A/N
Stephenie Meyer is a goddam genius and when she wasn't looking, I took her formula and reworked it a little.
Thank you to IrishTwiSisters for her awesome beta work. She keeps me in line when I stagger around, drunk on my own fail.
Thank you to LambCullen for pre reading. She helps with cuddles during my emo panda moments. I worship at her altar everyday and twice on a Sunday.
Sunfeathers, we enjoy the prime piece of real estate on your corner and our love and devotion knows no bounds.
Music for the Chapter:
Lightning Crashes: Live
Underneath It All: No Doubt
Hows It Gonna Be: Third Eye Blind
Angel: Sarah McLachlan
Black Balloon: The Kills
The ambulance arrived and they quickly got to work. While they opened the car door and checked me over, Edward told me to hang up the phone.
"I'm not far away, I can see the ambulance."
I put the phone in my pocket as the ambulance crew unbuckled my seatbelt and put me on a stretcher. They dabbed at my face and I could smell the latex on their gloves and sterile liquid. An emergency blanket was wrapped around my body and it crackled, the foil catching the light.
"Bella!"
That voice, it was like a liquid warm blanket surrounding me. It felt like a weight sat on my chest and it was marginally better as soon as I could feel him close by. A small flashlight was shined in my eyes and I blinked.
"Sir, give us some room so we can work."
"Edward," I looked at the man leaning over me, "Please let him through."
I felt a warm, strong hand was squeezing my hand and I was drowning in beautiful green eyes.
"How do you feel, sweetheart?" his voice wrapped around me, comforting, and I sighed then gasped.
"It hurts to breathe." I felt my brows draw together and his eyes were worried.
"You're going to the hospital, honey." A uniformed man interrupted as he and another EMT started to lift my stretcher towards the ambulance.
"Edward." I called for him, needing him near. My body felt shivery and voices around me seemed muffled.
"Sorry, only family in the ambulance, sir."
"Fuck that, I'm coming."
"I'm really sorry sir, but that's not our rule, it's hospital policy. We can't let you ride in the ambulance."
"Fuck you!"
Edward's face reappeared above mine and he kissed my forehead, "I won't be far, Bella. I'll follow right behind the ambulance, ok?"
"Ok, Edward."
I closed my eyes as they loaded me into the ambulance and felt myself starting to drift.
***
When I opened my eyes next, it was to the doctor standing over me, listening to my heartbeat.
"Dr. Gerandy?"
His eyes crinkled behind his glasses, "Good to see you awake, Bella."
He wrapped his stethoscope around his neck and made a note on my chart before putting it back at the end of my bed.
Dr Gerandy and I had a close relationship. My total lack of balance and control over my body seemed to make me a frequent visitor to the ER. I had been on a first name basis with most of the nurses in the ER during my high school career in Forks. Dr. Gerandy was one of those kindly old bachelor doctors who instantly made you feel better once he walked into the room. He had also enjoyed going fishing with Charlie when he had a weekend free.
"How do you feel Bella?"
I took in a deep breath and groaned as my chest ached. My hands flew to my ribs.
"Like a cow is sitting on my chest."
Dr Gerandy chuckled, "You hit yourself pretty hard on the steering wheel. Don't worry though, you're only bruised. No broken bones this time and your head is superficial. You didn't even need stitches this time," he smiled at me and winked.
Then he continued, "I've had a prescription filled for you for your chest. You're free to go, Bella. Come back in immediately if you feel dizzy or nauseous, ok?"
I smiled at him, "Ok."
Dr. Gerandy stepped closer to me his face changing to concern, "How have you been lately Bella? I know these last few months since your parents passed have been very hard on you. I prescribed some medication for anxiety as I recall. How are you feeling?"
I looked at him and then down at my hands, wringing my fingers, "I'm still having nightmares."
"And the panic attacks? Are you still as anxious?" he asked.
I nodded and looked up at him, "Dr Gerandy, I wanted to come in and see you anyways. I don't think I'm going to manage going back to school this semester. I'm not coping well and I don't think I'll be able to concentrate on anything. Can you help me ask the University for a medical release for this semester?"
He nodded, "I can, Bella. If that's what you want. What will you do while you're not at school?"
"I'm going to spend the semester in Alaska with-with friends." My thoughts turned to Edward and I felt better.
"Well, as long as you have something planned. You know I'm a phone call away. Your father was a good friend of mine, and anything I can do to help, you let me know." He patted my leg and smiled at me.
"Thanks." I settled back against the pillows.
"Oh, I almost forgot! Bella, Officer Forge is here to see you. Would it be alright if I let him in? He wants to ask you a few questions about the accident."
I nodded in response, and Dr. Gerandy let Waylon Forge into the room before closing the door behind him.
Alone in the room with Waylon, his face brought back vague memories of childhood. He had been a close friend of Charlie's for nearly thirty years. I remember he played Santa one year at the Officer's Christmas Party. The boys had labelled him Butt Crack Santa as his costume hadn't exactly fit him and I remember he had been giving out these little bottles of Peppermint Schnapps as a joke.
I smiled at the memory and the camaraderie of the police force until it was brought into sharp contrast to my father's funeral. My mind flashed through images of dress uniforms and a piper playing Danny Boy. I blinked trying to shut the memory away. Waylon shuffled into the room and adjusted his gun belt, the familiar sound of leather creaking and keys jingling made my throat tight.
He was not a handsome man by any stretch, but his eyes were kind and warm as he smiled at me, "Hi Bells. How are you holding up?"
I tried to breathe slowly, my chest hurting from more than the steering wheel as I looked at his uniform. "Fine, I guess."
He ducked his head and his hands pulled at the bottom of his jacket before settling in his pockets as he leaned back against the medical counter along the far wall.
"Good. We had your truck towed to Dowling's for the time being. He said he would have a look at it for you." Waylon shifted and pulled out a small notepad from a pocket inside his Sheriff's jacket.
"Do you want to tell me what happened?" he asked. His eyes were all business and official now as he quickly jotted down something.
His pen flew over the page as I explained about my brakes and trying to stop before I entered the intersection. I closed my eyes and tried to remain calm as my mind replayed in slow motion the truck, the logs, and their terrifyingly slow progression. I stiffened as the sensation of the impact jolted through my body again as my mind tortured me with it over and over. I could feel myself starting to break out in a sweat, remembering how close I had come to hitting the truck straight on and not just the back corner.
I stole a glance at Waylon's face. He was writing down another note and I swallowed audibly, "There was something else."
He looked up in question.
"There was a picture. Someone put a picture in my truck."
His brows furrowed, "What do you mean, picture?"
I quickly described the haunting image of flames licking over Charlie's house, their burning intensity captured in black and white. I told him about the note, MISSED YOU, written across the front and shuddered at the memory of them.
Waylon stared at me, his eyes wide and then he went back to his notepad, his pen franticly scribbling.
"Where is this picture now?"
"Still in the truck." I said hoarsely.
He nodded, "I'm gonna drive over to Dowling's and have a look. Don't you worry Bells, We'll figure this out, ok honey? Here is my card, if you think of anything else, call me right away."
I took the offered business card from him, the insignia for Forks Sheriff Department emblazoned next to his name and number.
"Oh, by the way, I called Jacob Black for you. He and the gang are in the lobby. I'll let them know you'll be discharged soon on my way out."
Ah, small town life. I would not miss everyone knowing everyone's business.
"Um, actually, there should be an Edward Cullen waiting as well," as I spoke, Waylon's eyes were confused, "Edward is tall, bronze hair, tattoos. Can you ask him to come back here for me?"
"Umm, sure thing, Bella." He gave me a puzzled look and then quietly left the room, closing the door behind him.
I sat up, my chest protesting the entire time. I rested for a moment and then slid my feet over the side of the bed.
The door opened as I was putting my shoes on. I smiled as Edward walked into the room, concern written on his face.
"Bella." He said my name and his voice brushed over me like a caress. I stood up from tying my shoes and my body was drawn to him, every molecule of my being pulled to his presence.
He moved closer and I was in his arms, trying to absorb his strength. He pulled me tighter and kissed the top of my head. I let out a soft cry and hissed air in between my teeth as pain washed over me.
"Edward…"
He loosened his hold immediately.
"Fuck, Bella. I'm sorry. Where are you hurt?" His eyes scanned my frame, looking for injury. His hands gripped my arms gently, running up and down.
"It's ok, it's just my chest. I slammed into the steering wheel apparently." I looked up at him and tried to smile reassuringly.
His hands moved up my arms to my shoulders and he lowered his head to brush his lips over mine.
"As long as you're ok. When are they letting you out?"
"Now. I can't get out of here fast enough. I haven't been here since…" my voice faded away and he looked at me, waiting for me to finish. Then his eyes widened as he put it together.
My mind cruelly flashed to dimmed light and vomit green tiled walls. There was a sicky sweet smell in there that clung to your nostrils...
"Hey. Come back, you're far away." I blinked and looked into his green eyes. He brushed a lock of my hair behind my ear and caressed the back of his fingers down my jaw. My breathing calmed and my chest felt warm.
"That's better. Come on, I'll take you out of here." His fingers smoothed down my cheeks and his palms held my jaw. Our eyes held for a moment and then we moved together to walk out of the room.
I grabbed my bag from the counter and the small white paper sack holding my prescription. Lacing my fingers with Edward's, I allowed him to lead me out of the hospital room.
We walked down the hall, and I leaned into his side. His hand dropped mine and he put his arm around my shoulders. I breathed in his scent and briefly closed my eyes. His hand squeezed my shoulder and I was soothed as we walked through the halls.
When we got to the lobby, I looked up as Jake ran forward followed by Sam.
"Bella are you ok? What happened? Dr Gerandy said you had an accident." Before I could stop him, he wrenched me away from Edward and crushed me in a hug.
"Ow, Jake. My chest. My-"
Jake released me and I stepped back, "Sorry Bells." Jake's gaze shifted from mine to over my shoulder at Edward, his eyes narrowed.
I moved towards Edward and took his hand. We were joined by Jared, Embry, Quil, Seth, and Emily. Their faces were worried as they took in my dishevelled clothes and I could feel them scanning me.
Sam was the first to speak, "What happened?"
"I-I'm not sure, but the doctor says I'm ok," I muttered. The picture I'd found in the truck flashed through my memories. Someone was trying to hurt me but I didn't want it spread around Forks. I crossed my arms and felt myself lean backward, knowing Edward was right behind me, supporting me. The more I stood there, the more I just wanted out of this place, out of the hospital, and out of Forks.
I tried to think of a way to change the subject and I realized someone was missing. "Where's Paul?"
Emily rolled her eyes, "They picked him up for fighting last night. Again."
The rest of the group shifted uncomfortably. Paul's temper had always had a way of causing worry and anxiety amongst his close friends.
"Thanks for coming, guys. I'm sorry if I gave you a fright. I'm really tired and I just want to sleep." I yawned then, clutching a hand over my heart as my chest protested.
They each said their goodbyes and left quietly. Jacob stayed behind though; his arms folded over his chest as he watched Edward and me. Every now and again, Edward would stroke his hand over my arm or down my back. Eventually everyone had left, leaving Jake.
He stepped closer, "Do you want me to give you a ride back to the house?"
"Um, no, Jake. I'm going with Edward." I said warily.
Jacob's jaw flexed and he gave a withering glance to Edward. "Whatever."
Then he turned around and walked to the exit. The sliding glass doors moved mechanically to open and then sucked shut behind him.
Edward moved my hair over my shoulder and I felt his lips at my ear, "Are you ready to go, sweetheart?"
"Yes." I whispered, my eyes still on the place where Jacob had been.
Edward took my hand and matched his long stride to my small one as we walked outside to his car. I leaned into his strength as we moved together. Outside in the parking lot, the sun seemed too bright and I squinted in the sunlight.
Edward opened the car door for me and I got in slowly. When we were buckled in, Edward started the car and I tried to relax in the seat.
We drove for a moment and finally he broke the silence, "What the fuck happened, Bella?"
I had closed my eyes, the steady hum of the car engine lulling me to sleep. Opening them I sat up slightly in my chair and my breath broke as my chest pinched and ached.
I described the picture that had been in my truck and told him about my brakes and the truck.
"What the fuck, Bella? Are you fucking serious?" he turned to glance at me before looking back at the road. I watched as his hands tightened on the steering wheel, his knuckles more prominent.
"Bella, there is some sick fuck hanging around Forks. We are leaving for Alaska tomorrow." his voice was dark with anger and concern.
"I can't just up and leave, Edward." I said, my voice tired.
He looked over at me and then back at the road. He drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly.
"Can we just go back to the hotel? I feel so tired." I replied, my voice thick with fatigue.
He looked over at me again, "Yeah and when we get there, all you're going to do is rest." One of his hands rested on my knee and ran up my thigh, squeezing gently.
"'Kay." I said and closed my eyes again.
I felt the car turn sharply as Edward pulled into the hotel parking lot. I unbuckled the seatbelt when the car came to a stop and gingerly shrugged out of it.
He held me as we stood in front of the elevator and didn't let go of me until we were in his room. I leaned into his strength, and I felt a need to melt into him.
He pulled the bed covers back while I undressed. I moaned as I lifted my shirt over my head.
"Jesus Fuck, Bella!" I quickly pulled the shirt over my head to see what he was looking at.
I jumped, as he had moved so closely to me. He raised an unsteady hand and ran it lightly over my breastbone. I looked down and sucked in a breath. There was a large bruise in the shape of the steering wheel imprinted into my skin. There was also a dark line that ran diagonally over my chest where the seatbelt had dug into me. I felt his lips press along my purple skin gently.
"Does it hurt?" he asked, his voice heavy with emotion.
"You're making it go away." I put my hands on his shoulders as he knelt in front of me. I swayed, his lips sending delicious shivers over my body, making my nipples peak in my bra.
His hands were on my hips and he whispered huskily against my heart, "Fuck, Bella. If something had happened to you-"
My hands moved into his hair and I lifted his face, "But it didn't, and I'm here. And we're together." my breath hitched as a yawn took over. I whimpered as I struggled to take in air.
Edward stood and lifted me up gently into his arms. He laid me down on the linen sheets and tucked the covers around me. Kicking his shoes off, he got in beside me and I moved over to him slowly. I settled into his embrace and sighed as his arms moved around my back.
I slid my hands up inside his t-shirt, the feel of skin beneath my fingers reassuring and reaffirming strength, warmth, and being alive. Breathing in his familiar soothing scent, I closed my eyes fully, his steady heartbeat lulling me to sleep. Right before I slipped under the surface, I felt his lips brush against my temple, and my hair smoothed back from my face.
***
My eyes opened and I felt disoriented. I must have slept straight through to the next morning. The light streaming through the tacky hotel curtains was golden and it fell gently like a patient ghost sitting on the edge of the bed. Little pieces of dust sparkled in and out of the light giving the cheap room an ethereal glow.
The sounds of water rushing and splashing was slightly hushed behind the bathroom door. I smiled, listening to Edward in the shower. I thought of his hands roaming over his skin, his hair wet from the spray, his green flamed forearms slick from the water, tendons flexing, as he rubbed soap over his chest.
The water shut off abruptly and I listened to water drip from the tap and the rustle and snap of a towel. Muffled footsteps echoed and then the sink was turned on. I drifted in and out of sleep in bed, the quiet rhythm of Edward's morning rituals calming and reassuring me; transporting me back to a place an ocean away.
I allowed my mind to intrude and it ran over the events of the previous day. There was no doubt in my mind that the streets where my father once kept order as Chief of Police now seemed unsafe and unwelcoming to me. The town where I had been born I could no longer call home. Home was supposed to be a haven and the deep dark mossy shadows held hidden malicious secrets.
Telling Jacob I was leaving was not going to be easy. I could sense he had changed since I'd come back from Scotland. I knew he wanted more from me now, and it was more than I was able to give him.
I sighed, thinking about what life was going to be like living with Edward.
What if I bored him after awhile? What if he decided he just couldn't live with me?
My brain attempted to reject those thoughts, trying to inject positive outlooks by replaying Edward making love to me in a green field where sunny deities looked on and rain washed away doubts.
I jumped as the bathroom door opened and Edward stepped out, running his hand through his hair. His silver ring caught the sunlight briefly as he lowered his hand back to his side.
My breath caught at the sight of him as he stepped into the room. A towel was wrapped around his waist, a narrow trail of hair disappearing behind the white terry cloth. His hair was still slightly damp and his supple skin stretched over defined muscles in his arms, his chest and his abdomen. His tattoos lent an edge to his statuesque presence. His beautifully carved body moved with unconscious fluid grace as he moved towards me.
His bottle green eyes met mine and I blushed as he caught me looking at him. My eyes moved to his navel and I blushed deeper as I imagined running my fingers over it before leaning in to taste him there. I wondered if he would jump, remembering how ticklish he was.
His arms were on either side of me and I smiled at him as he smirked at me. He brushed his lips over mine and then whispered in my ear, "How are you feeling?"
I licked my lips, "Good now that you're here."
"Good." I felt his nose skim over my jaw before he planted a kiss on my unburied collarbone.
He got off me and I felt the loss of his closeness. He made up for it by dropping the towel and looking over his shoulder at me.
I watched as he slowly put his boxers on and then slid his jeans up over his hips. He dug a green t-shirt out of a drawer and put it on. I watched as his chest and stomach slowly disappeared under cotton the same color as his eyes. I sighed dreamily as he turned to look at me.
"What?" he asked.
"Nothing."
He smiled and leaned over me. The bed creaked as he climbed on top of me. He kissed my cheeks.
"Tell me."
"No."
His lips skimmed over my cheekbone and lower to my ear.
"Tell me."
"N-no."
He sucked my ear lobe into his mouth. My arms were trapped underneath the blanket that his hands were pressing down. My body was humming and heat pooled between my legs.
He let my ear lobe go, "Tell me now."
"No," I sighed.
He kissed my neck and then moved over my jaw. His lips hovered over mine. I was breathing in quick breaths.
"Just tell me."
"You make me wet just looking at you." I whispered.
He groaned and his lips captured mine. His lips moved against mine, his tongue demanding entrance. I opened up for him and shivered as his tongue met mine. My stomach tied into knots and my body writhed underneath the blankets. My legs opened of their own volition under the covers, and his hips settled between them.
Despite the soreness of my body from yesterday, I pushed my hips against him and he pushed back. It was frustrating, I needed more, I needed him. I moaned into his mouth as he pushed again and I met him halfway.
He gasped into my mouth and his lips left mine, his face resting on the side of my neck.
"Bella, we can't. I'm afraid of hurting you." He lifted his head and his green eyes burned into mine.
"I'm fine." I lied.
"You're not, I can tell. You can barely take a breath in without it catching." His eyes were lit with worry as he brushed his lips over mine again.
"Please Edward." I licked my lips
"I promise to make it up to you later. Promise." He sealed his words with another kiss, this one was gentle and sweet, his tongue gently coaxing me to come out of a pout. It worked and I was kissing him back, returning the love and worry he poured into the kiss.
***
A little while later I was dressed and we were eating room service breakfast. I was munching a piece of toast happily and watching as Edward attacked his eggs.
I had a plan already in mind to talk to Jacob but I would need Edward's cooperation in order to make it as painless as possible.
"Can I ask you something?"
He looked up and nodded, as he swallowed and took a drink of juice, his Adam's apple bobbing.
I shifted in my chair and licked my lips, "We're leaving for Alaska tomorrow, right?"
He nodded, "We could leave today if you want."
"No, tomorrow is fine. I just…need to tell Jacob goodbye." I watched as he paused and then put his fork down.
"Can't you just call him?" he asked, his tone careful.
"I can't. He's like family, Edward. I don't want to hurt him." I watched his eyes as his face hardened.
"I'm coming with you." he insisted.
Shaking my head I looked at his face, "I don't think you can. It will be tense enough saying goodbye to him and you two seem to be on edge around each other as it is."
"Dammit Bella. Someone is out there and they're after you."
I tried to stand my ground, "I have to do this, Edward. Please help me and then we'll go to Alaska tomorrow."
He sighed, "Fine, but I don't fucking like this. You text me or phone me the minute he breathes funny. Ok?"
"Ok."
***
Everything was almost perfect. I knew what time Jacob would be home and had anticipated having dinner ready for six. Edward had reluctantly agreed to stay at the hotel after dropping me off. I felt awful and wished I could just get past the next few hours.
Jacob's dad was at a neighbor's, watching the Mariner's game. So it left the house to just the two of us. Normally it would be pizza night, and the guys would probably be vying for the best spots in front of Jacob's TV. I had asked Emily to host the guys as I wanted these last minutes alone with my best friend.
He was that to me: my best friend. One of the only friends that had survived childhood and into adolescence. Inside, I felt like I was bleeding out, not wanting to say this good bye to Jacob. I adjusted my black t-shirt again and took in the last details of the living room that had been a second home to me throughout my time in Forks.
There were various family artefacts on the walls, most of them Native American in design. Their colors of turquoise and orange and black adding color to the room. The old leathered couch was parked in the middle of the room like a sleeping naked elderly Buddha, wrinkled and well worshipped. The TV was a new edition, a present from the guys on Billy's 40th birthday. It was large and seemed almost out of place amidst the traditional feel to the room.
There were pictures of Jacob from baby to senior year as well as his sisters. The pictures were like mini flags on a timeline that paraded its way around the room, the procession finishing in front of a framed old photo of Jacob's mother. She had died when Jacob was a baby but her memory was a real presence in the living room.
The fireplace was well stocked with tools and packages of kindling. Billy made sure Jacob had kept a small pile of wood outside for chilly nights in the winter.
I jumped as the front door shut, and Jacob shuffled in, sighing. He stopped, his nose in the air, and I smiled at him as his eyes rested on me. He smiled at me and looked around, his brow furrowed.
"Where are the guys? I thought it was pizza night." He nodded towards the couch and the silent TV.
"They're at Emily's," I bit my lip as I looked at him and then away, "I made you dinner."
I heard his footsteps shuffle forward and I looked up when his boots came into my line of vision.
"Thanks, Bells. I've missed seeing you," he said, and there was a husky note in his voice. When I looked into his eyes, I knew what I would see there. Jake wore his feelings in his eyes, like an open window.
Jake loved my fried chicken, I knew it, and he always rolled his eyes back in his head when I made it. I watched as he sat down at the small table in the kitchen. I served him a plate of chicken with mashed potatoes and greens. I giggled as he rolled his eyes back as the steaming plate was placed in front of him.
He waited for me to sit down with my own plate, then began eating in silent ecstasy. He took a sip of the milk I had placed in front of him and wiped his mouth.
"So, how come we're alone and having my favorite?" He eyed me from behind another piece of chicken.
"What? I can't cook for my best friend?" I asked evasively.
"You can cook, we both know I'm never gonna turn down anything you put in front of me, honey." I blushed at his words and looked down at my plate, making a pyramid out of my mashed potatoes with my fork.
We ate in comfortable silence and when he finished, he scooted back from the table and patted his belly.
"Geez, Bella. I'm totally stuffed."
I got up and took his empty plate, adding my still half full one on top before moving them to the sink. I pulled out the apple pie I had made and served a slice onto a plate for him. When I sat it in front of him, his eyes bulged and he straightened in his chair.
"Ok, who died?" he said as he picked up his fork.
I laughed nervously, "Just eat your pie, Jake."
He shoved a forkful of sticky apple and flaky pastry into his mouth. I looked down and traced the pattern in the wood on the table with my fingernail. I knew I couldn't delay this any longer.
I bit my lip and looked back up at him, "Jake, we need to talk."
He swallowed and narrowed his eyes, "I knew it. Spit it out, Swan." He pointed at me with his fork before going back to his pie.
I took a deep breath, "Jake, I'm leaving."
He chewed and shrugged his shoulders. Pocketing pie into his cheek, he muttered, "Yeah, college is going to start up again. I figured you would probably go soon. Do you want help-"
"No, Jake. I'm leaving Forks for Alaska." I watched his eyes as he digested my words.
There was a pause and he swallowed. "What's in Alaska?" he asked suspiciously.
"Well, Forks is no good for me. With all the things that have been going on the last six months, I just can't face school. I'm taking a semester off and moving to Alaska."
"Yeah, but why Alaska?" He furrowed his brow and looked at me, putting his fork down.
I chewed my lip before I answered but he beat me to it, "It's him, isn't it. You're leaving with him."
I nodded, "Yes, I'm leaving with Edward."
Jacob sighed heavily. The silence fell over the room, over the house, over the yard outside. It seemed the crickets had stopped chirping and the breeze no longer ruffled end of summer leaves.
There was a clock somewhere in the house that seemed to have an abnormally loud tick. Each second seemed to whittle away at my insides. Jake had always been there, he was like one of the craggy rocks on the La Push shoreline, a dark and constant guard against the tow of the tides. He was my goto and I was his.
But I felt this was something I had to do.
Finally, he spoke, "You can't run from things here in Forks forever, Bells. You know that.""I know, Jake. But I need some time away. And Edward, he makes it better for me. Can't you be happy that he makes me happy?""No." His denial, said with such firm calm, hit me like a lash, leaving a mark on my heart. "Jake, please." I looked at him, and felt my eyes well up with looked at me with his lip curled and then said through his teeth, "Get out, Bella. Just get out. And don't come back."I stood up quietly from the table and pushed my chair in. I couldn't look at Jake and felt tears roll down my face as I pulled my phone out of my pocket. I didn't want Edward to hear how upset I was, so I sent him a text to come and get me. He responded quickly. Ten minutes - E
I waited outside, listening for any sounds in the house. Jake was still sitting at the table, his half eaten pie slice in front of him.
I chafed my arms and felt lighter when Edward's headlights beamed from the top of the driveway. He stopped the car and got out.
"Bella? Why are you waiting outside?" he asked, his face concerned.
"I-I just thought it would be better." His finger lifted my chin up to him and he stroked along my jaw. I heard his breath catch when he saw my eyes were filling with tears again. I felt my gut go tight as my mind replayed Jake telling me to get out.
"What the fuck did he say to you?" he asked, his nostrils flared in anger, and his jaw started to tick.
"I told her to get out," The screen door snapped back and slammed as Jake pushed it behind him angrily, "And you can get the hell off my land."
Edward snapped, "Bella, get in the car." He rushed forward and had Jacob against a wall.
"I told her this wasn't a good idea," Edward seethed, "But she felt like she fucking owed you something. Now she's standing on your porch crying. What the fuck is your deal?"
"Edward, let him go. Please." I screeched at them and I saw Edward's body tense as he held Jacob against the wall.
"Bella, we're going to have this out right now. I don't fucking care," Edward let go of Jacob and backed off of him, "C'mon you little shit, throw the first punch."
I started to cry in earnest and my stomach twisted, "The two of you are so fucking selfish. I have been through a lot the last couple of days, the last couple of months. You want to duke it out here in the yard, go on ahead. You don't care that this hurts me to see you fighting! You don't care that it is ripping my insides out to see my best friend and the guy I love fighting like a couple of school kids. Fuck you both." I turned around to move towards the car and stood and waited, watching the porch over my shoulder.
They were staring at each other, both of them panting. Jake's eyes flickered to mine then back to Edward. Jake's stance relaxed and he backed away. Edward relaxed and then straightened as he watched Jake stomp into the house, the door snapping closed behind him.
I opened the car door and sat down. The tears had stopped and I wiped away the wetness from my face. I was so angry I couldn't even talk.
I watched Edward walk to his side of the car and get in. The car door slammed behind him and he shifted the car into gear and turned it around to drive down the gravelled driveway. He eased the car onto the road and floored it, the tires squealing. At some point during the drive, he rolled the window down and had lit a cigarette.
I looked out the window, not able to look at him. We rode silently back to the hotel and I wouldn't let him help me out. I stood away from him on the other side of the elevator and marched down the hallway.
He slid the key card in the door and I opened it before he could. I moved inside ahead of him and went directly into the bathroom, locking the door behind me.
I turned the tap on and then slid down onto the floor.
Jacob telling me to get out and never come back was one of the most horrible things anyone has ever said to me. I was angry, I was upset, but I was hurt most of all. How could he? How could he do that to me? Say that to me? I loved him like a brother. My chest ached, my breathing hitched and my throat tried to close over the deep hurt filled sobs wracking me. I put my fist to my mouth, I didn't want Edward to know how upset I was.
There was a knock at the door.
"Bella?"
I cleared my throat and tried to sound normal, "Go away, Edward. I'm mad at you."
"I'm sorry, ok? I just saw he had upset you and I reacted. I'm sorry."
"Ok." I was still holding onto my breath and it broke in a loud hiccup.
"Let me in, Bella. I know you're crying in there."
"No, Edward, I need to be by myself," I answered.
"What, so you can sit in there and wallow? No fucking way. C'mon, just unlock the door. I don't want you crying alone on some shitty hotel bathroom floor."
I sat there for a few minutes, trying to calm down and then scooted off the floor to unlock the door. He opened the door immediately. He shut the water off and the silence seemed deafening. His eyes were intense and he pulled me into his arms. My face was muffled against his chest and I resisted for an instant but Edward was irresistible, the strength and comfort he offered were like a drug I wanted released into my bloodstream. I turned my cheek so it rested against his heart and my arms found their way around his waist. His smell, his touch moved over me and I breathed in and out, my eyes closed.
"I'm so fucking sorry, Bella." His fingers traced a renegade tear down my cheek and smoothed it away.
"It just hurts so much, Edward, what he said. Then you two fighting on top of it; I just can't handle it." My chest hiccupped painfully and my breath hitched and I felt myself start to yawn. My eyes watered again and I struggled to fill my lungs.
He felt me yawn and his hands caressed down my spine, "Let's go to bed."
I stripped out of my clothes, down to my underwear. I reached around my back but my body was still too sore to undo my bra. He was behind me and his fingers undid the clasp. He kissed the centre of my back where my bra had been and goose bumps shivered over my skin. His hands settled on my hips and he kissed the side of my neck. I sighed and leaned back towards him. One of his hands moved and playfully squeezed my ass, his voice soft in my ear.
"I love you, Bella."
I turned my face to his and kissed his lips, "I love you too, Edward."
His hands left me to pull his shirt over his head, and I pulled my black t-shirt back on. Leaving my pink boy shorts on, I went into the bathroom and splashed my face. When I was back in the room, Edward was already in the bed, waiting for me.
I padded over, his arms opened and I fell into them, tumbling towards the ecstasy I knew laid within his simple touch. Comforted, I lay within the arms of my angel, and the dark cold hotel room melted away.
I was asleep before he turned the light out.
***
The next morning we left Forks. It was raining softly and there was no sunlight poking through the gray clouds.
Edward steered through the main street and we passed by the sporting goods store where I had my first job. The dentist where I had my first cavity filling went by as well as the coffee shop where I used to hang out with my friends after school. Dowling's flashed by and my dented and broken truck sat sadly in the parking lot. Edward and I had discussed having it shipped up to Alaska where it could be worked on. I still hadn't decided yet, Mr Dowling had confirmed on the phone it would be very expensive to fix as the truck was practically an antique.
We took the road north, and I looked back at Forks in the passenger side mirror. It seemed to take forever for the last few shops to fade from view. We passed the Welcome To Forks sign and I watched it drift away slowly in the passenger side mirror.
I noticed there was a small inscription on the mirror itself, written in white bold capitals:
OBJECTS IN THE REAR VIEW MIRROR MAY APPEAR CLOSER THAN THEY ARE.
A/N
Gawd, thank Fuck we're out of Forks. Next update should be later this week, I've been a busy chick.
FUCK ME SIDEWAYS HAVE YOU SEEN NEW MOON YET?! *FUCKING DIED*
And finally…
I'm posting this towards the end, cause I don't know if you'll read it but here it is.
I just want to personally thank each and every one of you for reading this story. I want to personally thank those of you who review.
The auctions this week, and the participation in the Fandom Gives Back took my breath away. I was humbled that some of you were willing to bid on me and thanks again to Prassacut and AshnanPhillips who were the winning bidders.
On a personal note, this fandom means a lot to me. The people I've met, the friends I've made, are precious to me. If I tried to name you all, I might as well post a chapter of names. So just thanks for all the pervy pic drooling, for the ROFL-mania on twitter, for being supportive of me and of each other. It goes to show you that it's more than sparkle peen and Edward Cullen that brings us together. I love you pervy h00rs, I really really do.
Srsly.