A/N: So sorry to everyone that this update is a little late in coming, but I was out of town for a couple of days and unable to post anything. I have read and tried to respond to all the wonderful reviews. Thank you so very much! So here is the much anticipated continuation of Esme's saga.....
Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns all things twilight, I just own my copies of the books. No copyright infringement is intended anywhere.
Making Everything Ready
Carlisle's POV
I sat next to my wife gently stroking her hair. Even in sleep her features were crumpled in sadness. She was finally resting and I could let my vulnerability out, I could turn Dr. Cullen off and deal with my own sadness.
The bleeding had slowed to just a tiny bit of spotting. I had seen this many times before in my medical career, and it usually ended badly. Whether it was infection or too much blood loss, the mother often ended up dying.
I felt a strong hand on my shoulder and turned to see both Edward and Bella standing beside me. Edward held his hand out to me, pulled me up and led me out of the room. Bella took my seat next to Esme, I knew she would be alright for a little bit.
I walked outside and for the first time I was the weak one. I was the one who broke down. Silently Edward pulled me into a hug and let me fall apart. He had wisdom beyond his years to know I needed this release but couldn't do it in front of Esme.
After an eternity and all the tears I had were shed, he released me and stepped back.
"Is...is the baby...?" He couldn't even finish his sentence. He knew how much we had wanted a child of our own, as much as we loved him, it was different.
"The baby is still in her womb. I don't know if it will be still born, I don't know why she began to bleed. I don't know..."
"But that is good news, that all is not lost, isn't it?" He was so hopeful. I wasn't sure, after all the death and tragedy I had seen as a doctor, that I could be that optimistic.
"All we can do is pray. Esme will have to stay in bed for the rest of her term, I'm afraid if she exerts herself, she will not be able to keep the child inside long enough." My shoulders slumped forward as I rubbed my hands roughly over my face.
"Then we will do all that we can to lighten her load."
All I could do was nod and move back toward the cabin. I pushed open the door and headed straight into our bedroom. Esme was still asleep and for that I was grateful. The less she became agitated the better. Bella had taken the soiled linens and was washing them, I don't know what I would've done with out she and Edward. It would certainly be a long several months.
BPOV
Sept. 30, 1863
It has been a stressful couple of weeks. Esme's bleeding has completely stopped, but Carlisle insists she remain in bed, and I'm inclined to agree. She's a bit frustrated and sore from staying in the same spot for so long. Her belly is swelling with the growing child, which has been a huge relief to all.
Because of all the tumult, my birthday passed by with out much ado, which was fine with me. Edward was sweet as ever and presented me with a cake that he made himself (under Esme's direction I'm sure) and a beautiful mirror that will hang on the wall in the dressing area of our new house.
I have been doing as much as I can, but I'm slowing down too. I have a little more than a months time before the baby is expected. It's all I can do to waddle around the house doing basic chores. Bending over is impossible, and when I do have to pick anything up off of the floor, it's quite the production.
Edward walked into the cabin one day when I was trying to pick up a spoon I had dropped. I was squatted down with one hand on the floor for balance and the other hand was picking up the dropped object. Once I had retrieved the spoon I braced myself and slowly walked my hands back up my legs until I could straighten out. He looked nearly giddy watching my efforts until he caught my death stare. "NOT A SINGLE WORD MISTER!" I shouted. I think he learned his lesson after that.
Esme and I had been working on baby clothes and we had amassed a pretty good stack of gowns, blankets and diapers. Edward was able to get several sets of sterling silver diaper pins for both babies, that was a big relief, we weren't sure how long it would take Tyler to order them into the general store.
Now we were working on curtains for the new house. The men had backed off the construction a little bit right after Esme's crisis, but have since returned to the building with renewed zeal. Edward tells me it's almost finished; the rooms look like rooms with walls and everything. The windows are in and the doors are hung. They are working on finishing touches in the kitchen and in a week or two Edward and Carlisle will make one final trip into town to pick up all the cooking utensils, plates, and other sundry items to outfit the house.
They will also bring Angela back with them. She has agreed to stay with us to help with the birth of the baby and all the household chores for a little while. I can't begin to say how grateful I am for her willingness to help.
I can't believe time has flown by so quickly. Edward and I have come so very far in such a short time. We have a new home, a baby coming, and a love deeper than I ever thought possible. I truly do feel so blessed.
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
Oct. 16 1863
The stew and biscuits were almost finished, it was Edwards favorite meal. Esme was sitting at the table setting out the plates and utensils I had given her. She was still taking things slowly, but I could tell she was feeling much better. She seemed to have more hope than a few weeks ago. I was so happy that they hadn't lost the baby. I don't think I could've handled the guilt of my continuing healthy pregnancy, with her failed one, living in the same house.
The men came in unusually jovial this night. I looked up from the hearth to see them shaking hands and pounding each other on the back.
"What's the good news?" I inquired as I walked over to my husband. He leaned over and wrapped me in a big hug.
"It's ready," he whispered softly into my ear.
"Really? We can move in?" I was so hopeful for this day. I knew the baby would be coming soon and I so wanted to be in our new house by then.
I had been having pains but they were never regular and wouldn't last very long. Carlisle told me the pains had to be a few minutes apart and coming regularly, so I never worried about them. They were just bothersome. I was diligently reading the midwifery book we had acquired from the general store a while back, it was very informative. I felt fairly confident in my ability to bring forth this child. I even made Edward read the book with me. It was quite amusing to see his face contort at some of the descriptions. I laughed myself silly when he nearly passed out from looking at one of the drawing of the birth process.
Edward and Carlisle made plans to go into town the next day for all the supplies we would need. They were going to be taking both wagons into town because not only would we need the hard goods, we'd also have to outfit nearly the entire pantry with at least the basic staples.
"So is the furniture in place then?" I was curious as to exactly what Edward meant when he said it was finished.
"Yes Bella, the bed is set up with the cradle right beside, the dining table and chairs are all in place, we have the settee in the parlor with the two big chairs on either side, the work table in the kitchen is in place and the pump is tested and working. Everything is perfect. Carlisle even said we could use the bed in the loft for the second bedroom when Angela is with us so she'll be comfortable."
I threw my arms around him and planted a big kiss on his lips. He eagerly wrapped his arms around me and drew me in close to his side. We didn't linger too long since Carlisle and Esme were right there, but it was still a kiss that made me swoon.
"It sounds absolutely wonderful. I can't wait for moving day!"
With this milestone almost finished, there was one more thing I wanted to accomplish. I needed to get my manuscript to a publisher in New York. I had painstakingly duplicated three more copies of my memoire and had inquired about publishers the last time I was in town. I knew where they needed to go, I was just nervous to send them.
I was trying to work up the nerve to ask Edward to take them to the post when they went to town tomorrow and I guess I was distracted enough that he noticed.
"Bella," he touched my cheek and brought my eyes to his, "where are your thoughts? You seem so far away."
Here it was, my opportunity to tell him all that I've been working on. I don't know why I felt so nervous, probably because that memoire bared my entire existence for anyone to see.
"Edward, you know I've been writing a lot lately right?"
"Of course Love, you spend most of your free time scratching away in your journal." He smiled reassuringly so I pressed on.
"Well, it's not just a journal, I've been compiling a memoire that I want to try to have published."
"Really? I had no idea it was that involved. Bella, I think that's wonderful. I always knew, even before I met you that your true dream was to become an authoress. All that business about a home of your own being your only dream was just the longing of a scared young woman who was desperate for safety."
"Oh, a home of my own is most definitely a dream of mine, one that is about to come true, thanks to all your hard work," I kissed him soundly on the lips. "But you're right about my writing, that has always been my dream."
"I know it has my love, what can I do to help you?"
"I have three copies of the manuscript prepared, I was wondering if you could post them tomorrow when you're in town. The addresses are already on each package, they just need to be sent off." I looked up hopefully, seeing only love and pride and adoration radiating from his face.
"I will make certain of it Bella. I'm so proud that you've accomplished this," he looked down and picked up my hands with so much tenderness. "Do you think you'd let me read it?"
I knew he was going to ask this question. I don't know why it was hard for me to let him read my story, I guess because he played such a large part in it, but it still felt strange to have him read it. I was really going to have to get over my fear of people reading what I wrote if I wanted to be successful.
"It's alright if you don't want me to read it, that's fi..," I cut him off with a kiss and a smile. He was so thoughtful of my feelings I couldn't help but feel like he deserved to read the manuscript.
"No, Edward, I want you to read it. I just....it's silly really,"
"Nothing about this is silly Bella," he chided.
"I just feel a little bit shy having you read the story, because it's not just about me, it's about you too."
"So I'm in there too huh?" He was chuckling now.
"Well, of course silly! It is a memoire of a frontier mail order bride, naturally her husband is going to play a significant role in the story." I shook my head like he should've already known.
"Ahh, I see. Well, from what I've heard, the folks on the east coast love to read those kinds of stories. I'm sure it will do very well my love. So...can I read it?"
"Yes, I'll give you the master copy when we're done with the chores if you want."
"I want very much. I'm sure it will be captivating and wonderful."
I rolled my eyes and continued cleaning up the dishes. I had another contraction pain that was stronger and it made me stop what I was doing. I inhaled sharply and rested my hand on the top my belly. Some part of the baby was poking up into my ribs and causing me a great deal of discomfort. Not to mention my belly was hard all over with the tightening of the muscles.
Edward eyed me suspiciously and asked, "what's wrong love?"
My eyes were pinched shut and I was trying to push the baby down out of my ribs. I took a few steadying breaths and my lack of verbal response increased Edwards concern. "Bella! What is wrong? What's going on?" He placed his hands on my stomach and his eyes grew wide in fear when he felt the hardness of my stomach. "Oh my...what's going on Bella? Is it time? Is this...?"
I shook my head and put my finger up asking for a minute's reprieve. He took a deep breath and ran his fingers through his messy hair. This was precisely why I hadn't mentioned anything about these pains before. I knew he would completely overreact and of course I was right. Once the pain had passed and my muscles began to relax a bit I was able to speak again.
"Edward, calm down. It's just my body getting ready to have the baby. It's not time yet and I don't think it will be for another couple of weeks. I'm not having any of the other signs of readiness that Carlisle or the book talked about. Please stop worrying."
"I just don't want to miss anything. Though I don't know how I'm going to stand seeing you in pain. I think that will be the worst part of the whole thing."
"I know, I'm a little bit scared about that too. But there's no changing our minds now huh?"
We both chuckled and finished our tasks. I fetched the memoire for Edward and as he settled down to read, I checked in on Esme.
"Is there anything you need Esme? I'm closing up the kitchen and just wondered if you wanted a snack for later?"
"No Bella, I'm fine. Thank you dear."
I made my way up to the loft and readied myself for bed. Edward was still downstairs reading. I called down and let him know I was going to sleep. The only response I got was a 'Umhmm'. I smiled, I guess he was enjoying the book. I could only hope the publishers did too.
A/N: So has everyone calmed down? I didn't make Esme have a miscarriage, but for a woman her age with no previous births, she wasn't going to escape scott free. Last chapter got 54 reviews! Can we beat that? I think we can. I'm looking forward to reading your thoughts!