Hey, don't forget to check out my semi-serious story, "Jungle Escape." Wanna know my version of what happens after Breaking Dawn? Find out...FYI: I don't own Twilight (But I'd love to have Edward listen to my heart...)

Random Questions I'd like to ask the Twilight Characters (Part 21)

101. Do vampires have staring contests?

Logical Conclusion: Since vampire eyes don't have tears the way ours do (they're unable to cry) it seems that staring would just be stupid. There's nothing to keep them from looking at each other forever. Well, starvation/thirst and boredom.

Sarah's Story: Not with humans, because that would just be stupid. With each other, well, it's a way to pass the time when you're not out deer hunting or working on yet another school term paper. About the Civil War. Which Jasper fought in. Since you've read his thoughts a million times and already know everything there is to know about it (you also remember everything you read. Super-vampire brain cells, ya know...) it's kind of redundant. Staring is way down on a vampire's to-do list, but hey, since neither of your eyes can dry out when you stare, more power to ya.

102. When Edward climbs stairs with Bella in the movie, he climbs the stairs one at a time. Do vampires bother with climbing stairs one at a time with noone around, or do they just jump from the bottom to the next floor up?

Logical Conclusion: Edward and his family want to appear as normal as possible. If they started to jump up flights of stairs with nobody around, they might accidentally slip in front of the humans, and ooops, that's the end of living a double life.

Sarah's Story: If I could jump the stairs, there would be nothing and nobody to prevent me from doing it all the time. Stairs are so unimportant. No reason to waste part of the eternity which is vampire life on a trivial thing like climing stairs.

103. Did Rosalie return the wedding dress she'd stolen after she used it to kill her rapists?

Logical Conclusion: She never mentioned it, so I doubt she returned it. She said she stole it. If she would have returned it, she'd have said "borrowed" instead of stole. I imagine that dress went in the casket with Royce when he was buried. Just for fun. Rosalie's final word on the subject. She'd have slipped it in as an eternal reminder of what she'd gone through.

Sarah's Story: Rosalie is very conscious of obeying laws. She'd return the dress. (This is a complete lie. I just think it's better to answer this way because of question 103 ½.

103 ½. Did someone ever wear that wedding dress for a wedding ceremony?

Logical Conclusion: No way. Rosalie wouldn't want someone's wedding tainted by the dress being used. Who cares if they didn't know what happened while Rosalie wore the dress? She wouldn't want some happy bride's life tainted with Royce's sleeze.

Sarah's Story: Yup. Someone wore it. Passed from mother to daughter, it's the one Lorena Bobbitt wore. She was sure it would bring her luck. Rosalie's influence stuck to the dress, though. Too bad when she found her cheatin' husband. She had to dispose of his manly parts out her car window after she hacked 'em off... But she was SO beautiful in that wedding dress, right?

104. When Edward saves Bella in Port Angeles, why didn't he have Bella report the men to the authorities, or at least tell Charlie about the incident?

Logical Conclusion: Any type of police involvement brings questions. The Cullens don't like questions. Questions lead to running from the law. It doesn't look good when the Chief's daughter almost gets abducted or attacked in another small nearby town. Edward had to hope she'd ignore the attack and let him handle it. By that time, she already guessed he was a vampire. She says so in the car on the drive home, and says it didn't matter to her. In any case. she didn't ask for that, he didn't offer it. She probably worried Charlie would wrap her in bubble wrap and never let her out of his sight again. To a teenager, that's a fate worse than death. So the attack goes unreported. Naughty, naughty Bella.

Sarah's Story: Have you read the "Midnight Sun" excerpt? It explains fully why Edward didn't tell Charlie. He and Carlisle took care of the bad guy. Edward rocks.

105. How does Charlie get Billy Black up the stairs when he's in a wheelchair in the Twilight movie? Do they carry him and the chair separately, or is Charlie just super strong?

Logical Conclusion: Charlie's strong. Either that or they have a wheelchair ramp going up the back of the house.

Sarah's Story: Charlie lifts Billy. They're good friends. Billy doesn't mind. They gut fish together, catch fish together, and generally have a good time. Billy's not worried that Charlie will find it weird. The wheelchair does that for him. It has an amazing ability to make eyes slide right over you whenever you go someplace. (I know all about this – the husband's blind. Eyes spot his cane, and suddenly it's like he's not there. Amazing. We whip out that cane when we go through the airport, though, and it's like we're royalty. Love that part. We get through security like nobody's business. He doesn't like to use it because of the natural people-repellant it seems to have, but in certain places, it's useful.) Billy probably gets that all the time. Charlie knows how to alleviate the awkwardness between them – offer to fight. Dance away and pretend to punch him. Let that part of the scene be more interesting than Jake and Bella talking. Oh well. Billy Burke who plays Charlie, I'm afraid to say, is slightly hot. Does this make me old? How is it that the dad, wolfpack. and the vampire males, who are all varying ages, are all hot? I'm SO old.