Disclaimer: The following is a fan-written parody. Ranma ½ is property of Rumiko Takahashi, Studio Deen, Shogakukan, Viz Media, and Madman Entertainment. Support the official release, okay?
Senpai
A Ranma ½ Story
|Warchild|
Two weeks of self-loathing had not been kind to even the most athletic of the hentai horde. Not in a physical sense, thank heaven, but concepts such as self-worth and basic human dignity evaporated quickly in the hours after Akane collectively dumped all of them.
While Kodachi had lit a fire under their collective asses, it was barely a match in the wind. The road to reclaiming their masculinity lay in restoring that which men placed their pride in, first off, physical aptitude and prowess.
"As the new Captain of the Kendo club, there are going to be some changes," Akane announced to the amassed young men. "The first and most important thing is that you'll be expected to all pull your weight. Not a single member will carry their clubs, especially in any of the martial arts clubs. It is because of that laziness that none of you could stand up to Kuno."
Ranma folded his arms, unsure if such a demand could be honored by this menagerie. Kodachi, however, earnestly agreed.
"A bold first step, Tendo Akane!" She declared before addressing the boys directly. "Conquer your own weakness, and your self-loathing and despair shall follow with haste!"
Ranma looked over to Akane, who was dressed in full Kendo gear, and leaning upon the shinai she was about to beat most of these young men silly with. "So what exactly do you plan to do today?"
Akane glanced over. "Determining who's the strongest of these students so that they can become club presidents."
"How're you going to find that out?" Ranma was genuinely curious.
Akane returned her attention to the front. "The same way anything is decided here in this neighborhood."
She lifted up the Shinai and rested it on her shoulder. "We fight it out."
Murmurs rumbled through the crowd. The specter of fighting Akane immediately reminded all of them of the one-sided slaughter that she repeatedly and enthusiastically committed against them on a daily basis. In the weeks since, the reasoning sank in that they had indeed made the wrong call in facing off between her and Kuno–their odds would've been so much better against the latter.
Kodachi sensed their trepidation, and elected to drive her heel into it. "Victory is not the goal in this skirmish! Your goal is merely to show what skill, talent, and strength you have. Those who perform exemplary will not only be elevated to officer position within their respective club, but their club will receive funding in accordance to that performance!"
She pointed the baton of her ribbon at the group. "This is success of the fittest, and I expect a good showing from all of you!"
That caught their attention, a club officer position? Extra club money? Fear quickly drained away, as goals actually worth fighting for gave that weak flame the fuel of ambition. It burned hotter, and the yammering became one of speculation and determination.
Ranma's concern became curiosity, as Akane stepped towards the crowd of young men, the shinai still on her shoulder, while the crowd spread out in a wide half circle around her. He'd heard plenty of her prowess to this point, but now he wanted to see it for himself. Just how did a girl like her take on so many of these guys at once and win with such ease?
Akane looked back at Ranma, and flashed him a smile. "Watch carefully, Ranma!"
She looked ahead at her opponents, before calling out to them. "One at a time, or all at once, just don't hesitate or you won't give it your all."
Kodachi then held up her ribbon, and slashed it through the air like a start flag. "BEGIN!"
There was, naturally, some hesitation at first. However, an industrious young boxer soon overcame his fear entirely, let out a kiai and charged straight for Akane. This immediately opened the floodgates, as soon every student was in a full-bodied charge straight for the Kendo Girl.
Akane lifted the shinai off her shoulder, and took it in both hands. As she neglected to wear her helmet, the charging boys could see the determined smile spread across her lips and the fire of competition burn in her own eyes. Then she was moving forward, kicking off the ground and charging that same boxer who initiated the charge.
"Here I come, Akane-!" His powerful left hook came right for Akane's jaw, as she adjusted the aim of her shinai. At the last second, his punch whiffed her face, as the shinai connected sidelong into his left side, and he was swept away as if captured by the flow of a flash flood.
The boxer went on and a half dozen bodies were soon propelled up and out of the charging crowd like a bomb had gone off. Several more boys were launched as well, this time by Akane directly as her uppercut with the shinai cleared a wedge of them closing in on her from the front.
Ranma perked up at the sheer physicality of Akane's attacks, watching her as she turned around and crossed bamboo with another kendoka, the sheer strength of her strike causing him to hit himself with his own shinai and knock him back. Two karate club members leaped over the falling kendoka, and twisted themselves out of the way when she turned and swung up at them.
One landed behind her, and charged her back. Taking the shinai, she aimed it over her shoulder and pegged him square in the forehead in it, before slamming it down upon the second club member as he tried to attack her while she was distracted.
Stepping over the flattened boy, she ducked and weaved over more strikes from another kendoka, and parried a few more quick, strikes she couldn't dodge. This was effective in allowing other boys to surround and move in, weakening Akane's defensive options.
"Oh, he's good," Kodachi said of the kendoka.
Finally taking one hand off the Shinai, she reached up and caught her opponent's bamboo blade, stopping him long enough to drive the tip of hers into his stomach and fling him into another group of boys.
Flipping the shinai over, she caught it by the handle and assumed a two sword stance, causing Ranma's eyebrows to raise.
"Is she really going to…?" He asked before she went and did it.
Whirling around, she used both shinai with great effect, knocking down and aside those earnestly foolish enough to attempt to get at her back, while using both bamboo blades to keep a circle open where only the bodies of the defeated lay. Her gaze swept left and right, the smile on her face becoming familiar to Ranma as she waited for the next comer.
She didn't have to wait long, as three sumo wrestlers came right at her, faces aggressively painted arms outstretched to swamp her before she could do any harm.
It was for naught. With one shinai, she tagged one of the sumo in the ankle, causing him to stagger, before spinning and sweeping him off his feet with both. As he cartwheeled in place, she drove both bamboo swords into his stomach, and he went spinning backward through the other boys. Sweeping the shinai to her sides, she clocked the other two sumo upside their heads, knocking them both out and leaving them crashing to the ground behind her.
And now Ranma was impressed. Not just at the magical things Akane could do with a couple of tightly bound together bamboo sticks, but the sheer, overwhelming joy that Akane was wearing on her face as she did it. It wasn't like the bloodthirsty smile that he saw with Katie… though it resembled it on the surface. No, Akane was smiling like she this was the first fight she'd ever gotten to enjoy.
"Come on!" Akane called out as she deflected and blocked one fortuitous student's attempt at striking her with a field hockey stick. "Give me everything!"
She turned away from him as she knocked him off his footing, using the time he spent recovering to similarly duel two more kendoka, knocking one out while capturing the shinai of the other and directing him around her to thrust his shinai into the field hockey player's chest. She then conked the deflected kendoka atop his head, dropping him straight down.
"Don't hold back!" She shouted right before another boxer got inside the reach of her bamboo blades and began lightning fast flicker jabs for her head. Bobbing her head, she kept just out of the boxer's reach, as she hopped back with his footsteps forward. When she brought both shinai up to block his strikes, he simply bashed them both aside with a headbutt and then followed with an uppercut, that Akane avoided by flipping up and away, throwing the shinai in her off hand down at his face and laying him out flat.
Kodachi nodded in approval. "There goes our boxing club captain."
Taking the shinai in both hands, Akane fell towards a judo club member, who simply held tightly to the belt of his gi, fire burning in his eyes as he braced himself for her attack. When it came, he didn't move, he didn't block, he simply yelled his kiai and met the shinai with his forehead.
The shinai didn't break, but Akane's momentum went to zero, and the ground buckled beneath the judo student, who screamed again and then lashed out to grab her.
Ranma tensed in excitement when he saw that. Now that was what he wanted to see!
When the judoka's hand clamped onto her shoulder, Akane twisted out of it, and swung the shinai around, only to have it strong armed by his other hand as he thrust the first to palm her back. Akane swung herself around the other way, catching the judoka behind his knees and forcing them to them. And then back around again she came, striking the burly young man across the chest and dropping him on his back.
Even on a warm pleasant day like this, Akane was running so hot that puffs of condensation were clearly visible with her breath, as she turned and charged towards the remaining horde, who were only growing bolder and more decisive with every show of courage from the the likes of those who could last more than a few seconds against her. With the drive to meet her approval replacing their fear of Tatewaki Kuno, they were beginning to see the potential that Kodachi could see in them!
While Ranma could see that potential himself, that was none of his concern at the moment. All he could see was the beautifully grinning Akane as she lost herself in the thrill of combat. It was so distinct from Katie now. The held back impulse to destroy wasn't there, instead there was amazement at her own strength, the excitement of avoiding a strike, and the joy of connecting a blow and defeating an opponent who earned it.
He could've sworn that she'd never experienced something like this, the fun of a real slap down, drag out brawl. If this were a battlefield, like in the old days, she'd be right up there with himself and Katie, a force of nature that swept through everything in her path!
And… Ranma found that he liked that a lot.
"GAHHHHH!" One of the last remaining attackers, some weird kid on a pogo stick, screamed as he was brought down and left unconscious. This left only Akane and one other kendoka, who was armed with a bokken rather than a shinai.
Akane had been keeping an eye on him, he was one of the smarter ones, lurking around the back of the crowd, watching the fight with vested interest. Akane found him interesting, but there was a problem with his pose and intention–there was a complete lack of excitement in it. Both Kodachi and Ranma noticed it as well.
"This guy's not from our school," Ranma realized.
Kodachi nodded. "An excellent observation, he must've slipped into the crowd during the gathering of students." She narrowed her eyes. "A spy from Kolkhoz High School perhaps? Oh Saginomiya, how dare you be so petty…"
"Saginomiya?" Ranma asked.
"Ohohoho, never you mind… that is merely the name of gnat who will soon be crushed," Kodachi replied.
"If he ain't from around here, he might be trouble," Ranma said.
Kodachi disagreed. "I doubt he will be anything more than a footnote in her story of greatness."
The kendoka tightened his grip, and Akane immediately recognized it. It was nothing like the style of kendo that Tatewaki Kuno drilled into his former subordinates. There was also something ominous about it, clear and real intent to do harm to her.
She just smiled, it was nothing compared to what she felt from her senpai. "Whoever you are, you're about to make a mistake."
The masked kendoka just let out a short chuckle, and came right at her, bokken low and body moving fast. His thrust missed as Akane flowed around it, guiding his wooden blade away with her bamboo. What felt like slow-motion suddenly became fast-forward as he recovered from the deflect with all the skill of a professional champion and came at Akane with slashes so fast that the air cracked. Massive, over the head blows mixed with figure-eight patterned swings that were definitely not Kuno's barrage of forward thrusts.
They were fast, very fast. Strikes glanced off Akane's armor that she couldn't deflect with her sword. They came agonizingly close, almost trapping her if not for the slightest twitch, dip, or shift in Akane's stance. It was here, as this mysterious opponent came with every intent to strike her down rather than survive, that Akane's smile did take that characteristic of Katie's… bloodlust seeping in as she recognized this opponent as only an enemy.
Ranma saw it, and he tensed up again. This wasn't going to end well.
Kodachi, however, was on the verge of drooling as she anticipated the outcome of the duel.
She would not be disappointed, as the kendoka suddenly caught Akane's shinai as she attempted to parry a strike–then swung the shinai around and around in a circle before knocking the weapon up and out of her hands, straight up. As the shinai flipped upward, and Akane's gaze was drawn up after it, she realized that she was open right as the kendoka lunged forward, to bring the bokken down on the top of her head.
"Know your place, Furinkan dog!" The swordsman shouted as the blade came down on her head… and hit nothing. "Huh?!"
That's because the bokken had been snatched from his hands when Akane caught it flat between hers and gently wrenched it free. Twirling the bokken around in her hands, she caught it by its hilt, as her opponent slowly turned towards her, his eyes growing large.
It was at this moment that he knew: he fucked up.
Akane's newly claimed bokken slammed into his crotch, shattering the skirt armor of his kendo uniform and the cup he wore to protect his berries. The impact came with such force that the bokken shattered as well, as he was lifted off the ground a good meter and a half. Casting the destroyed wooden sword over her shoulder, she kept her hand above her head and caught her shinai by the handle, before taking it in both hands and rearing back to aim a thrust straight for the kendoka's sternum.
"My place is standing over you… with my heel grinding your head!" She yelled before she fired off the thrust, the tip of the shinai striking her target dead on and accelerating him, not unlike Kuno and Genma as done by Katie, into a terminal flight straight into one of the corner windows of the top floor of the school, where he struck with a loud bang.
Thanks to the building's renovation and reinforcement, however, all the foolish kendoka left was a smear of blood and drool as he slid down the side of the now mostly glass building to the ground three stories below.
Panting, Akane lowered her shinai and looked around the unconscious or stirring young men she pummeled into the dirt. She then looked over to Kodachi and Ranma, her smile regaining all of its beautiful properties while losing all of the darker aspects. "So, how was that?!"
Kodachi began to applaud, certainly impressed. "That was magnificent, Tendo Akane."
"Yeah, you were pretty good out there," Ranma admitted.
Kodachi then gave Ranma a teasing look. "Certainly fine marriage material, wouldn't you agree, Mr. Fiancé?"
Ranma began to blush somewhat, as he was put on the spot. "I'm not saying she's not."
Not at all, in fact… seeing this side of Akane just made the prospect and conflict of marrying one of the Tendo girls all the more difficult. One by one, they were all really starting to show how amazing they were. But admitting it outright brought on so much baggage that he was almost afraid to. Bad enough that he would have to acknowledge his father for bringing him here, but then he would actually have to choose one.
Kodachi whistled, and a number of her handsome gentlemen were at her side in a flash. She then gestured to the beaten young men. "Take them to the infirmary. Our new nursing staff shall administer onto them the finest of care. Do not look down upon them, for they have taken the first step to become fine young men like yourselves."
"Yes, Kodachi-sama!" The gentlemen chorused before getting to work.
Akane walked over, still a bit huffy. "I'll have the list of club presidents in a moment, Kodachi-san."
"Yes, keep that fresh in your head. For now, we must deal with the intruder upon our garden," Kodachi said as she and Ranma turned towards the unconscious kendoist.
Akane stepped up as well, and nodded. "Yeah, let's go get Katie-senpai, some discipline is in order."
A/N: Treachery afoot! Review please.