"The Chinese Prisoner…"
Summary: A surprisingly modest Howard has returned to a global hero's welcome after an incredible space feat…But he brought some baggage home…
Disclaimer: All that is Chuck's is Chuck's…
Part XXI…
Oh…God…Penny, opening bleary eyes, raising head from mattress on the bedroom floor…
Never again…Kahlua and s'mores at 1am just do not mix…Oh…Head…She sat up…
Hmmn…Bernadette's up…Amy's up…I can guess where…She looked over to where Lilly was sound asleep on mattress…
God, she even sleeps elegantly…She looked for the clock…
Hmmn…Eight?...
Am?...
Whoa…Thanks guys, whichever of you made sufficient noise to wake me at this ungodly…
Oh, right…Alarm…Big day…
OH…Geesh…
Big bad day…She eyed the sleeping Lilly…
Gotta get up before she does…Go see Leonard even if I promised not to…Something's gotta be…
Hmmn…She glanced over…Woulda thought an astronaut?...Is it net for a girl?...Woulda hopped right up on an alarm for a day like today…
Too much Kahlua…She rose, groaning audibly…
Sorry…She hissed…
Hmmn…Nothing…
I guess she's learned to sleep through…She blinked at the bottle by Lilly's mattress…
My, those look like…She moved closer, picking up and pulling on a robe dropped by her mattress the night before…
Oh, yeah…She read the label…
Sleeping pills…An empty bottle of…
"Lilly!?...Lilly!?...Oh, my God!..." she grabbed the slender girl, shaking…
Ooof!...She groaned at Lilly's sudden blow…Sharp cry in Chinese, vicious look…
"Penny?..." Lilly, now awake, staring… "What the hell were you doing?!...Penny, I'm sorry…Are you ok?..."
Maybe I misinterpreted things between her and Amy?...I thought the galoot's poor repressed honey was the one either hinting at bisexual openness or cleverly keeping a close eye on her nemesis or both…
"Penelope, really not into this sorta thing, sweetie…" she noted… "Sorry about the instinctive response, though…"
"What?...No…Lilly…" Penny in mid-groan held up the empty bottle… "I thought you'd taken these…"
"Yeah?...I did take two…I couldn't sleep…Oh…" Lilly nodded after a brief consideration… "Thought I'd decided to take the short exit, eh?..." smile… "No, not yet, honey…Though I'm not adverse to the easy way out…"
"But where's…?" Penny shook the bottle…
"Like I say…I'm not adverse to the easy way…They're safe, in case I should want them later on…But where's there's still life, I say hang on by your long exquisitely manicured fingernails…" grin…
"You have them…Just in case…?"
"Beating to death musses and really hurts, however good Raul Julia looked in 'Kiss of the Spider Woman' after his workover…" Lilly noted… "As does burial alive ala 'Shanghai Triad'…And death by gang rape isn't much fun and likewise can muss one really bad…" wan smile… "Sorry if my lack of heroism disappoints you…"
"I was just scared you mighta…" Ow…She felt her stomach…
"Howie would never forgive himself…So, no…Not here, anyway…" smile, then concerned look… "You sure you're ok?..."
"Yeah…Where did you learn…?"
"Labor camp…It becomes an instinctive thing when someone makes a move on you every night while sleeping…Though actually it was Howie who looked up the move for me on 'Legends of Kung Fu' years ago…Sorry if I hurt you…"
"No, it's ok…But about those pills…"
"Where they won't find them…Easily…" smile…
"Lilly, this is insane…You can't just go and let them kill you…Or worse…"
Frown…"They won't hand over my guys without me in exchange…Penelope, we done been through this and it's my own business…"
"I could tell Howard…" Penny eyed her… "He'd never let you do this…"
"Penelope…You don't want me to go all Canton over your ass…" Lilly frowned… "I could leave you all Vulcan nerve pinch paralyzed for days and poor Leonard worrying and all…Plus the medical bills would louse up your wedding plans…"
Penny, stern look… "You're lyin'…You look just like Howard when he lies like that about his kung fu moves…"
"Fine…" sigh… "Ok…I can't paralyze you…" hard stare… "But I won't let my family suffer, not even to spare Howie grief over a friend…Don't make me hurt you or worse…Because that I can do…I mean it, Penny…My back-up plan for my break at the science module if they forced me to have a partner up there was to blow the hatch and toss the guy or gal into space…One of the teammates I'd trained with for years…Don't press me here…If you wanna scream and yell after they got me and the family's ok, fine…It might even help…But not before…"
"Please at least let me talk to Leonard…" Penny pleaded… "He might know what to do…"
They eyed each other…Giggling after a second…
"Sorry…He's a sweet guy…Really…" Lilly, shaking head…
"He still might surprise us…He has me, from time to time…Howard does…Constantly these days…Look, please…I promise we won't do anything that will endanger your family…"
Hesitant pause, shrug…"Well, since you're gonna tell him no matter what I say…And I don't want to explain how your body has my claw marks…"
"I'm not as easy to take out as you might think, sweetie…" Penny frowned…"Let me try…For Howard's sake…If you love him, don't let him blame himself…You know he will…"
Sigh, reluctant shake of head…"Not a word to Howie…Or I'll just claim you Yankee running dogs of imperialism are tryin' to snatch me from the tender arms of the Motherland for your nefarious capitalist purposes…" grin…
"Exactly…" Penny nodded, grin… "And where's there life…But where are those pills, Lilly?..." hard stare…
"Tickling my fancy…So to speak…" smile… "Thank God I'll be standing most of today…"
"Oh…Hello Leonard…"
"Amy?..." Leonard stared at her in the hallway as he carried a glass of juice, making for the couch… "Did you just come over?..."
"Why…Yes…" she beamed… "Sheldon called to say he was feeling ill…So I came over…A short time ago…"
Well that explains the Star Trek doc's uniform…He considered…
Geesh…She does look kinda…He eyed her in the trim blue…
No…Lets not go there, Hofstadter…
"You're up early…And no Penny with you?..." she regarded him…
"She's still sleeping back at her place…Say, did you guys by any chance…Before opting for Star Trek nighties…Talk about Penny's little Howard fixation last night?...I mean her previous, now over Howard fixation?..."
"Hmmn?...No…" Amy shook head…"But I'm pleased to hear you feel it's over and have discussed it with her…I'm sure with honesty and open discussion these feelings can be dealt with…In time…"
"I think Penny's worked it out…"
"Perhaps…But given how well matched excepting physique she and Howard were, and his hero status drawing her ET-worshipping soul like a magnet draws iron fillings I would be hesitant to call it over just yet…"
"She accepted my proposal…"
"Yes…Well…" Amy shrugged… "Not meaning to trash talk my bestie…She can find it difficult to maintain even a solemn vow of fidelity given her physical endowments and charms…The girl can't help it, Leonard…"
"I'm sure she'll manage…" frown…
"Blind love is beautiful…" she nodded… "But please know Sheldon and I stand ready to support you two…Knowing as I do that Penny does love you more than anyone else in this world…"
"Amy?..." he smiled at her, taking seat… "That's very sweet of you, thanks…"
"Though again in her situation that may not count for all that much…" she reflected… "But we have our Pavlovian bag of tricks at hand whenever you require them…I know and have her confirmatory signature that it's what she'd want…"
"Thanks…"
He hesitated… "Any idea why Bernadette took off and came here so early, if Penny didn't say anything?...Did she and Lilly have a fight?...She said she didn't but…"
Nod…"Wise of you to doubt her veracity…Bernadette is the type to keep savage catfights for the man she loves in the family…But no, not that I was aware of… In fact, Bernadette and I slept in the living room after our wild night of Kahlua and s'mores-fed indulgence…And we had no reason to catfight…Savagely…" Pause…
"I guess so…" he sipped his juice… "But something's…What?..." he regarded her stare…
"I believe it's a tradition Sheldon has established to provide a hot beverage to guests…" she noted, careful stare…
"Hmmn?...Oh, I'm sorry…There's coffee in the kitchen…"
"Yes…" she nodded, waiting…
"You'd like some?..." he said, finally…Eyeing her…
"Thank you…And some tea for Sheldon too, please…"
"Right…" he rose with a sigh…
"Doctor Fowler…Medical emergency on S-deck!..." Sheldon's call…
"On my way!..." call… "Pardon me…Sheldon's in need of me…" beam…
"Damn about time…" Leonard noted…With smile at end…
"Indeed…" she nodded…Return smile…Pausing…
"Lilly, I'm sure…Not Penny…" she said… "Don't worry…"
"Thanks, Amy…" he nodded…
"Black on the coffee…Two sugars, no lemon on the tea…While he's still able to call it breakfast tea, please?..."
"Right…" he nodded…