Note: On the last chapter, their final saying was supposed to be, "Can Hikaru deal with how Kaoru actually feels?"
The Seventeenth Day Fujioka Household
Kaoru sat, laughing with Haruhi as he helped her prepare supper.
"You're not that bad, Haruhi," Kaoru admitted as he pulled his stuff out of the oven.
Haruhi raised an eyebrow as she put her food on the table and sat down across from him.
"You too."
Kaoru shook his head.
"What?" Haruhi worried. "Did I say something wrong?"
"You lied right there."
"I did? About what? I really do think you're not that bad," Haruhi continued.
Kaoru shook his head. "I am that bad though. I'm a horrible person and I know it."
Haruhi frowned, "You never talk good about yourself, why?"
"There's nothing good to say."
So they started to eat. Ranka came home and joined the two at the table. Afterwards, Ranka was obsessing over Kaoru.
"You're skin's so smooth!" He exclaimed.
"Dad, don't scare Kaoru," Haruhi nagged.
Kaoru smiled.
"Only as smooth as Hikaru's," Kaoru sighed.
The Fujioka's looked at Kaoru worridly.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Haruhi asked.
"We're the same," Kaoru sighed. "There's no difference."
"Don't tell yourself that!" Ranka replied. "You two are very different."
Kaoru began tearing up. He whimpered, "That doesn't help."
Kaoru sat down at the table again and the two began bombing him with questions.
"Why are you so sad when you two are told you're different?"
"Because we're twins, you're not supposed to know that."
"Why are you sad when you're told you're the same?"
"Because..."
Kaoru held his breath. He thought back to health class and how they never did finish their class session. "Because it's like loving yourself. It's narcissistic. I don't want to be a narcissist, it's not good, it's a terribly unforgivable sin."
The two sighed and stared at Kaoru.
"Tell us something good about yourself," They both replied at the same time.
Kaoru sat thinking. "There's nothing."
"What?"
"There's nothing good about me."
They both shook their heads.
"There must be something good about you," Ranka insisted.
"Nope, not really," Kaoru replied. "I'm just a horrible person. There's nothing to be grateful about."
"Do you hate yourself?" They both questioned.
Kaoru thought and opened his mouth, but didn't say anything.
Yes. I do.
Kaoru stood up.
"I feel sick, I'm going home," Kaoru responded.
"I thought your parents were out of town?" Haruhi asked.
Kaoru felt sick for real now. "They are."
Ranka stood up and gripped Kaoru's arm, "Then you can stay here with us! We'll take good care of you!"
"I... Hikaru..." Kaoru began to say.
"What about Hikaru?" Haruhi wondered.
Kaoru shook his head.
"I guess I'll stay."
Ranka made up a bed for Kaoru and Haruhi made Kaoru some soup to nestle his stomach.
Kaoru sat on the made bed sipping some of the soup.
He closed his eyes and sighed.
Kaoru put the soup next to him on the table and hugged himself and began crying.
"What's wrong?" Ranka wondered as he walked in. "Haruhi's out shopping."
"I... I want..." Kaoru sobbed.
"What do you want?"
"I want my Hikaru!" Kaoru bawled. "I want him back! I don't want them to take him away!"
Ranka frowned and stood there and stared at Kaoru, not knowing how to deal with this.
"I want him..." Kaoru cried deeply and he began whining. "I want him..."
"Lex-chan is coming back soon, you should at least regain your composure," Ranka explained, trying not to sound mean.
"I don't want to see her..." Kaoru snarled between his clenched teeth. "It's all her fault. It's her fault I'm going to hell."
Ranka sat next to Kaoru. "Do you hate her?"
Kaoru laughed, "No, I don't hate her. Because it's all my fault. It's my fault this happened in the first place. It's all my fault."
"Do you hate yourself?"
"Yes... yes I do..." Kaoru whispered. "It's my fault God hates me."
Haruhi's Dad's POV
Well, what am I to do? Haruhi brings a friend home and he starts breaking down, and his parents aren't home! I don't know, it's probably one of those rich people's things. I don't know when his parents are gonna come back. How long am I gonna have to look after this one? I already have to look after that little girl until her mother gets better.
This child though... something's wrong with him. I can already see that. He's a bit psychotic I think. I don't really know how to explain it. He's really mad and angry. How does he take that out?
On himself.
Whenever anything ever goes on, he hates himself for it. I guess that's a way to live your life. I'd never live mine like that, but hey, this kid isn't me. It hurts to see him like this though. It hurts to see a child who despises everything. He must've been neglected. He's the opposite of most rich children. He doesn't act spoiled. He doesn't do anything like that. There's one thing that I can already see happens. When something goes wrong, when he feels spoiled, there's only one thought going through his head.
"I hate myself so much for that. How much stupider can I get?"