu—" Brennan's voice trailed off and she looked around. "Uh, Booth … where's Sweets?"

He blinked, his brown eyes a little glassy. "What?"

"Dr. Sweets, where is he?" Brennan took a few steps to look over the rail. "Ah, Booth?"

He walked forward and joined her. He looked over to see Sweets halfway up the climbing wall. Hands braced on the rail, he leaned forward and called down. "Everything okay there, Sweets?"

"Um ... yeah." It was a high squeak that barely reached their ears.

Brennan gave a concerned look. "Booth, I think he suffers from acrophobia."

"You gotta be kidding me." Booth looked down guiltily to where a pale Sweets appeared to be paralyzed. "Why did he agree to this, then?"

"Dr. Sweets, it's fine, you're strapped to a harness," Brennan called down encouragingly. "You're not very high, anyway. Falling would cause a few broken bones, at most."

"Uh, I don't think that's helping, babe."

She sent Booth a mild glare and he just grinned innocently. "There's a café up here, Dr. Sweets," Brennan enticed. "I will buy you a cinnamon bun. All you have to do is make it up here."

"C'mon, Sweets, you can do it," Booth added.

Sweets whimpered and Brennan turned an anxious gaze to her partner. "I think you need to go get him."

Strapping his harness back on, Booth stepped over the ledge that lead back to the top of the climbing wall. Reaching Sweets was the easy part, the hard part was convincing him to move.

"I had no idea I was afraid of heights," Sweets muttered, holding on as if his life depended on it.

"We're really not all that hi—I mean, look, it'll be fine, Sweets."

"I really don't think it will," he disagreed.

"Look, we're all afraid of something, right?" Booth said, hoping to channel his inner shrink. "But at one point or another, we have to confront our fears."

Sweets sent him a skeptical sideways glance. "Where are you getting that from?"

"From you."

"Well, obviously, I don't know what I'm talking about."

"It's not your fault, Dr. Sweets," Brennan contributed from above. "Psychology is simply too ill-defined a field to be of much use to anybody."

"Bones!"

"Thanks, Dr. Brennan," Sweets muttered.

"Booth, he will only be able to hang on for so long," Brennan advised. "Eventually, his fingers and legs will cramp up and—"

"Oh my god," Sweets moaned piteously. "I am getting cramps!"

"No, you're not." Booth raised his gaze up to where Brennan was practically hanging over the side of the rail. "Bones, for the love of God, please step away from the rail."

"What? I'm perfectly safe."

"Sweets, you really need to move before Bones comes down here and gets you herself," Booth warned. "Okay, how do you want to do this? Up or down?"

Sweets peeked down, nearly went dizzy. "Up," he squeaked. "Definitely up."

"Good choice." Booth reached over, tugged on the harness. "You're strapped on nice and tight, Sweets. You can do this, okay? We're gonna do this together."

Snails moved faster than Sweets climbing up that wall, but Booth offered staunch support and Brennan provided her unique brand of encouragement from her position on the upper floor.

"Almost there," Booth said cheerfully.

With a deep breath, Sweets reached upwards. "Next time, I'm taking the escalator," he muttered under his breath. There were two ways to reach the second floor, through a climbing wall or by taking an escalator. Sweets was sure it had been some overeager executive's bright idea to offer the option. He could picture it clearly.

"How do we make our client's experience different? When they come here, they don't come just to climb a wall, they come to have an experience!"

"I hate him."

Booth sent him a curious look. "Hate who?"

With a blink, Sweets realized he was talking to himself and wishing ill upon some hypothetical stranger. "Oh my god, this thing is taller than the goddamn Eiffel Tower!"

"C'mon, kid," Booth steeped onto the connecting ledge leading from the wall and turned to haul Sweets to safety. "See? You made it."

"Are you alright, Dr. Sweets?" Brennan extended the promised cinnamon bun. "Here. They're delicious."

"Do I get anything?" Booth unhooked his climbing gear and had to help Sweets and his nerveless fingers do the same.

"You didn't just go through a traumatic experience, Booth."

"So what?" he pouted. "I don't get rewarded for rescuing Sweets?"

Sweets frowned, but couldn't really protest. Considering his heart was still pounding wildly, rescue seemed a fairly accurate description. He munched on his cinnamon bun quietly, hoping to calm his racing heartbeat.

"You can have some of mine," Brennan offered Booth generously, splitting her cheese danish in half. "You know, we have successfully guided Sweets through a crisis," she noted, taking a dainty bite of the sweetly glazed crust. "This is very good parenting practice."

"Hey!" Sweets' head snapped up. "I am not your practice baby!"

Booth smirked. "Close enough." He turned to Brennan with sparkling eyes. "We're gonna be great parents, Bones."

Her answering smile was brilliant. She raised a hand and brushed a stray crumb of pastry from his bottom lip. "The evidence does appear to support that conclusion."

With a resigned forward drop of his head, Sweets could only groan in defeat.

-x-

p.s. I know Bones hasn't be on in forever and it makes it hard to be enthused about fics, but if you're reading, holla back! Letter E is up next!