Hey again my loves! There isn't a tremendous amount of action in this chapter, but that's ok, because there will be plenty coming up soon! I am so glad that you are all liking this story! I took into account all of the feedback that you all gave me and I decided to just keep this story going as it is, rather than breaking it up. As always, please let me know what you think!
Darcy was still tired from her 'interdimensional jet-lag' and the residual scattered strangeness from her dream, but she decided that lying in Loki's bed all day, as tempting a thought as that was, was impractical. She had way too much to do. First, she had her appointment with Eir, which was nerve-wracking enough to contemplate, but then she was also going to have to speak to Jane at some point. Also, she wanted to see if maybe she could find a library of some sort where she could do research. Possibly, tucked away in some old dusty tome was a clue or insight as to how to stop the menace spreading on Earth. It was a long shot, Darcy knew, but she had to try all the same.
Loki was already out of bed, he had been for some time. Darcy noticed that he didn't look happy, he was beginning to seem quite tense, she could see it in his face, in his movements—everything was sharper and colder.
''What are you going to do today?'' Darcy asked, propping her head up on her hand. His lips set in a thin line and his eyes darkened over. ''Unfortunately, my presence has been requested by the Allfather in several different meetings today,'' he answered. ''I suppose that he figures as long as I'm back he might as well take the opportunity to torture me with endless politics.''
Darcy looked up at him. ''Maybe he thinks that your opinions are valuable,'' she offered.
Loki let out a cough of unsettling laughter. ''He thinks no such thing. He's baiting me, he wants me to voice my opinion so that he can slam it down in front of everyone. It's just another one of his punishments, only more subtle.'' He sighed and looked back at her, calming a little as he stared into her blue eyes. ''I wanted to be with you today,'' he added softly, voice dusted with regret.
''Hey, don't worry, I'll be fine,'' Darcy reassured him. ''I'm going to go to the Healing Chambers and see Eir and make sure everything's kosher and then I'll just...explore, I guess.'' She pulled herself to a sitting position, stretched.
''Alright, just don't get lost,'' Loki told her, forcing a slight smile. ''I'll come and see you as soon as I have a minute.''
One of the things that Darcy distinctly noticed about Asgard was that everyone that she passed suddenly seemed to know her. Walking down the palace hallway, she moved by a young woman who was cleaning the windows. When she saw Darcy, the woman almost nervously straightened up and gave a weird sort of curtsy, then looked away. The Healing Chambers were in an entirely separate wing of the palace from where her room was, and it was a bit of a walk. She passed by two more people, an elegantly dressed, stiff-backed man and woman who looked like dignitaries of some sort. They took notice of her and inclined their heads in a swift bow, murmuring, ''My Lady,'' as she walked by. While it was nice to be bowed to for about five seconds, it was also vaguely creepy. Nobody on Asgard had ever exactly treated her normally, but Darcy supposed that to them, she was a bit unusual.
Darcy chewed her fingernails nervously at the thought of seeing Jane again as she sat and waited outside of the doors of the Healing Chambers, wishing like hell that there was a back issue of Cosmo to read. In a way, she was almost grateful to have their impending reunion to worry about, because it distracted her slightly from her anxiety about this appointment. Her heart fluttered nervously like a leaf caught in the air. What if something was wrong? There was a very distinct possibility creeping in her mind: it might not be a normal pregnancy. This baby had been conceived in a very strange quantum space, where the ordinary laws of physics failed to apply. And that thought and its ramifications haunted her mind.
Looking up as the door opened, Darcy saw the tall, blonde healer smile at her and motion her forward. She drew in a deep breath and then walked over and stepped inside the room. As before, she found that it had a very pleasant, soothing atmosphere, but that still wasn't helping to calm her nerves.
''It's good to see you again, my Lady,'' Eir said, seeming genuinely happy. ''I'd heard all kinds of strange tales regarding your whereabouts—I'm so glad that you both are back safe.''
Darcy nodded. ''Thanks. I'm ah, glad to be back too.'' Everything was silent for a moment. Then she began awkwardly, ''Loki said that he told you about-''
''Yes, he did,'' Eir finished. She gave Darcy a long, soft look, studying her. ''Well, lets just see what's happening, shall we?'' The healer motioned for her to lay down on the long examination table. Not knowing what to expect, Darcy just lay there and looked up at the intricate ceiling, trying to take deep breaths. ''No need to be nervous,'' said Eir in her calm voice as she moved around the room, looking for something. Then she found it and came back over. It was a long, rectangular device of some sort that she waved over Darcy's lower body. Trails of light followed her motions, making patterns in the air before dissipating. The healer took note of these patterns, and nodded. Her hands came down against Darcy's abdomen, feeling around gently. She nodded again. ''Alright, you can sit up now,'' she said brightly. Darcy, who had been forcing herself to zone out, blinked in surprise. She pulled herself to a sitting position on the table. ''That's it?'' she asked in disbelief.
''Yes,'' replied Eir. ''Why do you look so shocked?''
''Don't you have to like...'' She made motions to try to imply a gynecological exam and the healer simply looked at her strangely. ''Have to like...poke around inside...''
Now Eir looked halfway between amused and ill. ''I certainly don't,'' she answered evenly. ''The tools I use are more than adequate for seeing what's going on inside of you.''
''And?'' she asked, bracing herself.
''You needn't look so worried,'' the healer said. ''Everything is fine.''
''Really?'' cried Darcy. Dizzying relief washed over her.
''Really. You are approximately six weeks pregnant, and in quite good health.''
''That's so weird to me.'' Darcy now held up her hand and counted on her fingers.
''What are you trying to figure out?'' Eir asked, a curious smile on her face. ''I'm trying to figure out the last time I had my period, and it was most definitely less than six weeks ago,'' replied Darcy with a frown. ''It was like two weeks ago. I'm trying to wrap my mind around this. I get sucked into the Palace of Souls for three days, three freakin days, and then when I come out I'm six weeks pregnant.''
''I know that your pregnancy had a very unusual start, but please trust me, everything is going to be fine. It should progress at a normal rate,'' Eir told her firmly. ''Nothing bizarre or mysterious is going to happen. You'll probably be more tired than usual, and you may feel sick to your stomach. It will pass.'' She reached up to one of the shelves and pulled down a small blue glass bottle. ''Put two drops of this under your tongue and it should ease any discomfort. I want to see you again in a few weeks.''
As she gratefully accepted the bottle from her and got up to leave, Darcy hesitated for a moment.''Just one more thing.'' Eir waited with a raised eyebrow, motioning for her to continue. ''Why is everyone all like...weirdly respectful and calling me 'Lady' and stuff?'' she asked.
The healer looked amused by the question, but she gently answered, ''Well, as far as everyone here understands, you're Loki's wife, or at least some approximation of, and despite his previous antics he is still a prince, so...'' she shrugged.
''So they feel like they have to be all formal, I get it.'' Darcy shook her head. Strangely enough, the fact that her station had been automatically elevated by her association with Loki never occurred to her. She tended to forget that he was royal.
''Yes.'' Eir paused a moment, then added, ''I also think that many here are still a bit...wary and perhaps fearful towards him, and they don't want to give him any reason to be angry.'' That sounded somehow more accurate, in Darcy's opinion.
Darcy left the Chambers feeling as though a weight had been lifted. For a second, she was almost giddy, wanted to go skipping down the elegant marble hallway. And then, up ahead, she spotted a familiar figure sitting by one of the large windows. Darcy stopped and stood still as Jane Foster turned her head. A smile broke out on the scientist's face, a bright, genuine smile that she hadn't worn in a very long time. ''Darcy!'' Jane called out, getting to her feet and hurrying over. ''It's so good to see you!'' She threw her arms warmly around her. Startled, Darcy returned the hug and then released her, noticing that there were tears in the corners of her friend's eyes. ''I'm really happy for you,'' the scientist added in a sincere voice, giving her hand a squeeze.
Darcy blinked, blindsided by the sudden rush of friendliness and warmth. ''Why?'' she managed to gasp.
Now Jane looked surprised. ''Because...you know, because you're going to have a baby. Aren't you happy about that?''
''Yes, yeah, I'm happy but...why...'' as Darcy stood there rambling helplessly, the astrophysicist's face changed in understanding. ''Oh. Don't...don't worry about that,'' Jane said softly. A mist ghosted over her eyes. ''It's not an issue anymore.'' She looked away for a moment; a strand of dark hair slid across her face and she tucked it back behind her ear. Then she sank down onto the cushioned window seat and motioned for Darcy to join her. Rather than pressing the subject and asking why it wasn't an issue any more, Darcy filed this information away and decided to keep their initial conversation simple and said, ''So, I guess we're like...refugees now?''
Jane grinned. ''I prefer to think of us as guests but I guess technically we are refugees.'' She glanced around, taking note of their surroundings. ''In extremely posh digs,'' she added.
''Extremely,'' agreed Darcy with a nod.
''Were they having any luck back home?'' the scientist asked.
''I don't think so,'' she admitted with a light sigh. ''It was getting pretty spooky when we left.'' She couldn't help but cringe just a little at the thought of the rapidly darkening world that they had fled from.
''You saw more of what happened than I did,'' said Jane, staring out the window again, her voice suddenly very grey and haunted sounding. ''What the hell was he doing out there?'' she asked, and Darcy knew that she was talking about Lugh Retnick, and what had happened in Connecticut.
''Meddling,'' replied Darcy. ''But Retnick was really just a puppet. I still can't figure out exactly who is behind any of this, there's so many different sides to it, so many different people involved, in the present and the past, all merging into one big ball of chaos and horror.'' She sighed.
''I heard about the...virus or whatever it is that's spreading,'' noted Jane with a frown.
Darcy shook her head. ''It's not a virus.'' Suddenly she was struck with the uncomfortable memory of Penelope's ghastly, black-stained mouth curled up into a smile, eyes glittering with an ancient and terrible intelligence. She swallowed hard.
''Have you...seen...'' the scientist began tremulously.
''I have. I don't really want to talk about it right now.'' The direction of this particular conversation had Darcy growing quite queasy, and she felt the need to change the subject again. She'd just gotten such good news, but her joy, it seemed was going to be short-lived, because there were still so many terrible things out there, practically clawing at the door. ''So, uh, what's there to do for fun around here?''
Jane shrugged. ''Not much, to be honest with you. I feel really out of place, actually, everyone seems to have a stick up their ass about something.'' She shook her head. ''It's not quite what I expected.''
''That's just the way people look here, I think,'' Darcy replied with a roll of her eyes. ''I know exactly what you mean.''
''I guess I expected it to be...more?'' Jane seemed to be trying to find the right words to explain. ''I know that sounds strange because yes, here they are so incredibly advanced compared to us in so many ways but...it's also just like any other place, any other city with people doing their jobs and hurrying along and living their lives. The mundane aspect of it, that's what I wasn't prepared for.''
''I don't mind the mundane,'' declared Darcy. ''I've seen how weird it can get. I relish the ordinary.''
Seeming to be pondering that statement, Jane added, ''I'm starting to see things a little differently now. I was always looking for the big answers, the wonder out there. I thought I was brave, that I would not only endure chaos, but embrace it. And then I started to get a little taste of what chaos really was. That...man, the tall man,'' she said with a shudder. ''That enormous, glowing building. Sometimes I still see it when I close my eyes.''
The scientist gave a rueful shake of her head as she continued, ''It's like once again I've had to reexamine everything I thought I was so sure of. I'm realizing more and more every day now, especially after all of that...this is a world I need to stay on the outside of, as an objective observer. I'm not as strong as you. I don't belong to it the way that you do.'' Darcy opened her mouth to say something but Jane seemed to abruptly shift gears. Reaching into the messenger bag sitting next to her, she inexplicably pulled out a copy of The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying. ''This is a good one. Your friend Prudence recommended it. It sort of makes me feel better about, you know, the whole mortality thing.''
''All that jazz,'' Darcy added, rolling her eyes good-naturedly, though she was inwardly mulling over her friend's words. Jane laughed a little. ''Yeah. It's like you never really think about it until it's right in front of your face, and then it hits you all at once and makes you go a little crazy. I mean, I spent most of my life never really giving it too much of a serious thought.''
''I did,'' Darcy's voice suddenly dropped into sadness against her will as a memory came creeping unbidden across her brain. ''Do you remember Tinkerbell perfume from when you were a kid? Like, the original kind?''
Jane blinked at the abrupt non sequitur but replied, ''Uh, yeah, I think so. I didn't really play too much with girly stuff but...yeah, it came in a little plastic bottle with a heart on it?''
''And it was this nasty bright-ass yellow colour and was probably totally toxic,'' Darcy finished with a nod. ''That's the one. Anyhow, I remember this really dark moment that I had when I was about eight years old. It was right around the time that my mom was first diagnosed, she was getting really sick. I was alone in the house with her one day...my dad was out at the bar or something, that was where he usually was.'' Her eyes narrowed as she continued on with the story. Darcy hadn't thought of this particular event in years but now it was as if she was reliving it all over again, with garish clarity.
''She would go into these weird fits...it would start off really soft, like she'd be carrying on a conversation with someone that I couldn't see. And then the conversation would turn into an argument, and she'd start to pace, and stomp her feet and yell and yell. I went upstairs; I would always go and hide in my room when it happened. I'd just sit there and wish I was somewhere else, far away, where I didn't have to hear her anymore. But this one time, all of a sudden, I looked over at my dresser and saw this tiny little bottle of noxious smelling gold perfume and wondered—what would happen if I drank that? I knew it wasn't meant to be swallowed. Would I die? I somehow suddenly wanted to do something very dangerous, to test the limits of life, fate, the universe, whatever. The strange part was, I wasn't afraid of the consequences because I would have done anything, anything to make her screaming stop, even if that meant hurting myself. I never did anything that day, though, I just kept...staring at that little bottle. I was fucking eight!'' There were no tears threatening to fall, only a sad, collapsing feeling that made her chest ache. Darcy calmed a moment and then continued, in a very quiet voice, ''I can't ever be the kind of mother who makes her child think such things.''
''You won't be,'' Jane quickly assured Darcy, patting her on the back.
''How do I know that? I don't know anything about being a mother! I spent most of my life being afraid of mine, even if it wasn't her fault.'' Darcy hated that this conversation had gotten so out of control. But in a way, she had to acknowledge that it was a good thing—they were openly discussing things that needed to be said. Burying everything never worked, it clawed its way to the surface, stronger and more monstrous.
True to the way the conversation seemed to be running, leaping from topic to topic there and back again like a manic frog, Jane decided not to address Darcy's last statement at all, instead asking, ''Hey, do you remember that Tinkerbell peel-off nail polish? Does anyone make peel-off nail polish anymore?''
Darcy took a deep breath and then let out a little giggle. Forcing the memory away, back into whatever strange compartment in her mind that it had resurfaced from, she grinned and everything was ok for a little while. They were just two friends sitting by a window.
''How did you know that I was pregnant anyway?'' Darcy asked Jane as they walked down the hall towards the throne room. Someone-a messenger, she supposed-had found them and informed her that the King and Queen had requested her presence. ''Frigga told me,'' replied Jane. Darcy shook her head at this. She should have known. The Queen of Asgard knew everything, it seemed. 'She probably knew before me,' Darcy thought to herself. Now they reached the doors and Jane hung back a little. ''I'll catch up with you later,'' the scientist said. ''I think that this is meant to be a private conversation and besides, that room gives me the creeps.'' She turned and headed in the other direction, while Darcy took a deep breath and walked through the doorway.
Frigga and Odin were seated there, staring down regally at her. Still not sure of the proper etiquette, she sank down into a curtsey and bowed her head. She heard Frigga's soft, tinkling laughter. ''Once again, my dear, that isn't necessary.'' The Queen got off of her throne and stepped down and over to Darcy, wrapping her in a warm embrace. She smelled like light and stars and flowers from an alien world. Darcy was instantly comforted. ''I am so happy to see you safe, my dear,'' Frigga whispered to her.
Now the Allfather got up and motioned her forward. With some trepidation, Darcy approached him. He was unsmiling, but not exactly stern, there may have been a small flicker of warmth in his ancient blue eyes, or it simply might have been a trick of the light. ''Let me see your hand, child.'' She knew immediately what he was referring to. Unflinching, she held out her hand to him.
Odin quietly studied the scar across her palm, then raised his head to look directly at Darcy. ''This is very old blood magic. I hope that you realize the magnitude of what you've done.'' That was all he said. Frigga came over now to stand beside the Allfather. She put a hand on his shoulder. ''If that spell was made for anyone, it's them,'' she told her husband pointedly, with a nod in Darcy's direction. ''Now let it be. This is a time for rest and safety.'' She moved away from him and took hold of Darcy's arm. ''Come on, dear, let's take a walk.'' Relieved to be out of the throne room and away from the Allfather, she gratefully followed beside the Queen as they walked out into the gardens. The fresh air felt wonderful on her face. They walked together in comfortable silence for some time, and then Darcy inexplicably found a question tumbling from her lips:
''We won't be safe here forever, will we?''
A glimmer of sadness shone in the Queen's eyes before she answered honestly. ''No, my dear, I'm afraid not. This story is far from over. Many perils still to be faced before the end. But much joy too.''
''Can you see how it ends? All of it, I mean?'' she asked, though the question made Darcy's heart pound and filled her with a sense of danger. She realized that she didn't want to know, but she had to ask. ''Can you see to...to the end of our lives?''
Wordlessly, Frigga gave a very slow nod.
''And—'' Darcy felt like her heart was about to stop now, this was a perilous line of inquiry, but one that she couldn't stop now that she'd begun.
''You will be together,'' said the Queen. ''That's all you need to know.'' They took a few more steps and then she added, ''It is a greater gift than you realize. Not everything dies the same way, but almost everything dies alone. Except for you and him.''
Darcy went back to Loki's room with Frigga's words still burning brightly in her mind. Shaking her head to clear it, she walked over to the bookcase and pulled down an old volume and began to read. It was a dry, rather boring book, but the blandness helped to refocus her mind. After a little while, though, it became slightly too boring, and she walked over to replace it on the shelf. Then she heard the door open behind her. Loki walked inside, tired and annoyed. He'd spent a rather miserable and annoying several hours trapped in several meetings discussing matters that he either had no opinion on whatsoever, or opinions that would simply be futile to voice. After standing still for a moment, taking a deep breath and running his fingers through his hair, Loki's eyes set on Darcy. Pure want stormed over him acutely; he crossed the room and had his arms around her in an instant. He had felt trapped and restless and angry for so much of the day and now he craved the freedom and peace that she gave.
''I need you now,'' he told her in a dark, low voice that rasped against her ear. ''It's been too damned long.'' He pulled her against him tightly so that she could feel exactly how much he needed her. Darcy trembled a little at the feel of him pressing against her lower back. Putting his hands firmly on her shoulders, Loki spun her around and took a long look into her eyes. She saw burning longing in his, and also something else, some hidden, silvery shard of fear, tucked far back. She knew that Loki felt lost on Asgard, uneasy; this place would never be his home again. But he had brought her there because it was the safest place, and he cared about her well-being above all else.
The last day or so since escaping from the Palace of Souls had passed by strangely—Darcy still hadn't adjusted to the ordinary flow of time and it sometimes still felt as though she were moving in and out of a fog, speeding up and then slowing down. It felt like forever since they'd last touched each other, been intimate in the way that they ordinarily craved so. Loki slipped his hand around the back of her head, threaded his tapered fingers through Darcy's hair and tugged a little on the strands. A smile shivered across her parted lips. Then he tilted her head back slightly, bringing his mouth down against hers with an insistent, possessive kiss. While he kissed her, his hands moved over her shoulders and down to the hem of her shirt, which he began to pull up. Darcy broke the kiss and stepped back for a moment, helping, pulling the shirt over her head and tossing it to the floor.
Loki's eyes roved over her hungrily, and then he pulled her to him, claiming her mouth again. He bit her lip, her eyelashes fluttered. Then he trailed down, his mouth fastening on her neck, leaving marks, she knew, but didn't care. She wanted him to. With everything else consuming her mind, Darcy had almost forgotten how good this was, how like oxygen to starved cells. How beautiful he looked when he was caught up in this desperate, frantic need to pull her closer, because that's where things made sense. She was burning up, just as eager as he was.
''Tell me you want me. Say it!'' he ordered. Darcy remembered those words, he'd said them to her before. When he was vulnerable but trying to hide it, Loki demanded love and begged for it at the same time. Instead, though, she found herself saying, ''I love you.'' Darcy held her breath once she felt the words pass her lips, they seemed to hang trembling in midair. Loki was utterly still for a moment, and there was a deep, dark look in his eyes, like a lake in the evening. He didn't say anything, but she could feel his heart pounding as he tilted her back on the bed. She seemed to fall back in slow motion against those amazingly soft sheets as he pulled off her shoes, taking his time. Then he dragged off her socks, running his cool fingers over her feet as he did so. She trembled at how good it felt. Darcy seemed to be going into a trancelike state, his actions were totally hypnotic. Reaching up, Loki slowly and deliberately worked to unzip the front of her jeans and then drag them and her panties down and off of her in one single motion, leaving her bare and open to him. His fingers trailed up along her leg, higher still to the inside of her thighs.
After a few teasing brushes that seemed to last for far too long, his fingers finally found the place that she needed them to. Blood pounded in his ears as he stared down at her. He loved the heat of her, how wet she got for him, just him, how eager. He loved the sounds that she made, how she would moan and thrash and beg to have him inside because that, more than anything else, felt like prayer.
''Please,'' whimpered Darcy, imploring him with her big eyes. Obligingly, Loki thrust two long fingers inside of her and she cried out his name. His cock throbbed at both the sound and the feel of her. She rocked her hips wantonly, he let out a small groan. He had wanted to make this last, but he needed to be inside of her immediately, needed to lose himself. Because she made sense even if nothing in the universe did. She was making little mewling sounds beneath him, nearly drunk with desire. Unable to hold out any longer, he pulled away from her and quickly shed his remaining clothes, then climbed back over her.
Loki firmly pinned Darcy's hands up over her head and held them there; she let out a moan of delight as heat and arousal flooded through her at the sensation. Finally, he pushed inside of her, all at once, and she cried out. Oh, he wanted it to be slower, but he was frantic, the feel of her had made him half-crazy, the sight of her pinned beneath him, so lovely, the knowledge that she was carrying his child, that the last time they had done this was the time that it had happened-no, there was no time for slow. This was fire, insistent fire, needy and devouring.
He was thrusting into her like a madman, still holding her down, so hard that she might bruise for just an instant, but Darcy loved it, loved the feel of him possessing her. So much of him, all around, she was drowning. Loki was in her head, in her blood, and...he...was...doing that snake thing with his hips; he lifted her up a little, thrust to just the right spot and then she came apart with a scream. Her climax triggered his and she felt him come, felt it deep inside of her, stronger than before, and she kept orgasming, kept clenching and squeezing around him as wave after wave crashed over her. ''So good, baby,'' she managed to gasp out as one last glorious tremor shook her. She felt drunk again, dazed, so in-fucking-love that she felt like her heart might explode. He collapsed on top of her, rested his head in the crook of her neck.
Darcy still felt warm and glowing as the seconds slowly limped by. It was a feeling of soft, muted contentedness, like being stoned and watching incense smoke drift lazily through the air. He finally pulled himself out of her, leaving her with a remarkable emptiness. Loki readjusted his position, settling back down beside her, his hand resting on her stomach.''It felt...extra good this time,'' she mentioned after a moment. Her voice was almost shy. ''When you...came inside me, it was different. More.''
His lips curved in a sudden smile of understanding. ''You're..uh, getting it at its full potency, so to speak. I don't exactly need to worry about getting you pregnant anymore.''
''Wow,'' Darcy murmured, resting her hand over his on her belly as she contemplated that statement. The happy, dazed look on her face right then suddenly made it hard for Loki to catch his breath. He held her even more tightly. ''I saw Eir,'' she told him. A slight pang of apprehension went through him but the calm smile on her face let him know that there was nothing to fear and he relaxed. ''She said that everything's fine.'' Loki smiled at this, breathed a little easier, even if only for a little while.
''Everything is fine,'' he repeated, the words ghosting cooly over Darcy's skin in a mantra as they fell together into that relaxed twilight space before dreams come. Just for a moment, she almost believed it. ''Everything is fine.''
He never said that he loved her. And he might never say it, Darcy knew. Not out loud. But she swore that she could hear him whisper it across her mind as she was falling asleep.