"You're telling me that a bunch of jelly-obsessed quacks won't let me into the city?" I snapped.
"That's exactly what we're saying. Freak," spat the guard.
Soon after, the two guards were hanging from a tree, completely nude and covered in bruises. I grabbed a piece of paper from Leaf and a pen, and then wrote on it "Please keep looking at us until you decide to call the asylum". Then I pinned it to one's chest.
"Wow," said Leaf. "I have never seen so much brutality. Did those two really deserve that?"
"No, but it felt good," I told her. Then I walked back to the wall. I heard some scuffling behind me, and turned to see an empty tree and Leaf walking coolly towards me.
"I'm not going to respond. Now let's get into the city," I said.
Leaf said, "Hang on a minute." She walked over to a small little guard hut off to the side. I waited a moment, and then Leaf waltzed out, a clearly entranced security guard following her. Leaf motioned for me to get out of sight. I ducked behind a tree and watched her as she flirted with the guard, who pulled out a remote and pressed something on it. The walls separated. Leaf gave the man a peck on the cheek, and then roundhouse kicked him in the side of the head. He fell like a rock. I walked out of cover and admired the unconscious guard. "Nice."
Petalburg City itself was no better. Guards patrolled the streets. To avoid attention, Leaf and I split up. I curled into a Morph Ball and rolled around the city, searching for the Gym. I reached the Gym without attracting attention, though a few people did give minor glances at the rolling ball. I uncurled and dashed into the Gym.
"OMGWTFBBQ!" The next minute, I was flat on my back with a girl pummeling my chest. "You're the Kyurem Pokèmorph! I gotta take a picture! My friends will be all WTF and OMG! This is going on my wall for sure!" screeched the girl. I curled into a Morph Ball. The girl fell on her face and I rolled into the next room. Some Trainers were milling around in there. They didn't notice me, and I rolled into the next room. More Trainers milled around. A couple of them noticed me, at which point I stopped. The Trainers' attentions moved off, and I was about to make it to the next room when the fan girl from the first room ran in, screaming, "It's the Pokèmorph!" and pointing at me. One Trainer sent out a Breloom, which emitted a yellow powder. When the powder touched me, it forced me to uncurl. My limbs refused to move. The Trainers moved in, grinning. I struggled fiercely, but the Trainers just pulled out opened Pokèballs. I could see where this was going, and I didn't like it one bit. The first Trainer threw out his Pokèball. It hit me. Red light blinded me, and then there was darkness.
I realized that I was inside the Pokèball. Fiercely, I wriggled around. The ball couldn't take the stress and broke open. My paralysis gone, I glared at the Trainer. I stood up and stalked towards him. His grin quickly changed as he stumbled back in fear. The Trainer's Breloom leaped in front of him. I kicked it between its legs, and it keeled over. The Trainer returned his Pokèmon even as he moved back. Finally, his back hit the wall. He gained a look of absolute terror. I strode up until we were face to face. I glared at him, and stepped back. His face twisted in relief, and then it met my fist. The Trainer slumped down, his nose crooked and bloody. I gave his unconscious body one more glare. I spat on him and walked away. The Trainers gave me a wide berth to move towards the next door. When I passed through it, I found myself staring at a girl. She had red shoes and a red swimsuit-like thing with Pokèball decorations on. Beneath that were some small shorts. Around her waist was a green bag, and on her head was a green bandanna. She had on white gloves. We stared at each other, and then she charged at me. Surprised, I let her tackle me. She began taking pictures and ogling. I shoved her off.
"Where's the Gym Leader?" I asked her.
"You're looking at her," she answered.
"Well. This is awkward. Screw it. Let's battle," I decided.
The girl sent out a Vigoroth, which looked like an albino Earth simian. I chose Riolu for the fight. The Riolu and Vigoroth sized each other up. Quickly, we called out our commands, and the Pokèmon went at it. Riolu delivered a Brick Break (TM taught) to the top of the Vigoroth's skull, quickly putting it down. May then sent out a massive Snorlax, which sat there with its eyes closed. I had Riolu use a Force Palm on its gut. The Snorlax's eyes opened wide as it let out a low groan. Then it toppled backwards. May's eyes widened just as wide.
"Wow! You're some Trainer! Cute and an expert!" she gushed.
I sighed. "Let's just get this over with."
"Spoilsport," she huffed as she sent out a Herdier. The Herdier barked at Riolu, which growled in response. Riolu delivered a Brick Break to the charging Herdier, which instantly passed out and slid to Riolu's feet.
"That was over too fast for me. You really know what you're doing. Good luck, Pokèmorph. Doubt you'll need it, though. Here's your Badge," said May. She handed me the Badge, then stepped back. I walked right out without looking back.
"There's the Pokèmorph! Get it!" As soon as I was outside, my senses were assaulted by bursts of light and wailing sirens. "Pokèmorph!" called a voice. "You are under arrest for assault and battery!"
"Hey!" I retorted, shielding my eyes, "I punched one kid in the face one time. Since when was one punch assault and battery?"
"That punch could have killed him!" replied the voice.
"Oh, please!" I complained. I rolled into a Morph Ball and quickly rolled behind a tree. Then I uncurled and replied, "So he has a broken nose. He'll get over it. Now quit hounding me."
"Get it!" ordered the voice. A massive electrical pulse leaped at me. My vision blurred. When it cleared up, I was resting inside a cell with my hands, feet, and tail wrapped around my chest by a metal bar.
Huh. I always knew you would end up tied just before you were euthanized.
"Thanks for the concern, you prick," I growled.
Just hurry up and snap the ropes.
I curled into a Morph Ball. The bar fell away. I bounced over it and uncurled, surveying the cell. It was a cinderblock with a locked hatch. Luckily, there was a vent above it. I leaped up and knocked the vent cover off. With my next leap, I grabbed the edge of the vent and tried to hoist myself up. I did, but unintentionally curled into a Morph Ball, enabling me to fit inside the tiny shaft. I rolled through it. Once I reached another ventilation duct, I slammed into it repeatedly until it fell off. Then I rolled out and uncurled. A flabbergasted guard was standing next to me. His mouth opened and closed like a fish. I closed them by knocking him out with a well-placed punch. My next step was to leave. Quite luckily for me, a door was behind the guard. I pushed through it into the sun-lit Petalburg City.
I made for the Pokèmon Center, where I found Leaf and Tal (head-spikes and four noodle-arms) talking to each other and eating.
"Hey, Sam," greeted Leaf mildly. "What did you do, pull an Ocean's eleven?"
"What? Hey, Leaf. Hey, Tal. What've you guys been doing since I've been in jail?" I asked them pointedly.
They shrugged. "Going around, scoping the cute boys, messing with May, that kind of thing," munched Tal as she took a bite of a sandwich.
"You've been scoping boys. I've been checking out the news," put in Leaf as she slurped soup. "Listen to this. Petalburg, Rustboro, Dewford, Lilycove, and Sootopolis City are now Unitologist towns, as well as Fallarbor Town. Fortree, Mossdeep, Pacifidlog, Verdanturf, Lavaridge, Slateport, and Mauville have bounties on your heads. Only New Bark, Oldale, and Ever Grande are staying neutral.
"What. The. Hell," I muttered.
"It goes without saying you need to get the hell out of here," chirped Tal, munching on the same sandwich.
"See you at Fortree," chimed in Leaf. I growled. The two did not look in the least intimidated, only saying, "You really might want to jet."
I turned and walked out of the Center.
"Get it!" I saw a massive storm of Unitologists streaming at me, vicious Pokèmon at the ready and signs saying, "GO HOME" and "DIE, ARCHFIEND". I turned and ran back into the center, where more Unitologists surrounded me. I gave Leaf and Tal an angry look, and dashed to the stairs. I climbed up the roof, where I looked around. Unitologists were surrounding the Center. I could easily kill them all, but I didn't want be truthfully accused of evil. That would only make things that much harder for me. I scanned the area, my hopes dimming.
"Need a lift?" I looked up to see a boy in white clothes, and green hair sitting atop a massive black dragon, a blue-lined booster as its tail. I leaped onto the dragon, and it flew off. The city fell away behind us.
"Thanks for the save," I said. "What's your name?"
"My name is Natural Harmonia, but you can call me N," he stated. "And you're the Kyurem Pokèmorph?"
"Um," I hesitated, and then said, "Yeah."
"Tell me, what's it like, being a bridge between our world and theirs?"
"It's not exactly fun. Listen, where are we going?"
"Oldale Town. Why?"
"Thanks for the ride, but that's not where I'm going. I'll see you later."
"Huh?" asked N. "How are you going to-" I jumped off and began Screw Attacking before he could finish the sentence.
I Screw Attacked across Hoenn, searching for Fortree City. As luck would have it, I found Fortree just north of Mauville City. I landed just on the outskirts of town. Quickly, I tucked my tail into my jeans and tilted the cap that I had only recently discovered I was wearing down low to disguise my face. I walked into town and checked into the Pokèmon Center, keeping my face low. Despite this, I garnered a few looks, especially from a human and Alpacian sitting nearby.
I woke up the next morning to feel metal on my skin, instead of a soft bed.
What the?
You're inside an stratocraft cell. That Alpacian and the human transported you here in your sleep.
"And you didn't wake me because?" I hissed.
I didn't feel like it.
"One of these days I am going to slit my throat," I growled.
"Hey Houston, we have a problem," came the voice of an Alpacian.
"Was that a joke? 'Cause it sucked balls," snapped the human.
"Dammit, Armstrong, it wasn't a joke. The project woke up."
"I can see that, you moron. And don't call me Armstrong, Brannigan."
"Oh sure, Armstrong," came the Alpacian's mocking voice.
"Shut up, Big Time. You know what? The only 'big time' you've ever had is in the big house."
"Piss off, Armstrong. You're just a thieving quack," snorted the Alpacian.
"You better not have said that," said the human.
"Oh really? Face it, Armstrong. Everyone knows you ripped that armor off from Samus Aran. And every single one of your partners attests to you having stolen most, if not all, of the bounty after each mission."
"Oh really?" hissed the human. "Then tell me, Big Time, why did you team up with me?"
"Simple," sniffed the Alpacian. "You're about to get blown to hell." With that, I heard him press something. The human roared, "WHAT THE FU-" and then a massive explosion rocked the stratocraft. The Alpacian emitted a thin, reedy whine, which I recognized as a laugh. Then the laughing was cut off instantly, followed by a choking sound. "So, you bastard," came the voice of the human, "you were planning to blow me up, eh?"
While they had been arguing, I was considering my options, and was ready with one.
"He was," I replied, "but I'm going to do it."
"Eh?" said the human. I curled into a Morph Ball and dropped a bomb.
The effect was instantaneous. The stratocraft was annihilated. The Alpacian and human were partially vaporized. And I was falling at terminal velocity towards the Fortree City Gym. I aimed a rocket at it to open a hole for me. Then I curled into Morph Ball. Sadly, a bird hit me mid-fall, causing me to uncurl in surprise. I slammed into the ground of the Gym and moaned. A girl in white wearing something on her head leered at me curiously. "Are you all right?" she asked.
I groaned. "I just fell from twenty miles up without a parachute, and you're asking if I'm all right?"
"Well, if you're talking, you're evidently fine," she pointed out.
After a moment, I heard something crack. With a grunt, I got up. "I've had a lot of practice with this kind of thing," I said.
"Well. I'm amazed you survived the practice, then," she said.
"Yeah, I know," I said, checking my belt. "Let's battle!"
"Already?"
"I think you know that I'm on the run from Unitologists and bounty hunters. Let's get this show on the road."
"All right. But may I first have the pleasure of your name?" she asked.
"It's Sam. And yours?"
"Winona. Now let's do this!"
And so we battled. It was much more difficult than I expected. My Pokèmon did not have any clear advantages, and Riolu would be severely disadvantaged. Through sheer luck, at the end, when Winona's Altaria missed Metang, it delivered a Psychic that grounded it. Metang collapsed soon thereafter.
"Wow! What a show! I think you've got wings, baby! Here's your Feather Badge!" exclaimed Winona. She handed me the Badge.
"Thanks," I said, glancing at the exit. I turned back to Winona to find her tapping away at a phone. "Hey, what's up?" I asked.
"You're under arrest for vandalizing my Gym."
The entrance door flew in, and hordes of Unitologists stormed through, glaring at me.
I quickly jumped up and Screw Attacked off.
I made it to Lilycove City intact, but too exhausted to keep moving. I checked in at the Center, and managed to heal my Pokèmon and get some rest. The next morning, I was rudely awakened by a group of Trainers crowding my room. I grunted, and they took out Pokèballs.
Son of a bitch, I thought.
I know you are, but what am I?
Shut up, bitch.
I ran. The Trainers threw Pokèballs at me. I dodged. I made it to the beach, and dove in, jogging into a small reef. The water thwarted the Trainers for a brief moment, before they threw on swim clothes, re-breathers, and whale Pokèmon. I cursed, releasing bubbles, and went deeper. And deeper. And deeper. Finally, the Trainers gave up, after one of the rebreathers cracked, drowning the unlucky soul wearing it. I hung out in a tiny trench for a minute, before jogging out. As I did, I swore I could feel a giant eye watching me…
I dragged myself out of the water and lay gasping on the shores of Mossdeep City. I turned my head to see Leaf and Tal relaxing in chairs and bikinis. I groaned. "I…hate…you…"
"Oh, cheer up," bubbled Tal, walking over to me. "It's not every day you get to see hot chicks on the beach."
"Do… I… look… like… I…choke… care?" I coughed, water spraying out of my mouth.
"Gosh, what happened to you?" asked Leaf, examining me.
"I… had… to… fight… a… giant… blue… whale-fish…" I choked out.
"A Kyogre? Good god!" exclaimed Tal.
"Screw… it. Just… want… oxygen!" I wheezed.
Leaf and Tal helped me up. I collapsed into the chair, rasping and choking. After a few minutes, I was able to get out of the chair and stagger up the beach to the Pokèmon Center. I checked in, looking like a drowned rat, and lay on the bed, hoping for oxygen.
The next morning, I coughed up more water and began to train with Leaf and Tal. Leaf was using a new Pokèmon, a Luxray. We trained all morning and the afternoon. While we were training, a group of other Trainers gathered. When we looked at them, they pointed at me, and held up a WANTED poster with my face on it. "You want to fight?" I asked.
"We want to win. And get the bounty," they answered.
"All right. Let's do this," answered Leaf.
Leaf and I easily decimated the Trainers, their Pokèmon being no stronger than Level 20. We got a load of cash, and leveled up our Pokèmon.
With my strong Pokèmon, who were actually obeying me, I went to the Gym. Inside, I carved a swath of win while solving the puzzle of the teleportation units. Finally, I made it to Tate and Liza, the telepathic twins. They grinned. "We've been expecting you," the duo intoned.
"I would say 'stalkers', but I think you know better than that," I replied.
Tate and Liza released Lunatone and Solrock, two rock-like Pokémon that resembled Solaris and Lunar, Pocket's sun and moon. I sent out Deino and Metang. We battled each other fiercely. The telepathic twins were able to communicate mentally, giving them an advantage. At one point, though, when my tail was raised, I actually picked up on their mental communications. Without giving anything away, I managed to take the advantage. Tate and Liza's triumphant expressions slowly gave way to confusion as I trumped their Pokèmon. Solrock and Lunatone were quickly wiped out after that. With determined expressions on their faces, the dynamic duo sent out a Starmie and Chimeco. Their tactics were still ineffective, as I was able to pick up on their communications and effectively block and counter. When Espeon finally collapsed over Starmie's fallen body, Tate and Liza emitted simultaneous gasps. My Metang and Deino were still doing strong(except that Deino had a mark on its head from where it tried to bite Tate). "That was amazing! How did you know what we were going to do?" they voiced simultaneously. I raised my tail and thought, that's how. Tate and Liza raised their eyebrows in understanding. I gave them a nod and turned, walking away.
Outside, I met Leaf. She handed me a newspaper:
"POWERFUL POKèMORPH?"
Sam, the Pokèmorph who has been traveling Hoenn, is now famous for being able to defeat every Gym Leader he has faced on the first try, something currently held by only two other people, the trainer Red Ketchum and-" The second name was missing. Continuing, it read:
"We spoke to Roxanne Diamond, and she told us that he was very skilled in using type advantages. Brawly Kendo stated that the Pokèmorph's Pokèmon were at high levels. Callisto Sparx stated that his Pokèmon were very independent and skilled alone. May Birch stated that he was efficient at using powerful moves. And Winona Fluffington told us that he was very unorthodox in his tactics. As we speak, he was last seen swimming towards Mossdeep City. After taking more deliberations, a panel of scientists reached another conclusion: The Pokèmorph is a multi-fusion of Zekrom, possibly Rayquaza, and other, as-yet undecipherable Pokèmon."
I was impressed by myself, but knew that I had to get to the final Gym before the paparazzi reached Mossdeep. Leaf said, "Sootopolis City is south of here. Find the crater and swim under it. Hey, nice work. I'll see you in Sootopolis!"
I nodded and ran for the beach. Along the cliffside, I dove off and started running towards Sootopolis. I rested on the seabed, then started running. The Speed Booster kicked in, and I left a steam cloud that was extinguished by the weight of the water. Soon, the Sootopolis Crater came into view. I ran underneath it, carving into the rock. When I judged I had gone far enough, I crouched, and Shinesparked straight up. I smashed through rock and popped out on the other side, startling a group of people. At that point, I realized that I couldn't stop. I kept hurtling upwards. The sky grew darker, and my Combat Visor popped up, displaying an air gauge. Luckily, at that point, the Shinespark gave out. I flailed around in space, trying to force myself back down. A large green snake spiraled into view, and used its tail to slam me into the atmosphere. I angled myself carefully into Sootopolis. Just before hitting the surface, I fired at it to break it and soften the landing. I carved into the water and swam up to shore. I lay on the shoreline trying to catch my breath, when I noticed that a group of people had surrounded me, Pokèmon out, looking ready to eviscerate me. I sighed, and a Luxio took the opportunity to leap at my throat. I fought with it as it gnawed on my neck. I chopped it in the head and it fell down. I jumped up, feeling blood run down my throat. I wiped it away and licked it off, noting that it tasted like roasted picori. And that it was orange.
Oh, man. Vaati was such a prick.
The Unitologists gasped and began to send their Pokèmon at me again. I dodged a few and knocked others out before jumping into the water and swimming for the Gym.
Inside, I encountered more Unitologists. They leered at me and sent out their Pokèmon. Thankfully, they seemed content to let me battle one at a time. Without the advantage of numbers, I was able to chop down their numbers, but the number of my potions decreased as fast as theirs. By the time I had solved the ice puzzle for the final time, I was out of potions, forcing me to trek back out, fight my way through the mob of Unitologists, and threaten the salesclerk at the Pokèmart to sell me potions and freeze cures. Then it was another trek through the mob and a slog to solve the ice puzzle, which had changed since I last visited. After slipping, sliding, cursing, and making a last-minute jump off the cracking ice to the final stairwell, I reached the Gym Leader. I stared at him quizzically. Then I said what was on my mind: "What the hell are you wearing?"
My Pokèballs malfunctioned and released the Pokèmon. Riolu, Deino, Metang, and Pupitar stared at the guy.
What… the frack?
What the heck is that thing?
Is it a person?
Metrosexual hipster. Dresses like a flamboyantly gay man to separate himself from the rest of the male crowd.
Nice one, Metang.
Why, thank you.
"Uh, what do you mean?" asked the guy. My eyes started to water. He was wearing a hideous bikini that could barely hold a massive beer gut. I looked away, screeching, "Put some clothes on! God! My eyes!"
Think we can push him onto the ice?
He'll scare the females down below.
Sounds like a plan.
Metang is in.
Since when did you begin referring to yourself in the third person?
Hungry!
I knew your sudden intelligence wouldn't last.
I forced myself to look at the Gym Leader. "Man, I came here to battle, not deal with a cross dresser! Hurry up and put on some pants and a shirt!"
"Pssh! If you can't face the heat, don't touch the ice!" the Gym Leader scoffed.
"Heat? The only thing burning here is my eye!" I retorted. "But fine! Let's do this!"
"Ref!"
On cue, a referee in swim trunks trudged up the stairs. He looked simultaneously embarrassed and freezing. No wonder, considering the trunks featured superheroes. Only the Gym Leader seemed like he wanted to be here.
"O-O-key, um, today the Gym Leader Wallace Titanic will face the Pokèmorph Sam. The Gym Leader will use three Pokèmon, while the challenger can use all of his. The battle is over when one side's Pokèmon are unconscious. Now, can we please begin the battle? My children are watching on TV!" begged the referee.
We began to battle. I quickly decimated his Frillish with Deino, but his Gyarados put up a serious fight, KOing Pupitar(of course, in retrospect, Pupitar was a bad choice). Surprisingly, Riolu put the beat-down on it, and then Wallace's Milotic put the beat-down on it. Now it was Metang and Milotic. Milotic used a Hydro Pump that slammed Metang backwards. Metang retaliated with a Psychic that sent Milotic for a loop. Neither Pokèmon was ready to back down.
"Metang, Agility!" I commanded. Metang psychically raised its Speed. Milotic's next Hydro Pump was easily dodged, and Metang used another Agility. At this point, it was practically vibrating. Metang delivered a solid Bullet Punch, which magnified by Agility, sank right into Milotic's skull. Milotic crooned in agony, and I grinned darkly. Then Milotic unleashed a Hydro Pump right into Metang's face. It spun around, quite evidently dazed. Two shots of water at a psi over 9000 each could not be good for anything except a whale. And that showed in Metang. Its speed gave out, and it could do nothing except take the constant slams of water from Milotic. I clenched my teeth, unable to even use a Potion while Milotic was drowning the field- and Metang. Luckily, at that moment, Metang began to glow. Milotic drew back to reveal a very angry looking Metagross. The Metagross then proceeded to lunge at Milotic, Agility in effect, and use a very powerful Hammer Arm on its head. An audible crack echoed through the Gym. I winced, knowing that Milotic would have to go to the Pokèmon Center. Milotic's eyes rolled up into its head, and it collapsed, clearly unconscious.
Wallace dashed up to it and quickly returned it. Then he reached for his neck. And pulled. A zipper came away, and with it, the bikini AND beer gut. Before me stood a man-clearly a man- wearing white pants, a shirt, and a white turban. He strode up to me and shook my hand. "Well played! Most Trainers ran away when they saw my costume. And all but two of the ones who didn't were to busy gaping at my disguise than at the battle. You are one of those two, and you clearly deserve this Waterfall Badge. Take it, and know that you are ready to face the Elite Four, beyond Ever Grande City. I know you and your Pokèmon will be more than ready to face them and win. But watch for the Champion- she's a crafty one."
"Uh, thanks," I said, slightly wierded out.
Wallace pulled out an X-Transceiver and began to talk on it. "Hm? Oh, yes… here. See you." Then he turned to me. "You might want to hit the road. Sootopolis is a Unitologist town, and I had to tell them where you are. On the bright side, very few Sootopolites have Water Pokèmon, so it'll take them some time to swim here. Good luck!"
I groaned, and dashed down the stairs, over the ice, and out the door. Into a mob of Unitologists. "Oh, crap."
I bulled through the horde, getting bitten, burned, bruised, and possibly poisoned by their Pokèmon. Yes, poisoned. I forced myself off the island and sank into the bottom of the bay. Every step I took was like getting stung by a War Wasp. I forced myself into a jog directed to the island of Ever Grande. Along the way, the Speed Booster kicked in. I Shinesparked straight across the sea, leaving a massive spray like a meteor's. My Shinespark was stopped abruptly when I rammed into a Wailord…
"SONOFABITCH!" I screamed as the surprisingly agile, angry Wailord threw me into the air with a Water Spout, and then leaped out and flipped, its tail slamming into me and smacking me straight at Ever Grande City even faster than a Shinespark. I arced downwards at a very sharp-looking rock. By sheer luck, I slammed slightly below the point, and rolled down all the way to come to a stop in front of the Pokèmon Center. I dusted myself off and walked in.
"Oh my goodness!" exclaimed the nurse. She gasped, "Look at you!"
I was about to make a snappy retort when she continued, "You are a mass of welts and blood!" I looked down at myself and was surprised to see my clothes stained in red. Against my protests, the nurse forced me onto a bed, and began to spray me down with potions and Full Heals. Eventually, I managed to get off, thank her, show my badges to the bouncers waiting outside the doors, and enter Victory Road.
Inside, it was a maze. I fought dozens of Trainers, and smashed multiple rocks, trying to solve the labyrinth. Several times, I had to return outside to heal my Pokèmon. On the bright side, Deino evolved into Zweilous, and Riolu was happy enough to evolve into a Lucario. I was pleased and surprised to discover that they were constantly obeying me. Upon further investigation, I learned that my possession of all the Badges told them that I was a dependable Trainer. With their newfound respect and obedience, we easily trumped every Trainer inside Victory Road. Eventually, we found our way out of the Road, and viewed the Pokèmon League building with some trepidation. I recalled my Pokèmon and walked in, healing them while buying a LOT of Full Restores, Hyper Potions, and Full Heals. When that was done, I released my Pokèmon one last time. Lucario, Zweilous, Metagross, and Pupitar looked at me.
"All right guys. We're finally here. It took a lot of work, but you made it. I owe a lot to you-especially my life- and it's been an enlightening-and fun-experience working with you. Now let's go!"
I flashed my Gym Badges, and we strode in. A four-story staircase awaited, and we proudly strode up the stairs. At the end, we found our first Elite Four member: Aaron. He introduced himself, "Well. So you're the Pokèmorph everyone's been talking about. I hear you have an undefeated streak? Well, let's see how that holds up against the fury of my beautiful Bug-type Pokèmon!"
My streak held up pretty well. Despite his bragging, his weak Bug-types were easily slaughtered, being at least five levels below mine.
"Well," said Aaron, abashed. "That was incredible. This is the kind of battling I left Sinnoh for. Keep going. Your heart is pure. That is what a Trainer needs."
I nodded briefly, healed my Pokèmon, and we strode past him into the next room. A young girl was waiting there. She bubbled, "Hi! I'm Galina! I'm new, so humor me. Actually, don't! My Psychic Pokemon and I can handle anything you throw at us! Let's start!"
She was blown away too. Zweilous and Metagross made sure of that.
"Wow! Your bond with your Pokèmon is tighter than anything I've ever seen! You'll go far for sure!" bubbled Galina. I nodded again, healed my Pokèmon, and went through to the next Gym Leader.
"Crytik?" I gasped. The Phrygisian turned. "Sam! It's great to see you!"
"How've you been?" I asked as we shook limbs.
"Pretty well. Callisto and I ended up here together. She went on to become a Gym Leader. Something about turning her opponents on with her electric passion, though I think there was a double meaning in there or something. I'm now the third Elite Four member. So what's been going on with you, eh? Nice look."
"Long story short: The Unitologists want to kill me, and I'm supposedly some prophesized hero or that bullshit. You know, the usual. Now let's get this party started!"
The party, sadly, ended very quickly. For Crytik. While Metagross was KOed, Lucario, Zweilous, and my new Tyranitar more than managed to trump his Froslass, Lapras, two Glalies, and Walrein.
"Wow," said Crytik when our battle was finished. "Man, you rock at this! How long have you been a trainer?"
"About two weeks," I answered.
"That is seriously hardcore. I can tell that you know how to use type advantages and combos. But that might not be enough for the Champion. But you know what? I have no doubt that you're going to win! Good luck, man. When you're the Champion, call me. We'll head to a cafe and catch up with each other. See you around."
"That sounds good. Bye, Crytik," I called over my shoulder, heading up the stairs. Midway up, I paused to heal my Pokèmon. Then I entered the next room. A man with orange hair and a cape was waiting for me. Without a word, he sent out his Pokèmon and we began the battle.
The final member of the Elite Four was a Dragon-type user. This made it more difficult for me to win, but thanks to the combined effort of all my Pokèmon, his Dragonairs, Garchomp, Salamence, and Druddigon eventually collapsed, though not without severely draining my Pokèmon.
"… Well done. You are ready to face the Champion," stated the strange member. "Your Pokèmon respect, love, and know you well. You have evidently been through much, including rebellion. Your patience has served you well. Now go. The Champion is waiting for you."
I gave him one last look before beginning the trek up to the Champion's room. Just before entering, I had one last talk with my Pokèmon:
"This is it, guys. You've done a great job this far. Are we going to lose after all of our effort?"
Seriously? A pep talk?
That was unnecessary.
You really didn't think we were going to try our best?
Someone still has flashbacks.
Get a grip. We all know this battle is going down in history:
We're going to become undefeated Champions!
"Let's do this," I muttered, and stepped through the doorway into a large circular room.
"Hey, Sam. I knew you would make it this far," said Tal. Her head was spiked, and her four arms were noodles.
"Tal? You're the Champion?" I exclaimed.
"The second undefeated Champion, right after Red Ketchum," she boasted.
"I'm really amazed, you know," she continued. "You've had an undefeated streak all the way to the top. I've been the Champion for five years, ever since the Deoxys incident, but I have a feeling that's going to change. Tomorrow's going to be the sixth year in a row. At that point, I'll have broken my own record. Again! But that's beside the point. I think you know what we're going to do?"
"Yeah. Let's do this!" I exclaimed.
"Go, Swampert!" Tal exclaimed. The Swampert roared loudly. I grinned. "Bad move, Tal! Go, Lucario!"
Lucario emerged and simply glared at Swampert, a steely gaze in its eye.
Tal flicked her head, and the Swampert immediately stomped around on the floor. The room shook, as cracks and pillars of rock began to spread from the earthquake, targeting Lucario.
"Dodge and use Close Combat!" I ordered. Lucario leapt up and began pushing off the pillars of rock to avoid touching the ground. It hurtled off one and came down on Swampert with an arm raised high. Tal tapped her foot, and a protective field, which Lucario bounced off of, surrounded the Swampert. Immediately, it faded. Lucario lunged, and before the Swampert could react, delivered a flurry of blows to it. The Swampert absorbed the blows, and then it was suddenly riding a wave of muddy water. As Lucario was washed away, I noticed Tal scratching her ear. Lucario was sent to the other edge of the arena, but it seemed okay. Lucario was then delivering another Close Combat when Tal threw a Full Restore at the Swampert. It broke over the Swampert, revitalizing it, just as Lucario struck. This time, the strikes were critical, and the Swampert collapsed despite the Full Restore. Tal returned it silently and sent out a Machamp. Lucario and Machamp faced off.
"Calm Mind!" I called. Lucario began to meditate, while the Machamp scrunched up its face and delivered a quite startling zombie expression. I jumped back, but Lucario, with its eyes closed, did not notice the Scary Face. I called, "Lucario, Aura Sphere!" In one fluid movement, Lucario stood up, opened its eyes, and sent an Aura Sphere hurtling at the Machamp, which was getting its face to normal proportions. It smacked into Machamp and sent it spinning. The Machamp angrily dashed in and in the blink of an eye, delivered two powerful chops to Lucario. The chops sent it flying, and it slumped against the wall. Undaunted, Lucario got back up, angering the Machamp. To both Tal's surprise, and mine the two lunged and simply began brawling. No moves were used, only punches, kicks and speed. In the end, Machamp got a dual hold on Lucario and applied pressure to its neck. Lucario visibly slumped, and I gasped. Machamp released it, and I ran over to check it. Thankfully, it was just unconscious. I returned it and sent out Metagross.
"Psychic!" I ordered. Metagross narrowed its eyes, and Machamp began to clutch its head. It ran around wildly, slamming into walls, until it finally slammed itself over the head and was knocked out. Tal then released Torterra.
"Hammer Arm!" I ordered. Metagross slammed an arm into Torterra's shell with a powerful crash. Torterra was forced to the ground, and it slowly got back up. Tal tapped her feet, and Metagross released a flurry of green particles, which were absorbed by Torterra. Metagross looked drained, while Torterra looked slightly replenished.
"Hammer Arm!" I called again. Metagross once more slammed an arm down on Torterra's back. Tal tapped her feet, and once again Torterra absorbed Metagross' energy. "Hammer Arm!" I called for the last time. Torterra was slammed into the ground and didn't move again.
"Go, Emboar!" called Tal. The luchador pig leered at Metagross. Metagross leered back. Then it was drenched in flames emitting from Emboar's mouth. I could literally hear metal melting. When Emboar halted its assault, Metagross slumped and then collapsed, steaming. I used a Burn Heal on it and returned it to my Pokèball.
"Go, Tyranitar!" I ordered. Tyranitar appeared and roared at Emboar, who visibly cringed.
"Earthquake!" I commanded. Tyranitar stomped the ground ferociously. Emboar was jolted around and pelted by stray rocks. Then a massive pillar of rock grew to the ceiling, crushing Emboar between it and the ceiling. Emboar fell out, alive but unconscious.
Tal then sent out a strange, cyborg-like bug. It was purple and had a massive cannon on its back.
"It's been a while since I had to use you, eh?" she said to the cyborg. It made a beeping sound in response. "Yes, I know you were bored, but sending you out would make the battle much less interesting. Besides, now you've got a Tyranitar to take out!"
The bug buzzed and ran to meet Tyranitar, which leered at it.
"Run program D0use!" called Tal. The bug inserted a blue disk into a slot on its cannon, and then a gush of water spurted out. Tyranitar was slammed by the water, and appeared visibly weaker. It roared and used Earthquake, which the bug easily dodged. The cyborg then fired another gush of water, weakening Tyranitar further. Without any commands, it performed a critical Stone Edge, which noticeably depleted the cyborg's health. The bug fired one final gush, knocking out Tyranitar.
"Go, Zweilous!" I called out. The dragon Pokèmon appeared, eyeing the bug hungrily.
"Use Dragon Pulse!" I called. Zweilous fired a powerful beam at the cyborg, which weakened it.
Tal called, "Run program Fr33ze!"
The bug loaded a second, pale white disk into its cannon, and a bolt of ice struck Zweilous, which roared in pain and anger. Then it began to glow. I pumped my fist as Zweilous grew into a hulking dragon: Hydreigon.
I had another trick up my sleeve. "Use Flamethrower!" I hurled the TM disk at Hydreigon, which absorbed the data before the disk bounced back. Then it released a gush of flames, which encased the bug. I heard beeps, buzzes, and an electronic screech. When the flames receded, the bug collapsed.
"Genesect!" screamed Tal.
"I'm amazed, Sam! You're the first challenger who's ever made it past Genesect! But this battle isn't over yet! Go, Aggron!" she yelled. The Aggron roared a challenge, and Hydreigon responded in kind.
"Flamethrower!" I called.
"Autotomize!" called Tal. Hydreigon launched a bolt of flame at Aggron, which nimbly dodged.
"Grab it and use Flamethrower!" I bellowed. Hydreigon roared, and dived at Aggron. It correctly anticipated its movements, and grabbed it, hoisting it into the air before using a Flamethrower on Aggron's head. Aggron bellowed in pain, and Hydreigon dropped it. The weakened Aggron bellowed one last time before Hydreigon performed a Dragon Rush on it.
THOOM! The Aggron collapsed. Tal returned it with blank look on her face. Then it changed to amazement and joy. She ran up and hugged me.
"Wow. Just, wow. You did it, Sam! You've become the Pokèmon League Champion! I knew when you first showed up with those Pokèmon that my reign was up. You skillfully parried my attacks, used awesome tactics, and you and your Pokèmon successfully became the Champions!"
Tal then said, more calmly, "Head on to the next room."
Behind her, a door opened. I headed through to find myself in some kind of hall of fame.
"Hey, Sam," greeted Leaf. She was sitting in a chair by a machine. I walked up to her and asked, "What're you doing here?"
"I was the Champion before Tal. So when she asked me to come over and enter you in, I couldn't say no. This machine here," said Leaf, motioning to the cylindrical contraption, "will both heal your Pokèmon and record your new status as the Pokèmon League Champion. So let's do it."
I entered the data and watched as my picture, as well as my Pokémon's, appeared on a digital frame off to the side. Suddenly, everything started to break apart and turn white. "What the-" I began, and found myself facing Arceus.
So, you have become the Champion. Your companion Zoe is entering her Champion data as we speak. You have completed my challenge, so we Legendary Pokèmon shall help you in your quest.
"What about Leaf and Tal? They saw me disappear in a blaze of light!" I exclaimed.
I shall speak to them, so that they know you are all right. Now, do you wish to keep your Pokèmon?
"No," I answered. "They didn't particularly want to join me on my quest. Besides, I think they'll do just fine in the wild."
Very well. I will now transport you to your original destination.
"Huh?" was all I could say before my vision blurred. Then when it settled, I found myself standing in a cavern, Agent Z by my side, and facing an army of Krikens, all staring at us before they charged.
Next time: In a Hunger Games tribute, Sam and Agent Z are forced to compete in a massive deathmatch for the Krikens' entertainment.
Another two-week wait. Sorry guys. I had a lot to do. Anyways, I'm impressed by how many stories are being frequently updated.
PownzerX: Which 'Tales' game do you want me to do? I have no time to choose for myself.
Nice catch with the TV reference. But that's not the only reference I have...
And yeah, I read some of the Pokèmorph fanfics, and thought that the idea fit in well with the future concept of the story.
Brennan4: Thanks, man! But I really don't know how to do that style myself! When my next story rolls around, think I can keep it?
To all: How do you feel about fetch quests, Code Lyoko, Jurassic Park, and Daniel X?
I'm always accepting OCs. Just send in a description via review or PM(their name, species, powers, personality)!
I'm also accepting crossover ideas. Send one in via review or PM!
Read and review, folks. We're shooting for the Answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything!
What is it? 42.
Why is it 42? (well, we really don't know. We're trying to find the actual Question, first)42!
Why do I keep saying 42? 42!
Do you want me to shut the hell up? 42!
ARandomDay out. Peace!