I don't own South Park - it's owned by the very talented Trey Parker and Matt Stone.
The Contest
by cell12
Chapter 21
As they stepped into the arcade, the lights and sounds from the dozens of machines bombarded them. It wasn't well lit, the majority of the light coming from the flickering screens. The stench of teen sweat and fast-food breath was thick in the air. Kyle recognised most of the people as the same faces he saw day after day at high school. It didn't matter that they were mostly faces without names, their familiarity was enough to put him at ease.
"Lets get some change," Cartman said guiding Kyle towards the counter, "Anything new?" He asked the cashier as he slipped over a couple of twenty dollar bills.
"Cop Killer Four," answered the cashier in a bored tone, vaguely gesturing towards the far corner. Kyle remembered him as someone who had graduated from high school a couple of years ago.
"Let's go Kahl," Cartman insisted, tugging at his friend, "ah know that it's easy to get distracted here."
"I know him," Kyle glanced over his shoulder at the cashier while Cartman lead him deeper into the arcade, "he got good grades. Why is he here?"
"No scholarship and his mom couldn't afford college. He tried community college but didn't stick it. Now he works here on evenings and weekends," Cartman answered Kyle quickly.
"That sucks," Kyle said.
"That could be Stan in a couple of years time Kahl, if we don't help him," Cartman pointed out, "hell, it could be half our class."
Kyle nodded, slightly shocked, "I never thought about anyone else's future after we graduate, only my own."
"That doesn't make you selfish Kahl, just human," Cartman had found the Cop Killer Four machine and noted the crowd around it, "shit, we'll be waiting over an hour for a turn."
Kyle barely acknowledged the game, "But you did. You came up with a plan to get Stan, Kenny and yourself to college."
"Ah don't want to end up like that cashier guy Kahl," Cartman confessed, "most of my mom's gentlemen friends are just like him - only older. Married with kids before they even knew who they were. Forced into a crappy job that they hate and bores them sick. trapped into a life with no real prospects. That's why so many of the men in this town drink themselves stupid or hook up with my mom. They want to be oblivious for a few hours. They want an exciting sex life, filled with fantasy. They want something that they know they can never have."
"And you want something more for yourself," Kyle looked at Cartman with sympathy.
"Do you blame me Kahl? All ah'll ever be to this town is Cartman the Fat-ass, the bastard son of a whore, the racist and hate-filled kid who treats everyone like shit. Ah've been counting the days until ah can leave this town for years," Cartman sank down, leaning against the machine behind him, "years."
"It's OK Eric, I understand," Kyle tried to console the larger boy.
"No you don't Kahl, not really," Cartman replied, "but that's not your fault. You work hard and your parents support you and push you to succeed. Everything that you achieve, in the future, you'll deserve because you've earned it."
"Sometimes they push me too hard," Kyle said quietly, "sometimes they make me feel so stressed with all the pressure they put on me."
"Ah guess there's more than one way for parents to screw up their kid," Cartman commented as he looked around.
Kyle guessed that Cartman wanted to switch to a lighter topic of conversation, "So should we wait here or try one of the other games."
Cartman raised an eyebrow and looked at His friend, "We didn't come here to play games Kahl," he reminded.
"Oh, right," Kyle said and stepped towards Cartman, initiating a kiss.
Cartman wrapped an arm around Kyle, pulling him closer. He broke off the kiss and whispered to Kyle, "It's working, people are starting to look at us."
Right then, kyle didn't care if the whole world saw him. Being in Cartman's arms felt so right, Kyle wanted the moment to never end. He tilted his head and started grazing on Eric's neck.
"Oh yes," Cartman moaned - taken aback by the contact, "that feels so good."
Kyle sniggered at Cartman's response before he continued, sending a flurry of gentle kisses along Eric's neck and jaw - working his way to the lips.
By now Cartman had stopped people-watching and was giving all his attention to Kyle. He slid a hand slowly down the Jewish boy's back and gripped Kyle's ass. Kyle responded by reaching up and running a hand through Eric's hair, his tongue exploring the fat boy's mouth.
Sadly for Kyle and Eric, noise from around them started to intrude on their moment. They broke apart and Kyle turned to view the crowd of people that had gathered around them.
"So it's true then," Clyde asked. He was wearing his usual red letterman jacket and standing along-side his friends Token, Craig and Tweek.
"If you mean me dating Eric, then yes," Kyle answered. Cartman placed a protective arm around Kyle's waist.
"Arrg, Cartman's brain-washed Kyle!" Tweek shouted, scurrying behind Craig.
Cartman growled and tried to move towards the twitching blonde but Kyle prevented him with a restraining hand on Eric's chest, "No Tweek," Kyle said, "we've been dating in secret for months. We finally decided to out ourselves."
"But why," Token asked, "wouldn't it have been easier to wait until you finished high school?"
"That's what we originally planned," Cartman replied, "but after a friend ah had on-line killed himself, we decided to enter that ghay couples contest to promote ghay teen awareness."
"So your on-line friend was gay?" Token questioned.
"Yes," Cartman answered, "ah met him on the Ghay Teen America website. He had a hard time because his parents were hard-line religious ghay-bashers. He posted a message saying that he was going to kill himself and that was the last time he was on-line."
Cartman appeared distressed and Kyle gripped him and hugged him tightly, before remembering that the on-line friend never existed. "It's OK Eric, I'm here," Kyle said in a soothing voice.
Cartman straightened up and wiped a tear away from his reddening eyes, "There's not much chance of us winning, but if we did the prize money could help with college and stuff."
"I think I've seen the ads for that," Clyde commented, "doesn't the prize include an apartment or something?"
Kyle nodded, "It's a five year lease on an apartment in Denver," he told them, "it would be great to be able to live together while at college."
"It would be so kewl if you guys won," said Craig, noticeably holding Tweek around the shoulders, "there are so many parents who treat gay kids like they've committed a major crime or like they're mentally ill."
"Your dad is pretty homophobic, isn't he Craig," Cartman noted.
"Yeah," Craig answered, not saying any more.
"If you win, it would be a win for gay teens everywhere," Tweek said, pressing closer to Craig and trembling.
"And a win for South Park," Clyde added.
Clyde's words seemed to rouse the competitive spirit of the crowd, with many of them issuing words of support.
"Thank you," Cartman smiled, "if you really want to help - a film crew is coming here tomorrow, for a few days, to film me and Kahl and to interview our parents and friends."
"Don't worry," Token said, "we'll make them feel welcome."
"And tell them what a great couple you are," Clyde added.
Cartman beamed at them, "This means so much to us," he told the crowd, "all of you are so kewl, seriously."
Just then a blonde-haired figure pushed her way through the crowd, it was Bebe and her eyes were fixed on Kyle, "You're gay," she said staring at the Jewish boy.
"Yes," Kyle answered.
"You look really good," she responded with.
"Eric chose my whole new wardrobe," Kyle told her, slightly embarrassed, "I got a hair cut too," he took off his hat to reveal his shorter hair.
"Cartman gave you a make-over," Bebe's eyes travelled all over Kyle, making him feel uncomfortable, "he's done an amazing job."
Kyle crammed his hat back on, "Eric deserves all the credit. He had to talk me into the new look and he paid for everything."
The eyes of everyone in the crowd switched to Cartman.
"You bought Kyle a whole new wardrobe?" Clyde asked, unconvinced.
"Yes," Cartman answered, "ah hadn't been able to get Kyle anything while we were dating in secret, so I went a bit over-the-top."
"Way to set the bar Cartman," Clyde commented, "now everybody's girlfriend will be on at them to spend as much as you. I can just hear them saying, why can't you be more generous like Cartman."
"We're not all shallow like that Clyde," Bebe said angrily.
"Says the girl who only dated me for free shoes," Clyde retorted.
"That was years ago," Bebe responded, "and I've apologised for it many times. I'm not like that any more, I believe that girls should pay their share."
"Like that's ever going to happen," Clyde snapped, "all the girls in this town are leaches and parasites."
No-one was surprised at how bitter Clyde sounded, after the list fiasco he had sworn off dating. Only hooking up with girls at party's and dumping them the next day.
"South Park girls are nice if you give them a chance Clyde," Bebe insisted.
"I've yet to see it," Clyde said cynically.
"I'll prove it to you Clyde," Bebe said, "I'll take you out on a date and pay for everything."
"One date," Clyde responded, "that's just a meaningless gesture."
Cartman stepped in, "Clyde's right," he told Bebe, "date him for a month and share the bills. You both have to buy each other presents as well. At the end of the month Kahl will check all the receipts and decide which of you is right."
"Fine," Clyde said staring at Bebe.
"Fine," she replied accepting the challenge.
Kyle grabbed Cartman's arm and pulled him to one side, "What are you doing Eric?"
"With any luck, getting Bebe off your back for good," Eric answered, looking rather pleased with himself.
"You think her and Clyde will hook up?" Kyle asked.
"Ah doubt that they'll be looking for you in a months time with armfuls of receipts," Cartman told Kyle, "more likely that they'll be so into each other that any talk of a bet will be forgotten."
"Craig and Tweek are dating," noted Kyle, "aren't they?"
Cartman smiled at Kyle and wrapped an arm over his shoulder, "They've been seeing each other in secret for nearly two years."
"How do you know all this?" Kyle asked, stunned.
"Ah told you Kahl," Cartman smirked, "ah know how people think. It's not hard to read the signs."
"You've just manipulated everyone into helping us win the contest and got Clyde and Bebe to date each other," Kyle was slightly awed and slightly disgusted with Cartman's talents.
"Look Kahl," Cartman told his friend, "Craig and Tweek can't come out as a couple themselves but by helping us it makes them feel better about their own relationship. As for Clyde and Bebe, if you told them the truth a month from now, they'd probably thank me."
"But it doesn't make it right," Kyle argued.
"Do you want me to get their bet called off?" Cartman asked, "Do you want Clyde to never be able to trust a girl, for the rest of his life and end up bitter and alone? Do you want Bebe to stalk you and maybe ruin our chances to win the contest?"
"When you put it like that," Kyle conceded.
Cartman interrupted him, pulling him towards the now vacant video game, "C'mon Kahl, it's our turn to play Cop Killer Four."
Kyle was really getting into the game. He had just cleared the level where he had to break into a police lock-up and rescue all your gang members. he had set a 98 percent score, much to the appreciation of the crowd. Not everyone was so friendly though.
"Why are you playing that game queer?" A voice said from the back of the crowd of people around the new game.
The crowd parted to reveal a big well-built guy Kyle vaguely recognised as an ex-football player. Someone who'd been on the team when Kyle was just a freshman. Obviously the guy hadn't been good enough to earn a college scholarship, but he was still mean-looking and apparently spoiling for a fight.
"Do you have a problem with me?" Kyle asked politely.
"A faggot like you shouldn't be playing a violent game like that. You should be playing one of those girly games with unicorns, princesses and rainbows," the guy answered with a sneer.
Both Kyle and Cartman stood up and Cartman tried to move in front of Kyle to protect him. Kyle placed a hand on the larger boy, to hold him back.
"You seen to know a lot about girly games," Kyle commented. Some of the crowd laughed.
This did it for the thug, he charged at Kyle swinging a large fist. Kyle casually tilted his body to dodge the blow before slamming the heel of his hand, hard, into the meat-head's nose. The sickening crunch of bone could be heard above the sounds of arcade machines and background chatter. Kyle followed it with a knee into the stomach before stepping back. The guy was now rolling around on the floor, in pain.
Kyle raised a foot, as if to kick the rolling mass, but didn't - instead he leant over and stated, "Six years of martial arts training, bitch."
All the crowd were clapping and cheering as Cartman pulled Kyle into a hug.
Authors Note: Firstly, apology's for the longer than usual wait for this chapter. I've had a chest infection and it tends to trigger my asthma if I push myself. Also my laptop crashed, just as I was about to start typing (I've only had it since Christmas last year, 8 months), so I've had to type this up on my 4 year old laptop with the crappy keyboard. You can imagine how annoying this has all been.
On a brighter note this is the longest chapter yet. I don't know why the chapters seem to be getting longer, it's not deliberate or anything (lol).
Some of you may not like the video game Eric and Kyle were playing at the arcade. Yes I made the name up and yes I know it's slightly controversial. In a world filled with games like Saints Row and GTA, where killing the police and civilians is a part of the game. Is it so hard to imagine a video game publisher using a name like Cop Killer, just for the massive amount of negative press it would generate. Remember, the more offended the right-wing press gets the more kewl a game becomes to some people. Think back to the first Mortal Combat game, average game play but with photo-realistic characters and gruesome finishing moves. It got a lot of press and subsequently big sales. Please bare in mind that I have nothing but respect for law enforcement officers the world over, they do a dangerous job and get little gratitude in return.
I also introduced two more pairings in this story, Craig/Tweek and Clyde/Bebe. Don't worry they are just mentioned in passing and this story's main focus will always be on Cartman and Kyle. So if you dislike either of those pairings, sorry.
Kyman love to you all, cell12.
P.S. Is the Kyman love thing catching on with anyone? I've been saying it to family and friends, who now think I'm weird (lol). Kyman hugs and kisses too, cell12.