Firstly thank you, as ever, for continuing to read and reply. I hugely appreciate it! You may have sense that we've plateaued slightly in recent updates and I hope that this hasn't been too dull, or samey for you to ready. I know I do usually move at pace with my writing. Needless to say we are approaching a cliff face, and this is somewhat of a calm before a storm chapter. Things are about to ratchet up in intensity imminently!

I'm also wondering whether the pace of the updates is good for you guys? Feel free to let me know if it's too fast. I wouldn't update any faster than every few days as I tend to normally, but would it be better if it were longer between updates? Any comments, good or bad always welcomed in the pursuit of improvement! :)

"Oh and look at this one Leni, see how it's got those big claws?"

"It's scary."

"They're not going to hurt you, sweetheart, it's so that it can get into its food. Like big nuts, or things that are tough to open and…."

"That's very scientific, very accurate…." snorted Calvin, chuckling to himself from behind the double buggy as he and Evie strolled casually around the zoo.

"Ignore your mean Uncle!" she shot back, narrowing her eyes and poking out her tongue.

Walking slightly ahead, Elena's hand held tightly in hers Eve felt the most contented she had in a long time. It felt good to be outside, and the weather was even on their side, with a warm Spring sunshine at their backs. Leni was a joy to look after, always smiling, chatting, she made Eve laugh. It also brought her a joy she couldn't quite explain, that despite everything, after all that had happened, the Amaro and Stabler families were now managing to come together for this little girl. It takes a village, she thought to herself, as Leni skipped along beside her.

"Look Uncle Calvin! Fat monkeys!"

"I think that they're baboons, sweetie…." corrected Eve, stifling a laugh.

"Cuántos hay?" asked Calvin, rotating with Evie and lifting Elena up so that she could see better into the enclosure.

"Are we counting them?" guessed Eve, manoeuvring the buggy so that the twins could see and so that she was stood closer to him.

"Cinco!" cried Leni with maintained enthusiasm, one chubby hand clamped around Calvin's neck and the other waving wildly at the baboons.

"Good job, Legs."

"They are really, really ugly, huh?" noted Eve, wrinkling her nose as one of the animals itched itself indelicately. "He's loving that butt scratch he's having there…."

"Bambi you're hilarious…." smiled Calvin, shunting his hips sideways and deliberately jostling her.

"Remember when we first came here? You brought me when we were kids?"

"I remember….." he nodded, meeting her eyes and sharing in the fond memory, "… you were equally grossed out by the animal kingdom."

"Hey!"

"I mean you've now had two kids and I saw those two nuggets come straight out of your…."

"Cal!" she yelped, giving his arm a sharp smack and shaking her head rapidly knowing just how bright Elena was.

"So you have no right to judge Butt Scratcher over here for…."

"Shut up!" she groaned, but she was laughing, giggling, like a teenager again around him. "You're such hard work!"

"Whatever, you still love me!" he shot back unthinking, and then catching himself his face fell in panic. He shouldn't have said that, at least not then, not in that moment.

"I do…." she said quietly, reaching for his hand and sliding hers into it, "… you're right."

"So, I, ermm, I reckon we should probably see about getting us some lunch…." he stumbled.

"Ice cream!"

"No, no proper food, cheeky monkey…." smiled Eve, seemingly not fazed, "… maybe later you can get an ice cream."

"I am so glad that you did not tell me this story on the phone. I don't think I'd have slept a single night for the rest of your trip if I'd known."

"They were just guns Mom. You walked around this city armed for how many years?"

"I'm not a Mexican cartel member!" laughed Olivia, throwing her head back and laughing with wide rolling eyes at her son's casual approach. "Well, anyways Sammy needless to say I'm blissfully happy to have you home safe."

"I'm happy to be home too."

"It sounds like you had a wonderful adventure…." she said, smiling warmly at Sam who smiled back and nodded emphatically.

"I really did."

"You seem like you're in a really good place, son. It's good to see, really, really good to see."

"I'm exited Mom. I feel like I'm finally getting somewhere, going somewhere, making something of my life. This car shop with Calvin is gonna be awesome. I get to work with my best friend, my buddy, my bro, and we get to make some money and build something together. It doesn't get any better, right?"

"Right, right I'm excited for you both. Have you spoken to Cal? I mean have you…."

"Yeah, yeah I have."

"Does he seem…." hesitating, Olivia trailed off. She could hear Elliot in the back of her mind, cautioning her with getting too involved. Maybe this was really was something that they all just needed to work through on their own.

"Different?" offered Sam, bringing her back into the conversation. "Yeah, yeah I mean sometimes. Not if we're just having a laugh, not if we're just hanging out. I think he's a little messed up about the stuff with Vee and Texas though. I guess that's not surprising."

"No, no it isn't."

"What'd you think Mom?" asked Sam, curious. "What'd you think he should do? How'd you think this should all play out now?"

"I really can't comment on that Sammy, I don't think any of us can."

"I can! I don't care what the hell they do as long as the status quo changes. I want this cloud to lift. I want things to get back to normal around here without all the moping and the long looks and the weird fug Calvin and Evie are both in."

"That's a big smile for a sad girl."

"Sad girl?" not a tag she took kindly to being associated with Eve started a little perplexed at her brother. "Is that how you see me?"

"No! I was just teasing, not at all." he said, but the die was already cast. "Can we just rewind to me asking why the big smile? Why are you rocking a snazzy two piece at noon on a random Thursday?"

"I got a job, Sammy…." biting her lip, still grinning, Eve kicked up her heel and did a little twirl. Her purse dangled a little awkwardly, her hair caught the breeze she created, and her brother's smile was as wide as the Atlantic.

"That's more like it! Way to go, Vee!" he whooped, punching the air and wheeling over to give her a hug. "I didn't even know you had an interview? Do we really still have that much to catch up on?"

"I didn't tell anyone."

"Seriously?"

"It was just something I had to do for myself, by myself, if that makes any sense?" to him, it made perfect sense, so much so he just took a moment. "It's nothing huge, nothing fancy. I'm basically one step up from an unpaid intern but I got a really good vibe from them."

"Who? Who is it? Where's the job at?" he asked, intently curious and deeply invested in anything that had his sister so bright and engaged with life. "You want a coffee? Soda? Come take a pew and tell me about it."

"Water would be awesome I feel someone sucked my mouth dry. I talked and talked, thank God something I said clearly made an impact. So it's a non-profit over in Brooklyn and I saw their poster in a bathroom."

"Wait you answered a job advert you saw in a bathroom stall?" asked Sam, handing her a glass of water and pulling a face. "Should I be worried about what trade you're getting into here Vee?"

"Ha! No! No, I mean they had a poster offering their support in a bathroom and I saw it and it kind, well, it sound stupid…."

"You are stupid so…."

"Hey!"

"Shoot from the hip, sis, trust me when I say there is no one more completely on your side than I am. This is a safe space…." gesturing his arms in circular motions Sam was being just a tiny bit facetious but it made her giggle, and more than comfortable enough to continue.

"It's for rape and sexual assault survivors, that's what they do, that's who they are."

"Wow…"

"I just sat there peeing and I looked over and I saw literally the ugliest and the worst presented poster I ever saw."

"I'm staying with this, waiting for the…."

"I redesigned it. I loved their message but I hated their marketing so I used what I know, what I learned, what I minored in in college and I found an advert for a data entry clerk at their company…."

"Wait? Their data entry clerks design their marketing materials?"

"No, no but you don't get if you don't ask right? So I went to that interview and then when they asked if I had any questions I said that I did. I asked them whether they would take a look at the poster, and the other materials I'd worked on. I suggested that their tone was off, that as a survivor myself I felt like their message was a little…." tilting her head one way and then the other she shrugged, "… confused."

"So you hijacked an interview and told the company that their work sucked? You insulted them?"

"I made some constructive suggestions!"

"You're are quite something Evie Grace!" he laughed, deep and open. "How did they not tell you to go to hell?"

"I don't know….." she smiled, then it broadened to a toothy grin as she hunched her shoulders with excitement, "…maybe my luck is turning."

"So what? They just loved your work and offered you a job right there and then?"

"No, not quite. They tore my work to pieces and pretty much told me I was way out of line to do what I did."

"Okay…."

"But then I guess they said something about me having balls and a little fire and that they made no big promises but they liked me and if I wanted to be a junior, junior, junior, dogsbody in their marketing team then I could have it for a princely sum per annum."

"A princely sum?"

"Would not even cover rent."

"Gotcha."

"I don't know if it's right Sammy, maybe I should've talked to someone before I did it. I don't know. Maybe this is me being too chicken to apply to the Academy, or maybe it's a sign I shouldn't do that at all. I don't know. The one thing I do know is that I went in there today and it felt good. I was nervous but I talked myself up. I put on my game face, I picked up my pompoms and I talked at them and I was bossy, and a know it all, and audacious and annoying and…."

"Totally awesome."

"You don't think it's crazy? You don't think I'm crazy?"

"Well, I mean, yes and yes. You didn't tell anyone you were doing this? Not even Cal or Mom?"

"I didn't think anything would come of it. I just did the stuff while I was home with the kids, it started out as kind of just a way to keep my brain alive and then it just kind of….." shrugging Eve added quietly, "… became something else."

"So that's what you've been sketching and writing lately!"

"I have until Friday at noon to let them know whether or not I'm going to accept their offer."

"Wait, what? You didn't accept already? Evie!"

"I have two kids, Sammy. Who's gonna take care of them? I have no clue where Calvin and I are at right now and it's not going to help the situation my just blindsiding him with another of Evie's grand ideas of what to do with her life."

"So you're gonna talk to him about it?"

"Sam of course I am, he's my husband."

"I know, sure, I know that I just…."

"We're a little bashed up right now but we're still us, we're still married, we're still a family. I don't know what this would mean for us."

"So full disclosure?"

"What?"

"I may have had a grand idea of my own and I may have made Calvin somewhat of a proposition. I just didn't know about what you were planning, or I would've run it past you both at the same time."

"Wow, we sure do seem to have some communication issues in this family these days. What kind of proposition?"

"The car shop."

"The one he's been talking to Dad about?"

"I wanna go fully in with him Vee. I wanna get a joint loan, help him get credit with the bank if I can. We'll do it together, me and him, as partners."

"Wow."

"Now it's your turned to be a little stunned, huh?"

"No! No, I mean yeah, but I think it's a great idea. It's such a good idea, it's exiting. You should go for it, both of you."

"He said he'd think about it. I assume he needs to talk to you first."

"Then I guess he and I have a lot to talk about."

"Not a face I thought I'd see come through here."

"I'm glad you accepted my request to come."

"Everything okay?" asked Texas, a little concerned as she sat opposite Eve in the cubicle. "I mean Leni she's…."

"She's really great, Texas. Honestly, she's the best little kid. She misses you, she sends kisses I saw her this morning."

"You did?"

"Calvin has her at our place sometimes, she likes the yard and the swing….." not entirely sure where the lines where, were the boundaries of what would constitute normal or appropriate lay anymore Eve shrugged, "… she's teaching my mom some Spanish. They hang out."

"There are a hell of a lot worse people she could be hanging out with than your mom. I'm really glad. And you're okay with it? Having her at your place and…."

"Tex she's family, she is. I can't say that loud enough…." swiping everything off the table in one defiant movement Eve found Texas' eyes, "… you both are."

"That's pretty big of you….." acknowledged Texas, a little guarded, a little wary considering all that had happened, "… considering."

"Texas…."

"We don't have to talk about it Evie. I just don't really know what you want from me, what you want me to say. I wronged you and I know it. You and your mom, your whole family, have shown me kindnesses again and again that it's questionable whether or not I deserved. I repaid you in spades by using and drinking and letting you down….." she was harder, a little tougher to reach than she had been when she'd started her sentence several months earlier noted Eve, "… and kissing your husband."

"It's complicated, we both know that."

"What do you want Eve? Why'd you come?" pushed Texas, unable to escape the feeling that she was somehow walking into a trap. "Why'd you come here?"

"I guess I've just been trying to get my head around it all. Calvin isn't in a great place, neither of us are I don't know what any of it means. I'm not here to be mad at you for the kiss, I'm just trying to process everything that's going on and I thought, well, I just had to talk to you."

"Well you've got approximately twenty seven more minutes to do that so you might wanna start coming around to your main conversation points sooner rather than later."

"Are you angry with me?"

"No, nah, I'm sorry, mija, I didn't mean to snap."

"But you…."

"I'm a junkie trying to stay clean locked up in a candy store of narcotics. I'm one bitch slap from these idiots away from drinking myself into oblivion on a daily basis. My daughter has her birthday next week and I'll spend it in this glorious establishment missing every minute. I'm not quite sure what it is that you want me to say Evie."

"I…."

"I'm trying to figure out my crap. I'm trying to be a better person. I'm trying to stop hiding and really face up to who I am, to all that am, and to all the things I'm most afraid of. I can barely find my own answers, mija. I sure as hell can't find you yours!"

"Do you love him?"

"Who Calvin?"

"I suppose what I mean is….." because she had to hear it, she had to know, because she trusted that Texas would know her own heart even if Calvin didn't know his, "…are you in love with him?"

"Are you?"

"I…."

"Because it seems to me that if you were we wouldn't be having this conversation."

"What? No! No that…"

"I know where I go when I'm frightened. I know where I go when I'm hurt and confused. I drink and I use and I sleep with the wrong men and plenty of them. I accept that I have not made good choices, or found good ways to cope with my life. But what about you, pretty girl? What do you hide behind?"

"I don't know."

"Don't you?" pushed Texas, and Eve didn't mind.

She didn't even flinch. She needed this, it was strangely liberating, detoxifying, to have someone speak to her that way. Like she wouldn't break, like she was far from perfect, and like they weren't afraid to fire a disabling shot if it stopped her running entirely off the road. Texas was angry, emotional, like a wild animal backed into a corner and chained but she still cared. She was still sitting there, and it was strangely her opinion Eve wanted to hear most.

"I suppose I hide behind my family. I hide behind my Mom and Dad. I run home. I get scared, or hurt and I run home. I know they'll protect me. I know they'll take care of me until I'm feeling strong again."

"Well okay then, now we're really talking honestly."

"You didn't answer my question…." dared Eve, her fingers wrapping a little tighter around the telephone receiver.

"You want me to say it? You really wanna hear it?"

"I think I need to."

"Yes, Blancanieves. The answer to your question is yes, I am in love with Calvin."

"I think I already knew that."

"You wanna know something else? While we're doing this thing, this girl talk, this sharing, this whatever the hell we're doing here? If that ring you're wearing had been on my finger? If he'd been my husband and you'd kissed him? I'd have clawed your fucking eyes out."

"I…."

"Fight for him, Evie. For God's sake! Get angry, get pissed, call me names, curse my very existence! I kissed your husband and I enjoyed it and that should make you furious. It should make you blind with anger, insanely jealous and cut so deep you want to cut me and have it hurt twice as much."

"But you're you! You and he have this thing! You're too close for me to do that!"

"No, no Evie…." said Texas slowly, her eyes locking Evie's in a way that was more of a plea than a threat, "… we're too close for you not to do that."

"Wow…." swallowed Eve, winded by the power of the older woman's words.

"All I ask, the only thing I will ever ask of you is that you love him. You love him and you fight for him, you fight for him like he's something you can't bear to lose and you put him first the way he always does you."

"Texas…."

"If you love him, if you want him, if you're in love with him and being with him is what you want then you fight for him; you fight for your marriage. I promise I'll get out the way. I swear it. You won't have any trouble from me. I won't come between the two of you again you have my word."

"I wasn't..." she had lost words, at that point, so turned over where Eve's insides. Then suddenly, quite out of nowhere, she heard herself say, "What you did for him? What you're doing for him, here. It's really beautiful Tex. I know it's not about me, I know it was him and the kids you did it for but just so you know, well, I just wanted to say: thank you."

"De nada."

"I really need to talk to you Cal."

"Yeah, yeah me too actually."

"I think I know what you're going to say. I spoke to Sammy."

"Right, right of course you did."

"No! No it wasn't like that. Please don't think it was. He and I were just talking about something that I've got going on, an opportunity that's presented itself to me and it all just kind of came out in the wash."

"What opportunity?"

"A job offer."

"Wow, wow that's amazing. What job?"

"I'd be like a junior, not quite sure what they'd call me, an associate I guess, in a marketing department. The marketing department of a non-profit based out of Brooklyn, they support survivors of rape and sexual assault. It sounds amazing, everything I've read and seen about them. I think I could do a lot of good."

"Evie that's incredible….." marvelled Calvin, genuinely in awe as he slid across the sofa and grabbed for her hand, "… you took it, right? You told them you'll take it?"

"I…."

"You did that stuff, right? At Brown? Words are your thing, you'd be awesome at marketing."

"But what about your car shop, babe? Sam lit up this room talking about the two of you setting it up together. It's what you've been dreaming about too, right?"

"Do we have to pick just one?" asked Calvin simply, sitting back a little and thinking on the notion. "I mean sure it might be hard, but we can figure it out I reckon. I could take the babies to work with me…."

"Not really…." she smiled, adoring his sentiment, his enthusiasm, but not sure of the practicalities, ".. not as they get bigger."

"Leni loves helping me fix up cars, maybe they will too."

"Calvin we'd need childcare and I don't know that I feel comfortable asking my Mom and Dad. This is supposed to be their time, they're supposed to be taking it easier not taking on twin babies full time."

"No, no I agree."

"Okay then I think…."

"You should take the job….." he said, and the words crashed into her suggestion simultaneously uttered.

"You should open the garage with Sammy."

"Damn it!" she laughed, still holding his hand.

"What'd we do now, Bambi?" he asked, as they hit an impasse. "I can wait, we can hold our plans a while. I mean your job offer is now; it's time sensitive, right? They're not gonna hang around."

"But you've been talking about wanting to give a car shop a try ever since you first put your papers in. It was your big thing, it was what you wanted to do if you weren't in the Army. It was part of the whole moving back to New York plan, right?"

"Evie you deserve this. It's your turn…." widening his eyes, joking in a moment of sincerity the way only Calvin could he put on a voice, "… it's your time to shine."

"But…."

"It's what I want, Bambi. You taking this job? You getting your confidence back? It's what I want. Will you let me do this for you? I'm asking you to let me doing this for you. I'll take the babies, I'll be Mr Mom a while."

"But are you sure Cal?" she asked, then seesawing back again she shook her head, "No, no I can't. We have to figure out another way, we have to find a way we can both get what we want."

"We will, sure we will, in time. I just need for you to call those people and tell them it's on, tell them Evie G is in the house before they change their minds. Babe I haven't seen you smile, you buzz like this in a really long time. Don't let that get away, okay? I won't let you."

"Calvin…."

"The car shop can wait, we'll do our research. Sammy and I will work on our ideas and then maybe in the future we can get the kids into a daycare, or something, when they're older?"

"Yeah, yeah sure, definitely."

"Go make that call, girl…." he smiled, leaning forward and pressing an encouraging kiss firmly against her forehead, "…. I love you."

"I love you too!" she gasped, grabbing his face and kissing him firmly on the lips for the first time since his fated prison visit. "Thank you! Thank you for supporting me, Cal!"

"You got it, Bambi….." he smiled, laughing to himself as she skipped from the room with her cell phone already at her ear. Sitting back on the couch, folding his arms across his chest, he nodded to himself, secure in the knowledge that had had done the good thing, the right thing.

"I hate this."

"What's that, my love?" asked Olivia absentminded, leafing through a magazine while sat up in bed.

"Don't get me wrong I want Evie to take this job. She's so excited, it sounds like a great opportunity and it keeps here out of the force but…."

"She needs this, El." Said Olivia frankly, setting down her magazine and giving him her full attention. "That girl has been drifting aimlessly, lost in her own life for too long. She's so young, she's too full of energy and passion and life to just sit cooped up in this house day in day out hesitating."

"And what about Sammy, huh?" shrugged Elliot challengingly. "He's waited years for this, to finally have something he can get his teeth into. He came back so excited about starting the car shop with Cal. He's got all these ideas, Liv, he's been showing be plans and budgets and projected profits. The full works. He's ready, he's been standing on the cliff edge all this time and he's finally ready to jump."

"I know, I know and…."

"He can't do it without Calvin. Calvin staying at home with the babies ends Sammy's big plans. He needs his buddy, not just for the moral support, for the way the work together, but because Cal's the damn mechanic!"

"You're really throwing yourself behind their plan all of a sudden? Not that I'm against it, just, well, I'm curious. What's changed? You were ready to string Calvin up a couple of weeks ago."

"I've mellowed."

"You have not!" she laughed, rolling her eyes.

"Liv you say Evie's lost but honestly they all are. I guess I just see Cal as the danger spot here."

"You do?" she was listening, because it was rare that Elliot spoke so passionately about anything he hadn't fully worked through in his own mind. The way his face fell, the concentration in his blue eyes worried her. "Has he said something?"

"It's more what he hasn't said, and we both know I'm the king of that old trick. Leaving the military is huge, it's a huge deal and I don't really think that anyone has noticed that he's done that. He's just absorbed it. He's moved Evie and the kinds back up here and just walked out on the person he'd become."

"That might be a little over…."

"No, Liv. Trust me on this? Trust me when I say that for a kid like Calvin, someone who's had no structure, no guidance, no role model or at least no positive one as a kid? There is a comfort like nothing else in putting on that uniform every day."

"You think this car shop will give him his purpose back?"

"I think he deserves it just the same as our kids do. I don't think should be choosing who gets the prize here. I think we should be trying to figure out a way that they all do."

"Wow, wow Elliot that's…." he had surprised her, she hated to admit that, but he had completely blown her away.

"He was wrong to kiss Texas, but we all know he's not a bad guy. So it kinda begs the question, what's going on in his head? Where's he at? He's giving Evie the green light to take this job, saying he'll take on childcare full time, but that's not right."

"What are you proposing?"

"That we help them."

"Okay, how?"

"We keep the house, we don't sell up and we put it up as collateral against getting this car shop off the ground. We go in, all in, as a family."

"Elliot that's a huge decision, that is a massive, massive decision."

"And I'm not saying it's right, or it's what we should do for sure but I'm putting it on the table. I want you to think about it. We do that for the boys, Mouse accepts the job offer and and we run daycare for the twins."

"Elliot you are constantly on my back about how much we sit for them already! This is a total 180 on that, to take them all day every day?"

"Not forever, just until they're old enough for day care? Besides we'll do it together, both of us."

"I mean everything you're saying makes sense. It's a logical plan; it solves all of their problems."

"You hate it?"

"No! No I don't hate it at all its…." laughing, a little breathless at how much she admired him in that moment, Olivia reached out for his face and kissed him lovingly, "… you are a good man Elliot Stabler, and I love you so very much."