Chapter 21

She saw the big black van and the familiar built of John Diggle open the door to lean down before she pulled over. She was rushing out of her car to the van as Diggle brought out a pale, unconscious Oliver from the back of the van. She locked her car with the remote and wrapped an arm around Oliver's waist.

"What happened?" she asked but instead of answering, Diggle just walked them to the hidden back door. They were downstairs before she got her answer.

"I need your help, he's hurt badly." Diggle said in a rush as they laid Oliver on the metal table at the makeshift medical bay.

"I'm your girl." Felicity replied. "I mean, I'm not your girl. I wasn't making a pass at you." she tried to correct herself.

The entire scene seemed too familiar to Felicity, reminding her of the night Oliver had first revealed himself to her. She grabbed the plastic gloves Diggle handed her and put them on while he took Oliver's leather jacket off. There was a wound on Oliver's shoulder, bleeding profusely. Wordlessly she picked up a gauze and poured some antiseptic over the wound while Diggle went through their medical tools.

"What happened?" she repeated.

"He went after his mother." he replied, fuming through his nostrils. "I told him not to, but earlier today we found some evidence linking his mother to what we discovered as The Undertaking and he wanted to make sure."

"His mother shot him?" she asked, unable to believe her ears. "It's because of me." She looked down at Oliver and ran her hand over his cheek, down to his jaw. His skin was cold under her fingertips but there was still a faint color to his cheeks.

"No." Diggle shouted, placing a hand on her wrist, bringing her back to reality. "I'll tell you more about it, but first, let's bring him back."

They worked together on Oliver's shoulder, taking the bullet out and managing to stop the bleeding. His heart was beating at a normal pace and he hadn't lost too much blood so when Felicity stitched him up, something she was never too comfortable to do so, all they had to do was to wait for him to wake up.

Diggle left Felicity alone with Oliver and went to the car to collect his equipment. She stood next to him, listening to his heartbeat coming from the monitor, steady and strong, and ran her fingers through his hair. She didn't try to decipher the mix of emotions she had been feeling since she received Diggle's call. They had had lunch together and then hours later, he was almost dying again. She still had too many questions, starting with why his own mother shot him, but instead she opted to listen to his heartbeats and then eventually placed her palm on his chest, against his heart and felt the warmth his body was restoring. She sighed and sank on to the stool next to the table.

Her eyes were about to close when she heard the sharp intake of breaths, then the heart monitor beeping loudly. She straightened up and looked at Oliver to see his eyes open, wild and unfocused. He was drenched in sweat and was struggling to breathe properly. He was trembling as he tried to rise in his place. She realized he was having a panic attack and tried placing a hesitant hand on his other shoulder, but he reacted to her touch and pulled himself away.

"Oliver, you're okay, you're having a panic attack." she whispered to him. Ignoring his reaction, she started running her hands through his hair and down to his neck and continued whispering soothing things to him to bring him back, to make sure he felt safe. "Oliver." she chanted his name. He was still breathing with difficulty, but the monitor indicated his heart was coming down to a slower pace. "Oliver, I'm here, you're fine." she told him. "Take a deep breath for five seconds, please, for me." she pleaded. "Now, hold it for two seconds." she asked and Oliver complied. "Now, exhale for five seconds."

It took him a while, but Oliver stopped trembling and was able to take a deep breath on his own. She continued touching him in the softest way, continued whispering things to his ears, urging him to take deep breaths. He turned his head and looked at her, and their eyes met. He was calmer and his eyes were focused. He continued looking at her and she hugged him to herself, started running circles on his back with her fingertips.

"You're fine." she repeated. "Breathe Oliver, breathe."

His heart was beating at a normal pace when she heard the door open, followed by footsteps on the metal stairs. Upon seeing them, Diggle dropped the bag on the floor in a thump and rushed to the table Oliver was on. She hoped he understood what was happening to Oliver, but the confusion on his face confirmed her suspicion that he probably never witnessed Oliver having a panic attack before.

"Oliver, Diggle is here." she whispered, eyeing Diggle. "You're fine, you are at the foundry. You're safe."

Under Diggle's concerned looks, she continued hugging Oliver, wiping away the sweat on his forehead. She was careful with his shoulder, and knew the position they were in was painful for him, but Oliver seemed to ignore the pain and instead wrapped himself closer to her, placing his head against her chest, focusing on his breathing. She placed a soft peck on his forehead, then with one hand, she picked up the gray blanket they had placed under his head and put it on his shoulders.

"You're fine." she reprised. "I'm here, Diggle is here, nobody will hurt you."

With Diggle's help, she laid Oliver down on the table, tucking the blanket to his sides. She caressed his forehead and was happy to find out that he didn't have a fever, an indication that his wound wasn't infected.

"Diggle, do you have some buprenorphine or some sort of a painkiller here? I know Oliver is very careful about what he puts in his body, but it can help him relax a bit."

She cupped Oliver's wrist as Diggle nodded and checked their inventory. He came back with a vial of codeine and a syringe and she administered a minimal dosage. Seconds later, Oliver's eyes closed and he fell asleep.

"What happened?" Diggle asked as they stepped aside, towards where they had the computers. "I wasn't gone for too long."

"He had a panic attack." she answered. "It's not unusual, considering what he probably went through on the island, and what he is still going through. I'm surprised that it didn't happen earlier. I mean he dresses in green leather and chases down criminals with archaic weapons, he clearly was going to react in a psychological way if the physical manifestations are any implication." she rambled. "And he stopped his sessions. I mean, it was my fault, I stopped ours and then he didn't have any progress Professor Alberto so he stopped seeing him, too, and I didn't find him a replacement, then I told him about his mother-"

"Felicity." Diggle stopped her, placing a hand on her shoulder. "It's not your fault. You help him. You've been helping him. He's got better. He no longer kills, he looks for evidence before he takes action." he explained. "He was on an island for five years, he suffered through loss. God knows what else he went through. I've been expecting this any second. I'm just glad you were with him."

She nodded shyly, then looked over to Oliver. He was lying on his good side, his legs drawn up towards his torso. He looked peaceful. She smiled. "I just worry about him." she admitted, feeling shy.

"You're not the only one."

"What happened?" she finally asked. "Why did his mother shoot him? I mean, she doesn't seem like a saint, but I didn't think she'd be into shooting people, especially her own son."

"We've been looking for evidence for days to link his mother to the Undertaking, but Oliver kept denying even the possibility of her involvement. After you talked to him today, we went through phone records." Diggle started. "His mother has been in contact with Malcolm Merlyn."

"Tommy's father."

Diggle nodded. "They are working towards something together, something sinister, but we really don't know what it is yet. So he suited up and went to his mother, to her office, as the Hood, to scare her into telling him the truth, instead she shot him in self-defense."

"Oh my god." she gasped. "His blood might be on the scene." she said, then took out her phone and dialed a number in an urgency. "Yes, my badge number is 6484497-05. The blood sample from the Queen Consolidated crime scene, I need it to be brought to laboratory." she spoke while Diggle gave her a look. "No, you listen to me, you're going to do this now, or you'll need to explain yourself to Detective Lance." she roared. "Ok, thank you."

"What was that?" Diggle asked when she hang up.

"They can do a test on the blood sample and find out it belongs to Oliver. I asked them to take it to the laboratory I have access to." she started and continued before he could cut in. "No, I didn't give out my real badge number, it's a fake. I'll go destroy the sample before they realize that it was fake."

"Let me do that, you stay here with Oliver." he suggested. "I can go in and out without anyone noticing."

"Anyone can notice you, I mean, look at the size of your arms." Felicity said, then realized what she said. "I didn't mean to mean that… I'm sorry. Thanks for offering to go, you can be more discreet than I'll ever be. Regardless of the size of your arms."

"Sure thing, Felicity." Diggle smiled. "I'll be quick. Just tell me what I need to do."

Ten minutes later, she was alone with Oliver at the basement. He was still asleep, still looking peaceful and she was grateful. The monitors showed breaking news about the Hood attacking Moira Queen. The woman who had accused her earlier in the day, who looked menacing in her elegant ways, looked scared and finally fitting to Oliver's description of distressed. She was talking about how the Hood threatened her, how she begged for her life and her children's and how she, in self-defense, aimed and shot the Hood. Felicity winced.

It was strange to see the woman who gave her so much trouble hours ago sounding so scared because of her own son. She wondered what she would do if she knew her assailant was Oliver. She knew Oliver's reasons to go after his mother, she knew his methods of bringing the fear of god into a person to get the information he needed, but he had failed and now he had yet another scar, a new one caused by his mother. The whole event was traumatizing, but knowing Oliver, he would just disregard it and try to make her forget about it, including his panic attack. She needed to make sure he wouldn't.

She walked over to the table Oliver was lying at, only to find him awake and looking at her with a slight smile. "Hey." she said as she cupped his cheek. "How are you feeling?"

"Like I've been shot by my own mother." he replied, his voice groggy. "Where is Diggle?"

"He went to destroy the blood sample found at the scene." she answered as she placed an arm on him to help him sit. "Drink some water." She handed him a bottle. "The bullet didn't get deep, you were lucky."

"Lucky enough to be shot by my mother." he said sarcastically after he emptied the bottle. "Did Diggle call you?"

"Yeah, he asked for my help. I stitched you up and didn't throw up. I've never been good with stitching, ever since that class where we had to stitch cadavers. You'd think a medical degree with those, but I still can't get over that."

He was smiling at him. "Thank you, for being here." he said as he took the blanket off and examined the patch covering his wound. "It hasn't bled through, which means you did a good job."

"I tried." she responded shyly, ignoring the fact that he was half-naked in front of her. "Oliver, you had a panic attack." she mentioned, in an attempt to focus on other things. "Did you ever have one before? I need to know."

He was silent for a moment. "Once, back on the island." he answered. "I didn't realize it as it was happening but then Shado helped me."

"Shado?" she asked. During all of their conversations that involved the island, she had never heard Oliver mention anyone other than himself being there with him on the island.

"When I first got on the island…" he started, looking down. "I was shot by an arrow right after burying my father. Yao Fei, he shot me to help me." He placed a hand on a scar right under his collar bone. "This was the first scar I got."

She remained silent, not trying to react to the fact that Oliver had to bury Robert Queen, her benefactor, his own father. She had assumed, like anyone else, that the man had drowned and his body was somewhere in the depths of the China Sea. She just nodded her head to prompt him to go on. It was the first time Oliver was opening up about the island willingly and she didn't want to interrupt him.

"Yao Fei, he took me to a cave and helped me recover. He was the first one to help me survive. There were mercenaries on the island. He used to work for them, for the mercenaries before I arrived, but then he escaped and he helped me hide from them. They kidnapped his daughter, Shado, to blackmail him into doing things for them, but then he got killed and I stayed with Shado."

The brand new information she was hearing was as shocking as she had expected. Mercenaries, kidnapped daughters… those were things she hadn't thought of when she thought of Oliver on the island. She had imagined hunger and lack of shelter and sanitation, despite the scars on his body that were the proof of hard times, but mercenaries were another story. It made all of her theories even scarier.

"Shado was the one to properly teach me how to use a bow." he continued, his eyes distant. "She was strong and brave, she taught me a lot." Then a slight smile appeared on his face and he looked at her. "You remind me of her, in more ways than I can admit."

She scoffed. "I don't believe that. I can't hold a bow and I'd probably die in a day if I got stranded on an island. I'm too pale to be out in the sun. I'd just get sunburned and then die an agonizing day trying to lift a boulder."

"You are strong." Oliver said, his eyes soft, and held her hand. "You don't realize it."

"What happened to her?" she asked, enjoying the warmth that seemed to radiate from him.

The smile disappeared. "She died." he admitted, getting on his feet.

"I'm sorry to hear that." she offered and squeezed his hand. Their eyes met again. He looked so honest yet so vulnerable and pained that it broke her heart. She wanted to comfort him, she wanted to unburden him, she wanted to share his pain. She was grateful that he had opened up to him, even if it wasn't in full detail. She was tempted to give him another hug when her cell phone started ringing. "Hi John." she answered and listened as he informed her that he was able to destroy the sample. She sighed in relief.

"He got the sample?"

"Yeah, you are out in the clear." she suggested. "I'd better be going. I mean, I could stay, but you are better now and Diggle is on his way back, and I need to go home to shower. I have two sessions early in the morning."

"Thank you Felicity." he said, his voice clear and sincere. He was gazing at her. "I really appreciate this. You saved my life, again."

"Take care, Oliver." She stood before him. "Don't go after your mother, or any of your relatives again." she smiled, then raised herself on her toes and placed a quick kiss on his cheek. "Good night. I'll see you later."

She was gone before she could see Oliver holding his hand on the spot where she kissed him.

A/N: I have only a little over a chapter I need to write before this story is finished, but with grad school going on, it might take a little longer than I wanted. Once I finish, I'll just post everything at once, I think, or weekly.

Many thanks for reading!