Priestly stared at the ceiling from his spot on the carpet where he had laid down last night after finding his bed and the couch just weren't cutting it. He couldn't believe what he had said to Tish and to Joe. It was like he was watching from the inside while his mouth spoke on its own. He felt like he was going crazy, and maybe he was. Last night he had snapped, something he knew would inevitably happen but hoped wouldn't around Tish. He felt sick. His relationship with Tish was over and it was all his fault. He wanted to call her and apologize, beg for forgiveness but knew it wouldn't help anything. It's for the best he decided. Tish deserved more than he could offer. She deserved someone who would always make her happy, someone who would always treat her right, someone who wasn't weak and broken and a freak. Priestly felt tears prick at his eyes as he remember Tish's words. Hearing her call him the word he despised the most was so much more painful than anything he had ever gone through before. Everything his father had done paled in comparison because he loved Tish and trusted her and she had thrown it all back in his face.

He lifted his head off the carpet to look at the door when a loud knock interrupted his thoughts. He knew the person he wanted to be on the other side of the door wasn't there so who the hell was it? Hearing the knocking again he lifted himself of the floor and walked to the door angrily. Whoever was on the other side was going to have just as much of a bad day as he was already having.

As soon as he jerked the door open a fist flew towards his face, connecting with a sickening crunch, Priestly staggered back clutching his bloody nose. "What the fuck?"

Joe walked in and slammed the door behind him before grabbing the front of the smaller man's shirt and slamming him against the wall. His head hit so hard he actually blacked out for a few seconds. He tried to get his eyes to focus but the pain in his head made it difficult.

Joe stepped back and pointed to the couch. "Sit down now."

Priestly stood defiantly, or as defiantly as he could on his wobbling knees. "You don't come into my house and boss me around. Who the fuck do you think you are?"

Losing what little patience he had left he grabbed Priestly and threw him down on the couch before staring down at him.

"I told you if you ever broke her heart I'd kill you, so I strongly suggest you plead your case right now."

Priestly held out his arms. "Just do it Joe, put me out of my fucking misery!" To his and Joe's surprise his voice came out pleading instead of angry.

Joe's fury drained out of him instantly at Priestly's words and tone. He couldn't tell if he was being melodramatic or serious. "Kid talk to me, what happened yesterday? What's up with you?"

"Oh, now I get to tell my side of the story. Nothing happened yesterday Joe. I ran into an old friend who happened to be a girl and we caught up. I went straight to Tish's yesterday because I wanted to talk to her about something then she goes off when I walk in the door. She doesn't trust me Joe, she called me a freak." His angry rant that had started with a loud voice ended in a cracked whisper.

Joe blew out a breath, "When I got there you were banging on the door cursing the world. You scared her, and me. What was that?"

The young man on the couch shook his head, "I couldn't control myself Joe. I feel so far out in left field right now it's not even funny. I was two seconds away from kicking her door when you grabbed me."

Joe watched the man carefully knowing this was going to get much, much worse before it got better.

"Priestly, there's something that's been bugging me since I met you."

The young man looked up at him curiously, waiting for him to continue. Joe's calm voice and random sentence had thrown him.

"Your eyes."

Priestly blinked before frowning, "My eyes?" He felt lost, what was Joe even talking about?

Joe's expression hardened slightly, "I don't think Tish sees it because she doesn't know what she looking for, but I do. I've been with the FBI for a while now, and I'm very, very good at my job. I've seen and dealt with enough people to get a pretty good read on them just off their eyes. Working in homicide there's always been one constant; it's a hardness, a sharpness that I've only ever seen in eyes that have watched the life drain out of someone at their own hands. You have those eyes..."

He watched the man on the couch tense, his fight or flight response kicking in. He could see every muscle in his body coil, ready to lash out at any threat. He watched fearful, apprehensive light green eyes harden in an instant to unrecognizable rage filled orbs.

"...don't you Boaz?"

The confused and upset Priestly was gone, replaced by a hard but calm man. "So you know everything huh? You know Tish has been playing house with a murderer. What are you gonna do about it Joe?" The question was asked so calmly, as if he was asking him if he wanted cherry or apple pie. His tone was that of someone with nothing left to lose.

"What do you think I should do?"

Priestly stared calmly at him, "Well you should probably arrest me but we both know I'm not going to let that happen."

Joe stood at the ready, knowing something was going to go down soon. He was still surprised though when Priestly launched off the couch and attacked him, fists flying. Priestly was like a wild animal, instincts and survival winning over a disciplined attack. Joe finally gained the upper hand after receiving a few good hits and shoved him away. "You really think that was gonna work?"

Priestly smirked humorlessly and held up Joe's sidearm, "I think it did work."

Joe's heart started to race, this was going so much worse than anticipated. He couldn't believe his stupidity. He had brought his weapon as protection, not knowing how Priestly was going to react. Now he was staring down the barrel of his own gun with a murderer on the other end all because he fell for a simple diversion.

Priestly pointed the gun towards him. "I'm sorry it had to be like this Joe, I never wanted to hurt Tish, or you. I was crying for help and no one seemed to notice but I guess they will now huh?" His voice sounded defeated and it scared Joe.

Joe watched fearfully as Priestly flipped off the safety with a flick of his thumb. "Let's talk about this kid."

Priestly scoffed, "What's there to talk about Joe? Huh? I'm going to jail for murder, forever. There's no deals or escapes, there's nothing. Tish is gone, I messed that up. I have nothing left Joe. No. I'm taking care of this once and for all."

Joe's gaze fell on Priestly's finger which curled around the trigger. What happened next was completely unexpected. Instead of Priestly pulling the trigger he turned the barrel towards his head and rested the cool metal against his temple.

Joe held up his hands in a placating gesture, "Priestly put the gun down, ok? We need to talk about this." His heart was beating so loudly he was surprised he could even still hear what Priestly was saying. Joe's mind went into over drive; he had to diffuse the situation quickly.

Large tears gathered before falling down Priestly's cheeks, "There's nothing to talk about Joe. I don't want to go to jail. Why is beating your child everyday ok but ending the abuse isn't? Why is it ok to punch your kid, to burn him, to hunt him down and beat the shit out of him? Where was everyone when I was needed help? I'm tired Joe, I'm just tired. I'm tired of all the bullshit and the everyday battle. It's better this way, nobody wants me."

God, this kids fucked up. "Priestly, I want you here. You're important to me."

Priestly just stared at him with dead eyes. Joe tried again, "What about Tish? This will destroy her. Do you want to do that, hurt Tish?"

The heavy gun wavered slightly as he sniffled. He looked so lost. "I already hurt Tish. All I do is hurt people. I just can't do this Joe, life's just too much. I've tried to be normal, I've tried to move past everything but I just can't. It's my fault mom's dead, it's my fault dad's dead, and it's my fault I hurt Tish."

Joe tried to think of anything to say to try to get through to him. "Priestly listen to me. Life sucks ok? It's hard and cruel and it'll knock you down every chance it gets. Then when you think it can't get any worse life kicks you again and grinds you into the dirt, but you know what? You get back up, dust yourself off and keep going because it's the only thing you can do. You keep going because there's people that want you to go on, because they need you as badly as you need them. Tish needs you Priestly, just as bad as you need her. Don't do this kid, give me the gun." He watched as Priestly broke eye contact, obviously thinking about everything Joe had just said. He watched as his grip around the gun slackened before his arm slowly dropped to his side. Joe slowly walked forward and gently grasped the gun before flicking on the safety and reholstering it. He watched Priestly carefully but the kid just stood there pathetically, the only thing moving was his silent tears sliding down his face. Joe hesitantly walked forward and grabbed the smaller man into a hug. Priestly stood still not returning the gesture. He continued hugging him as his own tears started to fall. This whole ordeal had scared the shit out of him. Joe pulled out his cell and called Tish.

"Joe? Where are you?"

"I'm at Priestly's."

"Why? I need to talk to him, not you." She heard a sniffle and Joe clearing his throat. Her nerves stood on end, "Joe what happened, what's wrong?"

"I'm coming back soon, I'll tell you then. Priestly's coming with me."

"Joe, what's wrong? Please give me something."

"Hang on." He moved the phone away from his head and let go of Priestly, leading him to the couch. Priestly sat silently as Joe walked to the kitchen where he could talk but still watch him.

"Priestly finally hit bottom Tish. It's bad, we need to keep an eye on him."

"Joe, what do you mean we need to keep an eye on him? What happened?"

The words were hard to say, his throat kept constricting. "He took my gun Tish, he tried…he tried to…"

He heard a sob on the end of the line, "Is he ok?"

"Physically ya. As for anything else I don't know."

"Somewhere in his apartment he has sleeping pills, Rozerem or something. Find them and give him two ok? Then get him here. Hurry Joe."

Joe searched through the bathroom finding nothing. He checked on Priestly again but he hadn't moved, it was like he had just checked out. He walked into his room and pulled open the nightstand drawer finding nothing. He sighed frustrated before walking to the closet and looking for something, anything that seemed out of place. Then he spotted it, the only shoe box in the closet and it looked almost new despite being older. He bent down and grabbed it before lifting off the top. He blew out a deep breath before grabbing everything in the box and stuffing it in his pockets. He grabbed the sleeping pills before going to the kitchen and getting a glass of water.

"Here Priestly, take these ok?"

Priestly slowly looked at him then at the pills in his outstretched hand. He reached out and took them before dry swallowing them. Joe sighed and set down the glass of water. "Come on kid, let's go."

The ride was silent, neither man knowing what to say. By the time they got to Tish's house Priestly was passed out, the pills having already put him to sleep. He walked around the passenger side and lifted the smaller man out. He was shocked at how light and frail he was. It killed him to see the man who he considered a friend this way. Last time he had seen him Priestly had been in great shape but now he was a shadow of himself. Tish swung open the door letting them in.

She opened her mouth to speak but Joe shook his head and headed for her bedroom. He walked in and gently laid Priestly down. Tish entered right behind him and removed Priestly's shoes and wiped his bloodied face with a warm washcloth. She sat by him and gently rubbed his head before brokenly asking, "What happened Joe?"

Joe stood by the doorway exhausted. "I know all about him Tish, after yesterday's episode I called in a favor. I know everything about him, everything he tried to hide."

Tish nodded silently waiting for him to continue.

"I went over there to confront him, I was so pissed but when I got there it was like it wasn't him. We got into an argument and scuffle then he grabbed my gun and… God Tish I've never been so scared in my life."

Tish placed the washcloth on the nightstand and stared at the sleeping form in front of her. "I don't understand what happened though, it's like he just lost it yesterday."

"He did lose it yesterday Tish, I think he's in the middle of a full blown breakdown and I think I know what's setting him off. We have to watch him, he might try something again."

The pair was silent for a few minutes before Tish asked, "Are you going to arrest him?"

Joe shook his head. "I think if I did it would do more harm than good to all parties involved. I still want to talk to him about everything though at some point. Come on, let him sleep we need to talk."

She leaned down and kissed Priestly's forehead before following Joe into the kitchen.

Tish sat quietly at the table as Joe paced back and forth. "Tish have you noticed anything off about him lately, or even in the last few months? Any different behavior?"

She thought hard, "He's seemed quieter lately. It's like even when he's laughing and happy he's almost holding back. He's been short too, but that's only been in the last few days."

"How long has this been going on?"

"Probably like three months, maybe longer."

"Tish there's something you need to see." Tish watched in horrified silence as Joe pulled out bottle after bottle of prescription pills out of his pockets. Anti-anxiety pills, pills for depression, for staying asleep, for falling asleep, for panic attacks.

She grabbed the bottles one by one. "What is all of this? Oh my God there's so many. How could I not notice Joe? How could I miss this, he was right. I'm supposed to be the one that notices things and I missed it. Everything's my fault."

Joe shut down her train of thoughts immediately, "This is not your fault Tish, none of it. The next few days are going to be hard, we need to watch him in case he tries anything again. He shouldn't ever be left alone."

Her glassy eyes widened, "You really think he'll try again?"

Joe nodded, "In his mind he's got nothing left to lose. He thinks its over between you two." He paused. "Is it?"

She began to cry softly, "I don't want it to be, I love him."

Joe walked over and hugged her tightly, "You go ahead and go to bed, I'm going to get the house safe for him. You take care of your room and I'll see you in the morning ok?"

She nodded silently and walked to her room.