Fight Fear With Fire

Ha, I look hideous with the hideous gash on my face. And I have to wake up every two hours, you know, to make sure I ain't dead. Now I'm just tired and freaking hungry.

To Xxforget-me-notxX: Hey, you were first this time! lol Wait, so if you're like Kanye, you're a gay fish? What's behind your back? Is that... a lighter? THAT explains the roasted marshmallows in my backyard, that I didn' t even roast. And I feel sorry for the Cartman puke person too. And all of your questions except number three will be answered. I put your answer to number four in just for you. Thanks!

To Kiakamon: Well, I've survived over a day, so I don't think I'm gonna di... *dies* *waits till next day* Hey, okay, I pulled a Kenny, and now I'm back. lol. Thanks. I know, Stan and Kyle are not exactly warriors, are they? Oh my god, if the clerk had told Cartman about it, he'd have just been "Screw you wizards, I know another way to kill Kyle!" That would have been a terrible way to get back at sweet little KyKy. Kyle won't become a vampire, because vamps, in the words of Aaron, "people just become vamps. It's kind of hard to explain. I guess it's just totally random." And this isn't a huge plot spoiler, so I'll tell you. The blood only has to come from the mouth if its being transferred directly. I don't know, it's the vamps idea, not mine. lol. The review did make it better! Thank you!

To mango-quincy: lol it's actually not shocking, if you know me. I'm kind of retarded when it comes to walking. Yeah, and that is the ONLY nice thing about hospitals. Ooh, I didn't wonder that, but now i wanna know. lol yep, that's our Percy! Well, I tell you that all three are alive in this chap. But who knows for how long? *shifty eyes* lol, i'll floss but I don't know about the what not. That'll be a bit time-consuming. Thanks!

To Hazel-Beka: It's not a bad concussion, and I'm a tough cookie, especially when it comes to my story. I wrote some of this when I had the stomach flu. I would be like "and aaron said... *puke* hi to someone *puke* and Kadira was like *pukes* dang!" lol But if I move to england, I MUST bring twinkies. Can't live without those things. And it rains in July? EEEEWWW! Rain sucks. I live where it rains like twice a year and its never under 100 degrees, so I guess I can't imagine rain in july. And that poor soul he puked on is probably like "Man, what is in the rain clouds today?" lol, I think insurance would be a really good idea with Artemis' stupidity. lol the floating donut? Yes, that's why she was upset. The love of her hour was gay. Or... yeah lol. And wizards just kick ass like that, they can wave a wand, hotwire a car, and keep igloos in their bedrooms. That poor man probably has so much bad luck, he's like, "Damn, my car... can I help you sir?" And funny dialogue is just my life. Me and my friends are nutcases, so everything running through my brain is stupid yet amusing, lol. Kyle's a quick recovererererer... is that a word? He recovers quickly. He still sees Cartman as the annoying fat ass he always was. Wait... the magic isn't real? I thought I was writing a biography! Damn, there goes my life's work. Thanks!

This chap's kinda retarded. I'm feeling totally 'WHEE' today! *zones out* Okay, here I am. I'm so hungry, and I wrote this chap in 10 mins, so it's a bit... "WHEE" for lack of better words. But I must trot along now. My mother says I spend a unhealthy amount of time on the computer. Well screw her. I think this is a very productive pasttime! I learn more about writing with every chap! I FINALLY REACHED THE CHAPTERS HIGH ENOUGH TO HAVE A DASH IN THE MIDDLE OF THE WORD! LOOK DOWN YOU GUYS!

Chapter Twenty-One: Yoda and Darth Vader Fight For A Cinnamon Stick– Kyle and Stan are confused, Kadira's irritable, Aaron's in pain, and Darius is tired. While Stan and Kyle play with a cinnamon stick (if your laughing now, your mind is perverted), Kadira tries to overcome her hatred of blood. And happiness.

"Woah… woah… okaaaaay…" Kyle mumbled, trying to catch his balance on the edge of the bridge they were standing on. Stan caught his hand, and he pulled himself back on. "Thank you."

Stan nodded and looked around. "Where's Cartman? Where are we?"

"I don't know…" Kyle said, "But it looks like something out of Star Wars."

"Yeah, totally," Stan agreed as he pulled a cinnamon stick out of his pocket, "Look! I'm Yoda!"

Kyle laughed. "No dude, I'm Yoda, I'm the short one."

"Then who am I?"

"…Darth Vader?"

"Sweeeet," Stan drawled, waving the cinnamon stick at Kyle. "Oooh bet you're scared now. Can't catch me!" He stuck the stick in Kyle's face and Kyle took a bite out of it.

Stan stared at his decapitated light saber when Kyle said, "Mmm, the force tastes good!"

Both boys laughed and looked around. "Maybe we should concentrate on where the hell we are," Kyle said.

"Agreed." Stan said, and the boys looked off of the edge of the metal bridge.

"Dude!" Kyle exclaimed suddenly.

"What?" asked Stan.

Kyle pointed below them. "Look at that!" Stan followed Kyle's finger and saw a tiny light far below them. "I think it's a door."

"Well, how do we get down there?"

Kyle shrugged and grabbed the half-eaten cinnamon stick from Stan and held it up like a sword. "I will lead the way."

"God, Kyle, you're so retarded."

"Shut up!" Kyle snapped, "Hey… can you like… light this on fire?"

Stan stared at the offered cinnamon stick. "Uh… why?"

"So we have light. In case you didn't notice, we can't even see to the end of the bridge."

"Oh, I thought you were gonna burn the place down," Stan said, using his hand to light the eaten end of the cinnamon stick.

Kyle laughed and began walking, using the torch they'd made for their guide. "Maybe it'll be like on National Treasure, when they like put one place on fire, and it led the way to where they wanted to go."

"Or maybe there'll be a big treasure!"

"Yeah, I don't think Cartman would put us in a place with treasure, though."

Stan's eyes widened. "Oh my god, I had completely forgotten what happened!"

"So had I, I just remember fat ass."

"They were after me, Kyle!" Stan exclaimed, "Why the hell did you grab on?"

Kyle rolled his eyes. "What, did you expect me to let you get kidnapped all by yourself?"

"Kyle, listen," Stan said, "You can't be doing this stuff. You have to be careful."

"Well, it's a bit late now," Kyle giggled.

"Seriously!" Stan snapped, "Please, I just don't want anything bad to happen to you."

Kyle groaned. "Stan, that's why I followed. I don't want anything bad to happen to you! And anyway, I thought we already had this conversation."

"I know, I know, I just don't want…"

"Why can't you consider me like your equal? You keep acting like you're in charge of me and I'm just some little kid. Stan, I really appreciate that you care about me, I really do, but I can make my own decisions."

Stan sighed. "I'm sorry. Let's just… get out of here, okay?"

"That's a good plan," Kyle agreed, "Damn. How long is this frickin bridge?"

"I think I see the end," Stan commented, and Kyle raised his torch higher. "Yeah… yeah… that's a wall."

Kyle nodded and approached it. "There should be like stairs down or something."

He led the way to one side, looking for some way out. "Nothing here."

"Nothing here either," Stan called from the other side. "Maybe we should go back across."

"Yeah, there must be stairs on the other side." Stan nodded and grabbed the torch from Kyle. "Hey!"

Stan looked at him. "You got to carry it on the way here."

"You're such a child, now give it back!"

"No, it's mine!"

Kyle laughed. "Okay, okay, now we're both being retarded."

"I think we should be more serious."

"No, cause that'll be boring," Kyle told him, "If we're serious for too long, then we may become emo and grow up old and boring like Kadira."

Stan looked at him. "Kadira, Aaron, and Darius! What happened to them?"

"Oh my god, I'm bleeding, I'm bleeding!" The black blood ran down Kadira's pale face.

Darius sighed. "I don't even wanna know how you drink your weekly blood when you're afraid of it."

"I… I… take it like cough syrup. Squeeze my nose and shut my eyes."

Aaron was wheezing as he lay across the seat. "What the hell did he do to me?"

Kadira looked at him before pointing her bloody hand at herself, healing her injuries and leaving tiny black lines where the cuts the spell had left were. "Oh my. Here, Aaron, let me take off your shirt."

"Wait, can I get some chocolate milk first? That always cheers me up!"(1)

"Should I pull over?"

"No, Darius, and no Aaron!"

"But they dented my ride!" Darius shouted.

Kadira shook her head and undid the buttons on Aaron's shirt. "Dear god."

"What?" Aaron said, "What is it?"

"It is a burn."

Aaron rolled his eyes. "I knew that, Kady, I was wondering why you freaked out."

"I did not freak out. And it is a severe burn."

Darius peeked back from his seat. "Damn. It looks like cavemen discovered fire on your chest, dude!"

"DRIVE!" Kadira yelled at Darius, who turned promptly back to the wheel. "Alright, alright, I think I can heal this."

"You think?"

Kadira rolled her eyes. "I have not treated many burns. Now, I'm going to put you to sleep so you feel no pain."

"She's gonna rape you, man," Darius warned.

"Shut up!" Aaron snapped, "Just do it, Kady."

Kadira nodded and waved her hand over Aaron. "You know, this is the second time I have healed him."

"I'd just let him bleed out."

"Darius!"

"Joking! Did your childhood like really suck or something? Cause you grew up to be a total bitch."

Kadira shook her head irritably and turned back to the now unconscious Aaron. She stopped the bleeding in some parts before working on healing the skin.

"That's frickin nasty," Darius commented.

"I know, but… but…"

"What, you feeling sick? Even your boyfriend's blood disgusts you?"

Kadira glared at him and once again did not answer. The skin had healed up, but there was still a big red area. "That's going to be quite sensitive," she told herself.

"Ooh, poke him and see if he wakes up!" Darius requested.

"Darius, this is not a game."

Darius shrugged. "Hey, what about Stanley and Kyle?"

"Oh yes, Stanley, it is important that we retrieve him."

"What about Kyle?" asked Darius.

"He…" Kadira began, "Well, we can spare him."

Darius squinted, looking at Kadira through the rear view mirror. "What do you have against humans? You've been treating the Kyle kid different than the Stanley one."

"Stanley has powers, Kyle does not. We need people with powers. I didn't even want that boy to come, to be honest."

"I thought you said everyone's equal. And if it wasn't for Kyle, Stanley'd be dead."

Kadira rolled her eyes. "I know, I know, and I do think that humans and vampires are equal. It is just… we are in a war. A war of magic versus darkness. Kyle has neither."

"You know, I was beginning to like the Kyle kid," Darius told her, "Do you think they killed him and Stanley?"

Kadira sighed. "I do hope not. Stanley is our last hope. I believe that they teleported to the wizard headquarters. That is where we are going. To save Stanley." Darius looked at her expectantly. "And his friend," she added irritably.

"Wake Aaron up. I wanna see if it hurts."

"Aaron, wake up," Kadira commanded, waving her hand over him.

He woke up and cried out in pain. "SHIT!"

"Do not try to sit," Kadira told him, pushing him back down, "You will be sore for the next few hours. It takes a while for the inside to heal up."

Aaron groaned. "Then why the hell did you wake me up?"

"We're going to save Stanley and Kyle."

"Oh my god, I'd forgotten, the wizards have Stan!"

Darius rolled his eyes. "And Kyle!"

"Do you think they're gonna give them up easily? If they haven't already… you know."

"I am unsure," Kadira said, "It will be easy to get the human boy. But Stanley has power that they want. I believe that they know about his premature Vamp Ruby ceremony."

Darius sighed. "The wiz HQ is like three days away! And that's driving through the night! I'm tired!"

"I'll drive tomorrow if you drive tonight, Darry."

"Deal," Darius said, nodding.

Kadira looked between them. "When shall I drive?"

"You… drive?"

"I can drive a bit."

"Jesus Christ, no. I'll drive after Aaron. We need to survive if the boys are gonna," Darius said.

Y'all like it? Kind of... 'WHEE', right? I'm giggling my brains out and I don't know why. I really gotta go to the bathroom. It's hot in here. Where's my other shoe? That song is stupid. My cell phone is ringing! eew, it's a stalker, not answering. BATHROOM!

To the tune of Row, Row, Row your boat

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Or you'll make me sad

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