Back in the hut, Kagome was holding a hand of five cards. InuYasha was holding a similar hand. Kagome said "I'll raise you on this." InuYasha replied "you're on. What have you got?" Kagome said "four of a kind. Read it and--." "Straight flush" InuYasha said. When InuYasha laid his cards down, Kagome saw that he was right: a two, three, four, five, and six of spades. "I guess that beats my four eights" Kagome said. Just then, Sesshomaru entered. InuYasha's eyes bugged out until Sesshomaru asked "Have either of you ladies seen a half-demon around here? Red Kimono, named InuYasha?" InuYasha, faking a female voice, said "yeah, he made off with my gold. He went that way." InuYasha pointed outside into the woods. Kagome said "well, he did look a little dreamy." InuYasha said "oh, you. You're always such a man-izer." As they giggled (InuYasha in a female tone), Sesshomaru said "I give you my thanks, ladies." He promptly left, saying "come, Jaken." Jaken replied "yes, me lord." Jaken thought that the one white-haired woman looked a little familiar, but dismissed the thought with "that's impossible; InuYasha doesn't have knockers."
Later, the sun had set. Kagome had just won another poker hand when InuYasha suddenly transformed into human form. Kagome looked at him and said "wow, now you do look like a woman." She held up a mirror and InuYasha looked for himself. "Holy crap, I do look like a woman" he said. Sango entered and was amazed by how InuYasha looked. "I think we're ready to take on that monk now" she said. Kagome said "okay, InuYasha, you'll be posing as a lady named Sora." InuYasha said "okay" despite shuddering a little. Kagome said "are you okay, InuYasha?" Figuring it out, Kagome said "I suppose it's the kiss that might happen." InuYasha replied "very smart, Sherlock." Kagome simply mimed holding a smoking pipe and said in a British accent "interesting; very interesting."
Later, outside the village, Miroku was waiting. "How lonely could this woman be?" he wondered. In the foliage behind him, Kagome, Sango, and InuYasha appeared. "Okay, hot lips, you're on" Kagome said. InuYasha walked out to Miroku. "Are you the fabled monk whose company I'll have tonight?" he asked in a falsetto voice. Miroku looked and saw who he thought was the most gorgeous woman he'd ever seen. His eyes were bugging out. "I am the monk you seek, miss" he replied. InuYasha came closer, and Miroku began his antics. "Tell me what's on your mind, my dear maiden" he said. InuYasha retained the convincing falsetto in his reply of "just you and me, dear monk." Kagome and Sango were trying hard not to laugh. Miroku said "I have a request for you, miss…uhh." InuYasha said "my name is Sora. I heard from a friend that yours is Miroku." Miroku said "your friend is very knowledgeable." He continued with "well, my request is for you to have my children." Kagome and Sango rolled their eyes. "Typical" Kagome thought. InuYasha said "I'd be glad to take you up that request." Kagome and Sango were shocked. "This isn't how we planned it" Kagome murmured. "I thought you guys rehearsed this" Sango said. Kagome replied "well, I didn't factor in the request." Miroku was overjoyed. "I'm glad to hear that, Sora" he said. Sango said "oh, man, this is getting out of hand, Kagome." Miroku gazed into InuYasha's (or rather, Sora's) eyes and said "your eyes are of the prettiest shade of brown. They remind me of those of a good half-demon friend of mine." InuYasha thought "oh, crap." Miroku said "his name's Inu--." "I think I've met that guy before" InuYasha said, "he seemed caring enough, but there's something about him that kind of gets to me. I do imagine his sword's capabilities to be awesome. I hear he can wipe out 100 demons in a single swing." Miroku said "yeah, but how did you hear about this?" InuYasha said "he told me so in bed last night."
Kagome said "what is he doing? This isn't what we planned at all." Sango replied "I don't know, but it's getting funnier and funnier." Kagome, creeped out by InuYasha's comment, said "I mentioned nothing about having slept with his alias the preceding night." Sango cringed and said "that's true." Miroku was continuing to gaze into Sora's (InuYasha's) eyes. "I promise you'll get better than what InuYasha could offer" he said. Sango cringed, big time. Kagome whimpered a little and thought "I can't believe how off-course this is going." Miroku kept gazing and drifting closer. InuYasha thought to himself "okay, just close your eyes and pretend you're with Kagome." Their lips met, and Miroku felt light as a feather. InuYasha, on the other hand, felt heavier than a block of steel. He thought he was going to throw up. Sango and Kagome saw Miroku add a butt rubbing to this kiss. Kagome thought "this isn't going too well."
After the kiss, Miroku said "Sora, my love, my heart is aflutter." InuYasha, having thankfully lost the vomiting urge, said "so is mine." Miroku asked "another kiss?" InuYasha said "sure, but I first have something I want to show you." He rubbed one of the water pouches in a convincingly sensual manner. Kagome was not exactly comforted by that. "InuYasha, I can't believe you're doing this" she thought. Sango was about to flip out, herself. "InuYasha, you're not supposed to be tempting him" she thought, "InuYasha needs to get out of there, now." Miroku was getting very excited. "What is it you want to show me, Sora?" he asked. InuYasha replied "I just want to say that I kind of like you. You're handsome, fun, and…" he removed the gold necklace of Kagome's and resumed his normal voice with "…so easy!" Miroku jumped back and yelled "INUYASHA!" Kagome and Sango came out of the foliage laughing their heads off. Sango said "you're such a sucker, Miroku." She unloaded some sarcasm with "I can't believe you fell for that." Miroku gawked at all three of them and asked "why did you do this to me?" Kagome said "if you weren't such a womanizer, you wouldn't have fallen into this." Miroku said "that was still uncalled for, especially from you, InuYasha. I can't believe I fucking kissed you! I also gave you a rump rub!" InuYasha asked "you still want me to bear you a son?" All three of them were laughing at that point. Miroku flinched and yelled "HELL NO!" Sango said "you ready to give up womanizing permanently, now?" Miroku said "I think I'll actually start checking things out before making any moves." Sango thought "he's still going to go at it." InuYasha resumed the falsetto voice and said "I guess you're lucky to have found this lady" as he stroked a finger across Miroku's shoulders. Sango and Kagome were laughing even more.
The ticked monk was quivering as he said "InuYasha, stop. That's enough. I'm going to kick the crap out of you!" InuYasha resumed his normal voice and said "sure." Miroku hit InuYasha in the face with his staff. Soon, a massive fight broke out. Shippo woke up with the commotion and saw the fight. Before Kagome and Sango could intervene, they heard Shippo start chanting "fight, fight, fight, fight…" Kagome said "Shippo, you're not helping." Shippo said "sorry, couldn't resist." With that, Kagome and Sango turned their attention back to the fighting pair. InuYasha yelped out in a soprano tone "oh, not the tenders." Sango went over and yelled "knock it off, you two!" She was unfortunately hit with some crossfire and sent sailing aside. Kagome held her (aluminum) bow and arrow ready to fire, saying "stop fighting or I'll shoot!" Miroku instantly froze and looked at Kagome. InuYasha said "thank you" as he scurried away. Kagome grabbed him before he had a chance to get lost. "You're not going anywhere, InuYasha" she said. InuYasha said "dang." Sango said "you need to behave yourself, monk." Miroku asked "what'd I do?" Kagome barked "you were beating the crap out of InuYasha again." Miroku said "well, you need to keep man-she on a leash." Kagome said "it was actually my idea as well as Sango's." "'Man-she'?" InuYasha asked through gritted teeth. Miroku, shocked, asked "what? Why would you do such a thing?" Sango replied "as we said before, if you weren't such a womanizer, you wouldn't have fallen for that."