author's notes: special thanks to my beta Inwenalas.

characters: June (OC), Nick Warbler, Thad Warbler, Sebastian, Trent Warbler, Blaine, Jeff Warbler

CHAPTER SUMMARY: June apologizes to Sebastian for ignoring him for so long, and the Warblers head to Nationals.

BUT YOUR WORDS ARE LIKE WEAPONS;;

chapter twenty-one

She's only ever seen Dalton on the inside that time the Warblers invited the New Directions so they could show off their Michael Jackson moves. Sebastian had sung them I Want You Back, shamelessly flirting with an almost helpless Blaine. She'd been impressed by Sebastian's dance moves, his candid openness towards Blaine, and could even forgive the blatant flirting in front of Kurt – Blaine would never have given in, his relationship with Kurt far too important to him, and she thought it brave of Sebastian to keep going with Kurt just about ready to start strangling him.

She remembers the conversation she had with Blaine after the first Jackson-off, about him being so affected by Sebastian, only they both knew that what he had with Kurt was deeper and more real than anything he could have with Sebastian. Maybe she's wrong to expect that from Sebastian now, to think he's changed or expect more because she knows him better. But then deep down she knows both her and Blaine had misjudged him from the start. Not that Sebastian didn't have a hand in that himself.

They've all come a long way: Sebastian had seen the error of his ways, Blaine had gotten over whatever it was he felt for Sebastian, and she, well, she'd fallen in love with someone who wasn't only – firstly – a guy, but a gay guy who seemed to like her back.

A guy she hadn't been treating fair at all. That's why she finds herself roaming the hallways of Dalton now. She needs to apologize to Sebastian for ignoring him for so long. She'd gotten caught up in the intricacies of her own life, which were admittedly thought-consuming, but somehow she'd forgotten Sebastian had become a big part of that life as well.

It's been almost three weeks, finals are over and even at Dalton a strange rest has fallen over everyone.

The only thing that remains unchanged is the dulcet sounds of a dozen or so male voices accompanying Dalton life like background music. The Warblers were undoubtedly still practising hard for Nationals, which was only two weeks away. But when she finds the Warblers in their usual haunt, the common room, Sebastian's nowhere in sight, and the rest of them are just riffing random lines.

They fall silent once they spot her.

June puts her hands up in surrender. "I'm not here to spy."

This gets a laugh or a smile out of most of them. She's not exactly their competition anymore.

"Sebastian's in the library," Nick says.

June wonders how many of them realize that she's there to see Sebastian—she's fairly certain he doesn't talk to them about her, but they can't be completely ignorant about some of the things going on between them. Unless he hides whatever feelings he does have for her as well from them as he does from her. What if he doesn't cherish any feelings for her at all?

"Thanks," June says, hoping to distract herself from her thoughts. She'd promised Sebastian time and space to process everything; she'd respect that.

She hesitates in the doorway. "Have you guys ever considered doing original songs?" she asks.

Eyes all across the room go wide in surprise, and she can tell more than one of them considers it.

"We couldn't possibly!" Thad exclaims, which leads to someone else shouting "Yes, we can!" until they're all talking at once.

June smiles to herself: it's nice to know that at the end of the day most Glee clubs are somewhat the same.

She leaves the Warblers to their discussion and sets out to look for Sebastian. She's surprised he hasn't shown up on Blaine's doorstep yet, but maybe that's exactly the kind of wishful thinking she has to give up—he told her he needed time, and she knows there's a possibility that he'll turn her down, so why should she expect even more from him? But she knows the answer to that question. She expects more because he's shown her more, he contacted her brother, wrote that beautiful email. She's stopped doubting his care for her—but what about his heart?

As she was informed, Sebastian's in the library, otherwise completely empty, seated at a table filled with songbooks. June figures the Warblers are still trying to settle on their song choices. No wonder the mention of original songs somewhat freaked them out.

Sebastian doesn't notice her until she places two cups of Lima Bean coffee on the table, sliding the one with the shot of Courvoisier towards him across the table.

"Hey," he breathes out in his surprise, sits up straighter, eyes following her until she's sat down.

He can hardly believe she's here—there's some part of him that thought it was really her turn to make a concession, she's the one that should step up and make an effort this time around, only after everything she's been through he's just happy to see her standing.

"You look terrible," he still jokes, because that's what they do. He doesn't know how to do this, how to talk to her with all this extra baggage between them—except that makes it sound like a burden and it shouldn't be. He should've learned how to communicate these kinds of feelings a long time ago, but he was never taught how to. He hopes she knows that, that she's clever enough to read his jokes for what they are.

Only he's not sure he knows what they are.

"Good," June says. "Because I still feel terrible half the time."

His anger hasn't dissipated, he still gets shaky when he thinks about June's parents and how they threw her out as if she was something disposable. It still makes him sick to his stomach thinking about how June must have felt, having her worst nightmares come true.

He can't help but wonder why she's here though, why she came all the way to Dalton to find him. It can't just be to bring him coffee or to catch up. She doesn't need him like she needs Blaine, he thinks, and he doesn't want her to apologize. So, why?

It only hits him then. Did her brother come? Did he show her the email?

"Living with Blaine can't be beneficial for you," he says before June gets the chance to. He doesn't want her gratitude, not for something that should've been self-evident—John was her brother and he went through the same thing—he might be the only one who can really get her through this. Surely Blaine realized this too. There's a reason he'd asked John to keep quiet about his involvement; it shouldn't be what convinces June he actually cares.

He hopes she already knows that.

"Living with Blaine suits me just fine," June says and he averts his eyes. He hates how he can see it in her eyes, something new and loving, and he wonders if maybe he just never noticed it before. After all, she fell in love with him in Paris and it took him quite a bit longer to realize his own feelings. But he thinks he knows now.

"I mean—" he starts, planning to fall back into one of their familiar patterns, but then June's hand settles down on his, no doubt in an attempt to silence him.

It works.

"Sebastian," June says.

"You don't have to—" He shakes his head, voice trailing off. She has to know, he thinks, there's little he wouldn't do for her now. Maybe it's time he tells her that.

"I know we don't do this," June says. He finds her eyes again, "but thank you."

He feels a smile tug at the corner of his mouth. "He came then?" he asks, feeling a sense of pride over his accomplishment. He stares down at their hands, still touching, and runs his thumb over June's skin. No, he's really not for all the schmoopiness, but he's sure he can learn to appreciate it. He imagines there's a lot of things he still has to learn.

"With his boyfriend."

He chuckles. He wants to tease with a subtle 'your parents would love that,' but he's not sure what the mention of her parents will do. "I told him not to tell you," he says instead.

June shrugs. "It wasn't hard to figure out," she lies. She hasn't exactly figured out why Sebastian didn't want her to know. She's fairly certain she's not that obnoxious, and it was one of the most meaningful things anyone had ever done for her. It showed her he cared. But deep down she thinks she already knew that.

The chatter of male voices fills up the hallway and the Warblers pour into the common room.

Sebastian pulls back his hand.

He doesn't know why.

"Sebastian," Trent's the one to speak for everyone. "We've been thinking," he says. "June suggested we might do original songs for Nationals."

Sebastian looks at June, eyebrows pulling up in surprise. "Did she now?"

June shrugs apologetically, attempting to hide behind her cup of coffee.

"We're up against a lot of great show choirs," Trent says. "Most of them are mixed groups. Including Vocal Adrenaline. We need a bigger advantage."

Every Warbler in the room – except for Sebastian – puts on his best puppy dog look. June can barely stifle a smile.

"All of you agree on this?" Sebastian asks.

The whole group nods fast.

If at all possible, June's eyes spell out 'oops' when Sebastian looks at her again.

He smiles, then nods. "Then in true Warbler fashion, it will be so."

June thinks it's remarkable how much Sebastian has changed these past two years. He transferred to Dalton and took control of the Warblers, thinking he'd make them do what he wanted and lead them to a Nationals victory. But that had proved difficult, and the boy who was used to getting what he wanted was taken down a notch or two.

But he'd learned and won back their respect, and now he was more than just their leader. He was their friend.

"If you were only interested in me just so you could stage a coup you could've just said," Sebastian says once the Warblers have left again.

June smiles, chin resting in the palm of her hand. "But where would've been the fun in that?" she says, happy to know she hasn't ruined anything between them by ignoring him all this time.

They both laugh, and it feels freeing, to just laugh and joke around and forget about all the seriousness in her life for a few moments, but she still wants to say what she came here to say. He deserves that much from her. Especially after what he did. "I'm sorry I avoided you."

"Don't be," Sebastian answers, and somehow makes it sound both playful and serious. "I wouldn't want me around either."

"That wasn't it," June says, and wonders exactly how much she'd hurt Sebastian by cutting him out of her life. But it wasn't his fault, not because she thought he wouldn't want to be there for her or he'd be emotionally unavailable—if he'd been there instead of Blaine she would've clung to him too. But would she have still called Blaine as well? She can't imagine a scenario without Blaine by her side. It doesn't matter. "I guess I just didn't want you to see me like that. Or like this."

Sebastian frowns.

This is it, he thinks, this is how a relationship will change things, she'll hide whatever she doesn't want him to see so as not to scare him away, but he won't stand for that. If he's going to do this he wants all of her, the good and the bad and everything in between. He still hasn't defined it, these feelings he has for her, but maybe that doesn't really matter. Not yet. They've both already thrown the labels overboard.

"I was joking," he says, regretting his previous cavalier statement. "You look fine."

"Liar." June chuckles. She knows she looks how she feels; she's still not sleeping very well, constant worry keeping her awake at night, the future somehow more uncertain than it was before. Sure, she'd thought past this point, she wanted to head to college more than anything, but then what? She'll need to get a job to pay for things her scholarship doesn't cover and somehow combine that with trying to get a college degree. She knows she can do it, but the rampant thoughts still prevent her from sleeping.

"How did you find out?" June asks. She doesn't think Blaine told him, in fact, Blaine had seemed content that for once there was no mention of Sebastian in their lives—something tells her that changed once he read the email.

"I went by your house," Sebastian answers, and almost adds 'at Belle's request', but it was his idea before it was his sister's. He had to talk to her, he had to see her—he couldn't take the silence. "I almost punched your dad."

June smiles at him. "My hero," she says, and damn, he thinks, she's already back to flirting with him. This has to be a good sign. She's strong, she'll be okay.

"I'm really sorry about what happened," he blurts out, because he needs her to know, without a doubt, that it's more than just anger that drove him to write that email. By the time he'd finally found John's email address it was 2 in the morning and all he could think of was how badly he needed her brother to hear him.

June casts down her eyes.

Now he's done it.

"It wasn't your fault," she says without looking up at him.

And there it is again. She's hiding from him, like she once did in Rome, like she's been doing for three whole weeks. She pulls back whenever it suits her or whenever she thinks he couldn't be bothered, or when she feels shame over something her parents instilled her with. He wonders if she ever does that in front of Blaine. He wonders if it's possible that he's jealous of what Blaine has with her, something far less complicated than what he told her he'd figure out.

"Hey, if they can't see what a great—person you are," he almost trips over his words – just like her it doesn't happen to him too often, "then—then they don't deserve to have you around."

June looks up at him again, and smiles, not poking fun or teasing, just accepting his words. He clears his throat. How does he tell her this? How should he tell he just wants to take the plunge, dive head first into something that could end up badly? He doesn't know the words to say it, and June's speaking again before he manages to figure them out.

"I have to go," she says. "Dinner with the Andersons." She gets up from her seat. "I'll see you around?"

He doesn't grin like he usually would, he doesn't even smile. He has a lot to think about. "You bet," he answers.

#

He's on his third cup of coffee of the morning by the time he sees June enter the Lima Bean. The Warblers have been working on their original songs day in day out for an entire week and he's completely pumped—he's a mixture of nerves and stress and excitement. It's exhilarating, really, the rush leading up to a competition, the initial chaos slowly making its way into something more coherent, a whole, until their musical numbers reached perfection.

He thinks it's because the caffeine is making him more alert and aware of his surroundings that his eyes follow June across the room, studying her from behind while she waits in line, checking her phone, brushing back her bangs, slouching—she can so easily be mistaken for an average teenage girl, worried about boys and make-up—no one would think she'd gone through such horrors the past few weeks.

There's a huge part of him that wants to protect her from all that, from her parents and people like them, from heartache and pain. Is that what being in love feels like? Or is that only caring? Is there a difference?

"Good morning, Mr Smythe," June says as soon as she makes her way over, and settles down at his table without waiting for an invitation.

He grins, probably wider than he ever has. "Miss June."

He looks around the coffee shop. "And where is Mr Anderson?" he asks, but he realizes the answer is 'Kurt' before June has to say it. He never honestly believed Blaine and Kurt would last very long, both far too naïve to keep a relationship alive, but then what does he know? Maybe there's more to both of them than he gives them credit for. Maybe there's hope for him and June. "They're going to be bored with each other before they even live together."

"I don't know." June shrugs. "From what I hear New York's a pretty exciting city."

"I suppose you'll find out soon enough." He smiles, even though the thought of her being so far away very soon makes him sad all of a sudden. "Why aren't you with your brother?" he asks to keep the thoughts at bay. He shakes his head, blinks, almost literally feeling the caffeine rush to his head.

"How many of these have you had?" June asks and points at the three empty coffee cups on the table. Nationals are only a week away and he really needs his focus. The original songs the Warblers wrote are amazing, but he's going to keep practicing until the very last minute.

"Enough," he answers, but he's already planning a fourth.

"John went back home," June says. "He's a teacher, there's only so many days he could take off."

There's a short silence, a comfortable one, June still checking her phone and he just stares at her. He wants to try this, a relationship, with the only girl he's ever been this comfortable with, the only girl he's ever had feelings for—and he'll tell her. After Nationals.

"How far do you reckon Harvard is from Columbia?" he asks, blurts it out because it's been right at the tip of his tongue since she walked through the door. Since he got the letter, really.

June looks up, her eyes narrowing on his face. "Probably a few hours," she answers. "Why?"

"208 miles," Sebastian says, and can't control the smile that breaks out across his face.

"You got into Harvard!" June realizes, and her eyes go wide, her smile lighting up her eyes. "Oh my God, Sebastian, congratulations!"

Sebastian shrugs but can't contain the corners of his mouth; it's not really that big a deal—his grades and his father's influence had pretty much assured him a spot since birth—but June's enthusiasm about college in general had encouraged some excitement of his own. After all, birth right or not, he'd be far away from his father and his stepmother. This is sort of a new start for him too. Maybe that's why it feels so right now, they're both starting anew somewhere else, far from anyone's prying eyes, if you didn't count Blaine or Kurt. Or Rachel.

"You're going through with it then?" June asks. "Doing what your father wants you to do?"

"Doesn't sound like me, does it?" he says, and grins. "I don't know what else I'd do. Might as well do something right."

June can tell it makes him sad, not knowing what he wants from the future, but she doesn't pursue it because it seems too serious a topic when all she wants to do is be happy for him. "208 miles, hu?" she asks. That's quite a distance for two people who don't even know what's going on between them.

"Not completely insurmountable," Sebastian says, knowing he's implying so much more. Even if they won't pursue a relationship he still wants her in his life. Is that selfish?

June giggles. "Maybe we could find a coffee shop in the middle."

#

The Warblers draw last position at Nationals, which makes more than one of them jumpy. June has figured out that the uniforms work deceiving—it makes them appear united and composed, but it's like she realized at Dalton two weeks ago: all Glee clubs are the same. So naturally their nerves were the same too. The school provides a bus with all the luxuries to get them to Chicago, and somehow Sebastian manages to convince the administrations office to take Blaine and June with them—June suspects it has something to do with his father's influence.

But the bus ride is completely silent. There's hushed whispers now and again but it seems they're all sparing their vocal cords until they've reached their destination. Blaine's nervously rubbing his hands together the whole time and even June has to admit some excited nerves are keeping her quiet as well.

So they all sit in silence, staring out the window, listening to the bus' engines roar, some nervous laughter here or there.

"Why are you shaking?" Blaine asks as Vocal Adrenaline leaves the stage. The Warblers are up next, the very last performers of the day. "You're not even performing."

"Are you telling me you're not the least bit nervous?" June says. "You can't fool me, I know you still love these guys."

Blaine chuckles. "I can't believe they're doing original songs," he says, almost bouncing in his seat.

"Breathe, Obi-Wan. All will be well."

But they have little to worry about. The other choirs were good, they were really good, but the Warblers are magnificent. The thought and care they put into their original lyrics, vocals, background vocals and harmonies, combined with their usual impeccable choreography makes for three show stoppers that has the audience out of their seats the moment Sebastian hits the first chorus. June's always loved watching Sebastian perform, there's something entirely unguarded about him on a stage, singing, dancing, he doesn't hold back or hide—he loves this, it makes him happy, and it shows.

June and Blaine find the Warblers in the main hall after the competition, huddled close together, discussing their performance. Trent walks straight up to Blaine. "What did you think?" he asks, eyes wide in terror.

"Were we good enough?" Nick joins him, then stares at the ground as he shakes his head. "I totally messed up one of the moves in the second number."

"I'm going to be sick," another Warbler says.

"Guys, relax," Blaine hushes, and all the Warblers turn to him. It's very clear they still value his opinion greatly, because he gets all of them to listen at once. "You gave it everything you had. Now all you can do is wait for the result."

"Blaine's right," Sebastian chimes in, all heads turning to look at him – they look to him as their leader. "We're here. We rocked," he says. "Whatever happens, we did it as a team and we had fun."

Jeff leans an arm up Sebastian's shoulder. "Though winning would sure be nice, wouldn't it, Bas?" he says, and raises his fist.

Sebastian laughs and bumps his own fist against Jeff's. "So true."

He looks up and searches for June, but she and Blaine are not hard to find in the flurry of blue blazers. She seems happy, laughing and chatting with Blaine and Nick—he's grateful she's able to forget from time to time, to just be with friends and not remember what her parents did, what he's yet to tell her or any other worries that might keep her up at night.

They lock eyes and she smiles at him—he can't but smile back. She says something to Blaine, he nods, and she wanders over to him. "That was very democratic of you—Bas," June says, both of them now standing out of earshot of all the other Warblers.

"Please, don't call me that." Sebastian almost visibly cringes. "I'm going to be ecstatic once Belle starts saying my name in full."

"No nicknames then?" June teases and looks up at him. "Bas, Seb—Sebby?"

Something in Sebastian's eyes mellows as he looks down at her, and June feels something in the pit of her stomach melt. She's not sure how much longer she can take this uncertainty between them—before long not-knowing is going to start hurting too. And if he decides it won't work, it's probably best if they don't see each other for a while. 208 miles is probably far enough for heartbreak to heal.

"Sebastian works just fine," he answers, shaking June back to reality.

"Are you nervous?" June asks, watching Sebastian shift his weight from one foot to the other.

"Hell yeah, I'm nervous," he says. "Forget about being democratic, I want to win. Or at least place in the top three."

It's another hour before the judges release the ranking. The main hall is filled with most of the show choirs that performed and their audience. By the time the list is placed at the entrance of the auditorium a crowd has gathered around the bulletin board, making it impossible for any of the Warblers to get to the front. They hear cheers and sighs of disappointment, but so far they haven't heard from any winners.

In the end Sebastian orders Thad to weave through the crowd because he's the shortest.

"I can't stand this," Blaine complains, standing next to June behind the Warblers—it's their competition and they don't want to get in the way.

It takes Thad a full ten minutes to check the rankings and push his way back through the crowd. He resurfaces slowly, comes up to them, head bowed solemnly. Blaine and June feel their hearts sink to their stomachs—the Warblers react much the same way, a collective sigh spreading through the group.

Only then Thad throws up his arms.

"We placed second!" he screams, attracting attention from the entire hall, but he doesn't care. All his friends look up, confused at first, because for a split second there they'd resigned themselves to defeat.

"What?" Sebastian asks.

Thad beams. "We placed second, man."

"You—" Sebastian crunches his nose and grabs Thad in a headlock, but the joy in his face is unmistakable. They did it, he thinks, they actually did it. He succeeded where everyone, including some of his fellow Warblers and his father, thought he'd fail. But he showed them. He was wrong last year, resorting to tactics unbefitting the school, the Warblers or even himself. It's been so long since something he's worked so hard for has paid off.

The Warblers are cheering around him, jumping up and down, hugging and shaking hands and shouting at each other. He searches for June in the crowd again—she's hugging Blaine and smiling, and it's only then that he feels his own face has broken out in a huge smile, his heart beating fast in his chest. This is it, as confident as he'll ever be, as certain as he'll ever be about anything—it's remarkable how much clarity performing grants him time and time again, and he thinks maybe he's destined to do this forever. Maybe that's his dream.

June lets go of Blaine and Blaine moves on to congratulating his former team, and his heart rejoices when June's first thought is looking for him in the crowd too. She's beaming at him, much like he is at her, and it pulls him closer, closer, until the distance between them is no longer and he's thrown his arms around her in a moment of complete surrender.

"Congrats, Smythe." There's the sound of a smile in her voice. "I'm proud of you."

It's only then that he realizes they've never hugged before. They've kissed, twice, but somehow a hug feels so much more intimate. He pulls back, as does June, probably thinking the same thing. But he stares down at her, not relinquishing an inch of space between them and he can't bring himself to release her eyes.

This is it, Sebastian thinks, what's holding him back now? Then again, what was holding him back before? It's fear, there's some part of him that thinks he'll mess up and hurt her and lose her completely. That's what people expect from him, his father mostly, but he knows Blaine thinks it too, that he'll screw up, that he doesn't deserve her. And people's expectations have become his deepest fears, the things that pull him back, the things that make him hurt people—somewhere, at some point, it's other people that turned him self-destructive.

Maybe he shouldn't tell June, maybe he shouldn't even bother trying if it's already doomed, but the fact that she has feelings for him, that she's in love with him, that has to mean something. Maybe that'll be strong enough for him to overcome his fears. All he wants is make her happy and keep her safe, let her in like he's been doing all along. Because he knows now. He is in love with her.

"Are you sure this is what you want?" Sebastian asks, and he can't figure out why he's already giving her an out. He stares down into June's eyes, the distance between them minimal, her lips only inches away from his. Yes, this is what he wants, even if it's doomed to fail, even if it doesn't work, they owe it to themselves to try.

June nods almost imperceptibly. "Yes," she breathes.

And that's all he needs to hear.

He draws a hand up to the back of her neck, the other at her waist, but whatever chaotic urge that had controlled him all the other times slows him down now. He bumps his nose against hers, she breathes in sharply and parts her lips for him, and then he presses an open-mouthed kiss to her lips, feeling her entire body melt against his, her hands clutching at his blazer at the small of his back.

He kisses her slow and deep, tongue gaining lazy access to her mouth and he savors it, every taste and flicker of her tongue, every little sound she makes, every curve of her tangible against his body, new and unfamiliar territory in every possible way.

She's sure she's flying, it's the only thing that explains the feeling of complete weightlessness right now. Somehow her heart manages to stay calm, even though her skin's warm, flushing in all the places Sebastian's touching her and she can feel him, all solid and flat chest and hot tongue. She's been kissed like this before, controlled and slow, deliberate, but it's still different every time—it's exciting and flammable and such an incredible turn-on. And the first time with a boy.

It's only when Sebastian breaks away, staring down into her eyes again and smiling, both of them breathless, that her surroundings come into play again. She doesn't know if Sebastian meant to prove something to her, show her that he's not embarrassed to be seen with her. All the Warblers and Blaine are staring at them and all he has eyes for is her.

She smiles shyly and bites her lip. "Everyone's staring at us."

Sebastian runs a thumb over her lip, effectively freeing it from her teeth. "I don't care," he says, and presses another kiss to her lips.

#

Blaine doesn't know why, but he's angry. There's a big part of him that fears for June and what she's getting herself into with Sebastian. He knows her feelings for him have been there a long while, long before her parents kicked her out and drew this new wound across her heart, but he can't help but think she's throwing herself into a relationship with Sebastian just because she needs something in her life she feels is missing. He shouldn't think it, but he's afraid June's just grasping onto the first thing she saw without thinking about the consequences.

And Sebastian's only making it worse. It makes him feel like the worst friend in the world, thinking June can't take care of herself, isn't strong enough to handle everything life's dealt her. He's long since realized that when it comes to Sebastian, there'll always be mixed feelings.

"Are you sure you know what you're doing?" Blaine asks, looking back at June sleeping in the seat behind him. They're back on the bus on their way home.

Sebastian follows Blaine's gaze. "I think for the first time in my life I have no idea what I'm doing, killer," he answers, and Blaine's shocked to hear the sincerity in his voice.

Does Sebastian love her? He already knew he liked her, they'd had that conversation months ago, but that didn't mean he was in love. June had given him time and space and to be honest, Blaine had already given up on granting Sebastian the benefit of the doubt.

But then there was that email, which showed such care, maybe love even. He wonders if his reluctance to accept Sebastian in June's life has something to do with the feelings he once cherished for Sebastian. Are those feelings really gone? Does some primal urge in him want Sebastian for himself?

No, Blaine thinks, he just doesn't want to see June get her heart broken. He wants her to be happy. But is Sebastian really the guy to give her happiness? Can he commit to a relationship with her when he has no experience? Something like that can never last. Then again, what did he know about relationships before dating Kurt?

"I'm not stealing her from you," Sebastian adds.

Blaine chuckles, something real breaking through to the surface. "I'd like to see you try."

#

It's curious how it pulls at him. How a single text from June (where are you? already waiting in line. you don't want the Courvoisier to get cold) makes him smile and there's this strange tug in his chest where he supposes his heart is.

He's been in love before, but it's been so long since he's had the privilege of having those feelings returned. He'd dealt with unreciprocated feelings up to the point where the hassle of them became too much and he dispensed with them altogether. Instead he settled for—and started preferring—meaningless flings with faceless guys in any club he could find. And who could blame him? He's a healthy guy, good-looking and has his urges. Why wouldn't he be allowed to act out on them when straight guys did the same all the time?

There were rare moments where he wanted more, when the look in someone's eyes woke something deep and sentimental inside him, almost like his heart was making sure he knew he was still capable of it. He was grateful for those moments. But every time he'd opened himself up to that he'd gotten hurt. It's ironic it should be that fear of doing the same to June that's feeding his greatest doubts.

Sebastian stalks up behind her. "This'll never work, you know," he says, voice low in her ear.

June reels around and looks up at him. She contemplates his words for a few moments, a smile slowly sliding to the corner of her mouth. "Probably not," she says.

"Then again," –he shrugs– "I've never dated a girl."

June arches an eyebrow. "Have you ever dated, period?"

His eyes narrow on her face. "Is this how you want to start off our relationship, Wilder?" he asks. "Because two can play that game."

For a split second he's convinced he's ruined it, that a deeper relationship no longer warrants joking or teasing, but can only have room for serious conversation. Only he doesn't know what ever gave him that idea.

June smiles. "If you can't take the heat, Smythe—"

"What? Don't stand too close to the fire?" he interrupts, taking a step closer, mentally kicking himself for already letting his insecurities get to him. He decides there and then it won't happen again. He's going to see where this goes, where it takes him and June. If it doesn't work out, that's okay, because at least they'll have tried. But for the time being he loves how he feels around her. "Screw that," he adds, leans in, and presses a kiss to her lips.

June startles for a moment, but raises her arms to wrap around his neck, pulling him in closer. It still scares him how much he wants this, how badly he wants to surrender to this, be the person he wants to be, for himself and for June. But he can. He knows he can.

He's very much aware that a lot of people in the coffee shop are staring at them. Considering both him and June are regulars here they must have their questions.

June pulls back first, trying to catch her breath. She giggles and shakes her head. "This'll never work."

He smiles down at her, arms around her waist. "I know," he says.

It's doomed to fail, really, what do either of them know about dating the opposite sex?

But he thinks they'll just go ahead and try anyway.

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