Chapter Forty-Two: The End of the Beginning
"And so, young men and young ladies, it is with a light heart and a fatherly pride that I send you into the world---fully learned wizards." Albus Dumbledore, headmaster of Hogwarts, surveyed the sea of faces before him, his bright smile contradicting the sorrow and pain he was feeling inside. Every year it became harder and harder to watch his students leave. Especially this year's class, so marked by the extraordinary circumstances it had brought with it; Harry Potter, the innocence of Sirius Black, the re-hiring of Professor Lupin., the beginning of a new force against Voldemort….and the death that had befallen them all in early April. He cleared his throat, formulating a way to speak of the occasion without bringing back too many of it's painful memories.
"And I also wish, for all of you brilliant young people, to remember the loss we suffered, and to allow it to strengthen us, not hinder us."
Four rows back, seated in silence, Harry Potter felt himself tense. Death, no matter whom it afflicted, had a way of making one reflect on life. When he had first heard the news, his reaction had been one of overwhelming grief. Regrets, so numerous, guilt that abounded with his careless remarks and shoddy treatment of the deceased…. Everything hit him hard, giving him more than one reason to be ashamed of himself. He vowed, that very day, to live his life as if he were living for someone else. To give them the life they had been denied by the evil cruelty of Lord Voldemort. His plans, beginning that very day, included joining the rising forces to fight Voldemort---to give his best to see his defeat.
But for some, it was too late.
Ron Weasley was having trouble sitting still. Dumbledore's words washed over him, and he couldn't help but feel a pang of sorrow for the entire school's loss. He remembered how he had found out--- sitting in the Common Room, defeated at Wizard Chess by Hermione, Harry had come bursting through the portrait, eyes wild. And as he had poured out the horrid details, the story surrounding the horrendous death, his own eyes had enlarged to saucers. Unbeleiving, he had climbed to his room, spending the entire day in his bed, refusing to speak to anyone. Death happened to other people—disconnected from his life. Nothing like this ever happened to Ron. Nothing like this was supposed to happen. Life was great. Happy. Not brutal and bloody.
Ron lowered his head and prayed for Dumbledore to finish speaking soon.
Hermione Granger was crying. Tears coursing down her cheeks, she felt her fellow students giving her questioning and sympathetic looks. None of them expected this kind of a reaction from her. Not from Hermione, who had professed hatred so many times, jealous contempt over a brighter, more intelligent person. But death changes all that. Death makes one realize just how needed a person was---something she would never be able to learn from a book.
First hand experiences were far more effectual.
Seated behind Dumbledore, Remus Lupin found it hard to focus his eyes. Grief, overwhelming him with it's power, made it hard to keep Dumbledore's back from blurring and wavering. He found no comfort in the surrounding eyes of his fellow faculty members. No student could catch his eye and give him a reassuring nod. His only thoughts were centered around how much he wanted to change the past, to find a way to alter that night's events, give back the life that had been so brutally taken. His fault, all of it. His choices had led him to the path he was on---his decisions, stubborn refusal to see what was happening right before his eyes… all of it boiled down to one explanation: it was all because of Remus. It was because of him that the entire school was silent. Because of him, one of their ranks was missing forever. Because of him, Voldemort's powers remained unquestionable. The only ray of hope, the only solace in those thoughts, was what lay clutched in his fingers. Held so tightly, it's impression was embedded in his skin like a brand. But he refused to let go, to loosen his grip. Not until… not until they were together again.
He was in agony. Anyone could see it. They didn't have to be connected to him to see it. Eyes downcast, knuckles white with exertion as he held tightly to something in his palm. Tense, rigid, and trembling, he resembled a small, helpless child more than the 37 year old man he was. A pathetic sight for anyone to behold, but far more painful for those who knew him. And had no way of comforting him. It was painfully obvious to anyone who cared to notice:
The death of Severus Snape had affected him more than anyone else in the assembly.
Almost.
Casey sat perfectly still, eyes zeroed on Remus, willing him to look at her. She didn't need to hear him say the words she felt in her heart. She knew he believed himself to be at fault for Snape's suicide. Had he been more careful, not flown her to Bristol and give him the opportunity to find them… She heard his entire line of thinking, right down to the very last regret. She heard them from him because she had heard them from herself so many times before. That night hadn't let her rest for two months. Every night she relived the terror---the blackness that had followed Snape's reassurance of it being over quickly. And when she revived, seeing him on the floor, blood puddle around his lifeless body. The knife, brought for her, but used to silence the tumultuous feelings of wrong and consciousness on himself instead, was embedded in his chest, his eyes wide and unblinking at the ceiling. He had been so right---love was a weakness. The weakness which possessed him to spare his beloved Melody's daughter's life and take his own, ending the tormenting agony Voldemort insisted he dole out. Leaving her to live, to birth a daughter, and to carry on the legacy her mother had begun. To leave her to become a fighter against the Dark Lord, to end his reign of terror once and for all.
With her future husband at her side.
Speech ended, Dumbledore cleared his throat. There was one last thing to say. Something that had been waiting to be said for nearly six months.
"There is one last thing for you to hear from me today," he began, eyes scanning the crowds. "After mourning the loss of a most beloved teacher, it is with a much gladder heart that I change the subject to news of a lighter nature. As many have heard, our dearly loved Professor Lupin has formally withdrawn from his position at this school." There were several moans and boos, which Dumbledore waved away with his hand.
"However," he continued loudly, over the voices of the students, "he has secured a permanent role in the Ministry's newest Defense Fighters."
There was several catcalls and cheers---more for the hope that Lupin might finally overcome his grief than for the loss of everyone's favorite DADA teacher. Dumbledore went on.
"I would like to add, he will be joined by several of you, whom have already joined the ranks. And, following his wedding tomorrow night, he will be joined most happily by his wife."
Stunned silence fell over the assembly, soon followed by fevered whispering. Remus finally lifted his eyes, meeting with Casey's over the heads of the confused student body.
Till death do us part, Casey
Much longer than that.
She sat back in her chair, a peace breaking over her face, setting her fears and regrets to rest at last. Across the room, eyes winking with conspiratorial "I knew it!" smirks, Harry, Ron, and Hermione all crossed their arms over their chests and leaned back in their chairs, confident at last of the secrets both had kept so well guarded during the year.
On the platform, hair falling messily into his eyes, Remus Lupin could feel himself smiling.
Prologue
At the finish of Dumbledore's speech, the students scattered in all directions, making the most of their last day at Hogwart's before the summer holidays. For four, however, their steps were more sedate, more calm, and wiser.
"I'm sorry I ever caused you any grief between you and Lupin," Harry began.
"And we tried to expose the two of you." Added Hermione.
"And, erm… sorry I didn't pay enough attention to realize any of this was going on," Ron stammered, blushing madly.
"And I apologize for having to lie to you all," Casey said softly, eyes lowered.
"But not any more."
She looked up and met Harry's eyes with a smile.
"No, Harry. Not any more."
The following night was perfect. It was a new moon, but there were enough stars and dancing fairies to give the same brilliance of a full moon. The light danced on the petals of the scattered white lilies strewn about. Very few people stood in the garden—only seven, including Remus himself. But it was enough.
Soft music filtered through the starry air, and she appeared at the end of the path. Remus couldn't take his eyes off her, for fear she'd disappear and prove his happiness to be a dream. His hands were still tightly closed around his comforting talisman, steadying his shaking body. She neared, eyes locked on his as she came to a stop. Sensing his nervousness, she looped her arm through his and kept him steady throughout the ceremony. It wasn't until the end, after both swore their vows, that he dared to open his hand to reveal the only thing that had managed to keep him from being completely suffused in pain at Severus' death: a small silver wedding band.
Sliding it on her finger, he lifted his eyes to hers, hands gripping hers tightly. Without words, they spoke of the pains and hardships they had endured to arrive at that moment, and the promises both made to sustain the love they had found in each other.
Eyes shining, she brushed aside his brown hair from his eyes. With a soft smile, he leaned closer
"Je t'aime, ma chere," he whispered softly. "Pour tout l'heure."
"Much longer than that," Casey murmured back, their faces coming together in a kiss, sealing their union.
One month later, Casey was pregnant.
A/N: Ack, I put this one at the end this time so it didn't get in the way. I wanted to reiterate my thanks to everyone and anyone who's taken the time to even read this story, and even more thanks to those who review it. (hint hint) I wanna dedicate this chapter to Gaea (HA! HE spoke French!) and I have to admit, Lilith True and her "leaving for a month" is the only reason why this was posted now instead of Friday night. Hopefully, Gaea will take this whole 42 chapter story and post it on her site, so merci beaucoup pour ca…. MUWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHA I have to go to take a math exam now. So I'm gone. Outta here. Love all you guys, love Remus, love JKR for creating them (and copyrighting them, what-what!) Happy Holidays to all, and to all a good night.
Until next time, I remain:
Casey Franklin Lupin
Thank you.