Rating: NC-17
Pairings: Dean/Castiel
Warnings: Swearing and sexual content (for this part).
Author's Notes: This is unbeta'd so all mistakes are entirely my own. Sorry for the horribly long wait. I hope this chapter makes up for it! Thanks for being so patient. Enjoy!

Dean spent the first week of the new year juggling his time between checking up on Sam who had just been released from hospital, and meeting up with Castiel secretly. Jess was a huge help with Sam. She'd come over, make him soup and finish up homework with him. Dean was so grateful for her help and he could see just how happy she made his little brother. He really hoped things worked out for them.

He would meet up with Castiel as much as he could. They even went on a few dates. They always had to meet up outside of town though. Dean really didn't want anyone from school to spot them and he'd do anything to hide this ... thing he had with Cas.

They'd go to the cinema to watch a movie and hangout afterwards at the town's arcade before heading back to the Impala to maybe steam up the windows from the backseat for a few hours.

It wasn't just all sex though. Sometimes they'd curl up in each other's arms and talk. Dean found himself opening up for the first time about his mother's death. He hadn't spoken to anyone else about his feelings in this much depth. Not even to Sammy.

Cas would talk about his mom too. About how much he missed her and wished he had just one more day with her. Dean asked about his dad and Castiel told him that he never knew his dad. That he'd ran off after he found out that Rachel was pregnant. He guessed that Castiel had a much worse life than he did. At least he had a dad. Even if he was an alcoholic half of the time.

The day before the next semester began at school, Castiel invited Dean over for dinner. Dean thought that he just meant 'dinner' as in, 'pizza and a quick blowjob'. Turned out, Castiel meant way more than that.

Missouri was the one who answered the door when Dean arrived. His eyebrows furrowed, but he let her manhandle him inside and greet him with a huge, motherly hug. She looked like she'd been cooking for hours. That probably was correct to assume though, because when she led Dean into the dining room, he'd never seen so much food except for at Christmas time. She'd made a full roast dinner.

Everyone was sat around the table. Anna and Gabriel were sat beside each other whilst Michael sat at one end of the table. There was an empty chair at the other end and Castiel was sitting opposite Gabriel with an empty chair beside him, obviously reserved for Dean.

Dean swallowed thickly. Fuck. It looked like a 'meet the family' lunch. He did not sign up for this shit. Regardless, he took his seat without a word opposite Anna and shot Cas a look, earning him a sheepish smile.

Michael looked annoyed that Dean was even here and it made him feel majorly uncomfortable.

"Eat up, sweetie," Missouri said, taking her seat as everyone around the table began reaching for food. "There's plenty for everyone."

Dean forced a weak smile and chuckled nervously before reaching over to place some roast chicken on the plate in front of him.

Just as Missouri sat down, there was a loud farting sound coming from her direction. Everyone glanced at her before looking to Gabriel who was holding his breath, trying hard not to laugh. Missouri rolled her eyes and threw the whoopee cushion away from where she'd tugged it out from underneath her.

"Really, Gabriel?" Anna sighed, chewing on her first mouthful of food.

Gabriel threw his arms up and let out an exasperated breath. "Doesn't anyone in this household know how to have a little fun?" he asked, but everyone just continued eating, ignoring him.

Dean was sat there nervously, keeping his eyes on the food on his plate as he ate. The food was delicious, but Dean was just too preoccupied to enjoy it properly.

"So, Dean," Michael began around a mouthful of food before swallowing it and clearing his throat. "You go to high school with James?"

Having the attention of everyone at the table suddenly focused on him alone was slightly unnerving for Dean. He forced a polite smile and nodded. "Yeah. We're in the same English class," he elaborated.

"And he's in my Science class," Anna added, obviously trying to take the pressure off Dean a little. Which he was entirely thankful for, shooting her a grateful smile.

"Do you have a part-time job of any sort?" he asked and Dean watched as Michael exchanged a look with Castiel who glared at him before focusing on his food again. It was a strange look. One that was a half-smug, almost fatherly look.

"Uh, yes," Dean answered, taking a sip of the glass of water in front of him. He found himself suddenly grateful for it since his throat had seemed to dry up under the intense scrutiny of Michael's fixed stare. "I work weekends at the garage- Singer's Salvage Yard."

Michael raised an eyebrow, but didn't look overly impressed. "Oh, a mechanic? How very ..." Michael looked to the ceiling, as if searching for the right word to use. When he found it, he returned his gaze to Dean with a slight smirk before saying, "low-class."

Missouri sighed loudly and gave Michael a stern look. Dean's eyebrows must've shot up towards his hairline as he clenched his fist where it was hidden below the table. Gabriel was sat with his hand over his mouth, trying hard not to laugh. Yeah, if Michael had said that to anyone else, Dean would've probably laughed too. But he'd said it to him. If the smug bastard wasn't Castiel's brother, Dean would've stood up and punched him right then and there. But since he was, he decided to try and keep his cool.

"Dessert!" Missouri chirped in a cheerful voice, clearly trying to relieve some of the tension in the room as she rose from her chair with a smile. "I hope you like apple pie, Dean."

Dean? Like apple pie? Wow, understatement of the century right there. "I love it," he replied, now with a huge grin across his face.

"Good. Then you can help me serve it," Missouri suggested, gathering everyone's empty plates. Dean glanced at Castiel slightly who stood up to begin helping Missouri. She just batted his hand away and told him to sit down again. "I'm sure a strong boy like Dean can help out. You just sit right there, sweetie."

Dean just about caught sight of Michael rolling his eyes as he gulped down the rest of his wine. After getting to his feet and taking a pile of empty plates into his arms, Dean made his way straight towards the kitchen. When he got there, he set the dishes down beside the sink and internally congratulated himself on not dropping them. That would've been so humiliating. Especially in front of Michael.

Missouri joined him a few moments later and smiled politely at him as the door closed behind her. Dean didn't really know how to act around his (kinda) boyfriend's step-mom. He just decided to stay silent as he watched her slice the apple pie and place a slice on every clean plate.

"I was gonna bake this one, but Castiel insisted on baking it himself," she chuckled, scooping some ice-cream onto each plate carefully. Now Dean realized that this was all planned. Why hadn't Cas just asked him? He tricked him. He tricked him into an awkward family dinner. Son of a bitch.

"I'm sure it'll taste great either way," he said, turning on the charm with a sparkling grin.

Missouri had just finished serving the pie when she wiped her hands on her apron and turned to face Dean with a concerned look on her face. "So, who are you hiding from, hon?"

Her question had taken him completely by surprise that he had to do a literal double-take. His mouth hung open for a while before he shook his head in confusion. "I- sorry, what?" he stuttered.

"I can tell you feel the need to hide whatever you have with Castiel." Dean flinched a little at that. Having other people talk about it was strange and so foreign to Dean. Somehow, he didn't feel threatened though. "Whoever you're hiding from, it isn't worth it. Whether it's your parents, your friends, or even yourself. You need to put your happiness first."

Dean was speechless. It had been so long- actually, no one had ever spoken to Dean like that … except for his mother of course. Like his thoughts and his happiness actually mattered. For so long, he'd been doing everything to make everyone else happy. Maybe ... just maybe, Missouri was right.

"I haven't seen Castiel this happy in ... years and it's all thanks to you," Missouri said and Dean could swear he noticed tears welling in her eyes. "Let him make you happy in return, Dean. I can see just how much you both care about each other. Let it happen. It's okay. It's natural. Love is normal, no matter what form it's in."

That was it though. This didn't feel normal. Liking a dude just wasn't something that Dean thought he'd ever feel. It felt disgusting and wrong and just far from normal. But talking to Missouri like this made him feel like it might just be okay.

Dean helped take the plates of pie into the dining room and he grinned over at Cas who just smiled back at him proudly, shaking his head. He set the plates down on the table before taking his seat beside Cas again, feeling a hand rest on his thigh almost immediately.

"I hope she didn't grill you too much," he whispered with a chuckle.

"Nah, I'm awesome. I think she likes me," Dean retorted with a charming grin. Cas just rolled his eyes and pushed him away playfully before digging into the apple pie.

When Dean tasted the delicious pie himself, he let out a pleased hum around his fork. The look of pride in Cas' face when he did filled Dean's stomach with butterflies as his heart skipped a beat. "I didn't know you could bake, Cas," Dean said after swallowing his first bite, gazing at Castiel with curious eyes.

Castiel shrugged a little, a slight blush creeping onto his cheeks as he chewed on his first bite.

Michael sneered a little at the other end of the table before saying, "Oh, there's probably a lot you don't know about our little Jimmy."

Dean's brow furrowed in confusion and he watched Castiel's face flicker with too many emotions for him to even register. "You know I don't like you calling me that," Castiel muttered, eyes fixed on the table.

"Michael, behave yourself, boy," Missouri warned, giving him a look that, if looks could kill, Michael would be stone dead right now.

The rest of the meal went by without any major incidents. Afterwards, Dean offered to help Anna with the dishes. Maybe it was to get away from Michael and his judgemental comments and glares.

As they washed up, Anna talked on and on about school and Jo and other things that Dean didn't really care about. So, he just zoned in and out until Castiel's name was mentioned. "Whatever's going on between you two, just don't worry, I won't tell anyone," she said with a sincere smile.

Dean swallowed and nodded, deciding to just continue on with the dishes. He didn't really want to have to explain himself to Anna of all people.

Being back at school after having almost two weeks off for the holidays definitely took its toll on Dean. He had never consumed as much coffee in his life as he did in the first week back at school. He managed to keep up with classes and homework pretty well. All whilst meeting Cas in secret both inside and out of school hours.

Football practice resumed that Friday and Dean really worked on pushing himself. Sometimes he'd see Castiel hiding up in the bleachers, watching him closely with a smile on his face. That proved to be a big inspiration for Dean and he found himself doing better and better in each training session.

He also began running every morning before school. It was nice to just get out and clear his head as the sun began to rise and the birds chirped above him. It helped when he was angry about things like his dad slowly slipping back into his old habits again or his little brother being a dick about 'where were you last night?' 'I know you stayed at someone's house last night' and 'is it a girl? Why won't you tell me, Dean?'

It really pissed him off that his brother was acting as if he was Sherlock fucking Holmes. Dean didn't want Sam to know he was seeing Castiel for two reasons. The first was that he knew that if Sam found out, it would only be a matter of time before his dad found out. That would be absolutely catastrophic. Secondly, he didn't want his little brother to think of him as 'Dean the gay'. He wanted to be someone that Sammy was proud of. Not just the black sheep freak of the family.

Valentine's day. Dean never really liked the whole fuss about Valentine's day. He didn't even know why he was all dressed up with a wrapped present in his hand and standing at Castiel's front door in the freezing cold February night's weather. But he was. And he looked like an idiot.

When Castiel opened the door, Dean's eyes widened before they checked him out slowly. He was wearing one of Dean's band shirts and a pair of tight black boxers. His hair was mussed and he was checking Dean out too. Suddenly, he felt a little over-dressed in his white shirt, suit jacket and jeans.

He let out a soft noise when Castiel pulled him in, closing the door behind him before pinning him up against it and leaning in to kiss him breathless. Dean almost immediately dropped the present to the floor - it wasn't fragile anyway - and wrapped his arms around Cas' waist, pulling him flush against him.

When Cas' tongue probed at the seam of Dean's lips, he instantly opened up for him with a soft moan. Well, this wasn't exactly what he was expecting when Castiel invited him over for a Valentine's dinner but he could definitely work with this.

After their tongues explored each other's mouths and their hands slipped and slid over the curve of eachother's bodies, Castiel pulled away for air, breathing heavily against Dean's lips. "Happy Valentine's day," he whispered seductively, gazing into Dean's eyes with such intensity that it sent sparks of arousal racing to his groin.

"You too," Dean breathed, licking his lips.

Castiel chuckled before stepping away and taking Dean's hand, leading him to the kitchen. The only lighting in there was candlelight which cast a soft glow on Castiel's face, making him look almost angelic. He handed Dean a beer before taking a sip from a large glass of red wine.

Dean happily gulped down his first beer as they headed to the living room to curl up on the couch together and watch some romantic movie that Dean wasn't really paying any attention to since they were both too busy making-out.

Soon, Dean lost count of the amount of beer he'd consumed. He was pretty sure Castiel was on the same boat because they were stumbling up the stairs together in the dark, giggling like children as they tripped and held on to each other's torsos.

When they got to Castiel's room, they tumbled down onto his bed in a tangle of limbs as they moaned and panted, unable to keep their hands (or lips) off each other. It was dark, and all Dean could feel was Castiel. All he could hear and smell and taste was all just Cas. His Cas.

Clothes were discarded and Castiel had somehow managed to roll them over so that he was on top, kissing down Dean's neck. Their cocks slid against each other perfectly thanks to their precome. Dean's hips kept on thrusting upwards, making Cas growl as he pinned down Dean's wrists above his head.

It was that moment that Dean realized. He was a bottom. He was a total and utter sub. The worst thing about it was, Dean actually liked the idea.

"D-Dean," Cas gasped out, hips grinding down hard. "Fuck. Want you."

"Mmh, want you too," Dean replied immediately, tilting his head back to give Cas complete access to his neck. "Please. Fuck me."

He couldn't believe those words actually came from his mouth. More importantly, he couldn't believe how much he actually wanted it. God.

Castiel stopped all his movements, breath hitching slightly right beside Dean's ear. "You sure?" he asked through the darkness and Dean could feel Castiel's rock-hard cock twitching at the thought where it was trapped between their bodies.

Dean nodded, humming in affirmation before pushing his hips up in an attempt to show Castiel just how damn desperate he was for this. "Y-Yes. Want you inside me. Please?" Cas didn't reply verbally. He just reached over to his nightstand and pulled a small bottle of lube out from the first drawer.

Several moments later, Dean was breathing harshly as two of Cas' fingers were working him open slowly as Castiel's lips kissed gently at his shoulder. The stretch burned a little and through the drunken haze of want and lust, Dean wondered briefly how the hell he was going to take Castiel's cock which was way thicker than his fingers.

He felt a third one push in and groaned quietly. This didn't feel as good as he'd thought it would. In fact, it felt pretty painful and uncomfortable at the moment. Dean closed his eyes and gritted his teeth, hoping that it would get better once Cas was actually inside him.

"Just ... fuck me already," Dean choked out. He then watched as Castiel pulled away and slipped a condom onto his cock before slicking it up with some lube.

He looked so hot like this. Even though Dean's vision was swimming slightly, he could still tell how gorgeous Castiel looked. He still had his band shirt on too which made the whole thing even more arousing.

When Castiel pushed into him slowly, he choked back a pained groan, eyes screwed shut again. Fuck. Yeah, he was right. This hurt like a bitch. "Cas, fuck-" he groaned, clawing at his shoulders.

The burn was still there long after Dean managed to relax himself around Cas' length. Though he was glad that Cas wasn't pushy. He threaded his fingers through his hair and whispered soothingly into his ear which all helped Dean stay relaxed and calm.

Once he began to move, Dean tried to ignore the slight pain and focus on the pleasure. And there was definitely pleasure. With every thrust, Dean moaned out loudly. His whole body was thrumming from a mixture of alcohol and arousal. Dean couldn't hold back the noises escaping from his throat.

"Wanted you ... f-for so long," Cas groaned right into Dean's ear, fucking into him a little harder causing Dean's nails to dig into his shoulder blades.

Dean just whimpered in response, unable to string together a coherent sentence anymore. He was just too far gone right now. His cock was dragging deliciously against Cas' stomach as they moved together, Dean clinging onto Cas as if his life depended on it.

When he felt Castiel hit his prostate, his back arched perfectly and he cried out loudly. It only took a few more sharp hits for Dean to tense up and cry out Cas' name loudly as he spilled between their bodies, shuddering underneath him as his vision went white and pleasure coursed through his entire body.

He could feel Cas pistoning in and out of him at an erratic place for a few more minutes. Dean was still coming down from his high when he felt tremble as he came. He had just about recovered from his orgasm when he heard those three words being gasped out into his ear, "I love you."

Nausea churned in his stomach as Castiel rolled off him, panting heavily. But Dean felt like the whole world had just stopped. This was the moment he had never wanted to ever happen. Castiel had said the three words that Dean feared the most in this world and he couldn't take them back. Shit.

The moment he came back to reality, Dean clambered off the bed in a hurry, stumbling to find his clothes. He began pulling them on as quickly as possible, not even noting the fact that Castiel was now sitting up and watching him with a half-hurt, half-drunk expression on his face.

"Dean? W-Where are you going?" he asked, voice shaking a little and Dean could tell that he was close to tears.

"Home. Just ... I think we should stay away from each other from now on," Dean slurred, not even sure if he was making sense anymore. That didn't matter though.

When he finally made it outside, he ran. He ran as fast as he could, lungs screaming for air as tears welled in his eyes. He ran until the muscles in his legs were cramping with pain. Just a few more miles. Just a few more miles. He needed to get as far away from Cas and 'I love you' as he could. The words kept spinning around in his head and echoing like a broken gramophone record.

His stomach is what finally stopped him. He found himself stumbling to a halt and doubling over on an empty sidewalk to throw up pretty much everything he'd eaten in the past 24 hours.

Once his stomach stopped emptying itself, he slouched over on a bench and breathed heavily, staring up at a nearby streetlight. Fuck. Now everything really was messed up and he didn't know what the hell to do.