Yeah I know I'm being horrible with the updates lately. SO sorry. But I think that it will get better once classes start tomorrow (as much as that doesn't really make sense) because I'll be a lot less busy. Well anyway, enjoy!
Katniss's POV
As my lips meet his in this kiss that I think I actually might have needed more than him, I immediately feel it go right through me. My veins which were boiling with anger and confusion not minutes ago are now buzzing with heat and passion, my heart racing at the hope that this could work. That I can get my Gale back just with this.
It takes him a second, but once he realizes what I'm trying to do, trigger any memory of me with this kiss, he goes with it. My hands have a mind of their own coming around his neck and pulling at the soft tendrils of hair at the nape of his neck as his own explore me, caressing my back and stomach. When the kiss ends we both have to catch our breath but stay close. I open my eyes with hope that it actually worked but I find in the dim light of this hidden hallway that his are still closed, his eyebrows creased in deep concentration. I watch him for a moment before he sighs and slowly opens, staring at me in an expression that for once I don't really understand.
"Well?" I question, attempting to keep my voice steady. But I can tell that he can sense the hope lingering just behind the surface, my breath still not as even as it should be.
He sighs and gives me a look of sadness as he slowly shakes his head. "No. I wish it was, but no."
I must look like I'm about to burst into tears or something because despite still not remembering me, he quickly pulls me to him in an embrace as I try desperately not to feel so disappointed.
"I'm sorry." He whispers. "So sorry. I don't…I don't want to hurt you anymore." And he has hurt me, so much that he doesn't even understand. Because he can't understand; the Capitol took that away from him too. And I know it's not entirely his fault but I can't help but blame him even though it's somewhat irrational. Why can't I just get him better myself? I've read the fairy tales, the spell is supposed to be broken with a kiss. Every time.
Maybe because fairy tales aren't real. Our lives have certainly not been a fairy tale and Gale nor I are royalty for sure. While she is treated like a celebrity and a kind of princess I guess you could say, Kennie isn't royal either; all we are is a family that has the weight of the Capitol and Snow bearing down on us, trying to control us with every move. And now that they have succeeded in half taking even our strength in each other away, I feel that somehow this spell won't be broken. Because it's not a spell; it's a cruel form of torture that experimented and worked in a way that seems irreversible. And I don't see any fairy godmothers coming to my rescue either. Which leaves us with this; Gale apologizing for the wrongs done to him because he has hurt me and Kennie, the ones he should love.
When I don't reply to his statement for a while, he decides to talk again. Really, I don't know how he can; I certainly can't find it in me. If the comfort of his arms is the only thing I can have because I still remember than I'll take it for as long as I can.
"I can feel something you know." He half whispers in a low, steady voice. Curiosity at the statement gets the best of me and I tentatively raise my head to look into his pained eyes. He looks like he has a headache or something again. Oh right, he said that he got them when he tried thinking of our lives together; maybe he really is trying. He just gazes at me for a moment before continuing. "I can't remember still but I can feel something. I don't know what it is but…"
"But what?" I ask quietly. While this doesn't make a ton of sense to me, I'll take anything I can get. I guess I'd rather have him not remember me but still love me than remember me and not. I can't believe it's come to me thinking that but in this sort of situation I guess I have to.
"I want…" he mutters but lets it drift off as something catches his attention and he lets his hold on me go as he walks curiously over to a camera maybe six or seven feet away.
What? What does he want? Me? To feel something? To get out of here? Ugh this is all so frustrating.
"Gale." I state, trying to get his attention but he shushes me, gesturing with his hand without looking away from the camera to come over. Curiosity overtakes me because I know he wouldn't have shushed me if it wasn't something big, something important. I find him looking through a camera that isn't at the level all the other ones are, its maybe six inches higher. And strangely enough, I find that there are two of them. Without looking away Gale taps his finger for me to look into it nearby the other camera and I get on my tiptoes to look.
I find myself looking at an office, as neat and clean and dull as all the rest of District 13. But inside of it I find Coin and a Capitol teenager with pink hair on the other side of the desk and for some reason she seems to be squirming. I can't really see her hands but by the way she's tensed up and seems to be trying to move her arms that lay on the armrests I'd assume that she's bound there in some way.
"Let me go! Why are you doing this?" she cries, and I recognize the voice. It's that girl that I met, the same one as Gale met. Leta.
"It's for your own good." Coin insists as she stands from her seat, some kind of syringe in her hand.
"How is this for my own good? You're forcing me to be someone I'm not." The girl insists, clearly angry and still struggling to get out of the chair as Coin slowly walks around the desk. She slightly quirks an eyebrow before answering.
"Dear, you are vital to our plan or don't you know that?" Coin questions her. "Your identity is being concealed for your own good."
"I'd rather be myself if you're using me to spy." The girl replies, no longer struggling but almost bars her teeth.
"Do you really expect anyone to talk to you if they knew who you were?" Coin questions, coming right next to the girl, blocking her from my view.
"I'm a rebel. You know that." The girl insists. Coin leans down without answering and I sense the girl's head lull back in her seat, eyes closed and relaxed. I half irrationally think that Coin killed her but that wouldn't make much sense with what they were talking about. Still, I feel slightly better once Coin walks back to her desk and I can sense her soft breathing from the tiny rise and fall of her chest.
"In more ways than one dear." Coin mutters and goes back to working on something. I'm still looking through the camera, striving for answers when I feel a hand on my back and I turn to find Gale looking at me.
"She is Leta then." He mutters and I nod in response. No matter what Coin insists everywhere else, she just admitted that this Vibia girl is not Vibia. The girl's voice was the same but even she didn't sound like Leta. Leta was a bubbly spirited girl and from what Rory mentioned Vibia is a more serious person trying to help with the plans. But this girl…she was angry and frustrated. Clearly being used.
"But why?" I whisper out loud. Why doesn't Coin want anyone to know that this girl they think is from the Capitol is actually a girl from District 5? Why are Gale and I the only ones that know the truth.
"Maybe we weren't meant to know her real identity but we do. Maybe that's why Coin wanted her to spy on us." Gale guesses and I shrug. Nothing really makes sense. Well…nothing except that this poor girl has to be someone else against her will clearly. I wonder if that syringe was filled with something to make her act differently.
"Still doesn't make much sense." I mutter and Gale shrugs.
"What does?" he asks rhetorically and when I don't respond he changes the topic. "Come on, we still need to find a way out of here."
I nod because we do; if we're in here much longer someone's going to get suspicious of our absence. But I know if we can find a way out than we can always find a way back in. I'm not entirely all for spying but clearly Coin has something up her sleeves that no one else knows about and if I have a way to monitor that than I'll take it.
If only I had a way to spy on Snow all these years.
Johanna's POV
I pace back and forth in the bunkers, clearly the only person here. I'm not even supposed to be here but it's alright. I don't know of any place here in District 13 that doesn't probably have cameras or bugs so this is probably the best place to meet. After all, what use is there to look at the cameras very often down here right now? Not much I could think of.
Where the hell is he? He should have been here by now. Did the meeting go bad? Did she not go with the blackmail? Is he being tortured or even killed right now for the things he knows? No, don't be stupid Johanna; that would only cause her more problems. Because then people would get suspicious. And lucky me, I have all the information they could want to punish her for that little move. Not that she knows that but even Coin isn't stupid enough to punish Finnick without a good reason because she will feel the backlash. Rebels are different than the Capitol. We want something different, not the same. And she has to at least appear to believe the same if she really doesn't.
I keep pacing for at least another ten agonizing minutes more before the door creaks open and I hear my name whispered. I softly bang on the wall of the compartment I'm in and a few seconds later he's quietly opening and closing the door, facing me. He looks weary and drained, and for once I can't tell how it went.
"Well?" I question him, desperate to know what's going on.
"No trial." He confirms and I breathe a sigh of relief. But…he doesn't look relieved at all. Why doesn't he look relieved?
"What is it?" I ask the burning question. Because if it was a successful blackmail he shouldn't look so…well white. He's paler than he should be and for some reason that scares me. Very few things frighten Finnick, and I would have to say that the only one I could think of would be if something happened to Annie. But if that was the case then he would probably be on the floor. No he looks more scared than agonized.
He shakes his head, eyes closed and I know something is wrong. "You still have that book?"
"Finnick, what is it?" I demand to know, ignoring his question. He averts my steady demanding gaze and repeats his question.
I sigh in frustration but nod. "Yeah I have it." He nods but doesn't answer me again. Why is it so important that I have that book? Why is he not telling me what's wrong?
What the fuck is going on here?
"Finn…" I start to question again but he surprises me by covering my mouth with his hand and shaking his head with a drained expression. It's enough to make me shut up as I wait for him to say something.
"Get out of here. Go back to seven." He insists in a low voice whispered in my ear. I pull away and give him my best what? face. He sighs deeply and comes closer again, pulling me into an embrace as he whispers again.
"Things are dangerous, Jo. Much more than I expected. Get that book and leave. We can't trust everyone we thought we could."
"What do you want me to do?" I ask him in his ear as he rubs my back and I pretend to be upset for the cameras. Because really, what other reason would we be like this?
"Keep it safe and yourself. I'll send someone once I know exactly who we can trust." He whispers back.
"Why?" I ask again, the question that keeps burning through me. None of this makes any sense. Why would a successful blackmail make him insist that I leave with his book of secrets?
With a sigh he whispers it to me in a low voice and my eyes go wide, not so much in fright as his are but more in anger. Why that…
He pulls away and wipes my eyes as if I was in tears. "Go. I'm sorry but you know why I can't." he insists in a normal voice and I pretend to the best I can through my anger to be sad and walk away. But really I'm boiling with anger inside and I wish I could kill plenty more people than I thought I wanted to.
Because he's right? Who can we really trust if the people we thought we could we can't?
All that's left to do is keep that vital information out of their hands at any cost. Besides, I hate this fucking place anyway.
Effie's POV
As I strut down the colorful streets of the place that has been my home my whole life in a brightly colored poufy sleeved fashionable outfit with sparkly orange heels, I somehow don't feel at home anymore. The fashionable outfits don't bring me the joy that they used to like when all that mattered to me was being successful and having the envy that came with my job of the District 12 escort for the Hunger Games. Walking down these streets that are filled with people dressing and acting like me, because we are privileged and entitled to the best of everything somehow doesn't make me feel like I'm entitled any more. Maybe this just comes with the territory of knowing too much. Or maybe it's just me seeing the light.
As I listen into the conversations on my way to tea with friends at a posh penthouse near the heart of the city, most of what I hear is complaining. Some about the lack of food from bad weather though luckily the grain is finally easily coming through again from District 9, some complaining about the lack of new designs for clothes and music chips that they can't get easily. Why don't they realize that they aren't getting things because the districts controlled by the rebels aren't sending them? Are they that naive or stupid or do I just know too much. But strangely enough, I do not feel pity for them nor can I be sympathetic any longer. Maybe being a rebel is better for the country but I don't feel as if I'm quite me anymore. But I have to at least appear to be.
Once I arrive for tea I'm among friends that aren't as naïve as some of the Capitol. They are higher up in their status, some because of their husbands and some because of their money. But either way, they all are aware of the rebellion and the districts being taken. There is some complaining and some mutterings of not understanding which I only join in on for my cover, but my heart is not in it. And I'm still thoroughly frightened that I will be caught as the one who planned that little scene in the street to distract people from Gale and Finnick's rescue though not one peacekeeper has come knocking on my door as of yet. But I can't act like I have something to hide. It just wouldn't do.
"Have you heard about what's going on in District 13?" one of the ladies here questions the group and some shake their heads, but one nods.
"Oh yes. Tragic, isn't it?" she sighs.
"What?" I ask. Do they know of the torture that poor doctor told me about that worked on Gale?
"It appears our lovely couple Katniss and Gale are no longer together!" she reveals and I gasp in real shock. No question I need to act on this one. This is news to me for certain. I thought that through everything that they would be unbreakable. They always have been it seems.
"No!" another lady gasps and the same woman, Barvial nods with a sigh, a tragic frown thought I doubt she sees how horrible her words truly are.
"Yes. Apparently Gale no longer wants Katniss or poor Makenna. He found some new girl named Leta or something that he keeps talking about here in the Capitol and brought her with them to District 13."
"That's horrible!" someone gasps and I have to agree. Is this just a rumor or is it true? I feel like I need to find out because if it is true then this is very bad. Meaning if it is, I suppose whatever torture that worked on him probably had something to do with it. But I can't simply take these words to heart from these ladies. They may be more aware than most of the Capitol but they are still gossipers like most Capitol women. I need to know from someone who would have a better idea.
Or maybe I simply don't want it to be true.