The rest of November faded by into nothingness as Harry endured thoughts of his godfather, his situation, and the people around him. Alice still gave him horrible looks as though she was telling him to crawl into a hole in the earth and die, but thankfully the rest of the Hogwarts girls didn't see him that way so very much. A few weeks after the discovery in Lupin's office, a very attractive Ravenclaw girl with sleek brown hair and sweet brown eyes asked him to show her a few tricks on a broomstick because she wanted to try out for the Ravenclaw Quidditch team in the following year. Harry would have liked for nothing more than to spend time alone with her and show her a few things, but his heart just wasn't it in, and though he knew he was being idiotic, he had turned her down.

Still over and over his thoughts turned back to Hermione. It didn't seem like she was avoiding him, it only seemed as though they just couldn't find the time to coordinate greetings. It really bothered him, for he had completely opened himself to her and now she was never around.

On December 21, he went back to Grimmauld Place, and even Ron and Alice's presence there could do little to dampen the excitement that was brewing in him on the long train ride back to London.

It was Mrs. Weasley who collected them from the train station, and Harry couldn't help but notice that she seemed a bit stiff with him, which no doubt had everything to do with Alice. Neville was daydreaming and Ron and his psychotic sister were shooting him viper-like looks every few minutes as though trying to make sure he was kept in place. Mrs. Weasley practically ignored him altogether. He was beginning to feel a bit down until they walked through the entryway to Number 12, Grimmauld Place, and suddenly the world was so much brighter. He saw the same round of familiar faces and for the rest of the evening he felt normal.

Then, at ten o'clock, his parents came back from watching what he assumed was the door to the Department of Mysteries. He watched them come into the ragged old house from the sofa in the next room, and as soon as he saw his mother's weary face his heart nearly burst in his chest. Seeing her smile had been worth the last few months of hell at school.

Hugs and affections were exchanged and Harry felt as though it were not enough. He wanted to talk to them to just experience being around them, what they discussed or did wasn't of the least importance, only that he was able to do it. He was so ecstatic to be back with them that he almost forgot to worry about Sirius' impending trial that would come in the next two days. And for the first time since he honestly could remember, he slept somewhat peacefully that night.

The next morning his mother went with Emmeline Vance on some kind of Order errand and he got to spend much of the day with his father. They talked about stupid things for quite a while, and James had the intuition not to ask Harry about Alice. As blind as he had been about Lily's emotions for him in his school days, it was just hard to deny that Alice absolutely despised his son with the way she turned her head away every time Harry entered the room or slammed things unnecessarily loud in his presence. And since he still wanted to keep the peace with the Weasley family, he knew it would just be better to stay out of it.

They were sitting on the ugly couch again in the former Black family room talking about Quidditch postings when a comfortable silence came over them. Harry began to think of everything that had been eating him away inside for the past several months when for some reason it just occurred to him to ask.

"Dad?"

"Yeah?"

"I was wondering, why didn't the Longbottoms come to your party the night that, well, you know-"

James's face grew cold and pale as he turned to face his son and ask why he would ask such a question. His expression softened as he realized Harry wasn't trying to be insensitive.

"It's kind of amazing that you never asked me that before. I never really talked to anyone about it, not even your mum. Well, Frank and I used to be good friends at Hogwarts. He was a few years ahead of me, but he was awesome at Quidditch and he was on the team and to me, he was just always kind of a, well, mentor I guess you could say. When I graduated from Hogwarts and I told him I wanted to become an Auror as well, he seemed happy about the idea. He helped me out while I was at the Auror Academy too. He was just a great guy, you know?"

Harry couldn't help but pick up the wistful and almost pained tone in his father's voice and he felt the pain with him.

"Well, what happened?" Harry asked, half afraid that his answer would severely upset them both.

"Well, around the time that you and Neville were both born, things were bad. People were disappearing left and right like, and your mother and I, along with the Longbottoms, had narrowly escaped Voldemort on several occasions. Then in December, Regulus was murdered and well, and it was Frank who had been on call that night at the Ministry. I was stupid for doing it, but Sirius was so angry," his voice began to crack a slight bit and Harry was so sorry that he had ever brought the subject up, but his father regained his composure and went on.

"He blamed him for not watching the Apparition network better. In those days we kept tabs on certain people and while the tabs aren't always accurate, they are better than nothing. Well, Sirius got drunk and went to Frank's house and screamed at him to come out. He threatened to kill him if he didn't. It's really nothing against your godfather, you know that right?"

Harry nodded in reply, though he couldn't deny that he was sort of surprised. Sirius hated his brother.

"Well, a duel broke out between them and Frank was pretty badly injured. I was barely able to keep Frank from pressing charges. It was one of many times I saved your godfather from a pretty serious accusation I might add. And well, things were just never the same between Frank and I, and I myself was torn. Sirius is my best friend, we were thick as thieves we were. I imagine Frank assumed I would have taken his side so after that, we hardly talked. Rumors got spread around the Ministry, and before anyone knew it, you'd think that Frank wanted the both of us dead and vice-versa. Your mother sent them both an invitation to my Auror's graduation party without my knowing, trying to make peace: your mother did always and still does does that better than anyone," he said with a pained half-smile "and Frank and Alice accepted, but when they showed up at our doorstep in Godric's Hollow, I answered the door and didn't know what to say. They left and went home."

Harry sat there stunned. He could imagine the feeling that he would have if he had almost directly sent people he was close to, or even anyone at all to their deaths, for that was exactly what had happened to Cedric Diggory. He wondered how it weighed on Sirius' conscience.

"Of all the things that I have done in my lifetime, I will never regret anything as much as I do that. And I'm not sure how I can ever apologize to Neville or his grandmother for it."

"But I thought Sirius hated his brother," Harry mused.

"Well, I won't deny that the two of them really did hate each other when they were young. It got worse after Regulus first joined the Death Eaters. But he had a change of heart. The night before he was killed, he told Sirius, myself, and Dumbledore quite an interesting piece of information, and swore that he was willing to do whatever it took to make the things he had done right again."

"So Sirius was upset because he never got to mend fences with his brother?"

"Pretty much. Imagine how you might have felt."

"Do you know where they found his body?" Harry asked, wondering again about the disappearing room.

"Not much from the case was ever released," his father replied. "His parents were close to death and supported Voldemort, so they refused an investigation. Of course the murder had to happen three days before they finalized legislation stating that any murder or disappearance with a possibility of being related to Voldemort had to be investigated too. Sirius always did think it was a part of a huge conspiracy."

"I don't suppose you ever came here to visit him when you were at school, did you?"

"Ha!" James laughed. "Like Augusta Black would have one of the Potters roaming around her house. Your grandparents and I were from the side of the Potter family that Sirius' side of the Black family always wanted to forget about. Why do you ask?"

"Well, do you know where his room was?"

"He and Kreacher shared a wing of the house that was hidden from the main part. I think he told me one time that only the lost could find it."

Harry's heart skipped a beat. So he hadn't been crazy at all.

"Are you asking because you found it this summer?" James asked lazily.

"Yeah, how did you know?"

"You mother does tell me things you know."

"Well, did anyone find it again?"

"We did, but there was nothing out of the ordinary about it really."

It hardly made sense. The room had been so spotless while the others were covered in dust. James and Harry sat again in silence, but this time their comfort and happiness was mauled by the passage of the serious conversation they had just had. The rest of the day, Harry agonized over the outcome of Sirius' trial the next day and his father tried reassure him that there was really no proof, but Harry knew Fudge and the rest of the so-called Wizengamot didn't need proof, for if they didn't have any they were likely to just make it up, but after the conversation he and his father had just had, he decided it was better to not push bad emotions any harder.